Perfectionism - Recovered 980
Release Date: 03/13/2019
We have taken the very difficult moral inventory and admitted to our wrongdoings to ourselves, our higher power and to another human being. It’s now time to remove those wrongdoings from our everyday lives and we need help to ensure that we completely remove our shortcomings and don’t continue to fall victim to any of addiction’s ill effects.info_outline Step 6 - Recovered 1109
The sixth step can bring about significant and very noticeable change when it comes to the thought patterns and behavior that have been with us for a long time. It doesn’t happen overnight obviously, and there is nothing like perfection when working the twelve steps of AA. It’s about making a commitment and being content with patient improvement.info_outline Step 5 - Recovered 1107
Step Four has prepared you for step five, and by finding the courage to overcome that fear of rejection or the shame of your inventory, you experience honesty on a deeper level than in your first step of admission, and you break the pattern of denial that often plagues those suffering with alcoholism.info_outline Step 4 - Recovered 1105
While working on our step inventories we get a new perspective on the bigger picture, on patterns, selfishness, our responsibility in situations and in this process we are building up an accurate self-appraisal with true self-worth as the reward.info_outline Step 3 - Recovered 1103
When working on step three we take a look at how acting on self-will means behaving with the exclusion of any consideration for others, focusing only on what we want and ignoring the needs and feelings of others. While we were busy pursuing these impulses, we mostly left a path of destruction behind us, and we definitely lost touch with our conscience and a Higher Power.info_outline Step 2 - Recovered 1101
This is the beginning of the end, in a way. You will end your old life and begin your fresh one, committed to faith – faith in whatever you choose.info_outline Step 1 - Recovered 1099
The first step in 12 step recovery programs involves more than just admitting that there is a problem. It means breaking through the denial that has kept the person locked in their misery. The individual has to accept that they have been beaten by their addiction. The exact wording of this step is:info_outline Having Hobbies in Recovery - Recovered 1098
If people feel that their life has no meaning and purpose they will find it impossible to build a successful life in recovery. During their years of addiction the focus would have been on obtaining and using their drug of choice. It is therefore vital that they replace this hole in their life with something new. The more meaning that people find in recovery the less likely it will be that they will relapse.info_outline Relapse and Coming Back In - Recovered 1097
Relapse is not uncommon. Some people find it difficult to overcome their addictive behaviors for the long term. Once clean, the addict can easily fall back into old practices and habits. Recovery requires commitment, discipline and a network of support. The old adage “it takes a village” is clearly demonstrated in recovery. But those of us who have relapsed, coming back into the village of recovery can be difficult.info_outline Character Defects - Recovered 1096
Humans are obviously not perfect; everyone will have their flaws and weaknesses. It is only when these imperfections lead to suffering that there is a real cause for concern. Most people will have many minor character defects, and a few major ones. It will be these major flaws that will cause them the most problems in life.info_outline
Perfectionists hold themselves to rigid standards. This often inhibits healthy behaviors resulting in no action because of fear that they’ll mess up. It’s not surprising that perfectionists often procrastinate. Perfectionists might also impose their rigid standards on others and character defects such as anger results when these individuals don’t measure up.
It is not surprising that perfectionists often suffer from anxiety, depression, and eating disorders. Moreover, those who have perfectionistic tendencies often struggle with balance, acceptance, self-care, and self-compassion ...the list can go on.
Perfectionism and substance use often go together. Perfectionism can also make recovery much harder, since as with other things, perfectionists typically expect too much too soon and are unforgiving of their own mistakes. Perfectionism is a difficult problem to overcome, but with persistent effort, you can loosen its grip on you.
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What comes first to mind? Where do you want to start?
What does perfectionism mean to you?
Have you suffered from being a perfectionist? How?
How did you learn this behavior? Was this learned behavior?
Has perfectionism ever “worked” for you?
How did perfectionism hinder your early recovery?
How does it affect you today?
Perfectionists have unrealistic goals and standards.
How do you know if your goals or standards are unrealistic?
How does being competitive effect this condition?
Perfectionists usually have an all or nothing attitude.
How can his hinder recovery?
Surrender to win
Must admit total defeat to take step 1
We asked our listeners about this topic.
"Are you a perfectionist?”
Did you take the survey?
What would be your answer?
Have you suffered at the hand of a perfectionist? How?
How do you cope?
In our text on page 60 right after the 12 steps appear, we read…
Many of us exclaimed, "What an order! I can't go through with it." Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.
What does “perfect adherence to these principles” mean to you?
What does the slogan “progress not perfection” mean to you?
What program principle do you fail at?
How do you make progress in this area?
How do you deal with failure in recovery?
Give an example of a failure you had in recovery.
How did you cope?
What did you earn?
How do you know when your recovery standards have moved from admirable to unrealistic?
What is the underlying character defect when you suffer from perfectionism?