252 - Two Hundred Fifty Two

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[TRANSCRIPT]

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“Picked citrus fruit”. That’s the next date. And my god, it feels like that was a million years ago, a different lifetime. 

Oh damn, I just realized…when I ditched the old car, I left Dean Martin’s suit in there. I’d also picked up a dress for Harry that I thought she’d look amazing—that I thought she’d like, um, not that I’m going to tell her that. But I am bummed about Dean’s suit. I liked that suit. 

Anyway, even though I remember the weeks I was in LA, I definitely didn’t remember the exact date I went around snatching everyone’s lemons and oranges. I was starting to worry that I wouldn’t be able to figure out what the next set of numbers are but then…well, I don’t know if you somehow knew this or you were just counting on me being a better diary-keeper than I am, but Harry’s attention to detail has saved the day. 

She’s…well, she’s kept a notebook of every single transmission I ever made. Or, at least, every transmission that she heard. It’s not like she transcribed everything I said, but she…she wrote the date, and where she thinks I was and little bits of what I talked about. If I mentioned her. She wouldn’t let me see the whole notebook, but I saw enough to know that. 

It’s…well, I’m grateful, I guess, that she did that, because it’s helping us now, but it’s galling to have your innermost thoughts laid out and catalogued in that way. And I know, I know, they weren’t my innermost thoughts, not when I was getting on here and talking about them to anyone who would listen. But I said…a lot over this past year. And I don’t know if Harry wrote down any of what she thought and felt about what I had to say but…

It’s useful, that’s the point. It’s good she did it, because I sure as hell don’t remember when I said or did most things, but also the fact that she did it at all is messing with my head a little bit. All those years of living together and feeling like she wasn’t really listening half the time and now this. 

I have to wonder if Fox has done the same thing. Written down every transmission I made and what I said. You must have, in order to give me a code in this way.                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Harry’s started to get worried that you’re leading us to Junior. That we are going to have to kill him. I told her there’d be no point to sending us on this weird memory lane wild goose chase if it was just going to end in the same confrontation but…

I think there’s still a part of her that’s hoping we’ll encounter him, honestly. I think she’s willing to do what I’m not. Well, I think she’s willing in theory. I think, if it came down to it, she wouldn’t be able to. It’s not…it’s not as easy as I think she thinks it is. Even as a matter of survival. Even if you know that person is fated to die. 

Because that’s the thing…he’s not fated to die. Not here. And I don’t know what kind of life he could have, but he does have a life here. And he should get to live it if he wants to, regardless of what happens to him in any other timeline, or whatever is ordained from on high. 

If you are leading us to Junior, I can’t imagine what your goal would be. You said interfering in the past had destroyed things so what are you hoping to accomplish now?

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Utah postcard. Keep you safe 

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You’re too late