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Kai Werder on Skin Hunger During COVID-19 and Desire Discrepancies Between Partners

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Release Date: 08/24/2020

Cannabis, Sexual Health, and Pleasure show art Cannabis, Sexual Health, and Pleasure

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Ashley Manta, Kiana Reeves, and John Renko join Tristan Taormino to talk about cannabis, sexual health, and pleasure. We talk about how cannabis products, including arousal oil, lubricants, and suppositories can treat sexual pain, inflammation, and trouble with arousal. We go over the difference between a CBD product and one with CBD and THC and how to be an informed consumer in a market that has been flooded with unregulated CBD products. As medical professionals often invalidate, pathologize, or simply have no solutions for pelvic pain, vaginismus, and vulvodynia, cannabis is a natural,...

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Foreskin and Circumcision with Georganne Chapin show art Foreskin and Circumcision with Georganne Chapin

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Tristan Taormino welcomes Intactivist Georganne Chapin from Intact America to educate listeners on the anatomy and sexual importance of the foreskin of the penis. No professional medical association in the United States or the rest of the world recommends routine circumcision, yet it’s incredibly prevalent in America. We discuss the debate surrounding routine circumcision in male infants. What are some of the arguments about why circumcision is necessary, and how many of them stand up to fact-checking and science? Does opposing circumcision devalue cultural and religious practices? We talk...

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Disability Justice and Sex with Lydia X. Z. Brown, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha, Katie Tastrom show art Disability Justice and Sex with Lydia X. Z. Brown, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha, Katie Tastrom

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Lydia X. Z. Brown, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha, and Katie Tastrom join Tristan Taormino to talk about disability justice, sex, and relationships. We explore the question: what does it mean to apply a Disability Justice lens to sexuality and sex-positive culture? What are the effects when Black and Brown disabled people are hypersexualized, desexualized or degendered? On an interpersonal level, desexualization assumes disabled folks don’t have agency or skill when it comes to their sexuality and can put pressure on them to perform a kind of hypersexuality. We discuss desirability and...

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Jessica Fern on Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Polyamory and Nonmonogamy show art Jessica Fern on Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Polyamory and Nonmonogamy

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Therapist Jessica Fern joins Tristan Taormino to talk about her new book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy. We talk about the basics of attachment theory and how to challenge the inherent mononormativity in it in order to apply it to nonmonogamy, especially polyamory. There is an in-depth discussion of childhood and ongoing trauma and how it relates to our relationships as well as the effects of larger societal systems on our sense of identity, safety, and security. We explore the co-regulation of our nervous systems, the difference between secure connection and a...

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Justin Lehmiller on America’s Most Common Sexual Fantasies, Groups, Nonmonogamy, Public, Taboo, and BDSM show art Justin Lehmiller on America’s Most Common Sexual Fantasies, Groups, Nonmonogamy, Public, Taboo, and BDSM

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

This show is all about sexual fantasies! Tristan Taormino talks to Dr. Justin Lehmiller about his book Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life and his research which includes the largest study of Americans’ sexual fantasies. We review the seven broad categories he divides them into: multi-partner sex; power, control, and rough sex; novelty, adventure, and variety; taboo and forbidden sex; partner sharing and nonmonogamous relationships; passion and romance; and erotic flexibility. Plus, we discuss other findings about gender, sexual...

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Jen Manion on Female Husbands: A Trans History show art Jen Manion on Female Husbands: A Trans History

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Historian Jen Manion joins Tristan Taormino to discuss her new book Female Husbands: A Trans History. How did some people assigned female at birth began living their lives as men in the 18th and 19th Centuries? Manion did extensive research on primary source materials including marriage certificates, census records, court documents, local and national and newspapers. In their book, Manion introduces us to the lives of U.K. female husbands Charles Hamilton, Henry Fielding, James Howe, James Gray, Samuel Bunday, William Chandler, Robert Shurtliff, James Allen, and Henry Stoake. We learn about...

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Farzana Doctor: Speaking Out Against Female Genital Mutilation  show art Farzana Doctor: Speaking Out Against Female Genital Mutilation

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Author Farzana Doctor sits down with Tristan Taormino to discuss her latest novel Seven which revolves around the practice of khatna, a ritual female genital cutting in Dawoodi Bohra communities. According to the World Health Organization, more than 200 million girls and women alive today have been cut in 30 countries in Africa, the Middle East and Asia where female genital mutilation (also called female genital mutilation or female circumcision) is concentrated. They discuss what it means when religion attempts to control women’s bodies and sexuality, and the devastating effects of silence,...

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Amanda Blumenthal on Being an Intimacy Coordinator for TV and Film show art Amanda Blumenthal on Being an Intimacy Coordinator for TV and Film

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

In the age of #MeToo, there has been a reckoning in Hollywood about sexual harassment and that extends to the way folks are treated during productions. Intimacy coordinator and founder of Intimacy Professionals Association Amanda Blumenthal joins Tristan Taormino to talk about this growing profession in Hollywood and beyond. She tells us what intimacy coordinators do, challenges they face on set, and what their training is like. She explores power dynamics on a production, how actors sometimes don’t feel like they can’t voice their sexual boundaries to a director, and why being an advocate...

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Erin C. Law and Dr. Robyn Henderson-Espinoza on Orienting Toward Resilience: Taking a Somatic Approach to Anti-Racist Work show art Erin C. Law and Dr. Robyn Henderson-Espinoza on Orienting Toward Resilience: Taking a Somatic Approach to Anti-Racist Work

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Many of us have experienced stress and tension in relation to the unrelenting racist violence and oppression. There has been an explosion in public dialogue around white supremacy, whiteness, and racism and some are beginning to view this as “cultural trauma.” Dr. Robyn Henderson-Espinoza and Erin C. Law do a Sex Out Loud Takeover this episode, where host Tristan Taormino hands over the mic for them to have an important conversation. Robyn and Erin offer a different inroad to approach anti-racist work looking at whiteness and racism through a lens of somatic methodology, and drawing on the...

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Sinnamon Love & Jet Setting Jasmine on Racism, Inequity, and Resistance in the P*rn Industry show art Sinnamon Love & Jet Setting Jasmine on Racism, Inequity, and Resistance in the P*rn Industry

Sex Out Loud with Tristan Taormino

Award winning porn performers and content creators Sinnamon Love and Jet Setting Jasmine join Tristan Taormino to discuss the realities and disparities for performers of color in the adult industry. Inequities persist in wages, visibility, power, and opportunities and companies continue to produce content with racial fetishization, stereotypes, and offensive language and marketing. We talk about how to address the inequality and oppression performers of color face, how marginalized folks are creating their own content, and how average consumers can support sex workers of color. We also dive...

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Sex educator and coach Kai Werder joins Tristan to talk about one of the crucial issues facing lots of people during COVID-19: skin hunger. We discuss how a lack of sexual and non-sexual touch on top of a pandemic affects our physical and mental health. Kai offers a thoughtful, nuanced perspective on dealing with touch deprivation and practical communication tools in the digital age. Then they talk about their theories of mismatched libidos and the Desire Discrepancy workbook they created to help folks struggling with one of the most common issues in relationships. Kai is a certified sex educator, coach, writer, and healing practitioner living on the occupied Chitimacha Tribal territory of New Orleans, LA. They believe in moving alongside clients and students as a guide towards healing through pleasure. Their work centers consent-based education that is shame-free, LGBTQ prioritized, and trauma-informed. You can find her published writing on sites like Allure, Teen Vogue, MTV, Kinkly, and GO Magazine. They are currently a candidate for Masters in Social Work at Tulane University and hope to use their degree to break down barriers of mental health services for queer and trans survivors.