Perfectionism - Recovered 980
Release Date: 03/13/2019
Milt L. from Cleveland, OH speaking on "Dumb Guy Approach to the 12 Steps" in San Diego, CA - June 21st 1997info_outline Dumb Guy Approach to the 12 Steps Part 2 - Recovered 1190
Milt L. from Cleveland, OH speaking on "Dumb Guy Approach to the 12 Steps" in San Diego, CA - June 21st 1997info_outline Popsicle Sticks - Recovered 1188
I first experienced “Popsicle Sticks” at the Thursday Midnight night meeting at the Northwest Alano Club in Wayne Michigan. At first I hated it, then I got used to it, then it became my favorite meeting.info_outline Self Care - Recovered 1187
Self-care looks different for everyone, and that’s okay.info_outline Loneliness - Recovered 1186
It is no more cowardly to use help in recovering from a drinking problem, than it is, to use a crutch if you have a broken leg. A crutch is a beautiful thing, to those who need it.info_outline First Things First - Recovered 1185
The rhythm of our own special routine has a soothing effect, and an apt principle around which to organize some orderliness is—yes, “First Things First.”info_outline Getting Rest - Recovered 1183
For at least three reasons, people who drink heavily often cannotinfo_outline Serenity Prayer - Recovered 1181
Serenity is like a gyroscope that lets us keep our balance no matter what turbulence swirls around us. And that is a state of mind worth aiming for.info_outline Smartphone Therapy - Recovered 1179
When we stopped drinking, we were told repeatedly to get A.A. people’s telephone numbers, and instead of drinking, to phone or text these people.info_outline Changing Routines - Recovered 1177
Some of us insist that it was never the availability of the beverage that led us to drink, any more than the immediate unavailability kept us from that drink we really wanted. We live in a drinking society and we cannot avoid the presence of alcoholic beverages forever.info_outline
Perfectionists hold themselves to rigid standards. This often inhibits healthy behaviors resulting in no action because of fear that they’ll mess up. It’s not surprising that perfectionists often procrastinate. Perfectionists might also impose their rigid standards on others and character defects such as anger results when these individuals don’t measure up.
It is not surprising that perfectionists often suffer from anxiety, depression, and eating disorders. Moreover, those who have perfectionistic tendencies often struggle with balance, acceptance, self-care, and self-compassion ...the list can go on.
Perfectionism and substance use often go together. Perfectionism can also make recovery much harder, since as with other things, perfectionists typically expect too much too soon and are unforgiving of their own mistakes. Perfectionism is a difficult problem to overcome, but with persistent effort, you can loosen its grip on you.
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What comes first to mind? Where do you want to start?
What does perfectionism mean to you?
Have you suffered from being a perfectionist? How?
How did you learn this behavior? Was this learned behavior?
Has perfectionism ever “worked” for you?
How did perfectionism hinder your early recovery?
How does it affect you today?
Perfectionists have unrealistic goals and standards.
How do you know if your goals or standards are unrealistic?
How does being competitive effect this condition?
Perfectionists usually have an all or nothing attitude.
How can his hinder recovery?
Surrender to win
Must admit total defeat to take step 1
We asked our listeners about this topic.
"Are you a perfectionist?”
Did you take the survey?
What would be your answer?
Have you suffered at the hand of a perfectionist? How?
How do you cope?
In our text on page 60 right after the 12 steps appear, we read…
Many of us exclaimed, "What an order! I can't go through with it." Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.
What does “perfect adherence to these principles” mean to you?
What does the slogan “progress not perfection” mean to you?
What program principle do you fail at?
How do you make progress in this area?
How do you deal with failure in recovery?
Give an example of a failure you had in recovery.
How did you cope?
What did you earn?
How do you know when your recovery standards have moved from admirable to unrealistic?
What is the underlying character defect when you suffer from perfectionism?