008: Skills for Life: The Power of Family Meetings Revealed: Interview with Alyson Schafer
CircleIN: The Family Leadership Center Podcast
Release Date: 03/13/2025
CircleIN: The Family Leadership Center Podcast
Tired of "I'm bored" driving you crazy? 😩 This episode reveals why allowing kids to solve their own boredom can be a secret superpower! Marjie and Paige explore how modern parenting often prevents this crucial experience, and why allowing discomfort can spark incredible creativity and independence. Discover how to create an environment that encourages self-entertainment, building resilience and intrinsic motivation that lasts a lifetime. Get ready to embrace the quiet, trust your child's capabilities, and witness the magic born from doing "nothing." ✨ ...
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Think your child is just being difficult? Think again. We reveal the surprising reasons behind power struggles and how you can shift the dynamic with empathy and clarity. We welcome a favorite guest, Certified Parent Educator, Patti Cancellier. This episode is your blueprint for fewer battles and more peace. Remember, peace begins at home. _____________________________________________________ 💬Join the Conversation: Your ideas and questions matter. send us a voice message through our leave us an email us 🙏Subscribe & Rate: If you’re enjoying the...
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Tired of the screen time struggle? Discover how to influence (not just control!) your kids' tech habits with Adlerian (aka encouraging) wisdom! Marjie and Paige share their thoughts on starting with an apology for your part in the struggle. They focus on a myriad of ways to connect, set screen-free zones 📵, and "add in" compelling real-world experiences like adventures & jobs. Let's raise confident, balanced kids together! 💬Join the Conversation: We’d love to hear how you how you feel about parenting today around these tricky topics. Or if you struggle, let us know, we...
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Ever wonder how to help your child bounce back from challenges, genuinely care for others, and step up responsibly? We get it. The good news is, there's a powerful, yet simple, framework: The 4 Crucial Cs.* These essential building blocks are core needs, and actively nurturing them helps your child connect meaningfully and contribute positively. In today’s episode, you will learn how by focusing on the Cs, you'll empower your kids to develop self-discipline, and become confident problem-solvers. Ultimately, this approach fosters true resilience, enabling them to navigate life's ups and downs...
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What if the key to fewer power struggles wasn’t saying more, but saying less? In this episode, we dive into the power of listening to understand with Certified Parent Educator Patti Cancellier. Through examples and inspiring stories, we explore how simply being present and truly hearing your child can defuse conflict, build connection, and even encourage your child to solve their own problems. We’ll provide actionable guidance on how to practice focused listening in your family. And, you’ll discover how listening — without jumping to fix or advise — can be one of your most...
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Our gift to you this Mother’s Day is a conversation about busting the Mom Myths that leave us anxious and overwhelmed. We’ll share some of the myths we’ve personally believed, along with the ones we hear most often from colleagues and clients. And, most importantly, we’ll offer low-effort, high-impact ways to care for your child’s beloved Mom—you. Join the Conversation: Share your own Mom Myth plus the ways you take good care of YOU. Share your thoughts on social media or drop us an email at . 🙏Subscribe & Rate: If you’re enjoying the podcast, please take a moment to...
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In today’s episode, we dive into the transformative power of focusing on the positive actions our kids take, rather than always highlighting what they get wrong. Parenting can often feel like an endless cycle of correction, but what happens when we start noticing and celebrating the good? From the small gestures of kindness to big moments of growth, we explore how highlighting what's right can improve your relationship with your children, boost their self-esteem, and foster a more supportive family environment. Join the Conversation: We’d love to hear how you practice noticing what’s...
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As parents so often we get so wrapped up in issues- which aren’t even ours to solve! Today, we tackle a question that every parent faces: Who really owns the problem—the child or the parent? Marjie and Paige explore the delicate balance between our own problems, our kids’ problems, and a shared problem. Once we are clear whose problem it is, we know whether we need to take action, offer support, or discuss solutions. We see how getting clear on who owns the problem helps us respond in the most effective way—whether it's stepping back, offering guidance, or finding a...
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Many families have someone (often one of the parents) who is super capable and takes over the task of problem solving in the family. The challenge is that even if their ideas are great, they can run into trouble if the others don't buy into their solutions. What if we told you we have a tool that can help you focus, lower your emotions and get you into positive change? We have one and it’s called problem identification! Today we focus on the importance of recognizing challenges without shame or blame. We discuss how pinpointing the core issue can lead to more effective solutions...
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Family Meeting: a multi-modal tool packed with lifeskills. Alyson Schafer shares valuable wisdom and strategies about Family Meetings–the terrific way to give every child a platform to be able to solve their problems. This form of family meeting answers these questions: How do we give voice to everyone in the family? How do parents demonstrate leadership so everyone can hear each other and work harmoniously together? If we want to move away from the hierarchy model, what replaces it? They key stance for this form of leadership: We’re all working...
info_outlineFamily Meeting: a multi-modal tool packed with lifeskills. Alyson Schafer shares valuable wisdom and strategies about Family Meetings–the terrific way to give every child a platform to be able to solve their problems.
This form of family meeting answers these questions:
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How do we give voice to everyone in the family?
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How do parents demonstrate leadership so everyone can hear each other and work harmoniously together?
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If we want to move away from the hierarchy model, what replaces it?
They key stance for this form of leadership:
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We’re all working towards this shared goal.
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We all bring our insights and wisdom.
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Mutual respect and social equality are our baseline.
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Everyone has value. In this form of leadership, we solve problems instead of discipline people.
Leave energized and inspired to have a family meeting!
Host:
Marjie Longshore, Executive Director of Family Leadership Center, co-host of the CircleUP Podcast
Guest:
Alyson Schafer, a 3rd generation Adlerian and has earned the status of diplomate in Adlerian Psychology. She is a family counsellor and parenting expert and teaches and speaks internationally. At home in Canada, she is a media regular, hosts her own TV show as well as her podcast “Parenting The Adlerian Way”. Alyson has 3 parenting books with HarperCollins Canada: Breaking the Good Mom Myth; Honey I Wrecked the Kids; and Ain’t Misbehavin’.
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Resources
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Alyson Schafer + links to her books
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Alyson’s videos of Family Meeting: Family Meetings - YouTube
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Want to be notified when Family Leadership Center launches their new Family Meeting framework and Pocket Guide? Sign up here to be one of the first to get it.
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Raising Kids Who Can by Betty Lou Bettner and Amy Lew: available for purchase through Family Leadership Center
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