Furious and Fast with Chris Van Vliet

 

Media personality Chris Van Vliet shares the story of how Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson almost got him fired on live TV, and Josh’s new game will give you flashbacks to your childhood…they might be weird flashbacks.

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AUTOMATIC TRANSCRIPTION
WILL CONTAIN COPIOUS TYPOS AND MISIDENTIFICATIONS.
IT'S BASICALLY USELESS YOU SHOULD JUST LISTEN

Kory: Welcome to theme park pulse, the game, the game show for theme park fans. I'm your host Corey in San Francisco, California. And I'll introduce you to the rest of the panel in just a second. If you'd like to be a contestant email, Nikki with two [email protected] or call [phone]. And leave a message.

If you love this podcast, the next logical step in your fandom is to join us on Patrion, where for as little as a dollar a month, you'd help us cover some of the costs associated with this podcast. And you'll pick up several pieces of bonus audio each week. More information at the link in the description.

This week media personality, Chris van fleet tries to re-imagine a Disney attraction based on a guy who flicked him off on television. That story. Plus Christie Brown, a former Disney cast member turned author plays, mucked up musicals up first. It's the Park's pop culture pop quiz. If you'd like to play theme park, post the game.

Call [phone]. And leave a message or email Nikki with two [email protected]. Let's welcome. Our contestant on theme park pulse, the game from Orlando, Florida. It's Christy Brown. Hey Christie. How are you guys? 

Christy: Thanks for 

Kory: having me. It's good to see you. Thank you for joining us this week. And just a minute, I'm going to test your Park's knowledge with the Park's pop culture pop quiz.

But first I want to introduce you to our panel of lost toys. You know, now that one division is complete. He is back to obsessing over more important things like, you know, tick talk and star Wars and. His hair in Sacramento, California. It's Alby. Hey, yes, 

Sean: it's true. 

Josh: I've changed my hair color, I think three times already.

What 

Sean: is this color 

Kory: that we're 

Josh: looking at now? I mean, I got the Agatha purple up there, so it's kind of like a pink. 

Sean: Ish. 

Kory: It was Alberta all along, just the lab does in fact, you to reopen on April 1st, there is a pretty good chance that he will get there first for no other reason than simple geography and the energy of the young in San Diego, California.

It's Jackie boy. Hey Jack. 

Jacky Boy: I feel like probably being on the road with one arm driving is bad, but I will make it happen so I can be the first one in line. Wait, does 

Kory: that not, is that not totally healed up yet? That's just how it is 

Jacky Boy: now. This is reality. 

Kory: It's messy from Jackie Jack, Jack, Jack to Shawnee, just as many Shawn's in Greenville, South Carolina.

It's you guessed it, Sean. Hi. 

Sean: I feel like now I have to go with the most Southern sounding ridiculous accent I can possibly 

Kory: do as the personality and to finger point of an experience Disney cast member, but Disney frankly can not afford to pay for her Disney habit in Morgantown, West Virginia. It's Nicki Drake.

Hey Nikki. Hi. Welcome back everybody. And last, but certainly not least he lives in Denver, Colorado for now. That's a tease. And so is he it's Josh Taylor. Hey, Josh. 

Josh: I'm so much closer to being on the West coast. You don't know. 

Kory: Oh, but is the West coast ready for Josh? I hope so 

Josh: because I'm coming in strong 

Kory: Christie, you worked for Walt Disney world for the better part of 13 years.

What roles did you play while you worked for the County? 

Christy: I started with merchandising and then I spent the last 13 years with the Disney's very, to weddings team. What's 

Kory: a typical day, like in weddings. It is 

Christy: stressful and crazy, and it was so much fun. 

Kory: You still live there in the Orlando area with your family.

Give your family a shout out. Of course. 

Christy: Hi, Phillip Gus, Lila, and Jacoby. 

Kory: How did you meet your husband? I was a 

Christy: wedding intern back in 2007. They were doing a bridal shoot for the new David Tutera collection. I think I just fit the dress. So they asked if I would put on the dress and step into the role of a bride.

I met Phillip. He was the groom for the day and I said, hi, I'm your Bradford today in 2011, we got married. At the wedding 

Kory: pavilion at the 

Christy: wedding pavilion. Oh, that's so cool. I met him in a wedding gown and then 

Kory: theoretically married him in wa yeah. Since you left the Disney company, you've leaned a lot into writing something I'm getting into at this stage in my life.

What are you working on right now? 

Christy: I've got a book being published. It's being released July 1st. It's called a ring bear. And it's a book for anyone who's been asked to be a ring bearer in a wedding. 

Kory: Oh, so it's a ring bear. B E R. Yeah. Yes. The little boy 

Christy: thinks he has to be a ring bear. That's 

Kory: so cute. And where can people pre-order that book?

They can go to 

Christy: black Rose writing.com and look for a ring bearer. 

Kory: Can't wait to read it. All right, Christie, we're going to play the parks, pop culture, pop quiz. I'm going to ask you three questions about some recent parks news. And if you get two out of three, correct, we'll send you a glow in the dark theme park pulse wristband.

Okay. Okay, here we go. Question one. Walt Disney world recently gave us a first look at artist renderings for new rooms at Disney's Polynesian resort. Featuring a Pacific ocean inspired color palette inspired by witch film franchise. That's right. I actually love this remodel and this film so much that I do not have a bad joke for this.

You're welcome.

All right. Question two Orlando theme park fans got some exciting news when it was announced that universal is resuming construction on their new theme park called what? Oh, Epic 

Christy: universe, 

Kory: right? A universal fans are excitedly chomping at the bit for yet another gate while Disney's fans are busy, constructing gallows at Disney Springs over the cancellation of the magical express.

And Nikki is 

Jacky Boy: the 

Kory: lead 

Sean: construction worker. Alfred swinging a hammer. 

Kory: Last question. A touch of Disney is the name of the now completely sold out food festival, taking place where. In 

Josh: my tummy,

Kory: is that it? Disneyland? Yeah, Disney, California adventure. The tickets went really fast to the latest of course, is that the California theme parks will be allowed to reopen on April 1st with some restrictions. If it's anything like the bars here in California, you may get to ride pirates. So the Caribbean, but you'll be required to purchase one food item and one beverage in order to clear the state's COVID-19 standards, because reasons Alby, how did Kristi do on the Park's pop culture, pop quiz?

I think 

Josh: she needs to do my wedding at Epic universe Malanda style. So she got them all.

Kory: Christie, will you stick around and play some more games later in the show? This is so fun. Up next to media personality, Chris van fleet plays, elevator pitch on theme park, pulse, the game. Welcome back to theme park pulse. The game. Our guest is the host of the podcast insight with Chris van fleet and he has a wildly popular YouTube channel under his name.

Let's welcome to theme park, post the game, my friend and media personality, Chris van fleet. Welcome, 

Chris Van Vliet: man. Thank you so much. Good to see you. Good to hear you. All of the 

Kory: things it's been forever, where you and I first met in Cleveland, Ohio, many, many moons ago. That is not where you live now. And it's not where you're from.

How many places have you lived at this point are 

Chris Van Vliet: too many originally from Toronto, but then it was Toronto, Vancouver, Cleveland, Miami, Fort Lauderdale, Cincinnati. And now I live in Los Angeles. 

Kory: Well, welcome to California. Yeah. Thank 

Chris Van Vliet: you. Thank you. The weather is beautiful here, but I think, I think I'm done moving for a little while.

Kory: Canada. What would you say your awareness was of theme parks like at an early age. And did you go to Canada's Wonderland? 

Chris Van Vliet: Everyone went to Canada's Wonderland and then Canada's Wonderland became paramount. Canada's Wonderland when paramount. Yeah, paramount bought it. And then they renamed all the rides after their movies.

So I can't even remember what the original name was, but we would ride top gun and we would ride the Italian job like it. One day we showed up and all that, all the rides had brand new names. Cool. 

Kory: Were there any that were just bad? 

Chris Van Vliet: Like the names were bad or the rides were bad either. Italian job. That's so great.

Sean: Do you get to drive mini Coopers in a tunnel? Because if you don't then the right is garbage 

Chris Van Vliet: and it was very strange. There was the bat and I don't want to get too much off on a tangent here, but the bat was this rollercoaster that went forwards and then backwards. And the one for that was always like two hours long.

That's all I did. 

Christy: We're loops and 

Chris Van Vliet: stuff too, but it was the entire ride. And then backwards, the 

Josh: segment was not sponsored by 

Sean: paramount 

Kory: plus not at all. Chris, you host a podcast and a YouTube channel. What will we find if we look you up on YouTube and check out 

Chris Van Vliet: insight? Like, I'm just fascinated with the idea of like people that are like super successful.

There's a reason they got to be at that level. So my podcast is all about like reverse engineering. Like what are the habits and techniques that they have, so we can all apply them to our own lives. So some recent interviews are. Lots of wrestlers on big wrestling fan. As I know you guys are as well, but Freddie Prinze Jr.

Was on the show. Chris Kirkpatrick from end sync was on the show. I just interviewed Jeff Timmins from 98 degrees. Andrew Yang was on talking wrestling with me, which is so cool. It's been a lot of fun and like I've selfishly do the show so I can learn from these people and go, Oh, you do that thing. Well, I'm going to start doing that thing now.

Kory: Tell me about what you did to get the rock to flick you off on television. And why are you still alive? 

Christy: And he's now done it twice. He's probably 

Chris Van Vliet: out twice, but the first time he was on the red carpet for the ballers premier in Miami, when I was working in Miami and. The interview was supposed to happen at like seven ish.

And I was live on TV TV at our, now our seven 30 show at seven 38. And I'm like, Oh, perfect. We'll be able to do the interview with him. We'll like take a clip and I'll be able to throw to the clip, like live on TV. We talked to the rocker, right. Here's what he had to say. Well, as you guys know, red carpet stock are never on time.

So the rock starts walking down the red carpet, like super late. And, and I'm like, Oh my gosh, like, he's going to either be here. Like. Right before I'm on TV or right after I'm on TV. And then the rock is walking up and I'm, we're in a commercial break and we're like a minute away from me going live. And we start this interview and I'm like, Oh my God, like, what are we going to do?

We're we're in a commercial break. And my producers yelling in my ear. Whatever you do, keep him there. We need him there. Live on TV, watching this interview out as much as I can, like asking like just silly questions. Finally, we come back live and I'm like, rock. Just want to let you know, we're live right now on deco drive.

He's like, Oh, we're live. I could. Say anything I want and I'm like, ah, please, please do not. So I turned to the camera at the end of the interview. I go, let's have a people's eyebrow off, you know, where the rock raises the eyebrows. So we do that to the camera, as we're doing it to the camera, unbeknownst to me, he gives me the middle finger on live TV behind my head.

I didn't see this happen. So I turn around. Rock. Thank you so much. That's 

Christy: so great to talk 

Chris Van Vliet: to you. I turned back to the camera. Dairy is one of the biggest stars in the world. Can you believe we got the rock live on TV? And then as soon as the segment ended, my producer calls me and goes, yeah, the rock flipped you off.

I'm like, What they said. Yeah. We're not sure if we're going to get fined by the FCC. Now, why I spent the next couple of days, like wondering if we were going to get an FCC fine, which thankfully we did not make for a great viral moment. Then when I saw the rock at the Moana junket a few months later, I said, you know, the last time I saw you, we got in a lot of trouble.

Cause you. Flip me off on live TV. He goes, ah, you know what that means? And they gave me another one. So the rock just thinks I'm number one, I guess 

Kory: I feel like he's such a good guy though, that if you actually did get fined, you could throw a go-fund me on Twitter and he would take care of it. 

Chris Van Vliet: I'd hope.

So then that's the same guy who gave me the middle finger on live TV. So I don't know. 

Kory: All right, Chris, we've invited you here to play a game that Jackie boy invented where we're going to put your imagination. No. You're Imagineering all to the test. This is elevator pitch, Jack. 

Jacky Boy: Chris welcome to elevator pitch is, is a game of speed wits and armchair Imagineering.

Imagine walking into an elevator with our panelists and having to explain an idea before we hit the top floor. Okay, I'm going to give you a topic. It could be a holiday, a character, a movie, or a show, and you're going to imagine you're it into an attraction or refurb. Or an overlay. Now you'll have a moment or three to construct your magnificent proposition and then 45 seconds to pitch us your ideas.

You'll be competing against Nikki today. And the rest of us will get to vote on our favorite and the most haphazard way possible. And we'll get to that in a little bit. Please note also there's a small chance that I will steal your idea and one day make it a reality. When I become an Imagineer, I like this.

Okay. We all know that odd Topia Disneyland needs a good refreshing, as much as I love the little Honda robot, the appeal is lost just about the time you get your license and you actually get to experience LA traffic. So I figured we switched things up a bit. Chris, your friend, Mr. The rock was in a franchise of movies that has to do with fast cars.

That may be a little more interesting when it comes to a driving attraction. Now I know we already have fast and furious supercharged at universal, but just like Apple says. Think different. Okay. This week on elevator pitch, we're going to be reimagining OD Topia with the fast and furious

Kory: Dawn. 

Jacky Boy: Chris, you are our guest, so I will actually let you go second. Cause I feel like that's probably where you want to be. Anyway. Mickey, go first. Okay. Cool. All right, Nikki, you've got 45 seconds. You're walking into the elevator. Are you ready for it? As 

Nikki: ready as I'll ever be doors are closing. 

Jacky Boy: Let's go.

Nikki: Oh, my gosh. I just had an amazing idea because the most boring ride at Disney is  and then even in Disney world, they've got that silly, boring ride there to it. 

Jacky Boy: Nice. Okay. All right. Yeah. So. 

Nikki: I want to take all of the retired superstar, limo people and change them into the fast and the furious cast and throw them into October would be 

Christy: amazing.

Nikki: We need that little pep in the step and we can speed up the ride just a little bit, but not too much, but I also need the rock in here somewhere. Not only flipping us off, but taking a giant, like torpedo thingy and turning it around and blasting it backwards. And I ran out of time. I tried to stretch that beginning as long as 

Kory: you did 

Jacky Boy: it.

Very good job. Nikki, do you have a name for this attraction that you've created? 

Kory: Um, 

Sean: not so fast and mildly annoyed. 

Nikki: I'll take it. Thank 

Jacky Boy: you, Sean. All right, Chris, do you get the gist? Are you ready for it? Let's do it. Doors are closing. Here we go. 

Chris Van Vliet: I Topia is not only the worst ride there. It also has the worst name.

So first thing we're going to do is change the name of this guide is now going to be called furious and 

Christy: fast. And I think 

Chris Van Vliet: one of the biggest problems about this ride is it looks awful. Like these cars are so ugly, so we're gonna, we're going to throw some new cars in there. There's also nothing to do when you're in these cars.

It's not like if you turn left actually goes left. He was on this track. So we're going to put some stuff inside the car. Like there's gonna be some buttons in there. One of the buttons. If you push that button, it's going to fire off our 

Christy: torpedo and actual torpedo. 

Chris Van Vliet: Then the rock is going to jump in just like fast and furious six, I believe.

And the rock is going to shoot away with his bare hands because that's what the rock does.

Jacky Boy: I can't believe it. Now, the way that we're going to figure out a winner for this is my favorite part of this game. So. The rest of us here on the cast are all going to shout the name of the winner on the count of three, the most haphazard way possible. Okay, here we go. Three, two, one. . Oh, I'll be. Who do we got?

What do you think, Chris? 

Sean: Yes, you had me at  

Chris Van Vliet: and the actual Rockwell be there 

Kory: and Disney can afford to get him to not flick the camera's off. So it'll be good, Chris, will you hang out on the panel for a bit and play the eighth dwarf with us at the end of the show? Yeah. Welcome back to theme park pulse.

The game. If you'd like to be a contestant, call [phone] and leave a message or email Nikki in [email protected]. Let's welcome back to the show from Orlando, Florida. It's Kristy Brown. Hi Christie. Hi Christie. I hope you're wearing your ears Disney humor because you're here to play a game with Josh Taylor, cold mucked up musicals, Josh.

Josh: Disney songs are iconic. Even those who don't really care for Disney movies probably still know a handful of classic Disney tunes. So instead of asking you to just name a Disney song, cause that'd be too easy, I've taken these songs. I've run them through my machine and I've spit out something different.

No, no. This game I'm going to play three clips. You just have to name the Disney song. Get all three to win the catch here. All of these songs are now being played at an elementary school concert by a student named Jimmy with his musical record.

Christie. I hope you're ready for a concert. 

Sean: All right, Jimmy, 

Josh: give us your first song.

can you name Jimmy's tune? Do you want to build a 

Sean: snowman? 

Josh: You're in the ballpark. There it is frozen. It's let it go. Well, Jimmy, you got a better song for us.

Christy: Is it supercalifragilisticexpialidocious,

Sean: he's reading the lyrics and coming up with music instead of you can't fault, like a seven year old kid. I can I will. 

Christy: It's this a real child play? 

Kory: No, I think it's Josh. 

Sean: I 

Josh: heard that girls like musician, so I've been my recorder with me everywhere.

Christy: Is 

Nikki: that your recorder? Are you happy to see me? 

Sean: In 

Josh: fact, 

Sean: my recorder, maybe we'll give you one more song. Okay.

Christy: The bare necessities. 

Kory: Yeah, good job. The good news is that's not the standard by which we judge things. Jack Alvey. How did Christie do on mucked up musical 

Josh: Christie? Don't let your kids play that please, but you got them. All right. 

Sean: Oh, 

Kory: thanks. No, no, she got the first one. 

Christy: Yep. 

Sean: Like I said, you're a winner

Kory: and that's why LV is the scorekeeper. We'll wrap up the show with part guests behaving badly. The eighth dwarf is next on theme park, pulse, the game.

Before we wrap up the show this week, we're going to play another round of the eighth dwarf. And now you can grab your stylish eighth dwarf t-shirt at theme park, pulse.com. John, take it away. 

Sean: All right. So we all know that the seven dwarves were designed to represent specific behaviors, personality traits.

And at some point during any Disney trip, we're all likely to see or be sleepy, dopey, happy, or if you're meet with my students this past week, pretty grumpy, but every now and then we will witness people in the parks that we just can't categorize. And one of the seven different names, their behavior is so outrageous.

They fit into their own category that we like to call the eighth dwarf. Now the eighth door stories are all based in real life, but I usually embellish a little bit for traumatic effect. However, today's examples are going to be an exception with the behavior, actually running the gamut from dumb to disgusting.

I'm just going to go ahead and present them as they are and let them speak for themselves. Surprising no one there. Both pandemic related, suffice it to say it's been a long and exhausting year dealing with COVID-19. And unfortunately that's pretty much exactly how pandemics work. The virus doesn't actually care if you're tired of the imposition on normal life or that you might be too stupid to understand how modern medicine works, the latter of which.

Definitely seems to include Kelly, a resident of Louisiana, according to the police report, who recently decided that getting his temperature checked in order to access private property was some kind of violation of his rights. Not content to duck pass the temperature checks. Kelly apparently proceeded directly to the boathouse where he was found berating, a security manager, Kelly, who is a shining example of why variations in your genetic line are desirable, managed to get himself arrested and charged with a misdemeanor of trespass on property.

All of this occurred on February 13th. So in honor of that, I wrote a Valentine's adjacent poem just for Kelly. Roses are red. Welcome to jail. That trip was expensive because you had to post bail. Yeah. Very good shot. Corey, what do we call Kelly? If he was the eighth 

Kory: auntie Maskey 

Sean: legacy. 

Josh: Passholder.

Sean: Probably probably a good one. Probably. Yeah. Jack, 

Jacky Boy: I'm going with Trumpy on this one.

You're not wrong, 

Nikki: right? Because it has to do with his temperature fiery. 

Sean: Oh, yeah. 

Josh: I mean, this is clearly Texas governor Greg Abbott. 

Sean: Hey guys. Again, Josh has gone from throwing other podcasts under the bus to politicians. Oh yeah. I'll keep going up this 

Kory: ladder. That's fine. 

Chris Van Vliet: We support you. How about, because Kelly went directly to jail, it will take something out of like the monopoly playbook this'll be, do not pass, go

Sean: and Christie that guy.

I don't want to be that former employee of Disney, you know, plenty of that guy. Sadly. I think we're going to go with, do not pass. Go eat. So I don't actually know this person's name, but the police report said it was a middle aged man wearing a fedora. Usually I would just refer to that dude as a tool, but let's go with that.

Seriously. It's totally acceptable to wear a fedora. If you're in your sixties or a former member of the rat pack, like most of us, Chad is apparently really tired of wearing a mask or he's parked camel. One of those things is understandable. The other would explain a lot, like for instance, his pension for spitting on people, according to the Orlando Sentinel, a security guard at Disney's contemporary resort reminded Chad to put on his mask before entering the resort in response, Chad, spat on the guard and ran into the elevator screaming.

I'm a guest. Which honestly sounds exactly like something I'd expect from a tool in a fedora walking, although I'm not sure about him being middle-aged because speaking as a middle-aged man, there's no way in hell I'm running to an elevator or anything else, except maybe a chiro cart. I'm thinking this guy has to maybe be in his late twenties or that I'm in denial about being older than middle-aged.

Because I like the last one so much. I decided to go ahead and write a poem for Chad as well. Roses are red. No one likes the foot. Dora. I wouldn't cry. If you were eaten by a banshee from Pandora, Corey, what is Chad's eighth dwarf 

Kory: name? Lougie

Sean: lb 

Josh: Cecil hotel guest E Oh, 

Sean: probably. Oh, Jack drew Carey. 

Christy: Why because he's wearing 

Jacky Boy: Dora and superstar limo. I feel like maybe too much explanation on that one probably should have gone with something else. You think also 

Kory: why, why is Josh offended?

Sean: Uh, barely drew carries the line for Josh. I'm trying to go up the 

Josh: ladder. Like I don't need to fall back down the level. 

Kory: Oh 

Sean: wow. Oh, Nikki 

Nikki: IDG, a F 

Christy: E.

Sean: All right, Josh. Who's on the bus this time. 

Josh: Vanity. 

Christy: Oh, I was like, who's that?

Josh: the bus 

Christy: every day.

Kory: I really thought you were 

Nikki: going to say Ted Cruz 

Sean: in Mexico couldn't have been him, anyone to SeaPak 

Chris Van Vliet: literally anyone. I liked it. The fedora was so important to the story that it was written into the police. That is right. 

Josh: That's not an embellishment. It was in this story, 

Chris Van Vliet: but like, have you ever seen a police report was like, well, the man was wearing like a flannel shirt.

It doesn't matter what he's wearing, 

Kory: unless it's a fedora. Is it matters 

Chris Van Vliet: since most of us are wrestling fans here, I'm going to harken back. To Randy or in his legend killer days, he would spit in the face of the legends before beating them up. This is legend killer. 

Kory: I feel like that would go right to this guy's ego though.

Dora 

Sean: the fedora standing there, go home Dubbo. All right, Christie, bring us home. 

Christy: Well, if he's wearing a fedora, he's gotta be douche-y.

Sean: Christie. You just cut to the heart like that. 

Kory: Christy and Chris, thank you so much for joining us something park, posted the game. Oh, thank you. Thank you so 

Jacky Boy: much. The bipolar as the game was created, written and produced by the panelists you heard on the show today, 

Sean: Corey Alby, Nikki, Jack, Sean, 

Kory: and Chad.

We'd like to thank our special guest Chris van fleet of insight with Chris van fleet. And of course our guest Christie. They're in Orlando and 

Nikki: all new episode of the doom squirrel drops tomorrow on our Patrion. That show is weekly and at 

Kory: all tiers 

Josh: assemble each Tuesday. Where right now we're going into a deep dive on Falcon and the winter soldier.

Check out the link in the description and support our work for as little as $1 a month. And you'll get that and some other 

Sean: cool bonuses. We'd also love to see you for trivia Tuesday on the theme park, pulse Twitch and Facebook live that's at 5:00 PM, West 8:00 PM East every Tuesday night. 

Josh: The single most important thing that you can do to help us out is share theme park posts the game with 

Sean: all 

Kory: of your friends.

Like all of them, maybe, actually don't, I'll be we'll know. Yeah. From our family to yours, wear a mask or however many it is. They want you to wear this week, wash your hands, keep your eyes on the road and join us next time for another all new theme park pulse. 

Sean: Yay. Oh, the game. 

Josh: Sorry. No one likes your content, Jimmy.