Kitchen Chats with Aimee Kandrac Episode 20: Supporting Military Members and Veterans
Release Date: 03/16/2023
Navigating the Quiet House: Empty Nests and Solo Living
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This episode of Kitchen Chats features host Aimee Kandrac and her friend Shannon Cohen discussing the multifaceted experience of empty nesting and living alone. They share their personal journeys of navigating the transition as their children went off to college, highlighting the initial strangeness of a quieter house and the adjustment to new routines. The conversation touches on relatable topics such as the changed grocery shopping habits, the shift in knowing their children's whereabouts, and the challenge of moving from active parenting to a more supportive role. Aimee and Shannon also...
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Retreating after a major event
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
Host Aimee Kandrac and Dr. Samantha Franklin about the importance of allowing oneself to retreat after major life events. Here's a breakdown of the key themes and points discussed: Key Themes: The Validity of Retreating: The episode emphasizes that it's perfectly acceptable and often necessary to withdraw from social interactions after experiencing significant life changes. Dr. Franklin, a self-proclaimed introvert, explains how retreating provides comfort, control, and a space for emotional regulation. The hosts discuss how major life events can make individuals feel as though their lives...
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The Importance of Team
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This conversation between Aimee and Charlie explores the importance of teamwork during major life transitions. Here's a summary of their discussion: Teamwork Beyond Sports: While the concept of a team is often associated with sports, they emphasize its relevance in navigating life's challenges. Just as a race car driver relies on a pit crew, individuals facing transitions need a support system. Defining Your Team: They discuss the different roles people play on your team, from close family and friends to professionals like doctors or therapists. The team can also include unexpected...
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The Multifaceted Nature of Grief
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This podcast episode of Kitchen Chats explores the multifaceted nature of grief, emphasizing that it's not solely tied to death but arises from various life transitions like divorce, empty nesting, or even positive changes. Host Aimee Kandrac and guest, Ashley Parsons, discuss how the commonly referenced "five stages of grief" are often misapplied and can make people feel like they're grieving incorrectly. They highlight that grief and joy can coexist, and asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. The conversation offers practical advice for supporting someone grieving, stressing...
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The Emotional Toll of Moving
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This conversation between two friends, Aimee and Kristi, delves into the emotional and practical aspects of moving. This conversation provides a comprehensive overview of the many facets of moving and offers practical advice for both those who are moving and those who want to support them. Emotional Attachment to Homes: They emphasize the strong emotional connections people have with their homes, filled with memories and personal significance. This makes moving a complex process, even when it's desired. The Difficulty of Purging: Letting go of possessions, especially when tied to loved ones...
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The complexities of divorce
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This is a powerful conversation about the complexities of divorce and the importance of support systems. Here are some key takeaways: The Emotional Toll: Divorce is a deeply emotional experience, often involving grief, sadness, anger, and feelings of rejection. The Impact on Social Life: Navigating social interactions after separation can be challenging. People often feel the pressure to explain their situation while simultaneously wanting to protect their privacy. The Importance of Support: Friends and family play a crucial role in providing emotional support. Checking in regularly, offering...
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The First Person I Called
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
This is a fascinating conversation between two sisters! Here's a summary of their discussion: The Impact of Major Life Events: They delve into the emotional and practical challenges of navigating significant life transitions, such as a cancer diagnosis, divorce, and the subsequent emotional and social isolation. The Role of Support Systems: Stephanie emphasizes the importance of trusted confidantes and the delicate balance of offering support while respecting boundaries. They discuss the concept of "kitchen counter" vs. "sidewalk" relationships, highlighting the varying levels of intimacy and...
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Major Life Transitions
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
Kitchen Chats is a podcast where friends come together to support each other through major life transitions. This season, host Aimee Kandrac shares her own experiences with personal challenges, including: Empty nesting: Dealing with the emotional impact of her youngest child leaving for college. Health concerns: Discovering a potential tumor and undergoing surgery. Divorce: Unexpectedly separating from her husband. Moving: Selling her family home after the separation. Aimee emphasizes that while these events were incredibly difficult, she ultimately found healing and happiness with the...
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Kitchen Chats with Aimee Kandrac Episode 25: Live from the Maven Space with Rachel Macy Stafford
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
Live from the Maven Space in downtown Indianapolis, Aimee Kandrac reunites with Rachel Macy Stafford, best-selling author of Hands Free Mama, Only Love Today, Soul Shift, and more. Aimee and Rachel discuss the challenge of letting go of routine, especially during times of crisis. They also share touching words of encouragement from friends and neighbors, emphasize the importance of looking after yourself, and destigmatize asking for help. Episode Abridged Transcript Aimee: Welcome to Kitchen Chats. Today we are coming to you live from Maven Space in downtown Indianapolis. I am so honored to...
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Kitchen Chats with Aimee Kandrac Episode 24: Navigating Grief with Hope and Purpose
WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats
In this poignant and heartfelt podcast episode, Aimee chats with Colin Campbell, author of Finding the Words: Working Through Profound Loss with Hope and Purpose. Colin, who experienced the tragic death of his two children, shares his personal journey. He also offers profound insights on navigating grief after profound loss and finding solace in community and traditions. Episode Highlights Share a heartfelt message. After the tragic death of his two children, Colin had many messages pouring into his inbox. One of the most memorable and heartwarming came from his son’s friend, who wrote how...
info_outlineAimee chats with Phillip Sheppard, a star of the hit television show Survivor, U.S. Army veteran, and former special agent, as they discuss how to support our military members and their families. Phillip, who comes from a large military family and has a son currently serving in the Army, knows firsthand the sacrifices that soldiers and their families make. He shares insights on how to remind soldiers and veterans they’re loved, tips for making mail day special, and how to help veterans access benefits.
Episode Highlights
Remind soldiers and veterans that they’re loved.
Phillip comes from a large military family that now extends to his son. He knows from firsthand experience that soldiers like his son need to hear how much they’re loved while on duty.
“Communication is number one,” Phillip said. “You are loved.”
Even if you don’t personally know a military member or veteran, you can still find ways to remind soldiers and veterans they’re not alone. For instance, you can volunteer to do activities for veterans.
“Once they get back home we have to embrace them and let them know that we love them,” Phillip said.
Make mail day special.
One part of military life is mail call, where military members get letters and care packages from people they care about back home. Even though soldiers today have email and cell phones, it’s still quite meaningful to get a letter from a loved one, Phillip said.
“There’s nothing like a well-written letter, right?” Phillip said. “A letter is something you can feel.”
Another way to let a military member know you’re thinking of them is to mail a care package, which can be especially nice for the holidays. Phillip recommends sending a soldier’s favorite item from home.
“I send my son care packages where they have fruits,” Phillip said. “Fruits are his favorite goodies. Those are something he missed from when he was at home.”
Don’t forget military families.
It’s not just people enlisted in the military who make big sacrifices to protect the U.S. Spouses and children who live on bases in cities away from their home towns can also benefit from support, such as care packages of their own.
“If your friend just had a baby, there’s not enough diapers, right?” Phillip said. “You can order everything online now and put in a note.”
Help veterans navigate the system.
Veterans are entitled to numerous benefits, including mental and physical healthcare and opportunities for education, rehability, and careers. However, the programs are sometimes difficult for veterans to understand or navigate. Friends and family can help support veterans by offering to go to the Veterans Affairs (VA) office with them.
“They just need somebody to go in and hold their hand,” Phillip said. “The VA is not a bad place to go. Sometimes a first person isn’t suitable for you, but you will get the person you need to talk to, and they can get you on our journey.”
Listen without judgment.
Military members and veterans go through experiences that can forever change them, and in some cases, alter their perception of reality. One of the best ways you can help military members and veterans, particularly those who may have a mental health condition, is to listen without judgment.
“The most important thing you can do with a loved one, or anyone, is to listen without judgment,” Phillip said. “I suspend any judgment about a person’s situation because you don’t know what they’ve been through, and you don’t know how that impacted them personally.”
Resources + Links
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Phillip Sheppard’s Books: The Legend of Things Past, The Russian Job
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WhatFriendsDo: Website, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn
About Aimee and WhatFriendsDo
Aimee Kandrac is a speaker, consultant, and the co-founder and CEO of WhatFriendsDo. Her work is instrumental for organizing support during life-changing events, and she speaks to organizations about creative ways to help friends and family during times of crisis. Aimee has been recognized as a Top 50 Mompreneur by Babble.com and is the first female CEO in the state of Indiana to close a $500,000 funding round. She has been featured in Forbes, Time, the LA Times, Oprah.com, the Indianapolis Star, and more.
WhatFriendsDo is a simpler way to create organized and actionable support during a time of crisis. The free, online platform empowers healthcare facilities, HR departments, families, and friends to easily coordinate meals, errands, transportation, childcare, communication, and more for those in the midst of a life-changing event. The women-founded and women-led company started as a solution for a friend with terminal cancer. WhatFriendsDo is based out of Indianapolis.