Building Resilience with Pradeepa Narayanaswamy
Release Date: 07/16/2018
Show Notes – Pradeepa
Is a fertility coach – her purpose is to coach men, women and couples going through fertility and help them make their journey suck less.
Went through her own journey and tried everything that was offered. They had every treatment and test but after the 8th failure she found the courage to say “let’s stop here.” She was struggling through mental, emotional, spiritual and physical pain. She lacked clarity, she didn’t know what she was doing, she was just going through the motions. She stopped thinking for herself. “What do we really want?” They decided to go down the adoption route. It took more than three years more to get over the fact of unexplained fertility.
She decided she was going to own fertility moving forward. It wasn’t going to own her anymore. But it took eight years of struggling to get there.
She struggled with jealously when her friends and family were throwing baby showers.
She used to wonder “why me?” Now reflecting back she is very grateful for her infertility experience even though it sucked for her at the time because now she knows her purpose in life. Now she can be that person who can really help people going through those struggles that she went to. She has dedicated her life to serve the infertility tribe.
This not something that you can sweep under the rug. You need to honour your emotions. And then work out how you are going to consciously move forward.
It was like she was stuck in quicksand and there was nothing to help her climb out, get up, and move forward in her journey. She wants to help other people out of their quicksand.
We discuss the effect that infertility can have on relationships. Pradeepa talks about having an invisible wall between her husband and herself during their journey. There was no national relationship between them. They lost that connection that they had. It was very robotic and process based. It became a routine. She puts a lot of emphasis to work with couples because your marriage should never end because of infertility. It is just a bump on your life’s journey with marriage.
She offers retreats where couples can come and rejuvenate their relationships. Honour each other. Why did we choose to be together? How do you want it to be moving forward? What is your goal together as a couple? What do you want to achieve? Your life doesn’t end with infertility.
Even if you end up having a child it does not mean your relationship struggles will go away. You can’t afford to sweep it under the rug because when it does come up it will come up like a volcano spewing fire and ashes.
If you cannot go deeper into yourself it is hard to walk forward on the right path. The key is willing to go deeper not only for your sake but for the sake of the people around you.
How you show up as a person matters the most.