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117: Stepfamilies and Finances with Ron Deal, Greg Pettys, and David Edwards

The Remarried Life

Release Date: 11/19/2019

131: You Need These Three Types of Blended Family Couples In Your Life show art 131: You Need These Three Types of Blended Family Couples In Your Life

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about the blended family journey and the necessity of seeking out three other couples to walk alongside. Some have referred to having a Paul (a couple ahead of you), a Barnabus (a couple in the same generally area in life) and a Timothy (a couple just a few steps behind). If you can surround yourself with these three types of couples, you can live a more full and complete life. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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130: How to Change Your Mindset Toward Your Blended Family show art 130: How to Change Your Mindset Toward Your Blended Family

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about the one thing we have control over in our blended family. That one thing is how we view what is happening around us. We can choose to think certain ways, but we are going to challenge those thoughts today. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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129: Valentines Day Remarriage  Family Traditions show art 129: Valentines Day Remarriage Family Traditions

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talksin this episode about the Valentines Family traditions. Not only should Valentines Day celebrate each other as spouses but should incorporate the kids as well. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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128: Do You Have Voices In Your Head When Arguing With Your Spouse? show art 128: Do You Have Voices In Your Head When Arguing With Your Spouse?

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about how an increase in disagreements and arguing can often be a result of some voices from your childhood. Feeling like you don’t measure up to your spouse or that your spouse does not care often will be magnified because someone in your past either said these things or made you feel this way. We will talk about this and what to do about it. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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127: How to Have the Best Family Meeting show art 127: How to Have the Best Family Meeting

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about the dreaded family meeting. You have all kinds of chaos between your spouse, the ex-kids, the kids, and the stepkids. It probably feels like everyone is being pulled into many directions. Let’s talk about what to do and what not to do in a family meeting. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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126: Heap Burning Coals On Their Heads show art 126: Heap Burning Coals On Their Heads

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about being nice to your family including your stepkids even when you feel like they don’t deserve. Heap burning coals on their heads is a biblical reference to doing kind things for your enemies. The burning coals is supposed to awaken those that you are being nice to how to act differently toward you. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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125: When Your Ex-Spouse's Parenting Style is Different show art 125: When Your Ex-Spouse's Parenting Style is Different

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about what we have all been through and that’s dealing with an ex-spouse who runs a much different family dynamic or parenting style than you. Usually the differences center around the relationship with the children, rules like bedtimes, mealtimes, and homework. We will talk today about how to deal with this situation in the best way possible. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.c

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124: Reduce Screen Time in Your Stepfamily show art 124: Reduce Screen Time in Your Stepfamily

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer talks about how technology, screen time, and social media can secretly and silently destroy your connection with your stepfamily. We will talk about this and some strategies to reduce this as an issue. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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123: Stop Making Assumptions About Your Partner show art 123: Stop Making Assumptions About Your Partner

The Remarried Life

Summary Brian Mayer talks about how the human brain will filter something the eyes see and the ears hear into something that maybe is not really there.  It is called making assumptions.  When we see our spouse say or do something, we will often unknowingly ascribe meanings that may or may not be true.  We will talk about this and what to do instead.  We hope you enjoy today’s message.  For more information and additional resources please visit our website at Today's Goodies   We all know the old cliché about what assumptions do?  That make a “blank”...

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122: Stepfamily Development – Part 3 The Later Stage show art 122: Stepfamily Development – Part 3 The Later Stage

The Remarried Life

Brian Mayer over the next 3 weeks will be talking about the stages of stepfamily development. These stages were developed by Patricia Papernow, Ed.D. We will walk through the early stages in the first episode, the middle stages in the second episode, and the later stages in the third episode of this series. We hope you enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

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Summary
Brian Mayer talks to Ron Deal, Greg Pettys, and David Edwards about their new book called The Smart Stepfamily Guide to Financial Planning.  As we discuss all the time complications in blended families are a given.  Finances is a subject for blended families that is no different.  Today we have a great interview lined up with all 3 authors that we are excited to bring to you.  We hope you enjoy today’s message.  For more information and additional resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com

Today's Goodies

 

  • Ron Deal:  founder of Smart Stepfamilies, director of FamilyLife Blended for Family Life, author of many books for stepfamilies.  He is also a licensed marriage and family therapist and popular speaker
  • Greg Pettys has well over 30 years of experience with securities and life insurance and regularly speaks with Ron at his events
  • David Edwards is an estate planning and elder law attorney who also speaks at Ron’s Smart Stepfamily events. 
  • Here are the questions we will be tackling on today’s episode:
    • What inspired the three of you to team up to write a book for stepfamilies and financial planning? 
    • Trust is a big issue for couples in remarriage because of past hurts.  What would you say to a couple where one or both are very timid to want to even move forward with financial planning together because they have a fear of being hurt again?
    • Talk About the Groundwork Couples in Blended Families Should lay Before proceeding to Planning Including Values About Money (i.e. a spender versus a saver, money as security versus money as enjoyment, Dave Ramsey calls them Nerds versus Free Spirits etc).   
    • What is the “Togetherness Agreement” and Why is it Important
    • Discuss the importance of Merging and the Concept of the “Three Pots of Money”
    • What are a couple of the most common issues that come up with a former spouse when it comes to financial planning in a new family? 
    • What are the most important things to consider with financial planning when it comes to the kids in the blended family?
    • Let’s Talk About Retirement.  You Talk About a 5 Step Process.  What are some important concepts to consider in this process?
    • What else have we not covered that would be important for my listeners to know about stepfamilies and financial planning? 
    • What is the best way for listeners to pick up a copy of your book? 
    • Any other resources that either you or others have produced that would be helpful for the listeners? 

Resources:

Thanks For Listening!

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As always remember that marriage is not something you have, it is something you do.  Talk to you next week unless you are binge listening in the future in which case I will talk to you in about a minute!  Take care.