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When the Inner Critic Evolves

The Leadership Break

Release Date: 11/13/2025

What It Actually Looks Like to Choose Differently show art What It Actually Looks Like to Choose Differently

The Leadership Break

Episode 16 | What It Actually Looks Like to Choose Differently Awareness is powerful—but it’s not enough. In this episode, we move from insight to action. What does it actually look like to choose differently in the moment—when you're triggered, challenged, or feeling defensive? Through real examples and practical language, we explore how leaders can stay in the conversation without losing themselves—and why small shifts in response can change everything. In This Episode, We Explore: Why awareness alone doesn’t change your leadership The subtle ways leaders shut down conversations...

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The 5 Seconds That Define Your Leadership show art The 5 Seconds That Define Your Leadership

The Leadership Break

Episode 15 | The 5 Seconds That Define Your Leadership There’s a moment most leaders overlook—the few seconds right before they react. It’s not the big decisions that define your leadership. It’s the small, almost invisible moments where emotion rises and you choose what happens next. In this episode, we explore how quickly leaders can lose themselves under pressure—and how to begin noticing the patterns that shape your reactions. Because awareness is the first step toward leading yourself differently. In This Episode, We Explore: Why leadership breakdowns happen in...

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Viewing Feedback as a Gift (Without Pretending It’s Easy) show art Viewing Feedback as a Gift (Without Pretending It’s Easy)

The Leadership Break

Episode 14 | Viewing Feedback as a Gift (Without Pretending It’s Easy) You’ve probably heard the phrase “feedback is a gift.” But sometimes it feels more like a brick. In this episode of The Leadership Break, Paula explores how leaders can receive feedback with curiosity rather than defensiveness—and why discernment is just as important as openness. Not every piece of feedback is perfect, but thoughtful leaders know how to listen, extract insight, and grow. In this episode: Why not all feedback should be treated the same How curiosity can reduce defensiveness Learning to separate...

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Why Feedback Feels Like a Threat (and Why Leaders Get Defensive) show art Why Feedback Feels Like a Threat (and Why Leaders Get Defensive)

The Leadership Break

Episode 13 |  Why Feedback Feels Like a Threat (and Why Leaders Get Defensive) Receiving feedback is part of leadership—but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. In this episode of The Leadership Break, Paula explores why even thoughtful, well-intentioned leaders sometimes feel defensive when feedback is offered. Defensiveness isn’t a character flaw—it’s often a natural response to feeling that our competence, identity, or belonging is being questioned. In this conversation, Paula discusses how leaders can pause, reflect, and begin to see feedback as valuable information rather than...

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When You're Leading and You're Not the Boss - Part 2 show art When You're Leading and You're Not the Boss - Part 2

The Leadership Break

Episode 12 | When You're Leading and You're Not the Boss - Part 2 Staying, Speaking, or Leaving With Integrity When leadership above you falls short, leaving can feel like relief. Sometimes it is the right choice. But what happens when leaders leave without ever claiming their voice? In this second episode of the series, Paula explores the deeper discernment leaders face when working under weak leadership—and how to choose a path forward without shrinking, disappearing, or abandoning self-trust. This episode isn’t about staying longer than you should. It’s about making conscious,...

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When You're Leading and You're Not the Boss - Part 1 show art When You're Leading and You're Not the Boss - Part 1

The Leadership Break

Episode 11 | When You're Leading and You're Not the Boss - Part 1 Many capable leaders find themselves leading without the title, authority, or support that usually comes with that role and they find themselves doing their boss’s job. They’re steadying teams, holding standards, and absorbing tension—often quietly. In this episode of The Leadership Break, Paula explores the most common mistake leaders make when they’re leading without authority: staying silent in the name of professionalism while frustration leaks out in other ways. This episode is an invitation to examine silence,...

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The Radical Act of Doing Something That Goes Somewhere—Slowly show art The Radical Act of Doing Something That Goes Somewhere—Slowly

The Leadership Break

Episode 10 | The Radical Act of Doing Something That Goes Somewhere—Slowly In this episode of The Leadership Break, Paula reflects on a simple but challenging practice: creating a temperature blanket, one row at a time, over the course of a year. What begins as a hobby becomes a lesson in patience, restraint, and sustained commitment. For leaders in the quiet middle, progress is rarely dramatic—but it is meaningful. This episode explores why slow, steady effort can feel uncomfortable, how leaders “bring the weather” for their teams, and what it looks like to model a humane pace in a...

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Mentorship Without a Pedestal - Guiding while Still Becoming show art Mentorship Without a Pedestal - Guiding while Still Becoming

The Leadership Break

Episode 9 | Mentorship without a Pedestal – Guiding while still Becoming Mentorship is often portrayed as a polished exchange of wisdom — the expert guiding from a place of certainty. But real mentorship rarely looks like that. In this episode of The Leadership Break, Paula explores a more honest, human approach to mentoring: guiding others while you’re still growing yourself. This conversation is for seasoned, trusted leaders who’ve been asked to mentor — and quietly wondered if they’re really ready. You’ll hear why mentorship isn’t about having all the answers, but about...

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The Power of Staying: Leading when work feels ordinary show art The Power of Staying: Leading when work feels ordinary

The Leadership Break

Episode 8 | The Power of Staying: Leading When the Work Feels Ordinary In a culture that constantly celebrates what’s new, bold, and next, choosing to stay can feel uncomfortable — even irresponsible. Especially for leaders. We’re often told that growth means movement, reinvention, or a big leap forward. But what if that’s not always true? In this episode of The Leadership Break, Paula explores the quiet, often overlooked strength of staying. The seasons of leadership where the work feels ordinary, steady, or less visible — yet deeply meaningful. These are the moments when trust...

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The Moment You Outgrow a Role show art The Moment You Outgrow a Role

The Leadership Break

The Leadership Break Season 2, Episode 7 - The Moment You Outgrow a Role Episode Summary: How do you know when it’s time to grow, shift, or step into a new chapter of leadership? In this episode, Paula explores the subtle signals that show up long before we consciously realize we've outgrown a role — the restlessness, the quiet fatigue, the sense that our work no longer stretches us in the ways it once did. You’ll hear how to distinguish exhaustion from evolution, why “outgrowing” isn’t failure but feedback, and what healthy discernment looks like when you’re standing in a...

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More Episodes

The Leadership Break

Season 2, Episode 5 — When the Inner Critic Evolves

Episode Summary:

In this episode, Paula explores how self-talk changes as we grow in leadership. Rather than disappearing, the inner critic becomes quieter, more sophisticated, and often more believable. Paula shares why this matters, how to work with your inner voice, and a simple 4-step framework to shift self-talk from self-doubt to wisdom.

Key themes

  • The inner critic evolves with experience

  • Self-talk often signals transition—not inadequacy

  • Meaning + alignment become central questions

  • A 4-step practice to notice, get curious, find protection, and invite a wiser voice

Try this
At day’s end, ask:

  1. What did my inner voice say?

  2. What was it trying to protect?

  3. What truth can I offer instead?

 

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who could use a little more support in their leadership. And remember…

Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review wherever you listen to podcasts.  Is there something you’d like Paula to discuss?  Send her an email at paula@aiyanacoaching.com.

#Leadership #Mindset #ResilientLeadership #LeadingWithHeart

Music by Chris Collins, https://indiemusicbox.com/