Episode 075 - Negative Mother Complex: When Our Painful Childhood Owns Us
Release Date: 09/05/2019
This Jungian Life
It seems that an intrepid consortium of impact investors, real estate developers, and the Swiss Tourism, Farming, and Dairy Products Oversight Authority have created a juggernaut heading for in Kusnacht and his famous tower in . The enterprise called Große Böse Wölfe Hinein Unterwäsche has announced its plans to finalize the acquisition of Jung’s estate and transform it. The modernization of revered sites is familiar across the world. Saddled with mounting maintenance costs and increasing government regulation, British Estates have been repurposed as luxury...
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Schadenfreude, the joy in someone else’s misfortune, is a common human experience. We often feel it when someone we believe deserves it embarrasses themselves or is caught in a scandal. Nietzsche once said, “Humor is just schadenfreude with a clear conscience.” This is true, as many comedic scenes involve some form of hilarious undoing. However, when this pleasure becomes malicious, it can be troubling. Some rules govern schadenfreude. We feel pleasure when an envied person is shamed because it tarnishes their status, making them seem less superior. We delight in the failure of...
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The Pied Piper story holds a dark secret that has repelled and fascinated us for over 500 years. It asks, "What does it cost to banish our shadow?" At its surface, it looks like a simple morality tale cautioning us to be prudent and fair. Rats overrun a town, and the locals are beside themselves. A magical piper vibrantly dressed offers a solution too good to be true. His pipe weaves a tune that leads rats to their doom – and they drown in the ocean so neatly. Thrilled at first, then cunning and foolish, the town leaders refuse to pay the piper for his service. In turn, he entrances...
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The archetype of the orphan, closely related to the hero, evokes powerful feelings of abandonment, deprivation, and hope. From Harry Potter to Little Orphan Annie from Daenerys Targaryen to Cinderella, orphans who triumph over adversity remind us that healing the inner child is possible. The factual history of orphans is frequently heartbreaking. In the ancient world, unwanted infants were subject to abandonment or death through exposure. In the US, moved 200,00 children from NE coastal cities to live with farm families between 1853 to 1929. Journalists exposed the nightmare...
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The word test originally referred to an earthenware vessel in which metals were smelted to separate ore from dross. Like ancient vessels holding the heat of the refining fire, our task is to contain the tension of the test. Tests smelt fantasy from the ore of reality and force us to adapt. If a test feels arbitrary or unfair, we may be failing to dissolve the dross of inadequacy, limitation, or shame. Tests require us to develop the ego strength to put our courage, morals, and perseverance on the line—and withstand the ego wounding of failure. Ultimately ego itself is put to the test. Jung...
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Despite volumes written on morality and ethics, how do we determine what’s right? Values distilled over time by family, faith, and nation define and denounce wrong, but the effort to banish shadow only allows it to emerge as projection onto others. We decry in ‘them’ what we deny in ourselves. Jung says, “The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality…for to become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects [of oneself]…as present and real.” We have all faced a moral dilemma at some point in our lives, questioning our own judgment and...
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Invitations are a subtle siren song, tapping into our primal human need to be chosen combined with our thirst for novelty, making them an irresistible force. When you receive an invitation, it is a moment of recognition, an invitation to be a part of something greater, to feel wanted, valued, and accepted. In the hierarchy of human needs, the sense of belonging takes a top priority, surpassed only by our basic requirements for survival. There is power in inviting and being invited. The myth of Baucis and Philemon, who innocently invited Zeus and Hermes to dine in their humble cottage, and were...
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When the goddess Aphrodite claims us too fully, over time, our bodies become abandoned temples of physical perfection, sexual allure, and romantic passion. Her seductive archetypal power has captivated us for eons, but in today’s world, the enhancements of fashion, beauty, and physical appearance have intensified veneration of this goddess. However, her enchantments can have profound consequences, particularly when it comes to aging and the pressures of perfection. In this episode, we delve into the mysterious realm of the archetype with guest Arlene Landau, Ph.D. - a...
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Marriage is a mystery woven into the fabric of time. A 4,000-year-old contract etched in stone bears witness to its timeless significance. But what is the meaning behind this union of two souls? Jung saw the definition of marriage as an alchemy of instinct and divinity, a blending of the physical and the spiritual. It is a bond that extends beyond legal and familial ties into the realm of the sacred. The purpose of marriage is a journey of individuation, a chance for each partner to grow and flourish within the embrace of a supportive union - it is a crucible of transformation. Tempered...
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Guest Eve Maram, PsyD, is a clinical psychologist and Jungian analyst in Orange, CA. Her book, The Schizophrenia Complex, presents a clear-eyed and compassionate understanding of our encounters with severe mental illness. The submergence in unconscious chaos that defines schizophrenia triggers negative emotions in others—yet Jung on psychosis showed that we are different from those patients only in degree. Significantly his Word Association Test proved that the unconscious influences everyone’s daily life in multiple ways. Moreover, Jung’s psychiatric work with psychotic...
info_outlineHealing a Negative Mother Complex
As the mother is the generator of life and usual primary attachment figure, the mother complex is universal. As the image of a “personified affect” fueled by an archetypal core, the mother complex is especially powerful. In its negative aspect, it may arise from a mother who was experienced as uncaring, attacking, possessive, withholding, absent, or wounded. It is likely to show up in relationships with others and in the relationship with oneself. Fairy tales like The Raven and Six Swans teach us that healing a negative mother complex takes time and perseverance—and that we may be aided by an animus prince or an anima princess, images of the autonomous unconscious. By responding to the turmoil of the mother complex one can embrace the task of finding the mother within. Dream
"Last night I had a dream I was in a cave that had mosaic designs all over the walls. They were old ancient ruins like from Ancient Greece or Turkey. The first one was of some type of fertility goddess-like Ishtar or Lilith, but I can’t remember the details exactly. But the image frightened me, and I was afraid to go inside. Then above the ruins, there was a church. It was an Eastern Orthodox Church. It sort of reminded me of the Hagia Sofia. A painting of the Black Madonna was hanging on the wall. All the church members were women and the pastor was a woman as well. I don’t recall what we were talking about or what the pastor was saying, but I was transfixed upon that painting. That’s all I can remember."
References
Book: Elinor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman
YouTube: Clay Weiner (“Videos”: Mothers Day) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HAxfh8ukosQ