Releasing the Dream Child and the Dream Parent Ep 5.42
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
In today's episode, we're talking about letting go of the dream of perfection for both you and your child. This topic comes with a trigger warning as we'll be discussing perfectionism and white supremacy culture. I find it interesting that I created this outline a year ago without fully knowing where this episode would go. But now, it feels perfectly aligned with this week's theme—white supremacy culture and perfectionism. As you listen, I invite you to take care of yourself. Get cozy, grab a notebook, and let's dive in. I'll start with a bold statement: Perfection is a myth. It's a...
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Are you doing your P.A.R.T.? Ep 5.41
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
In today's episode, we'll be talking about how you can ensure you're doing your P.A.R.T. This is an acronym by Seigel that I love, and I'm excited to dive into it today. We'll explore how doing your P.A.R.T. helps build trust and safety within your family. So, I invite you to get cozy, grab your notebook, and let's dig in! I'm thrilled to share this episode with you because it ties together everything we've been building throughout the season. It's like a pretty little bow wrapping up all the momentum we've created. Let's start by grounding ourselves. Positive parenting is a philosophy that...
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What does our “nervous system” do? Ep 5.40
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
In today’s episode, we'll be talking about what our nervous system does, and let me tell you, when it comes to behavior management and positive parenting, it plays a huge role. So, get cozy, grab your notebook, and let’s dig in! Alright, friends, we’re going to start by revisiting the concept of temperament, which we've discussed in the past few episodes. Temperament is a crucial factor that influences our attachment and how we interact with the world. As a reminder, temperament affects how we take in information, process our environment, regulate ourselves, and ultimately, how we...
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9 Traits of temperament E 5.39
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
Today's Episode: The Nine Traits of Temperament Why This Episode Matters: If there’s one episode you shouldn’t miss, this is it! We’ll explore the nine traits of temperament through an assessment from the book Raising Your Spirited Child. Get cozy, grab your notebook, and let's dig in. Key Question: What Is a Good Kid? We’ll start by examining this question, as posed in Raising Respectful Kids. It’s common to hear about the "fantasy" good kid—great listeners who follow instructions perfectly, enjoy the activities parents choose, do homework on time, and are always pleasant. Common...
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What is temperament? Ep 5.38
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
We're going to start today is by grounding back into the three factors that influence our attachment. As a reminder, attachment means the quality of the bond between parent and child, and those early attachment styles and bonds will influence all of their future relationships. Wow, that's a lot, but it's also such an opportunity because we can always learn, grow, and take intentional moves to do better. The three factors that influence attachment are: The quality of caregiving: As a parent coach, I help parents like you improve the quality of caregiving, including the tools, methods, and...
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What Impacts the Attachment Bond? Ep 5.37
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
This episode dives into 3 factors impacting the attachment bond. Grab your notebook and get comfortable, because we're getting deep! Picking up where we left off, let's explore what affects attachment. We discussed attachment qualities and how they build trust (or not) through repeated cycles of the child expressing needs, the caregiver interpreting them, and responding appropriately. We saw how a caregiver's actions can build or break trust, all within the framework of Attachment Theory (different from attachment parenting, as discussed in Season 5, Episode 27). The core of Attachment Theory...
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A good Relationship is a Secure Relationship Ep 5.36
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
Welcome to the final episode of our 8-part series on Attachment Theory, where we learn that a good relationship is a secure relationship. This episode is a recap of everything we've learned so far. Grab your notebook and get cozy – we're about to dive in! A big thank you to the listeners who followed along! If you've been listening to the entire series, I want to acknowledge the great work you've been doing. You've explored important concepts, made big shifts, and accepted some challenging invitations. Today's episode is all about why Attachment Theory matters. We'll discuss why...
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Unseeing Parent Ep 5.35
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
We are on the final episode of this eight-episode stretch, examining the difference between showing up in trusting ways and showing up in non-trusting ways through the aspects of feeling safe, feeling seen, feeling secure, and feeling soothed. We've been exploring these foundational steps to building a healthy relationship. When discussing attachment and attachment qualities, we're talking about the dance between rupture and repair in a strong relationship—making a mistake and working to repair it, messing up and fixing it, experiencing stress, and then finding soothing. It's this constant...
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The Seeing Parent Ep 5.34
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
In today's episode, we will be chatting about the qualities and characteristics of a secure parent. Whether this is your first time listening or you've been on this entire journey with me, we are nearing the end of our eight-episode stretch exploring the four qualities of secure attachment. So, I invite you to get cozy, grab your notebook, and let's dig in. Starting at the top, it's important to remember that strong relationships, especially between parent and child, involve a dance between rupture and repair, mistakes and reconnection, mess, and clean-up. The quality of this dance influences...
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Un-Soothing Parent Ep 5.33
MegAnne is NOT a parent, but...
We have made it to episode six of this episode stretch, talking through attachment theories and the quality of attachments, and how parents can show up to create a sense of trust or distrust. We've been going through, just talking about the foundations of what creates that connection in a relationship, and we are coming off of the foundation of attachment theory, where it states that strong relationships are that dance of rupture and repair. There are benign ruptures, meaning like little blips in the relationships, and then there are big ruptures that require major repair. The quality of that...
info_outlineInside this series exploring the four qualities of a secure attachment bond, we're discussing the dance between rupture and repair. Ruptures are mistakes, moments of dysregulation, outbursts, frustration, or anger.
These moments are natural and human. In a secure relationship, we come back together and do the repair work, recovering from those ruptures.
Therefore, when navigating attachment and building secure attachment, we become curious about the quality of our comfortability with rupture and repair. To remind everyone, attachment theory focuses on the quality of the attachment bond that affects your child's development – mentally, physically, intellectually, emotionally, and socially. Importantly, a caregiver's attachment to the child actually starts long before the child forms an attachment to the caregiver.
These attachments develop differently for each person. In my work, platform, classes, and this podcast, we shift your perspective as the parent or caregiver.
We elevate the child's perspective because in a secure relationship, we're looking at whether the child has a safe haven (or "safe face to land") to return to after a rupture.
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