DA393 | Dad Lessons From Kobe, Time-Energy-Attention, & Choosing People Over Accomplishments (John Olinger)

✅ Why Kobe chose carpool line over million-dollar meetings

✅ The "TEA" framework (Time, Energy, Attention) that will transform your fathering

✅ Simple practices like 10-minute wrestling time and Wine Wednesdays that create deep family connection

FULL SHOW NOTES:

SUMMARY

Life moves fast, and without intentional direction, we can end up achieving things that don't actually matter. In this episode, John Olinger—former Nike executive and global brand director for Kobe Bryant—shares how tragedy, transition, and the halfway point of life led him to redefine success. You'll hear about his "TEA" framework (Time, Energy, Attention), why Kobe chose carpool line over meetings, and how simple practices like 10-minute wrestling sessions and Wine Wednesdays can transform your family relationships.

TAKEAWAYS:

• Winning is subjective—you must define what success looks like for your family before you can achieve it
• Your Time, Energy, and Attention (TEA) are finite resources that must be strategically invested in what matters most
• The halfway point of life (around age 40) is a crucial inflection point for dads to pause and redirect toward meaningful priorities
• Quality connection moments with kids don't require huge time investments—10 minutes of wrestling or monthly birthday dates can be transformational
• Relationships matter more than accomplishments, and great stories require embracing challenge and difficulty
• Creating structured connection points (like Wine Wednesdays for marriage) protects what's most important from the chaos of daily life

QUOTES:

1. "Winning is subjective. And the only way you can win is if you get extremely clear about what it means to win." - John Olinger
2. "We're under attack all day long from distractions, our brains playing tricks on us about what things are fulfilling in the moment, going after short hits of dopamine, chasing success and accomplishments at the expense of other things." - John Olinger
3. "The reason why [Kobe] worked out at 4am was because he wanted to be there in the morning when his kids got up and before they went to school... At two o'clock, he's done. Hard stop. Why? He's got to go to the carpool line." - John Olinger
4. "Can you just pause and say, what's one thing that's simple that I could apply to point into the relationships with the people that matter the most to me?" - John Olinger
5. "If I'm halfway done, that means that every year for the rest of my life is gonna be between one and 2% of the remaining amount of my life. Do I wanna wait for later to do the things that are most important?" - John Olinger

GUEST

John Olinger is the author of "Worthy Wins: Pointing Your Life Toward What Matters Most" and a former Nike executive who served as global brand director for Kobe Bryant. After over a decade at Nike, John made a cross-country move with his family to Florida, choosing intentional fatherhood over corporate climbing. He and his wife have three boys (ages 10, 8, and 5) and are passionate about helping other parents define and pursue what truly matters most. John speaks and consults on leadership, purpose, and the intersection of success and significance.

LINKS:

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• "Worthy Wins: Pointing Your Life Toward What Matters Most" by John Olinger
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