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025: The Toughest Job in America

You Were Made for This

Release Date: 05/01/2019

217: God Will Surprise Us show art 217: God Will Surprise Us

You Were Made for This

In the past dew episodes I’ve been talking about how I tracked down my birth father and met him for the first… and last time in my life. You’ll find links to those episodes at the bottom of the show notes. Today’s show concludes this painful chapter in my life by focusing on a larger relational and spiritual principle that applies to all of us. Namely, sometimes in our difficulties God will surprise us in unusual ways to remind us he is still working for our good and for his glory. But before we get into today’s episode, here’s what this podcast is all about.   Welcome to...

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216: Our Past Helps Us Understand Our Present show art 216: Our Past Helps Us Understand Our Present

You Were Made for This

Hello everyone. If you haven’t listened to episode 215, “Searching for my Birth Father,” I suggest listening to that episode before continuing with this one. Just go to . Today’s episode, #216, continues with the theme of how understanding our past helps us understand our present when we see how God began shaping us early on to find joy in being the person he created us to be. Before we get into this I need to tell you that Carol, our announcer and executive director on vacation this week. Filling in for her is the latest addition to our staff, our chaplain and family cat, Father...

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215: Searching for My Birth Father show art 215: Searching for My Birth Father

You Were Made for This

One of the more popular topics from past episodes has been the story of Gail Rohde who was adopted as an infant, and her search as an adult for her birth mother. Then several years after finding her, she searched for her birth father - and found him, too. I’ll have links to those episodes at the bottom of the show notes.  It can be a relational minefield in dealing with the dynamics of adoptees wanting to know where they’ve come from, especially when it’s been hidden from them. I have a similar story about searching for my birth father that I wrote about in my book, THEM. ...

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214: People Are Like Houses show art 214: People Are Like Houses

You Were Made for This

A listener once suggested that for a podcast episode I should read from the book I wrote in 2016, THEM- The Richer Life Found in Caring for Others. It’s about relationships, which of course, is what this podcast is about. But I don’t know if reading from it would interest many of you. Maybe the first chapter might, I don’t know. It’s about how people are like houses when it comes to deepening our relationships with others. But before we get into today’s episode, here’s what this podcast is all about.  Welcome to You Were Made for This If you find yourself wanting more from...

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213: Five Things to Watch for in Your Next Conversation show art 213: Five Things to Watch for in Your Next Conversation

You Were Made for This

One thing on my mind lately is a question about the meaningful conversations we sometimes have with friends, and what makes them different from other conversations. I started thinking about this while reading news articles about the Super Bowl played earlier this month. Meaningful conversations and the Super Bowl don’t quite seem to fit together, but they do in my mind.  Keep listening and I’ll explain the connection in today’s episode, number 213. Welcome to today’s episode Maybe they’ve always done this, I don’t know, but it seems that sports journalists lately are using a...

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212: Little Things We Do Matter the Most to People show art 212: Little Things We Do Matter the Most to People

You Were Made for This

The older I get the more I’ve come to appreciate how it’s the little things we do for people that matter most to them. Little things that come naturally for us because of how God uniquely made us, I’ve got a few stories for you today to illustrate this point. Stories that I hope will inspire you to bless others in ways that are easy and natural for you. But before we get into today’s episode, here’s what this podcast is all about.   Welcome to You Were Made for This If you find yourself wanting more from your relationships, you’ve come to the right place. Here you’ll...

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211: A Men’s Breakfast Like No Other show art 211: A Men’s Breakfast Like No Other

You Were Made for This

A men’s breakfast can be fun and still have a greater purpose than eating and conversation. When organized with a larger objective in mind it can be a great way to bless people and a means to live out the Gospel. Today’s episode is about my Men with Waffles breakfast and the impact it had on others not even in the room. Especially women. Breakfast with a friend  A few weeks ago my friend Randy was in town for the Christmas holiday. We used to go to the same church, but his job change meant a move to Pittsburgh. He and his wife are still closely connected with friends they have back in...

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210: Word of the Year for 2024 - Curious show art 210: Word of the Year for 2024 - Curious

You Were Made for This

CURIOUS. It’s my pick for the 2024 Word of the Year. Curious. It’s an important relational skill we need to help us deepen our relationships with others.  Today’s episode is about what happens when we’re not curious about people, and what we can do about it to strengthen our relational curiosity muscles that will enrich our relationships. But before we get into today’s episode, here’s what this podcast is all about.   Welcome to You Were Made for This If you find yourself wanting more from your relationships, you’ve come to the right place. Here you’ll discover...

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209: The Christmas Story In 2023 show art 209: The Christmas Story In 2023

You Were Made for This

When you get right down to it, the only thing that really matters in the Christmas story in 2023 is Jesus. No Santa, gifts, or Bing Crosby. Just Jesus. Here's the original story as recorded in Luke's Gospel, just as it happened. I am reading from The Message, by Eugene Peterson. Luke 2: 1-20 The Birth of Jesus  About that time Caesar Augustus ordered a census to be taken throughout the Empire. This was the first census when Quirinius was governor of Syria. Everyone had to travel to his own ancestral hometown to be accounted for. So Joseph went from the Galilean town of Nazareth up to...

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208: Christmas - A Time to Reflect show art 208: Christmas - A Time to Reflect

You Were Made for This

There are many cultural dimensions to all that is Christmas. Pick your favorite. I have a few that I look forward to every year. But as I get older, I’m seeing Christmas more as a great time to reflect on my relationship with Jesus. In Luke’s gospel, for example, I’m especially drawn to the mother of Jesus, Mary, and how she reflects upon the birth of her son and all that it means to her, both in the present and the future. There are things we can learn from Mary as she takes time to reflect on this most important event in all of history.  Welcome to You Were Made for This If you...

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More Episodes

No matter how difficult our job, there are ways to view our work and daily responsibilities that can bring out the best in us, and draw us closer to God. Listen in to learn how to be encouraged when our 9 - 5 activities are getting us down.

Our relationship with our work is one of the key relationships of life. How we view what we do to earn a living tells a lot about ourselves. Some of us are blessed to be in a career we absolutely love, while others are in jobs or activities during the day that are very unsatisfying and drain the life right out of us.

If the former is true for you, and you love what you do for 8 hours or more a day, listening to today’s episode may give you some insight into the people who are so different form you. It may give you some ideas to help them.

But if the later describes you, where your job or daytime activities are something you dread, and are anything but fulfilling, today’s episode may offer a new way of looking at things that could change your outlook. Either way, listen in. I’ll start with a story.

Our daughter and her family were in town recently for our grandson Nathan’s spring break. They came from their home in warm South Carolina to Wisconsin in April. It snowed the 2nd day they were here. They really do love us. How many people do you know who go north for spring break?

For those listeners in other parts of the world outside of Wisconsin, our state is just north of Illinois where you’ll find Chicago. Wisconsin is the only state in our nation with “sin” in its name. Wis-con-SIN. Maybe that’s why we get snow in April.

I live very near to the city of Milwaukee, which is about 75 miles north of Chicago, and is home to what I consider the most beautiful building in the entire state. The Milwaukee Art Museum, or what most people call it around here, simply The Calatrava. It’s named after the Spanish architect who designed a major addition to the museum, Santiago Calatrava. It was his first designed building in the US, shortly before his career skyrocketed with other beautiful structures all over the world.

Each day, beginning from the night before to 10am each morning, The Calatrava here in town looks like a large white sailing ship ready to launch eastward into Lake Michigan, just several hundred yards away from its western shore. Then at exactly 10am, what looked like two white sails of this ship, slowly separate and open on its north and south sides to transform this ship into a beautiful white bird. The sails become wings. It’s breathtaking to watch.

Later in the day, at 5pm, the two wings, gradually close to transform the bird back into the shape of a sailing vessel. It’s quite stunning. A true thing of beauty. The inside of this museum addition is just as beautiful. White marble floors and walls. Even the underground parking garage is all white, and it somehow lets in ambient light from outside into its cavern underground. The garage itself is worth visiting.

One day during our daughter’s visit we visited The Calatrava, walking through the rooms of a traveling art exhibit, looking at paintings. And reading the description about each one. It was very quiet and peaceful. At one point I saw two gray-haired women thoroughly engaged with one particular painting. The taller of the two pointing to an specific spot on the painting, and whispering to her companion who smiled and nodded. I wanted to eavesdrop, but I think they have rules against that kind of thing in art museums.

After looking at all the paintings, and wandering through the gift shop, we went downstairs to eat lunch in The Calatrava cafe. Our conversation started with how much we all liked the museum building itself, and then the paintings, and the people they depicted.

Our daughter Jennifer then commented, “I felt sorry for the guards watching over each area where paintings hung. That’s got to be a really hard and boring job.”

My thoughts exactly. Dressed in black pants, a cheap black suit coat, white shirt, black tie, black shoes, and black horned rim glasses. Watching to make sure no one stole any of these 6 x 8’ canvas paintings. Watching to make sure no one sprays paint on the 18th century-portraits, like someone did a few years ago on Michelangelo’s Pieta in St. Peter’s Basilica in the Rome.

The guard’s job is to look for manifestations of the worst of the human condition, and then to stop such expressions. Their job is to not trust people. All day long, do not trust people. 10am - 5pm, “My job is not to trust people, to be suspicious of human beings.” What a contrast to the beauty of the art and the building they were looking out for.

Daughter Jennifer’s observation reminded me of comment from a former pastor I talked to about four years ago. I was on the pastoral search team for our church and I made a call to this ex-pastor I knew, living out of state. I had spoken to him several years prior when he contacted me for help in dealing with a messy church situation. He had succeeded his father as pastor of a congregation of about 200. His father had served the church for over 30 years, and was dearly loved by the congregation. His son, not so much. Factions developed and he was beside himself in handling all the drama. He eventually resigned and found another ministry job, but not as a pastor.

Several years had past by the time I called him, and he was doing well in his new position, but I contacted him to see if he would be interested in getting back in the saddle again as a pastor of our 200+ member congregation. He heard me out as I explained our congregation’s need and what we were looking for. When I asked him if he would be interested in pursing this further, he said he’d have to think and pray about it for a few days, and then he concluded with a sentence I still find a bit haunting,

“I don’t know if I want to get back into the toughest job in America.”

I never called him back to follow up.

We have listeners in 25 countries around the globe who I’m sure could care less about the toughest job in America. You may be one of those listeners. But please hang around because today’s episode is not about America, nor about being a pastor. It’s about the human condition that sparked such a comment from my ex-pastor friend.

He went through a gut-wrenching mess at his last church, and my heart went out to him. He clearly was still quite raw from the experience several years back. But is being a pastor “the toughest job in America?” Really? I know what you’re thinking now, and I am thinking the same thing. But let’s extend a little grace to the guy.

His comment reflects several relationship dynamics at play in how we relate to what we do for a living, or how we spend our days making a contribution to our world.

Here’s dynamic #1. When we’ve been through a really tough job situation, where we’ve suffered a lot of hurt, frustration, and disappointment. It’s easy to blame other people, and the job itself, as the source of my problem, rather than to consider the possibility I was simply not a good match to handle the challenges of that situation. I didn’t have the skills or interest to meet those challenges. Rather than saying being a pastor is the toughest job in America, a more accurate statement would be “Being a pastor AT THAT CHURCH was the toughest job in the world FOR ME at THAT TIME IN MY LIFE.” There’s no joy in being in a job where our interests and skill set is not a fit for the job.

Another dynamic is that we tend to think the job we have is so unique and different to the jobs other people have, and that what we do is so much harder than what others do. The reality is: We are not nearly as unique as we think we are.

As a teacher right out of college, for example, I felt I accountable to my students, to their parents, to my principle, and to the school board. Way too many “bosses” to please. People just didn’t understand how difficult this is. No one has as many people to be accountable to as a teacher.

When I was a salesman, no one could appreciate how hard that was, either. No one else I knew was working on commission. No one else I knew had to deal with closing a sale from a pay phone while on vacation in a remote area of Wisconsin with one’s family. People just didn’t understand how difficult this is.

As a business owner, no one else I knew had to be concerned about meeting payroll. With having enough cash in the bank so employees could cash their paychecks. No one else I knew had to fire an employee. People just didn’t understand how difficult this is.

The reality is, other jobs are just as difficult as the ones I had, and many are much harder. And while the details may be different, other jobs had similar challenges. Mine were just not that unique. But we all tend to think they are.

It’s dangerous to compare the difficulty of our job with the difficulty of jobs other people have. To say my job is harder than your job is to compare and evaluate myself in comparison with another person. Don’t do that. It’s envy and it’s wrong. And it’s sin. It’s also prideful, for it presupposes one accurately knows how difficult someone else’s job is.

Dynamic #3 is that almost always, the job we have is the product of a choice we make. If our job is so distressing and hard, we need to quit and get another one. It may be difficult and scary to do this. There may be financial considerations. I might have to move across the country. But it’s all still a choice. No one is forcing anyone to have the job they have. We often think we don’t have a choice. But we most always do. We have more choices than we think. Accept responsibility for our own choices.

And the last dynamic is that every behavior has a payoff, a benefit to it, otherwise we wouldn’t engage in that behavior. If someone chooses to be a guard at an art museum, or a pastor, there’s a benefit to it. It may certainly not be something WE want, but for the people who engage in them, there’s a payoff. Maybe the payoff to the museum guard is part-time income in a stress-free environment, boring as it is, to pay off student-loan debt. Maybe the payoff to my ex-pastor friend was to please his pastor father, who wanted his legacy carried on by his son. I don’t know what the payoffs could be. I’m just speculating and wondering. What I do know for sure is every behavior has a payoff. The challenge is knowing what that payoff could be.

So what are we to do if we find ourselves in the Toughest Job in America? I have several ideas.

  1. Examine ourselves to better understand our gifts and talents, along with our limitations. To what extent can I reflect the image of God well in my current job, given how God has wired me?
  2. Re-assess the job we are in. What are the needs of the position, and how do my abilities and interests fit the needs of the job? To what extent am I using the gifts God has given me to make a positive difference in this job?
  3. If I’m not a fit, why am I staying in this job? What is keeping me for making a change? What’s the payoff to me? Is God trying to teach me something about my character while in this difficult job? Is it possible God wants me to remain i n the “toughest job in America” for reasons I don’t quite understand yet?
  4. Ask God for wisdom and discernment about my career. To what extent am I doing my job well to please God? To what extent am I trusting God to help me with the difficulties of my job? Am I willing to trust God to open up doors to a new job?

These 4 ideas are all about bringing our relationship with God to bear on our relationship with our job and activities during our waking hours. He’s a resource we tend to forget is available to us in dealing with our relationship with our career. It doesn’t have to be that way. The choice is ours.

If we were to do the things I just mentioned, and call upon God to help us with our work life, we wouldn’t feel the urge to compare ourselves with others, to evaluate them in comparison to our self. We’d have more compassion for others in their work, when we see their gifting and talents not matching the requirements of the work they’ve been called upon to do. We’d be grateful for whatever blessings our employment provides us.

Before I close, here’s the he main take-away from today’s episode, our show in a sentence:

How we relate to our job is often a reflection of how we relate to God.

How can we respond to today’s show?

Two things come to mind. First off, if we are employed in a job that makes good use of our abilities and interests, be ever so thankful to God for this blessing. Secondly, look around and notice those who are not similarly blessed. Think of the “museum guards” in your life who are bored to death, think of the “pastors” you know with so many stresses in their life. Then pray for them, show compassion for them, enter into their world as much as they will allow you. And, of course, leave a big tip when you pay your bill.

Relationship Quote of the Week

"There is no deep knowledge of God without a deep knowledge of self, and no deep knowing of self without a deep knowing of God. "    ~ John Calvin

Closing

Well thanks for listening in to today’s episode. Remember what you were made for. You were made to experience life-giving, fulling relationships. Even in your relationship with your work. We’re here together to learn how. See you next week. Good bye for now.