Road Trips and Sex Without Shame
Good Girls Talk About Sex
In this Pop Culture Pillow Talk, I talk with pop culture critic Kristen Meinzer about two great movies: Joy Ride Plan B You can find Kristen at: Become a client: Support the show: Full show notes:
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Bonus quickie
Good Girls Talk About Sex
Plan B - Joy Ride - Become a client: Apply for a free coaching session: Support the show:
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Find the red flags! - Coaching Sophilia
Good Girls Talk About Sex
In this coaching episode, Sophilia asks: why does she keep ending up in relationships where things don’t feel right, and the entire weight of making it better falls on her? Leah works with Sophilia to: understand the red flags for this type of relationship, the communication skills that will help screen them out, rethink her own experience of being turned on. Sophilia is a 39-year-old, cisgender woman. She describes herself as queer, single, and multi-racial with a white mother and Black father. In the past she’s been in monogamous relationships, but currently prefers the idea of being...
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When the man teaching consent is the one violating you
Good Girls Talk About Sex
Last year I found myself in the middle of a shitstorm for daring to expose a community leader's abusive behavior. Today I tell the whole story. The backlash was immediate and intense, with DARVO (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender) tactics used to paint me as the problem. Suddenly, I was not just standing as a representative of this man’s abuse, but also receiving harassment and ostracization from those I once considered my community. Sharing this story isn't just about telling you what’s going on; it's about shining a light on the dark corners of abuse and systemic failure....
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Pop Culture Pillow Talk: Starstruck on HBO
Good Girls Talk About Sex
What happens when your brain is so busy it can't slow down to enjoy having sexy time with the cute guy who's totally into you? In today's episode, we break down the first two episodes of the HBO show Starstruck with teen sex and relationship educator Julia Sheldon (who also happens to be Leah's dear friend.) We focus on lead character Jessie and how overthinking gets in the way of being present. Upcoming Beyond Permission class schedule: Thursday, Feb. 22 - Embracing your inner MILF with Danielle Tuesday, Feb. 27 - Dating at midlife with Leah Tuesday, March 5 - Sex toys show & tell...
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Having the best sex of my life at 63 - Debbie
Good Girls Talk About Sex
In this coaching/storytelling episode, Debbie talks about having the best sex of her life at age 63. Her question: Is that usual? While Debbie has always been multi-orgasmic, now she's having dozens of orgasms in a single sex session. And the connection with her new husband is a big part of the reason. Debbie is a 63 year old cisgender woman. She describes herself as white, heterosexual, monogamous, married. She describes her body as slender and athletic. And don't forget: the BEYOND PERMISSION workshop starts next week! Use coupon code "beyond20" to join us! BEYOND PERMISSION workshop...
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Why don't you want to have sex with me?
Good Girls Talk About Sex
Togetherness is an HBO show that explores the challenges of maintaining a healthy and active sex life in a long-term relationship with small children. In today's episode, Danielle Silverstein from the popular Marriage and Martinis podcast joins Leah to discuss the first two episodes of the show. They dive into the complexities of sexual fulfillment, gender roles, expectations and resentments. Join us for a deep, thought-provoking, and insightful conversation about challenges of maintaining intimacy in a long-term relationship. BEYOND PERMISSION workshop (use code "beyond20" for $20 off...
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Navigating the sex talk demons
Good Girls Talk About Sex
Leah joins Danielle of Marriage & Martinis to talk about why Danielle's conversation with her husband about intimacy and pleasure was explosive and chaotic. Leah breaks down what we need to remember during these very tough conversations: we’ve been conditioned differently from the time we’re very young, and are often simply adhering to the roles we’ve been instructed to fulfill. They talk about why we can’t always trust our bodies’ physical responses during intimacy, games that can be played in lieu of telling our partner, “we’re not satisfied” as means to get a...
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I wish they would SLOW DOWN - Coaching Maria
Good Girls Talk About Sex
In this coaching episode, Maria asks the age old question: why is it so hard to ask for what I want?! She's convinced that her problem is in poor communication skills, but it doesn't take long to discover that the issue lies in a complete different area. Leah works with Maria to: understand how gender dynamics are creating friction in the "what do you want?" conversation, rethink how her definition of "sex" makes asking so difficult, practice the way she'd like to initiate a conversation about sex with potential partners. Maria is a 27-year-old cisgender woman. She describes herself as...
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Leah faces an identity crisis
Good Girls Talk About Sex
Leah delves into a deeply personal topic: how trauma and mental health have impacted her ability to show up authentically. She talks about the impact her demanding, charismatic father had on her psyche and sense of safety. In admitting her fear of being viewed as not good enough or too much like their father, Leah discusses the creation of a performative persona and the desire to shift to a more authentic voice. Who Is Your Sex & Relationship Alter Ego? Work with Leah: Apply for a free coaching session: Support the show: Full show notes:
info_outlineTammy is a listener-turned-guest who takes us into her American Jewish culture and shares how that shaped her early experiences around sex and marriage, and led her into situations that were unhealthy and downright dangerous. She dedicated herself repeatedly to making a better life for herself and her children—a life that hopefully includes serious sexual satisfaction and positive role-modeling for her children.
Tammy is a 33-year-old cisgender female who describes herself as white, Jewish, and has two kids. She and her husband are married by Jewish law but not legally. She is currently monogamous, but may be open to exploring other options in the future. She describes her body as an hourglass figure with a few extra pounds.
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Bookmark moments:
- 3:20 - Tammy shares her first memory of sexual desire, playing with the showerhead at around age 11-12 and finding her mother’s vibrator. She did not witness affection between her parents.
- 6:50 - She talks about how growing up in a Jewish family impacted her views on sexuality.
- 10:18 - Tammy decides to leave school and get her GED to get out from under her controlling mother. She goes to live with her grandparents who aren’t much better, and she turns to Yahoo groups to get access to dating and boys. You guessed it: catfish.
- 17:00 - She gives in and sees the guy, then goes into a panic when she realizes how in over her head she is. The incident turns into a memory blackout.
- 19:18 - Tammy talks about her first husband, and how her community taught (or not) young virgin wives about sex and its place within Jewish law.
- 27:18 - She opens up about the first time her husband displayed violent tendencies, and she chose to leave with her infant daughter.
- 31:35 - She tries to find her way into more mainstream culture for dating. She meets a guy she knows is wrong. A honeymoon in Vegas ends in annulment and another baby.
- 40:00 - Tammy talks about dating while pregnant, and then as a young mother.
- 47:30 - Tammy meets someone different, and she gets her first taste of bad boy attraction. It ends, and she finds herself running a divorcee dating network. She meets someone different again, this time “nerdy.” He seems like a good guy and they get engaged, but there’s a porn addiction.
- 55:30 - They both start 12-step meetings. Leah talks about porn use vs porn addiction.
- 1:02:00 - Tammy shares how her body image was negatively impacted by the porn, how her withdrawal and her husband’s waning interest stalled their sex life, and how he failed to stay off porn.
- 1:09:44 - She started listening to this podcast and thinking maybe there could be more, her hopes for the future, and how she wants to raise her kids to be open and have positive models.
- 1:17:15 – The Lowdown - Tammy answers questions about sex on her period, partners, toys, positions, clit stimulation vs penetration, achieving and/or faking orgasm, touch, building up pleasure, older men, masturbation, hair vs bare, 3-ways, blowjobs, receiving oral, smell and taste, breast play, ass play, dirty talk, laughter, confusing sexual urges, body parts, fantasies, and more.
Resources:
Tracy’s Dog – Tammy’s favorite toy! https://www.tracysdog.com/collections/best-sellers/products/2-in-1-g-spot-vibrator-with-clitoral-sucking
Co-Dependents Anonymous (CoDA) - https://coda.org
Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families (ACoA) - https://adultchildren.org
Creating this show isn't free, so if you’d like to support the work I do, I am grateful for your contributions at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex.
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EPISODE CREDITS:
Host / Producer – Leah Carey (email)
Audio Editor – Gretchen Kilby
Administrative Support - Lara O'Connor, Maria Franco
Transcript creation – Jan Acielo
Music – Nazar Rybak