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97: Are You Contemplating Divorce Again?

The Remarried Life

Release Date: 07/02/2019

136: The Benefits of Gratitude in Your Blended Family show art 136: The Benefits of Gratitude in Your Blended Family

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about the art of being grateful in spite of our circumstances. Gratitude is beneficial in that there are so many benefits if you practice it regularly in the life of your blended family experience. Today we will talk about the benefits of being grateful in spite of some difficulty circumstances in a blended family and remarriage. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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135: Dealing With Anxiety When Direction is Unknown show art 135: Dealing With Anxiety When Direction is Unknown

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about the state we are in as a society in dealing with a virus that is spreading around the globe. This can be a time in your stepfamily where you all come together to support and encourage each other. Today we will talk through some simple tips to deal with the anxiety we are all experiencing. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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134: 5 Ways to Help Bio and Step Kids Reduce Fear and Worry show art 134: 5 Ways to Help Bio and Step Kids Reduce Fear and Worry

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about fear and worry especially in our children in the wake of a crisis at home or in society. In light of the virus that is spreading around the world and the resulting school cancellations, it can put uncertainty in the minds of our children. Let’s talk today about 5 ways that you can help them feel better in the midst of chaos. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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133: Having the Tough Conversations in Your Remarriage show art 133: Having the Tough Conversations in Your Remarriage

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks to Author and Counselor Megan Bottom about having the difficult conversations in your remarriage. Megan has written a new book called “Nana’s Pearls” which is a book written from a fictional perspective and offers all sorts of wisdom for tough discussions on blended family topics like boundaries, parenting, and sex and intimacy. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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132: How to Get Your Relationship Out of the Dry Place show art 132: How to Get Your Relationship Out of the Dry Place

The Remarried Life

Summary

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131: You Need These Three Types of Blended Family Couples In Your Life show art 131: You Need These Three Types of Blended Family Couples In Your Life

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about the blended family journey and the necessity of seeking out three other couples to walk alongside. Some have referred to having a Paul (a couple ahead of you), a Barnabus (a couple in the same generally area in life) and a Timothy (a couple just a few steps behind). If you can surround yourself with these three types of couples, you can live a more full and complete life. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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130: How to Change Your Mindset Toward Your Blended Family show art 130: How to Change Your Mindset Toward Your Blended Family

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about the one thing we have control over in our blended family. That one thing is how we view what is happening around us. We can choose to think certain ways, but we are going to challenge those thoughts today. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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129: Valentines Day Remarriage  Family Traditions show art 129: Valentines Day Remarriage Family Traditions

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talksin this episode about the Valentines Family traditions. Not only should Valentines Day celebrate each other as spouses but should incorporate the kids as well. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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128: Do You Have Voices In Your Head When Arguing With Your Spouse? show art 128: Do You Have Voices In Your Head When Arguing With Your Spouse?

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about how an increase in disagreements and arguing can often be a result of some voices from your childhood. Feeling like you don’t measure up to your spouse or that your spouse does not care often will be magnified because someone in your past either said these things or made you feel this way. We will talk about this and what to do about it. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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127: How to Have the Best Family Meeting show art 127: How to Have the Best Family Meeting

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about the dreaded family meeting. You have all kinds of chaos between your spouse, the ex-kids, the kids, and the stepkids. It probably feels like everyone is being pulled into many directions. Let’s talk about what to do and what not to do in a family meeting. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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More Episodes

Brian Mayer talks the difficult subject of thinking about divorce again.  It is very common to have these thoughts again in a subsequent marriage.  We will talk about this issue and some of the issues that could be a signal that you are beginning to walk down that path.  You have to make you own decision to be sure but this episode will hopefully help you to pause and process through this pretty significant issue.   We hope you enjoy today’s message.  For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

Today's Goodies

  • If you are divorced and remarried to someone else and have ever thought about divorce you are very normal.  This is a very common thought.  Of course the frequency of the thought along with the severity of the circumstances will certainly determine the likelihood this might actually happen. 
  • Fun fact about marriages and divorce, by a man by the name of Glynn Wolfe holds the record for most monogamous marriages in U.S. history at 29.  He even remarried 3 of the women he had previous divorced.  He probably also holds the record for most thoughts about divorce most likely although something we cannot verify. 
  • Now back to thoughts and actions that might be driving you toward divorce, but before that I must admit I have had thoughts about divorce in my second and current marriage.  These thoughts actually occurred maybe 1-2 years into my marriage.  Fortunately it was only said once and was in anger (not great but quickly determined there was no basis in reality for this. 
  • Now let’s talk a bit about the things you may have thought about or actually that could mean that you thoughts about divorce could have more substance. 
    • If you think about divorce when you are not emotional or angry.
    • You have discussed divorce with a close friend, family member, clergy or other professional. 
    • You have thoughts about what it might be like to be alone again at times when you are not angry.
    • You have researched divorce attorneys.   
    • You are hiding money or have set up a separate bank account. 
    • You currently have separate bank accounts and you are doing things with your money that you know your spouse may not approve. 
    • You have discussed specific plans for divorce with your spouse and have thought a lot about how and what you might say. 
    • You have had thoughts about how the kids would be shared and how time might be divided up. 
    • You have been separated with your current spouse in the past or currently. 
  • If you have thought or done these things above then for sure you are probably further along in your desire for divorce than simply just having a fleeting thought. 
  • Now do any of these mean that you are working toward divorce without potential for return, of course not.  You can always make a different choice. 
  • Remember though physical abuse is a much different animal and safety is the number one priority.  You must ensure you are safe first and all else takes a back seat. 
  • Other than physical abuse, you can work on the issue of thinking about divorce in a constructive manner with your spouse assuming of course they are looking to work for it as well. 
  • Just remember there is always hope and you can turn things around.  This happened for me when I had a brief thought about throwing in the towel on my second marriage.   

Resources:

  • None Mentioned Today

Thanks For Listening!

  • With so many things that take time in our lives, I more grateful than you know that you took time to listen to this podcast episode. 
  • If you liked this episode and believe that it would be beneficial to a friend, family member, or colleague, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.
  • The Remarried Life Facebook Group is a community of people just like you who get and give support.  Please join today!  ​

As always remember that marriage is not something you have, it is something you do.  Talk to you next week unless you are binge listening in the future in which case I will talk to you in about a minute!  Take care.