A Lesson on Rewiring for Wealth with Barbara Huson

Barbara Huson has devoted decades to empowering women as a financial therapist, wealth coach, and author. In this episode, Kim speaks to her about her 7th book, Rewire For Wealth, and the three steps every woman can take to step into their power and program their brain for financial success.

TOPICS DISCUSSED IN THIS EPISODE:

•  How Barbara’s father and first marriage didn’t teach her about money but prepared her to help women financially.
• Banks could refuse women a credit card until the Equal Credit Opportunity Act of 1974 was signed into law. Prior to that, a bank could refuse to issue a credit card to an unmarried woman, and if a woman was married, her husband was required to cosign.
• Why women are afraid of their power.
• Being MetaFISCAL and what it means.
• How a women’s spiritual journey connects with her financial wellbeing.
• Barbara’s three levels of financial development: survival, stability, affluence.
• Are you an under-earner?
• The two emotions to recognize when going from survival to stability on your financial journey.
• Barbara’s 3-step formula to rewiring our brains for wealth.
• Why it can be difficult to rewire.
• The connection between our brain and our thoughts and how we can change the negative thoughts we tell ourselves.
• The balance between love and fear.
• Receptive surrender and how it relates to COVID-19 and what we are collectively going through as a whole.
• Why Barbara changed her last name.

#LESSONUP:

(2:50- 3:50) I realized very early in my work with women and wealth is that women's issues with money have very little of anything to do with money. And it has everything to do with their fear up or ambivalence about power because women don't understand power from a feminine perspective. And in my definition, a powerful woman is someone who knows who she is, who knows what she wants, and expresses that in the world unapologetically. So essentially our fear of power is our fear of becoming all of who we're meant to be, to really shining our light in the world, and dimming ourselves down. So we don't make waves. And for the patriarchy men see power as power over we don't, for us, power is power with, we are collaborative. We are all about power with.

(4:09-5:00) I remember interviewing a psychologist who specialized in financial matters and I asked her, why are women so afraid of their power? And she said to me, something gave me full-body chills. She said powerful women have been burned at the stake. Yes. And I believe it is in our collective unconsciousness that we have this fear of being punished or having catastrophic outcomes if we are powerful. But in order to create wealth in order to make a difference in the world, we have to become a container that can attract, sustain and grow our money. And that's what's required of us. Mother Theresa said it takes a checkbook to change the world. And it's so true.

(10:07- 10:20) Under-earning never feeds your soul. It is always an act of deprivation and not just of money, but of time of choices, of freedom, and most of all of self-esteem.

(10:45- 11:20) Our brain which is a physical organ in our body controls our behavior. Everything we do inhaling, exhaling, saving, spending is controlled by our brain. Our mind is a non-physical entity, the source of thoughts and feelings. And what flows through the mind is what shapes the brain. So if you want to change your behavior, it's really hard. It's really, really challenging to change your behavior unless without changing your brain first, and the way you change your brain is by changing your thoughts and feelings.

(13:28-13:56) All rewiring is unlearning the thoughts that don't serve you so you can, we can program into your brain thoughts that serve you. You recognize the thought you reframe it, but it's not enough to change your behavior unless you do the third step, which is respond differently. Don't want to do, do what doesn't feel. Right. Do what you think. This isn't me. This isn't me. Those are all signs that you are rewiring your brain.

(14:55- 15:40) The effects of COVID are many, but one of it for us is enforcing us to reconsider our life. And are we going in the direction we need to go? And thing to do when you get the call, when you realize, Hmm, I need to make some changes. Whether you want to or not. The universe tells you time to make a change. What you need to do is step back and receptive surrender… to get quiet because the idea is to tune into your soul. And in order to hear our soul, we must be quiet. Our soul needs stillness. Our ego, which is telling us, telling you, you're not enough. You must do this. You should do this. It's so loud. It's screaming at you. So you need to get quiet to see what your soul has to tell you.

(20:30- 21:50) I think we do not need to get to the state where I was, where it was feeling heavy. I do not think we need to get to this point. This is about you as a black woman asking for support because you give it to other people without question. So why can you not give it to yourself? And I think that is what I would say to any woman listening, give to yourself what you would give to others without question. And a lot of us do that, but we don't think that we are worthy of that. And that was a lesson that I had to learn because I do it. I show up for everybody and I show up in a way and give a hundred percent at all times. And yet I don't feel that I'm worthy of that level of support. 

(17:38- 18:00) I want women to know how much power they have to create the life that they want. How much power, how much is in their control. How absolutely much how their thinking is so powerful. The creative power of thought is mind-boggling. And then when you can shift your thinking, you actually rewire your brain and your behavior will change. And there's nothing you can't do.