loader from loading.io

"The Silent Third Parent" - A Family Blended By Grief

Grief Out Loud

Release Date: 03/29/2022

Born For This Work - Supporting Grief & Death (Valenca Valenzuela, MSW) show art Born For This Work - Supporting Grief & Death (Valenca Valenzuela, MSW)

Grief Out Loud

Valenca Valenzuela, MSW, was born on Día de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) which seems fitting for someone who grew up to hold space for people before and after a death. Valenca is the Volunteer and Group Coordinator at Dougy Center, supporting children, teens, young adults and their adult family members who are grieving a death. As a death doula, she supports people who are facing the end of their lives. She is also an instructor for the program, readying others to do similar work.  Valenca comes to this work as someone with a lot of lived experience. When she was 16, her father died of...

info_outline
We Have No New Memories - Amanda Drews & Buzzy's Bees show art We Have No New Memories - Amanda Drews & Buzzy's Bees

Grief Out Loud

Amanda Drews is the founder of , the organization she started after her son Hudson, who was 13 months old, died of SUDC (Sudden and Unexplained Death in Childhood). Amanda started Buzzy’s Bees with a mission to provide financial support to families dealing with the unexpected loss of a child. Over time, Amanda realized what families really needed and wanted was a chance to talk about their children. So she launched the where families meet with professional writers and artists who capture the essence of their child and their life in a unique piece of art.   In this episode we talk...

info_outline
Comedy & Grief & Father's Day - A Reprise show art Comedy & Grief & Father's Day - A Reprise

Grief Out Loud

This episode originally aired in June, 2019.  What is it about dark humor and why are we drawn to it when wrestling with painful life events? Laughter, especially the kind that wells up from a shared understanding of heartbreak, can be a surprising aspect of grief. Harry Jensen's father died of stage 4 colon cancer in January of 2017. Harry turned to stand-up comedy as a way to put his grief into words that often spark discomfort and uncertainty, but also serve as inspiration for people in the audience to open up about their own grief. We discuss prompting uncomfortable laughter,...

info_outline
All About The Kids - And The Adults Who Support Them show art All About The Kids - And The Adults Who Support Them

Grief Out Loud

Dr. Micki Burns, Chief Clinical Officer at and Dr. Laura Landry, Director of Evaluation & Research at the JAG Institute join us to talk numbers. They, along with the team at Judi's House/JAG Institute, created the , the Childhood Bereavement Estimation Model, which estimates how many children and teens will experience the death of a parent/caregiver or sibling before they turn 18.  For years that number in the U.S. was 1 in 14. For 2022, it's increased to 1 in 13, reflecting the rise in deaths across the country due to COVID, substance misuse, and other causes. Laura and Micki talk about...

info_outline
We're All Experts In Our Own Grief - Rebecca Soffer & The Modern Loss Handbook show art We're All Experts In Our Own Grief - Rebecca Soffer & The Modern Loss Handbook

Grief Out Loud

Rebecca Soffer, co-founder of the Modern Loss Community, started becoming an expert in grief the moment she learned that her mother Shelby was killed in a car crash. Her expertise expanded when four years later, her father Ray died of a heart attack while traveling.  As a single woman in her early thirties, Rebecca needed to talk about her grief, and she really needed to hear others talk about theirs. It was this longing for an ongoing conversation and led her, along with co-founder Gabi Birkner, to start the .  Nine years later, Rebecca just published her second book - . It's the...

info_outline
Grief Is Love - Marisa Renee Lee show art Grief Is Love - Marisa Renee Lee

Grief Out Loud

As humans, we have a pervasive desire to compartmentalize. To box up messy thoughts and emotions and “just get on with it already.” For Marisa Renee Lee, this was the approach she took to navigating grief. Grief that started when she was 12 and her mother, Lisa, was diagnosed with MS. Grief that grew as her mother was later diagnosed with cancer and died in 2008. Grief that expanded to included infertility, pregnancy loss, and most recently, a cousin who died of COVID-19.  These last three losses led Marisa to realize that she didn’t have to box up her grief and shove it to the...

info_outline
"How Are Your Parents?" - Sibling Grief & Jordon Ferber

Grief Out Loud

In grief land, lots of groups are talked about as invisible or forgotten. Children, parents grieving a miscarriage, ex-partners, and siblings. For siblings, their grief often exists in the shadow of their parents – or it’s at least treated that way by others.   ran into that when his younger brother, Russell, died when Russell was 21. While Jordon’s parents recognized that Jordon needed support just as much as they did, the rest of his sphere started where most people do, with the question, “How are your parents?” Jordon is the host and creator of the podcast. He's also a...

info_outline
Trauma & Grief - Meghan Riordan Jarvis, LCSW show art Trauma & Grief - Meghan Riordan Jarvis, LCSW

Grief Out Loud

Being a plumber doesn’t mean the pipes in your house never leak.  Being a landscaper doesn’t mean your own yard is magically free of weeds. Why is it then that those of us who work in grief sometimes fall prey to the magical thinking that we will somehow be immune to the heartbreak when someone dies? Meghan Riordan Jarvis, LCSW, is a trauma-informed psychotherapist with over 20 years of clinical experience who harbored the same secret wish. A wish which imploded when her mother died in 2019, just two years after her dad died of cancer. While Meghan’s training and clinical acumen...

info_outline
Splintering Grief - DJ Arsene Versailles & Marked By COVID show art Splintering Grief - DJ Arsene Versailles & Marked By COVID

Grief Out Loud

Lingering. Shivering. Simmering. Splintering. These are the words DJ Arsene Versailles wrote to describe grief after his mother, Florcie Yves Versailles, died of COVID-19 in May of 2020. This grief was and continues to be layered - as most grief is - and some of these layers are specific to his mom being a Black woman who died during a pandemic, of a disease that has come to be so much more than just a medical diagnosis. DJ's mom was committed to social justice and this inspired him to do similar work in the wake of her death. After meeting Kristin Urquiza, co-founder of Marked by COVID, he...

info_outline
"The Silent Third Parent" - A Family Blended By Grief

Grief Out Loud

Anne Gudger was pregnant with her first child, Jake, when her husband Kent died in a car crash. Years later she met and married Scott and they had a daughter, Maria. Fast forward to March of 2020, the beginning of the pandemic, when Anne and Maria found themselves drinking a lot of coffee and talking about grief. Those conversations inspired them to start Coffee and Grief, a Facebook group for folks wanting to connect around loss. The Facebook group grew into a series of curated readings called Coffee Talk where writers share short pieces about anything in the realm of grief.  Maria and...

info_outline
 
More Episodes

Anne Gudger was pregnant with her first child, Jake, when her husband Kent died in a car crash. Years later she met and married Scott and they had a daughter, Maria. Fast forward to March of 2020, the beginning of the pandemic, when Anne and Maria found themselves drinking a lot of coffee and talking about grief. Those conversations inspired them to start Coffee and Grief, a Facebook group for folks wanting to connect around loss. The Facebook group grew into a series of curated readings called Coffee Talk where writers share short pieces about anything in the realm of grief. 
Maria and Anne are funny and warm and somehow make talking about grief feel comfortable.
In our conversation we discuss:

  • What it was like raising Jake as a young widow.
  • How Kent's memory acts as the silent third parent in their blended family.
  • Why community matters when it comes to loss.
  • How writing can help people integrate grief.

Read Anne's writing at Anne Gudger

Join the Coffee and Grief Facebook group or visit their public Coffee and Grief page to learn more about readings and their 30-day writing classes