WifeMotherLeader Podcast
WifeMotherLeader is a show that provides inspiration and practical advice on how to successfully integrate the roles of wife, mother, and leader in today's hectic and stressful world.
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#87: 4 Valuable Career Lessons
03/13/2022
#87: 4 Valuable Career Lessons
I gave a “career path” talk recently and outlined 4 key lessons that I had learned along the way. What I actually discovered was that those lessons had shaped me as a person and how I live my life. Alignment between work and life is so important and these lessons might help you: Plan in Pencil Trust Your Gut Create a Point of View Be Her/Him/Them
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#86: Celebrating My 40th Birthday--Attitude is Gratitude
03/05/2022
#86: Celebrating My 40th Birthday--Attitude is Gratitude
When I was 30, I imagined a grand celebration (maybe an exotic trip or a huge party) for my 40th birthday. I imagined a different body, career, home, etc. As I look back on celebrating my birthday, the only word that comes to mind is gratitude. Tune in to this episode to hear what I am grateful for at age 40 and how I celebrated! www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#85: Two Questions I'll Ask Myself For the Next Decade
02/19/2022
#85: Two Questions I'll Ask Myself For the Next Decade
I am turning 40 this coming week so there’s been a lot of time for reflection on my life and choices. This episode isn’t going to focus on that. But, I have landed on a couple of questions that I want to keep asking myself this year and throughout the next decade. So, in this episode I am going to share these two questions in the hope that they might help you wherever you are on your own personal journey. What am I afraid of? What will I regret? www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#84: 5 Marriage Lessons Learned in a Pandemic
02/12/2022
#84: 5 Marriage Lessons Learned in a Pandemic
One casualty of the pandemic that we aren’t talking about is marital relationships. Living through a pandemic puts a strain on everyone and everything. In this episode, I share about the lessons that I’ve learned about marriage in 2 years of the pandemic. There are some important things that I’ll be taking with me from this season so help our marriage be even stronger. Looking to talk or connect. Check out my free 20 minute laser coaching: www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#83: Practical Ways to Get Relief in Your Home Life
02/05/2022
#83: Practical Ways to Get Relief in Your Home Life
We’ve been in this pandemic for nearly two years. Life still feels locked down/restricted and yet the work continues. Schools are back in session, but at any time your child could come for days or weeks either with COVID or with an exposure. In this episode let’s talk about practical ways for you to get some relief: meal prep, house cleaning, laundry, kids, mental health and physical health. Want to talk? Need some advice? www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#82: Setting an Intention for the Year
02/01/2022
#82: Setting an Intention for the Year
I love goal setting and planning. I’ve shared on this podcast in years past my goal setting process and areas. I have goals for this year but in this episode I am focused on my intentions for 2022. Tune in to learn about the difference between a goal and an intention and how you can utilize both to become the person you want to be. This is about WHO you want to be in the world, not about what you want to achieve. Want to connect with me to talk about your goals or intentions for 2022? https://www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#81: Having a 4th Child--Crazy, Amazing or Both?
01/22/2022
#81: Having a 4th Child--Crazy, Amazing or Both?
Right as the pandemic started, we had been hoping to get pregnant with our 4th (and final) child. However, the uncertainty of a pandemic was too much for us to try and navigate along with remote schooling for our kids, remote work, and just trying to stay
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#80: A Coach Was My Secret Weapon in 2021
01/14/2022
#80: A Coach Was My Secret Weapon in 2021
I’ve had more crucial conversations at work in this one year than I’ve had in my entire career. Part of that is because I lead a team and have a leadership role within my department. Part of it is because I lead with my values so I can’t sit by and
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#79: Should You Quit Your Job?
01/08/2022
#79: Should You Quit Your Job?
We’ve all heard the numbers about the Great Resignation. But, the real question is should YOU leave your job? What questions do you need to ask yourself to know if there is any hope where you are, if you should move to a new organization or if you should take a break from work altogether? Tune in to this episode to walk through each path to help determine your next move.
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#78: I'm Tired and I Need To Tell Someone!
04/25/2021
#78: I'm Tired and I Need To Tell Someone!
Are you tired, exhausted, overwhelmed? Have you found yourself being more irritable, less focused, less patient, uninterested in things that you care about? This year has worn us down and many folks are at a breaking point and may be close to or experiencing burnout, mental exhaustion, and even physical symptoms. In this episode, we talk about being willing to share what you are experiencing with someone you trust and how to take steps to get the support you need. Resources: Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session
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#77: Goal Setting Success and Struggles: A Week of Receipts!
04/04/2021
#77: Goal Setting Success and Struggles: A Week of Receipts!
In episode 76, I shared about my goals for 2021. I talked about focused on key habits in several areas of my life, along with a few achievement oriented goals. Well, I wanted to follow-up immediately with examples from this past week so you see the ups and downs that come with goal setting and habit building, even when you are focused on areas that you have complete control over! Looking for connection or support? Sign-up for a free laser coaching session at
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#76: Goal Setting and the Illusion of Control
03/28/2021
#76: Goal Setting and the Illusion of Control
Have you made it through Q1 of 2021 without any goals for the year? (Raising my hand!). I am ready to set some goals, but first had to have an honest conversation with myself about what I actually have control over. Listen to this episode if you want to understand how the illusion of control can sabotage your goal setting! I’ll share my habit goals in 4 areas of life (personal development, marriage, parenting and career) as well as my achievement goals. Finally, you’ll learn a quick way to set your own goals for the rest of 2021. Looking for some quick, free coaching tackle a work-life challenge? Go to www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#75: Racism Against Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders
03/21/2021
#75: Racism Against Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders
There is no way I will record a podcast without talking about what happened in Atlanta on Tuesday, March 16th and the rise in anti-Asian violence in 2020 and into 2021. Racism is alive and well. Sexism is alive and well. Structural racism and government sponsored racism was renewed and accelerated by #45, but it’s always been here. In this episode, I talk about showing up as an ally (what to do and what NOT to do). I also share with my Asian American and Pacific Islander brothers and sisters about how they have power over how, when and with whom they engage on this subject.
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#74: Gimme a Break!
03/15/2021
#74: Gimme a Break!
You know you need a break! You’re exhausted and running on fumes. But, how can you actually take a break, especially during COVID? In this episode, I share about the restart of my hotel night away and share other ways that I build breaks into my day/week/life. Listen in to learn sustainable and practical ways (big and small) to build breaks into your life. Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#73: Wise and Fine at 39?! Happy Birthday to Me
03/07/2021
#73: Wise and Fine at 39?! Happy Birthday to Me
I’ve learned some important lessons in the last year. My birthday is a great time to reflect on them. I want to approach the last year of my 30s with wisdom, humility and boldness. Lessons learned include: My story and my experience have value to others I have a point of view that is based on education AND lived experience I have zero interest in showing up in a space and not being able to be myself. Calm and grace under pressure are remarkably valuable There are opportunities in front of me every day to give and serve I can’t have it all Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session
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#72: Hope and Fear in a New Year
02/28/2021
#72: Hope and Fear in a New Year
2021 is not a rebound year. Giving yourself the space to acknowledge the fear and loss of 2020 is important if you’re going to move forward in hope. In this episode, Donielle shares the fears she dealt with in 2020 along with how she is walking in hope for 2021. Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#71: Communication and Grace to Strengthen Your Marriage During COVID-19
10/05/2020
#71: Communication and Grace to Strengthen Your Marriage During COVID-19
Marriage takes work even in the best of times. But, marriage during a pandemic must also take on stress response, tight quarters, no alone time, financial challenges, etc. Sharing the load of childcare, trying to keep working, and the stress of what we are experiencing collectively in our national and world is going to expose the cracks in your relationship. One article I read talks about how those cracks can become a fracture. In today’s episode, I share how those cracks can be an opportunity to strengthen your relationship by putting in some “reps” on relationship muscles that will serve you well beyond this experience. Today’s episode focuses on communication, grace and giving the benefit of the doubt. Communication Finding time to connect each day, and not just about chores, kids, etc. Sharing challenges or grievances without blaming Don’t rush to solve things in a single conversation Speaking up when you need something Example Grace What we are experiencing requires us to show grace to ourselves and to each other Definition of grace Example Benefit of the doubt Building trust De-centering ourselves Seeking to understand Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session
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How You Can Start Addressing Racism
09/20/2020
How You Can Start Addressing Racism
You're committed to being anti-racist, learning and want to take action! But, what should you do next and where do you start? In this episode, I share how you can create a personal plan to use your resources, time, and skills to address racism. Don't be discouraged or afraid. You can take both small steps and big leaps! Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session
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#69: My Experience of Being Black in the Workplace
08/15/2020
#69: My Experience of Being Black in the Workplace
The third episode in my series on race explores my experiences in the workplace, which were actually formed by my experiences as a student. I share about explicit and implicit experiences of racism, both at the system level (policies, etc) and personal level with interactions with co-workers and managers. This is one of the most vulnerable episodes I have ever recorded. Laying bare my feelings, frustrations, and hurts. And, you'll understand why to this day I still have to shape and mold myself to fit into white spaces when I first start a job. Every Black person's experience is unique, but there are common threads that you'll hear in my story. Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#68: Are Your Expectations Hurting You?
07/25/2020
#68: Are Your Expectations Hurting You?
Comparison to others and sky-high expectations about ourselves is often framed as a competitive motivational tool. However, it often results in self-criticism and discontent. I see it in myself and in others that I coach and support. During COVID, if you have some semblance of financial stability or security during this time, the pressure to use this time for self-improvement, reflection, reading, self-care, etc. is rampant and dangerous. And, I am one of the people telling you to take care of yourself. Telling you to find a way to engage with black and brown people in a meaningful way if you care about eliminating racism. Last week, I told you about my coping mechanisms like audiobooks, exercise and even regular sex. And, yet, I am telling you right now to lower your expectations. Your #1 goal in a pandemic is to survive with your health, both mental and physical, intact. Your #1 goal is the health and safety of your family, to the extent that you have some control over your immediate household and what you do. Second, if you have a job, your #2 is to keep you job such that you can provide for yourself. Listen to this episode as I outline 3 Steps to lowering your expectations in a way that actually promotes long-term success as the person you want to be. Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#67: What is Helping You Get Through This Time?
07/17/2020
#67: What is Helping You Get Through This Time?
Is your go to chocolate, Netflix, or scrolling Instagram? We are all finding ways to cope. Some healthy. Some....well, not. In this episode, I share some of the things I am using to cope, process, and entertain/escape. It's fun, honest, and practical. Things I talked about in the episode: Books: Review and Subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session
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#66: Are You About to Burnout With Kelley Anne Bonner
07/09/2020
#66: Are You About to Burnout With Kelley Anne Bonner
Join me in an honest, funny and raw conversation with licensed therapist, , as we talk about burnout. Kelley shares what burnout is and how to recognize it. We talk about why so many women are close to or already experiencing burnout, including the ways in which we try to address it by being more productive and just trying harder (hint: those don’t work!). In our conversation, Kelley shares her 3-step framework to help you get in alignment so that you can address your own burnout, or prevent it. As two black women, we also discuss how COVID-19 and the racial climate in America are contributing to the collective exhaustion and risk of mental health challenges. This is an important and wonderful conversation that you should take time to listen to and share with someone who needs to hear it. Connect with Kelley: Instagram: @letsburnbright Please take a moment to review and subscribe in iTunes Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session
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#65: Black Love in A Racist World
06/27/2020
#65: Black Love in A Racist World
The second episode in my series on race focuses on the importance and beauty of Black Love and Black Marriage in a world that is racist. I share about how my husband and I have created a safe space in our home and marriage to be our full selves while unpacking the racial injustice that we experience. Listen to examples of how everyday experiences with race play out and how it we try think through and unpack them. While our marriage is unique to us, the experience is likely similar to what many Black couples face. www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#64: The Power of Meditation with Christine Forte
06/18/2020
#64: The Power of Meditation with Christine Forte
In today's episode, I have a conversation with Dr. Christine Forte, a licensed counselor and host of the Mental Oasis Podcast. Christine and I talk about meditation and how it can be an important tool to help busy women (and men!) who are juggling so many things.
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#63: What Are You Going To Sacrifice to be Anti-Racist?
06/07/2020
#63: What Are You Going To Sacrifice to be Anti-Racist?
A deeply personal episode where I share my thoughts, anger and grief over the America that I've known for 38 years that many are just waking up to. Listen to my thoughts on how important it is to understand systemic racism before you can start supporting and helping. I'll also share why supporting, standing in solidarity and even allyship are minimums if you really want to see change.
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#62: Simple Ways to Care For Yourself Every Day
05/23/2020
#62: Simple Ways to Care For Yourself Every Day
Self-care has become an overused mantra that only adds guilt because it’s one more thing you are not doing! During this pandemic, I’ve tried to find small ways to care for my mental, physical and spiritual health. In this episode, I dive into each one to help you identify ways you might include self-care into your daily life and why it doesn’t necessarily mean massages and manicures:) Sleep Eat as healthy as you can At least 1 day of “self-care” (hair, non-pajamas or sweats, makeup if you wear it, etc.) Exercise 4-6 days per week Carve our alone time Pray Daily Share this episode Sign-up for a
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#61: Let's Talk About Mental Health
05/15/2020
#61: Let's Talk About Mental Health
May is Mental Health Awareness Month. In the midst of COVID-19, the need for mental health support has only increased. While it would be great for employers to cover mental health services and provide support, many do not. So, for now, it’s up to you to advocate for yourself and get the support you need. You are not alone. There is help and support. In this episode, we will talk about where to find it. We need insurance and policy makers to address mental health like they do physical health. Until this happens, we need to take it into account ourselves Your goal is to maintain your mental health and potentially learn new strategies and coping mechanisms. Depending on your circumstance, you may be going after these things on your own. Apps App: App: Your organization's employee assistance program Therapy : : (individual and couples therapy): See a provider in your health insurance network Prayer/Scripture: App: Greater Good Magazine: Mental health stigma is dangerous and must be addressed Learn about the resources and share them with your family, colleagues and team Ask HR to share resources Be transparent about how you’re doing Share this episode Sign-up for a https://www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#60: The Clarity of Mothering During a Pandemic
05/08/2020
#60: The Clarity of Mothering During a Pandemic
Happy Mother’s Day! In today’s episode, I share 6 things that have become clear and in-focus during this global pandemic. Some are lessons that I already knew that are being reinforced and a few are new things that want to take with me when this pandemic is over. God’s grace is sufficient to sustain me My children’s mental and physical health is a gift that I don’t take for granted My kids are not judging me, they are longing for me I need to be playing more In an effort to not helicopter, I was too hands off related to school I am a better mother when my cup is full Enjoy this episode? Subscribe in iTunes or Spotify and share it with one other mother! Looking for some advice or help during this time? Sign-up for a www.wifemotherleader.com/coaching
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#59: Being You Even When You're Not 100%
05/01/2020
#59: Being You Even When You're Not 100%
Today, I want to talk about WORK. Yeah, that thing we are supposed to be getting done during a pandemic, while caring for kids, worrying about our parents, cooking 3 meals per day and keeping our homes extra clean. Sounds ridiculous when I say it like that. And, yet, if you are still able to work, that is a blessing, as so many people have lost jobs and thus income. About 3 weeks into this, I was on a call and noticed that I wasn’t “myself”. I first attributed it to fatigue, some anxiety, and the total change we had experienced. And, while that is all true, I think something deeper was happening. Not only was I not at 100% (who is?), I was actually changing my behavior and pulling back on the way I show up at work. And, this is not judging or being harsh on myself during a pandemic. I actually was struggling because I knew that I wasn’t being myself. On this episode, I want to share a few things that I learned and how I moved forward, including showing up as that person at work this week and having some awesome team members reach out to based on a direct response I gave (typical of me:)) What you need to understand: No one is at 100% right now. Be honest with yourself about how you’re doing. Look for evidence, data, or even feedback that you’ve been given. Be honest with your manager about how you’re doing. If you need help, ask for it. Have a discussion about the prioritization of what you are working on. Identify the specific strength that you bring to your team. Focus on those, even if you’re not at 100% Focus on quality and not quantity. If you don’t have a system to track what you are working on (trello, basecamp, asana, etc, figure out a system to help keep you sane) you need to get one. It can be just for you. Each day, identify at least one important thing that you need to work on. Spend the first 30 min of your work time on that thing It would be ridiculous of me to not address the realities of home that I can say with nearly 100% certainly are having an impact on you. Ask for what you need from your spouse. More cooking? More help with kids? More flex? If you don’t feel like things are being split correctly, this is the time to speak up (in love). Decrease you information intake Find someone to talk to. Connect with a trusted friend, sister, mother, etc. Bring mindfulness into your life. Maybe you tried it before and it didn’t work. Try again. Do at least one self-care thing per week, and more if you can. Sleep Sign-up for a free 20 min flash coaching session
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#58: Surviving Homeschool During COVID-19 with DeLise Bernard and Dericka Oddoye
04/23/2020
#58: Surviving Homeschool During COVID-19 with DeLise Bernard and Dericka Oddoye
DeLise Bernard and Dericka Oddoye , the creators of share their journey of creating a community of parents navigating the challenges of becoming “instant homeschoolers” due to COVID-19. From the moment that their own lives changed to the quick and deeply thoughtful way they created this virtual “PTA”, which now has over 5000 members, you don’t want to miss this interview. Dericka and DeLise provide some great practical tips including: How to create a schedule (and give your kids choice) What to do to address the dreaded “I’m bored” (brilliant idea!) How to help your kids be more self-sufficient using the “fend for yourself” technique The best way to utilize online resources The important of recognizing the emotional toll this has taken for kids Additionally, DeLise and Dericka share their own personal realizations and during this time and how it’s helping them be kinder to themselves, recognize their own strengths, and be braver in a time when they’ve been called to serve others in such an important way. This is a conversation you don’t want to miss! You can find Surviving Homeschool on these platforms:
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