ProCo 272: Don't Spend the Night in Beast City - Beast Games
Professional Contestants
*stumbles out of a cave squinting into the light of day* How long has it been? What year is it?? The new Pope is from Chicago?!?! Wow, we sure have a lot to catch up on, but lets start with the most important thing. Game shows have somehow found yet another way to confuse and dissapoint us. Just when we think we have seen it all, Mr. Beast - the modern day equivilant of a wealthy emperor who throws money at the poor for his amusement - has created a game show where he basically throws money at the poor for his amusement. It's time to force ourselves to learn about Gen Z's favorite...
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ProCo 271: OSHA's Eleven - Caesars Challenge
Professional Contestants
We've been doing a lot of newer, shinier, well polished game shows lately. Now depending on who you ask, that could be a good thing or a bad thing. Sure, modern day streaming services offer a sort of quality guarantee with the programs they include - but only on YouTube will you be able to find a VHS quality recording of Ahmad Rashad and a Roman Centurion hosting a word jumble themed game show at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas. So now that we know that that existed, there's nothing left for us to do but rob them blind. Zach does a live word jumble, Jared rekindles our old obsession, and Adam is...
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ProCo 270: The Accumulated Sins of Joey Tribbiani - Fast Friends
Professional Contestants
Hello dear listeners! We're back after a longer than usual holiday hiatus, and this episode you're in for a real treat. Oh, no it isn't a good game show. Statistically those don't actually exist. No, this episode we are going to rage out on the set of beloved sitcom Friends and break everything in Monica's apartment. Isn't that just such a better idea than actually trying to win this game show? We think so too. Zach met himself from the future, Jared soft launches a new segment about local goverenment, and Adam asserts that there are statistically zero good game shows. Talking Points Include:...
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ProCo 269: The Yule Hog - Rocket Around the Xmas Tree
Professional Contestants
Happy Holiday everyone! We truly hope that you and the friends and family that you spend this time of the year with are happy and healthy - celebrating the true meaning of the holidays. But maybe you are not... Maybe you're celebrating with someone who has lost sight of the reason for the season. Someone who needs their statis quo disrupted in order to appreciate what they really have. If that's the case, you better watch out, because there's a new holiday icon in town. A real, tangible pig who would love nothing more than to absolutely decimate your misguided holiday celebration. Keep an eye...
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ProCo 268: My Wife Took the Dog in the Divorce - Finding Mr. Christmas
Professional Contestants
Well folks, we've once again gone straight from Snake Day into the winter holiday celebrations, but thats just how the holiday calander shakes out sometimes. But let's not let that proximity get in the way of us fully diving into the holiday season with the most sickeningly Christmas steeped game show we may have ever done. Thats right, a Christmas themed competition game show produced BY Hallmark, FOR the Hallmark channel, with the prize being a STARING ROLL in a Hallmark Christmas movie. If you weren't in the Christmas spirit before, you best bet your baubles that you're about to be! Zach...
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ProCo 267: SAW Team Six - Saw: The Final Chapter
Professional Contestants
It may be because we have had to watch seven of these movies, seven years in a row. It may be because we put it off for so long that we had to watch it during Thanksgiving instead of in October. It may just be the way the series goes. But this may truly have been the worst Saw movie we have experienced so far. Not only that, but at this point the traps are so avoidable we don't even have to spend much time strategizing. That way we have more time to misremember the plots of all the previous movies and complain about how we hate the one we just watched. And isn't that really what you come here...
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ProCo 266: The Hamlet Witch Project - Fear
Professional Contestants
Welcome back to another installment in our Snake With Big Teeth 2024 celebration. This time we watched a game show where literally nothing happens. Like, truly... nothing. So get ready for an episode that is half discussing the extended universe of Sonic the Hedgehog and half discussing Shakespeare's timeless classic Hamlet. Do we blur the lines between those two worlds? You'll have to listen to find out! (But I mean, yeah. Of course we do.) Zach liked Ghost Whisperer for the plot, Jared adds a new Haunted House Rule™, and Adam is definitely Tails. Talking Points Include: What Happened To...
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ProCo 265: Mouse in the House - The Traitors
Professional Contestants
The Traitors - It's a hit new reality game show. Not just that, at it's core it is a classic party game we have all played. Call it mafia, call it werewolf - everyone knows it and everyone thinks they're good at it. But what have people forgotten? That's right, the classic 1997 film Mouse Hunt. Against all odds that mouse comes out on top, and when everyone else forgets, we harvest top notch strategy to implement at Alan Cumming's stately Scottish castle. Zach has new finger bling, Jared still really wants to celebrate the solstices, and Adam is angry about reality stars. Talking Points...
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ProCo 264: Santa's Dirty New Deal - That Awkward Game Show
Professional Contestants
Sometimes game shows are just easy to cheat at. Like, truly so easy that it would be more difficult to not do so. Like, I'm serious guys, there would be absolutely no chance that anyone invovled in the game show would be able to catch us, let alone prove that we had cheated. This one's an absolute gimmie. But dammit if we're not gonna basically ignore that fact entirely and come up with a convoluted way of getting Santa to pose as our dad instead. Zach insists he knows intimite secrets about Santa, Jared lets us into his mind palace, and Adam has an encounter that leaves him a changed man....
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ProCo 263: He Spy - Pictureka
Professional Contestants
There are numerous ways we could approach a game show where we have to run around searching for illustrations of wacky characters. We could create a bunch of our own illustrations and sneak them into the lineup. We could mark the answers with invisible ink you can only see under a blacklight. Hell, we could just study with flashcards. But don't work, Zach is just gonna win this one for us. Haven't you heard? He's really good at finding things. Just trust him. Zach is an older 29, Jared is the oldest 29 , and Adam is the youngest 29. Talking Points Include: The Oldest Age There Is, Snowden vs...
info_outlineFor years, game show producers have been asking the same question over and over: How can I make a boring game interesting for people to watch on television. Like Bingo, for example. Can it make a good game show? As it turns out, no. But if you make it colorful, musical, bilingual, and add a charming host and some salsa dancers you sure can come close.
Zach had a perverse Spotify Wrapped, Jared didn't know people could play multiple instruments, and Adam wants Raven Simone in Smash Brothers.
Talking Points Include: A Big Captain Jack Year, Sad Movie Talk, Kong In Charge, Game Shows Oompa Loompas, TikTok Live, Grinch Turned Off Body Cam, The Monty Hall Problem, Cheating At Bingo, Groundhog Day Meets National Treasure