89. death, sex, & skirts: horizontal with the co-hosts of skirt club (1 of 2)

Season 3 mostly consists of threesomes, and in this episode I lie down with the founder — as well as the New York City host — of Skirt Club, a private women’s club for the curious kind.

 Skirt Club is also the name of their sex party, an event designed exclusively for women to explore their bicuriosity. Many of these women are primarily in romantic and sexual relationships with men. Just as I was, when I attended the Rocker Chic-themed edition of Skirt Club a couple of months ago in a mansion-like loft in New York’s Financial District. 

If your bunny ears perked immediately, darling, you can apply to be a member at skirtclub.co.uk 

Genevieve LeJeune created the Skirt Club enterprise (they currently have parties all over Europe and the U.S.) to give women a space to explore their sexuality, without men present. She felt her bisexuality was being exploited for her boyfriend’s amusement, and wanted a space away from the male gaze, curated specifically for female empowerment, freedom, and sensual exploration. She couldn’t find it anywhere. So she built it. She is a fiercely independent businesswoman and adventurer, a world-traveler, a stigma-challenging, femme-presenting, entrepreneur of the unconventional. And she is also very, very beautiful.

Shelby Nicole is Genevieve’s friend (Genevieve said that she doesn’t work with anyone she wouldn’t want to be friends with, so she is living the maxim “do what you love with people you like”). Shelby is also Skirt Club’s New York City Event Manager and hostess. She greeted me with lingerie and a smile when I arrived in my sequins and leather. Shelby is a creative of many kinds, an actor, a filmmaker, a writer, a model. She can be found in her sex kitten form, resplendent in lingerie on her Instagram @reclusemuse — but you’ll have to request to follow her, because she is Private.

Shelby is a challenging person, as in, she challenges every idea. You may find this conversation to be less vulnerable than my usual episodes, perhaps because I had just come from a funeral, but maybe also because I felt, in a way, a bit on guard. This was interesting. I usually curate conditions for myself to record under which I don’t feel defensive in any way. I don’t usually get horizontal with people I feel the need to verbally parry with — it makes it harder for me to share with you my special self, my soft underbelly. I did my best here, and I was honest about feeling challenged, which is ultimately the the powerful thing I ask of myself. 

So in this episode you’ll see what happens when I feel the need to justify and defend my words — I get louder, I talk over them, and I do not cry. I try to live by Brene Brown’s mantra: “Don’t shrink, don’t puff up, just stand your sacred ground.” But. I think I puffed up here.

Still, in this episode we talk about Max’s death and the funeral, magical thinking, how Genevieve was taught nothing about sex growing up, and Shelby learned through books left on her bed. We talked about Shelby’s matter-of-fact-ness and my reaction to it. We talk about British humor, awkwardness, and media, the internet as a safe haven, Shelby’s first period, how none of us want children (and how refreshing that is for me!), the story of how Genevieve married a man when she never wanted to marry anyone, having very little sex, personally, in a life that’s full of it, marital bed death & resensitization, the 4pm masturbation break, a brief history of Shelby’s search for orgasm, my deep envious crushes on girls, the kind of women we’re attracted to, distinguishing bisexual & pansexual, recognizing if we are bisexual and biromantic, and how Genevieve’s ex was repulsed by her interest in women.

This episode was mixed and mastered by Irving Gadhoury. You can find him for all your audio needs at IGrecording.com. As ever, my lovely intro music was composed by Alan Markley, who is on Instagram as @plasticcannons, and my saucy likeness of a logo was illustrated by Shana Shay, whom you can hire through 99 designs.

In next week’s episode, which is available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts, we discuss first sexual experiences with women, my desire to voyeur at their Skirt Club party, and, to complete the trifecta of taboo topics, we also talk about: money. To listen to that episode, and for access to The Full Horizontal, which includes all the part twos of every conversation, go to Patreon.com/horizontalwithlila and become a $7+/month patron.

Until next time: May you have someone to love, something to do, and something to look forward to. In 3 days, I fly down to Orlando to attend my first podcast conference, so that is what I’m looking forward to!

Thank you, my dear. Thank you for getting horizontal.

And now, come lie down with us in the Financial District of New York, New York.