#32 How To Have Judgment Without Being Judgmental
Hi, Fam!
In a world where the mere mention of judgment can spark controversy and shame, it's easy to lose sight of its essential role in our lives. There's a crucial difference between being judgmental and exercising sound judgment, yet the fear of judgment has led many to forsake their ability to discern, blurring the lines between criticism and discernment. Join us as we navigate this delicate balance, uncovering why it's vital not to shy away from judgment but instead to embrace it as a cornerstone of wisdom. And perhaps most importantly, why giving the gift of good...
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#31 Embracing the Uncomfortable: Understanding the Role of Judgment, Guilt, and Shame
Hi, Fam!
We've all experienced it—the gut-wrenching guilt, the overwhelming shame, the moments where we've passed judgment on others. Not the most pleasant feeling... Maybe that's why in today's world, there's a prevailing notion that these emotions should be erased from our vocabulary and emotional palette. But is this truly the best approach to raising our children and fostering healthy relationships? Join us on an eye-opening journey to challenge these societal norms that try to stop us from feeling these feelings and delve into the complexities of judgment, guilt, and shame. Learn why these...
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#30 Authentic Parenting: Beyond the Rulebook
Hi, Fam!
Ever found yourself meticulously following every parenting guideline to a t, only to feel like something crucial is missing? In this episode, we confront the uncomfortable truth about scripted responses and emotionless reactions and how they may be stifling genuine connections with our children. If you feel that the rules of gentle parenting are just not getting you anywhere - this might be an eye-opening truth as to what might be missing. Even more importantly how, unknowingly, you could have fallen into the traps of Robotic Parenting. Tune in and learn what Robotic Parenting...
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#29 Raising Resilient Kids: Should I Follow My Child's Lead?
Hi, Fam!
Ever wondered why today's kids seem less ready for adulting? This episode spills the beans on the real struggles – less independence, job hesitations, a bouquet of disorders, and major "not ready" vibes. Discover what's really going on with our young generation as we dissect the impact of excessive screen time, casual relationships, and the effects of super laid-back parenting. Brace yourself: it's a recipe for stress, anxiety, and more. But hey, no need to panic! We've got a solid game plan to prep your kids for success in the adulting game. Find out how setting boundaries, sharing values,...
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#28 Couples Therapy: Why It Isn't Always the Answer to Save Your Marriage
Hi, Fam!
"Have you tried couples therapy?" - that's the one and really ONLY solution that married couples are handed when they are on the brink of going their separate ways. And then... Many come to find that it's actualy not working, or working only for as long as you're going. What about the ones who can't even afford therapy? OR that partner who is frankly refusing to go. What choices are you left with then? Stay in missery or leave and break the family? There has to be a better way, and there is! In this episode, let's dive deep into the terittory of why therapy might be doing your relationship...
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#27 Your Relationship Shapes Your Child's Behavior
Hi, Fam!
What happens when peaceful parenting unintentionally takes a toll on your relationship? In this episode, we're unraveling the paradox of practicing zen parenting while forgetting to extend the same grace to our partners. It's not about the tools of peaceful parenting causing the turmoil; it's about the pitfalls of neglecting peaceful partnering too. What are those double standards that may be unknowingly sabotaging your efforts? Discover why your kid might be echoing negative behaviors, and how the example we set in our partnerships becomes the blueprint for their future interactions....
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#26 Feminism's Consequences on Your Marriage
Hi, Fam!
Feminism has contributed significantly to the world, bringing forth numerous benefits. Over the years, it has evolved into a complex and multifaceted movement. Alongside its positive impacts, however, some drawbacks have subtly infiltrated our subconscious. These factors now influence not only how women perceive men and themselves but also impact our relationships. It is crucial to acknowledge these aspects so we can build stronger families and marriages. If you're seeking a fulfilling connection and are curious about the silent forces shaping your perceptions of your partner - join us in...
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#25 Trade-Offs: Sleep, School, Screens & Sugar
Hi, Fam!
Sleep experts, parenting gurus, and influencers will come out with dramatic, dogmatic, and sometimes even fanatic statements, like "Never ____" or "The choice to ______ is akin to abuse". But these types of statements encourage a delusion in us parents: that there is ONE right, true and perfect way to parent. That there are whole and complete solutions to our queries and all we have to do is to keep swiping left until we find them. In this episode, I break down why Thomas Sowell was so, so right when he said: "There are no solutions, only tradeoffs." and I encourage you to take a more nuances,...
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#24 How to Raise Resilient Kids (Even When I Don't Feel Resilient Myself)
Hi, Fam!
One of the most common questions I get asked by parents around the world is: "How can I give my child something I, myself, don't have?" We all want to give the best to our children - to "level up" from generation to generation. But then we're faced with the reality that it's very hard to give something that we feel we lack! So, whether it's about body image, communication skills, health, or confidence - this episode will give you the framework to develop essential life skills in your child and impart the priceless asset of a strong mindset. ~ Want to develop true resilience? Become...
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#23 Strength Over Safety: Raising Courageous Kids in an Unsafe World
Hi, Fam!
It might be hard to imagine, but the emphasis on "safety" as one of the main goals for parents, was not always the prevailing value that humans sought after. Today, there's an acute obsession with physical and emotional safety. Caution signs and buzzwords like "safe space" and "trigger warnings" permeate societal circles. But "safetyism" actually leads us all to be less safe. In this episode, I share 3 surprising ways in which a high emphasis on safety actually deteriorates resiliency and 3 strategies you can start practicing now to raise children who are strong - physically,...
info_outlineAre schools like prison? A human rights violation? Is forced education immoral and abusive? If so… what are the millions and millions of parents with school-going kids to do? If this concerns you, listen up.
You've heard the experts like Ken Robinson and Alfie Kohn weigh in that "schools kill creativity" or that "schools are feel bad education." In fact, schools have been compared to prison in that they limit children’s freedom and choices. In many cases they also do not give the education we want for our children, I know this is true in my case.
But I also know that what works for me does NOT work for everyone. If you are in a situation, whether it be financial, psychological, etc, in which homeschooling does not work for you, I’m here to reassure you that is ok too!
Often times we look at the negative aspects of the school system but we forget to look at the possible negative impact of switching to homeschooling if it’s not a good fit for the family. Switching to homeschooling could lead to a burnt out mom, stressed from trying to figure out how to replace her income now that she quit her job to homeschool and stressed about whether her child is keeping up or not and what activities she needs to plan. Is that really better for the kids in the long run?
Even if you have accepted your reality that homeschooling is not right for your family perhaps you still worry about the school available to you. Maybe the school focuses a lot on grades creating a very competitive environment. Or perhaps they have the homework “rule” of an hour per grade level. Or maybe it’s just the context of school in general - the “cool” kids and the potential materialism that could lead to or processed sugary foods being the only real foods available. Whatever it is that you are worrying about I’ll remind you why you need to let it go. You’re worrying does not serve anyone, especially your children, in-fact it may even be making their challenges in school more difficult.
Even if you’ve made your decision and feel completely comfortable in your choice you’ll still gain something from this episode, we even have an expert guest (spoiler alert: Dr. Shefali Tsabary!!) Here’s what you’ll hear:
[6:13] Schools are prisons (at least according to some people)
[15:24] Should my kids stay or go? 🤷♀️
[17:19] Does that serve your children? (or you?)
[18:15] Pause and take a breath before deciding 🧘♀️
[21:38] There’s always a cost 💰
[23:40] Get real
[24:26] Accept it
[26:04] Be fluid and flexible
[27:58] What would Dr. Shefali do? 💕
[30:41] We all need to calm the 🤬down
[31:54] You can bring the change you want to see!
[33:16] Hack the system!
At the end of the day you have to accept your reality. You need to find a way to work with whatever you cannot change.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
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Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/28