How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge with Melody Wilding
The Remarkable Leadership Podcast
Release Date: 05/07/2025
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info_outlineDo you know how to effectively communicate with someone in a higher position, such as your boss, a board, or anyone in a position of authority? Kevin welcomes Melody Wilding, who shares strategies and conversation frameworks to help professionals at all levels navigate complex relationships with their leaders. Melody and Kevin discuss the concept of “managing up”; not as sucking-up or people-pleasing, but to take ownership of your success by fostering productive and respectful relationships with those in charge. They also discuss the critical conversations outlined in her book and dive into three in particular: the boundaries conversation, the feedback conversation, and the styles conversation. Melody emphasizes the "triple win" philosophy, which focuses on finding solutions that benefit you, your boss, and the organization. She offers practical advice for leaders on how to facilitate managing up for their team members, such as asking, "What do you need from me?"
Listen For
00:00 Introduction
01:23 Guest Introduction: Melody Wilding
02:16 Welcome and Opening Question
03:05 The Psychology of Managing Up
04:11 Everyone Has a Boss
05:18 The “Why Isn’t My Boss in This Class?” Problem
06:08 Managing Up Isn’t About Excusing Bad Leadership
07:11 Managing Up Is for You
08:20 The 10 Conversations Framework
09:01 Boundaries Conversation
10:28 Setting Expectations and Clarifying Priorities
12:06 Creating Win-Win Outcomes
14:20 Feedback Conversation
16:25 Building Trust Through Positive Feedback
17:27 From Labels to Behavior: The ABC Model
19:33 Constructive Proposals, Not Complaints
20:28 Styles Conversation
22:49 It’s About Them, Not You
24:54 Avoiding Labels and Confirmation Bias
26:05 Meet the Needs of Your Boss
27:09 Ethical Visibility and Remote Work
28:37 Help Your Boss Help You
29:42 Make it Easier for People to Manage Up to You
30:38 One-on-Ones as Strategic Tools
32:14 The Leadership Book Question
33:12 What Do You Do for Fun
34:23 Learn More: ManagingUp.com
35:15 Final Thoughts: What Will You Do
Melody's Story: Melody Wilding is the bestselling author of Trust Yourself: Stop
Overthinking and Channel Your Emotions for Success at Work and Managing Up: How to Get What You Need from the People in Charge. She is a licensed social worker with a master’s degree from Columbia University, a professor of human behavior at Hunter College in New York City, and a former emotions researcher at Rutgers University. For more than a decade, she’s helped top performers and leadership at the world’s most successful companies to communicate more clearly, prevent burnout, and transform complicated workplace dynamics into powerful alliances that impact the bottom line. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and The Washington Post, to name a few. She’s a regular contributor to Harvard Business Review, Forbes, Fast Company, and CNBC.
https://www.instagram.com/melodywilding/
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