Kitchen Chats with Aimee Kandrac Episode 12: When There’s No One To Call
Release Date: 01/12/2023
Navigating the Quiet House: Empty Nests and Solo Living
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This episode of Kitchen Chats features host Aimee Kandrac and her friend Shannon Cohen discussing the multifaceted experience of empty nesting and living alone. They share their personal journeys of navigating the transition as their children went off to college, highlighting the initial strangeness of a quieter house and the adjustment to new routines. The conversation touches on relatable topics such as the changed grocery shopping habits, the shift in knowing their children's whereabouts, and the challenge of moving from active parenting to a more supportive role. Aimee and Shannon also...
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Retreating after a major event
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
Host Aimee Kandrac and Dr. Samantha Franklin about the importance of allowing oneself to retreat after major life events. Here's a breakdown of the key themes and points discussed: Key Themes: The Validity of Retreating: The episode emphasizes that it's perfectly acceptable and often necessary to withdraw from social interactions after experiencing significant life changes. Dr. Franklin, a self-proclaimed introvert, explains how retreating provides comfort, control, and a space for emotional regulation. The hosts discuss how major life events can make individuals feel as though their lives...
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The Importance of Team
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This conversation between Aimee and Charlie explores the importance of teamwork during major life transitions. Here's a summary of their discussion: Teamwork Beyond Sports: While the concept of a team is often associated with sports, they emphasize its relevance in navigating life's challenges. Just as a race car driver relies on a pit crew, individuals facing transitions need a support system. Defining Your Team: They discuss the different roles people play on your team, from close family and friends to professionals like doctors or therapists. The team can also include unexpected...
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The Multifaceted Nature of Grief
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This podcast episode of Kitchen Chats explores the multifaceted nature of grief, emphasizing that it's not solely tied to death but arises from various life transitions like divorce, empty nesting, or even positive changes. Host Aimee Kandrac and guest, Ashley Parsons, discuss how the commonly referenced "five stages of grief" are often misapplied and can make people feel like they're grieving incorrectly. They highlight that grief and joy can coexist, and asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. The conversation offers practical advice for supporting someone grieving, stressing...
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The Emotional Toll of Moving
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This conversation between two friends, Aimee and Kristi, delves into the emotional and practical aspects of moving. This conversation provides a comprehensive overview of the many facets of moving and offers practical advice for both those who are moving and those who want to support them. Emotional Attachment to Homes: They emphasize the strong emotional connections people have with their homes, filled with memories and personal significance. This makes moving a complex process, even when it's desired. The Difficulty of Purging: Letting go of possessions, especially when tied to loved ones...
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The complexities of divorce
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This is a powerful conversation about the complexities of divorce and the importance of support systems. Here are some key takeaways: The Emotional Toll: Divorce is a deeply emotional experience, often involving grief, sadness, anger, and feelings of rejection. The Impact on Social Life: Navigating social interactions after separation can be challenging. People often feel the pressure to explain their situation while simultaneously wanting to protect their privacy. The Importance of Support: Friends and family play a crucial role in providing emotional support. Checking in regularly, offering...
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The First Person I Called
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This is a fascinating conversation between two sisters! Here's a summary of their discussion: The Impact of Major Life Events: They delve into the emotional and practical challenges of navigating significant life transitions, such as a cancer diagnosis, divorce, and the subsequent emotional and social isolation. The Role of Support Systems: Stephanie emphasizes the importance of trusted confidantes and the delicate balance of offering support while respecting boundaries. They discuss the concept of "kitchen counter" vs. "sidewalk" relationships, highlighting the varying levels of intimacy and...
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Major Life Transitions
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
Kitchen Chats is a podcast where friends come together to support each other through major life transitions. This season, host Aimee Kandrac shares her own experiences with personal challenges, including: Empty nesting: Dealing with the emotional impact of her youngest child leaving for college. Health concerns: Discovering a potential tumor and undergoing surgery. Divorce: Unexpectedly separating from her husband. Moving: Selling her family home after the separation. Aimee emphasizes that while these events were incredibly difficult, she ultimately found healing and happiness with the...
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Kitchen Chats with Aimee Kandrac Episode 25: Live from the Maven Space with Rachel Macy Stafford
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
Live from the Maven Space in downtown Indianapolis, Aimee Kandrac reunites with Rachel Macy Stafford, best-selling author of Hands Free Mama, Only Love Today, Soul Shift, and more. Aimee and Rachel discuss the challenge of letting go of routine, especially during times of crisis. They also share touching words of encouragement from friends and neighbors, emphasize the importance of looking after yourself, and destigmatize asking for help. Episode Abridged Transcript Aimee: Welcome to Kitchen Chats. Today we are coming to you live from Maven Space in downtown Indianapolis. I am so honored to...
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Kitchen Chats with Aimee Kandrac Episode 24: Navigating Grief with Hope and Purpose
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
In this poignant and heartfelt podcast episode, Aimee chats with Colin Campbell, author of Finding the Words: Working Through Profound Loss with Hope and Purpose. Colin, who experienced the tragic death of his two children, shares his personal journey. He also offers profound insights on navigating grief after profound loss and finding solace in community and traditions. Episode Highlights Share a heartfelt message. After the tragic death of his two children, Colin had many messages pouring into his inbox. One of the most memorable and heartwarming came from his son’s friend, who wrote how...
info_outlineThe first season of Kitchen Chats focused on the first people you call during a crisis. But what if you have no one to call? Or if the people you reach out to don’t step up? Aimee brings back her sister, Stephanie, who is also a licensed therapist. Stephanie shares that feeling alone, isolated, or abandoned is a common experience and gives tips for finding resources and building community.
Episode Highlights
If you feel alone, you’re not alone.
As a therapist, Stephanie knows it’s common for people to feel abandoned, alone, or isolated. For some, even talking about it to a therapist like Stephanie can be hard.
“There are so many moments where we can feel like we don’t have anybody to call, even if we have a big circle,” Stepahnie said. “And there are also moments when we realize that we don’t have a circle.”
Get to know your community.
The technology age has made knocking on your neighbor’s door a little more awkward than it used to be. But if you’re proactive about building your community, you won’t have to be reactive when times get tough. One way to build community is to ask people in your area for resource recommendations like counselors and therapists.
“That way, you do have those numbers in your back pocket when or if the time comes you need them and you’re not scrambling to try and figure it out,” she said.
Be a smart shopper.
If you’re looking to build or refine your inner circle, consider who you’re asking to help with what. When Stephanie talks with clients and friends, she uses the analogy of being a smart shopper. For instance, if you go to the hardware store to buy bread, you’re going to be disappointed.
“I use this analogy of being a smart shopper for learning to know who in your life can offer what,” she said. “Not everybody is going to be your Target, and you don’t want everybody to be Target. You need specialty stores, too.”
Not everyone has to be a friend.
Not everyone you reach out to in tough times has to be a friend. Members of a faith community, support groups, and community centers can all help directly or connect you with resources. Stephanie also recommends reaching out to a therapist.
“Reaching out to a therapist is never a bad idea,” she said. “Even if that therapist isn’t the right fit for you, they can help you find some of the other resources that you do need.”
When someone comes to you.
Sometimes, you may not realize you’re a person’s “kitchen counter” kind of friend until they open up to you. At that time, it’s important to consider how to hold space and ask how you can support them.
“We never know what we mean to someone else,” Stephanie said. “We don’t know when we may be the person that someone else needs.”
Don’t forget you can call or text 988.
If you’re feeling at a point of desperation or loneliness, you can always text or dial 988 for the Suicide Prevention Lifeline. When you call, someone will be there to answer who wants to talk to you.
“You’re worth talking to,” Stephanie said. “Every single one of us is always worth talking to even when we feel like we are not. That can be hard to hold in some moments of real desperation, but I really hope people know that they’re valued, they’re loved, they’re worthy.”
Resources + Links
- If you need someone to talk to, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide Prevention Lifeline.
- Kitchen Chats on YouTube
- Aimee Kandrac: Website, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn
- WhatFriendsDo: Website, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn
About Aimee and WhatFriendsDo
Aimee Kandrac is a speaker, consultant, and the co-founder and CEO of WhatFriendsDo. Her work is instrumental for organizing support during life-changing events, and she speaks to organizations about creative ways to help friends and family during times of crisis. Aimee has been recognized as a Top 50 Mompreneur by Babble.com and is the first female CEO in the state of Indiana to close a $500,000 funding round. She has been featured in Forbes, Time, the LA Times, Oprah.com, the Indianapolis Star, and more.
WhatFriendsDo is a simpler way to create organized and actionable support during a time of crisis. The free, online platform empowers healthcare facilities, HR departments, families, and friends to easily coordinate meals, errands, transportation, childcare, communication, and more for those in the midst of a life-changing event. The women-founded and women-led company started as a solution for a friend with terminal cancer. WhatFriendsDo is based out of Indianapolis.