Don’t Learn This Too Late: Ways to Stay Connected After Kids: Episode 411
EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Release Date: 08/26/2025
EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
The holidays are supposed to feel relaxing and joyful. But for many couples, they’re anything but. Between travel plans, family visits, and unspoken expectations, this season can quickly become chaotic, exhausting, and full of tension. One partner often ends up feeling like they’re carrying most of the mental and emotional load, while the other doesn’t realize how unbalanced it feels. In this episode, we’re unpacking the real root of holiday stress in relationships: mismatched and unmet expectations. You’ll hear the kinds of conversations you need to have to prevent disconnection and...
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Have you ever shared an idea or dream with your spouse, something that genuinely excited you, only to have the energy immediately flattened by practicality or fear? In this episode, we’re unpacking a dynamic that quietly drains energy and connection in many marriages: when one partner is in enthusiastic, imaginative energy and the other instantly shifts into logic and control mode. We’ll explore why this happens, what it reveals emotionally for each partner, and how to respond in a way that keeps the energy between you alive instead of shutting it down. In this episode you’ll hear: The...
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
As the holiday season approaches, many couples find themselves hitting a quiet but undeniable breaking point. Something about this stretch of time—from mid-October through the new year—brings things to the surface. Maybe it’s the reflection that comes with the end of a year. Maybe it’s the pressure of finances, family expectations, or feeling like life is flying by. But without the closeness you hoped to feel by now. For many, it’s a season where the question “Can we really keep going like this?” starts to creep in. In this episode, we unpack a question so many couples wrestle...
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Have you ever thought about how your own stress affects your kids — or how your parents’ stress might still be affecting you? In this powerful conversation with Dr. Taz Bhatia, integrative medicine physician, author, and founder of Hol+, we explore how the health of the parents — especially the mother — sets the tone for the entire family system. Because wellness isn’t just about self-care… it’s about the legacy you’re creating for the next generation. Together, we unpack how patterns of anger, overwhelm, and chronic stress get passed down in families — and how to...
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
It seems like the “I need more space” and “I need to talk this out now” partners always find each other! This is the basis of the Pursuer/Withdrawer as well as the Anxious/Avoidant partner dynamics in marriage. When this dynamic happens, it always causes more tension, defensiveness, anxiety, and distance than the initial topic of conversation. If this sounds at all like dynamics you and your partner get into, you certainly are not alone! In today’s episode you will hear more detail about what’s really happening for each partner, whether it is the need for space or resolution....
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Division isn’t just a problem in the world—it’s creeping into homes, marriages, and families everywhere. When couples start turning against each other instead of standing together, the bond that once felt safe and secure begins to weaken. In this episode, we’re breaking down The 4 D’s That Create Division in a Marriage: Dismissiveness, Defensiveness, Deflecting, and Divorce Threats. These subtle but destructive patterns slowly undermine connection and emotional safety, often without you even realizing it. We’ll clearly define what each of these behaviors looks and sounds like—and...
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Many times in marriage, you can start what you think is a simple conversation and have it turn into a miscommunication or even a conflict. It is frustrating when you are trying to simply communicate something and it isn’t received by your partner. In this episode we talk about the difference between productive and unproductive communication and what makes partners good communicators vs poor communicators. You will be surprised by the simple shift you can make and the massive difference it will make in how you each speak and listen to one another. To dive further into the source...
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
When emotions run high in marriage, one of the most common traps couples fall into is what to do with each other’s feelings. Should you validate them? Should you challenge them? Or should you just offer a quick solution so you can move on? The truth is when emotional validation is missing or misunderstood, small hurts linger, conflicts spiral, and one or both partners can end up feeling dismissed, forced into solutions, or left unresolved. It’s also one of the biggest complaints we hear from spouses…”you’re not validating my feelings!” In this episode, we unpack: Why...
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
After our recent intimacy series, there were dozens of follow up questions from you all asking us to dive further into normal hormonal changes as we age and proactive steps you can take to age gracefully AND stay connected through the changes. In this episode, double board-certified physician Dr. Amy Shah (women’s health & nutrition) joins us to bust the “dad bod/mom bod is just aging” myth—and lay out practical, evidence-informed steps couples can use to sleep better, reduce stress, protect libido, and stay united through perimenopause, menopause, and men’s steady...
info_outlineEmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Are we getting too self-focused in marriage? In this episode, we unpack the cultural messages that push hyper-individualism (“fill your cup first”) and show why great marriages are actually built on mutual care, not solo self-care. We talk about healthy vs. overcorrected boundaries, why prosocial actions (doing good for your partner) boost your own mood, how to shift from short-term impulses to a long-term family vision, and practical ways to “out-love” each other in daily life. What you’ll learn from this episode: The trap of “me first” and how it quietly erodes...
info_outlineMarriage after kids can feel like survival mode. Once out of the immediate chaos, it can settle into a state of function. Between diapers, school runs, shuttling to sports practices, your work, and endless to-do lists at home, it’s easy to put your relationship on the back burner. But here’s the truth: your kids don’t just thrive on how well you care for them—they thrive on how connected YOU are as a couple.
In this episode of the Empowered Couples Podcast, Jocelyn & Aaron (“The Freemans”) share practical, real-life ways to stay emotionally and physically connected after kids. You’ll learn how to move beyond just “functioning” as roommates and bring back fulfillment, intimacy, and spark in your marriage before it’s too late.
If you’ve ever felt the distance growing, this conversation will give you hope and concrete steps you can implement today.
From this episode you’ll walk away with:
- How to make daily emotional check-ins that go beyond “How was your day?”
- Why non-sexual touch matters (and how to bring it back without pressure)
- Simple ways to make family dinners and daily routines bonding moments
- How to prioritize weekly and yearly quality time as a couple
- Why your kids benefit most when YOU thrive together
Don’t just survive marriage after kids—reignite the connection that makes everything else in family life easier. Not only is this for your own satisfaction, but critical for what you then model to your kids.
Want to reignite the spark and feel truly connected again? Join the Best of Us 30-Day Couples Challenge—a proven path to bring back emotional closeness, intimacy, and joy in your marriage. Enrollment only opens a few times per year, so don’t miss this round: https://mycoupleschallenge.com/best 👈
If This Episode Resonated, Don’t Forget to:
-Subscribe for weekly episodes
-Leave a rating & review to support the show
-Share this episode with a couple who needs encouragement
Episode Topics Timestamp:
00:08 – Why putting your relationship on the back burner hurts your kids too
00:09:50 – The emotional wall couples feel after building the “dream life”
00:10:38 – Why dissatisfaction peaks around the 10-year mark (and how to avoid it)
00:13:37 – Connection is what makes parenting and life easier
00:14:00 – Step 1: Daily emotional check-ins (not just logistics)
00:19:18 – Step 2: Non-sexual touch & physical affection
00:23:59 – Why kids need to SEE your love, not just receive it
00:25:02 – Special edition: The Best of Us 30-Day Challenge
00:28:11 – Step 3: Make family dinners intentional & device-free
00:32:57 – Step 4: Weekly marriage nights (beyond TV time)
00:34:44 – Step 5: Yearly getaways & bucket list adventures together
00:37:24 – The danger of drifting apart slowly
00:39:34 – Kids notice everything—why your marriage is their model
00:41:26 – Final encouragement & invitation to reignite your spark