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310. How smartphones really affect kids' mental health: Surprising findings from cutting-edge research with Dr. Wendy Rote

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Release Date: 05/27/2025

333. Q&A: What should I do if my child hears the N-word in a song? show art 333. Q&A: What should I do if my child hears the N-word in a song?

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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...   Whether or not to address a racial slur your child heard in a song when you're not sure whether or not they picked up on it, and fear you may call attention to it unnecessarily. How to explain the difference between swearing and slurs, and the importance of giving kids context and language around both. Dr. Rebecca shares stories of how similar topics have come up in her own family and how she handled them with her kids. Why just saying "don't...

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332. The grandparent transition: Managing emotions, roles and boundaries with Carol Merle-Fishman show art 332. The grandparent transition: Managing emotions, roles and boundaries with Carol Merle-Fishman

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Becoming a grandparent is a major shift and yet, it’s rarely talked about in a way that honors the complexity of this role. In this episode, I’m joined by Carol Merle-Fishman to explore the emotional, psychological, and relational shifts that occur when someone becomes a grandparent and how this transition can impact the entire family system.   Together we unpack:   Why grandparenthood is actually a developmental stage of its own. How expectations, unspoken grief, and shifting identities can create tension or disconnection in relationships. Ways adult children can support...

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331. Q&A: My sensitive kid got the 331. Q&A: My sensitive kid got the "strict" teacher and I'm worried they won't vibe. Is there anything I can do as a parent to help?

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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...   What to do if your child is assigned a teacher whose style may not seem like the best match. How to advocate for your child in a way that supports collaboration and avoids conflict. Why starting the school year with a proactive email to the teacher can set the tone for a strong partnership. The surprising benefits a strict or “old school” teacher might actually offer sensitive kids. How to prepare your child to advocate for themselves,...

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330. When your child says ‘I hate myself’: Helping sensitive kids build self-esteem and get out of a cycle of self-criticism with Dr. Blaise Aguirre show art 330. When your child says ‘I hate myself’: Helping sensitive kids build self-esteem and get out of a cycle of self-criticism with Dr. Blaise Aguirre

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Psychiatrist, author, and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) expert Dr. Blaise Aguirre joins me to talk about how we can help kids—especially emotionally sensitive ones—understand, process, and reframe internalized messages of self-criticism and even self-hatred.   Together we explore:   Why even well-loved and supported kids can develop a sense of being “unlovable” How emotional sensitivity can make children more vulnerable to misattunement, comparisons, and internalized shame The difference between skills-based therapy (like DBT) and addressing the deeper emotional...

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329. Q&A: Is my child anxious or just sensitive? Or could it be both? show art 329. Q&A: Is my child anxious or just sensitive? Or could it be both?

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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...   Regardless of whether your child is experiencing sensory sensitivities or anxiety, our goal is the same - helping you define exactly what that goal is. Where do anxiety and sensory sensitivities overlap? (Spoiler: A lot of this boils down to nervous system regulation.) How you can help your child understand what their unique triggers are and the tools and strategies that can help them navigate these without so much distress. What to consider to help you if it’s...

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328. The neuroscience of raising emotionally resilient kids: Supporting your child’s emotional growth and regulation with Dr. Kristen Lindquist show art 328. The neuroscience of raising emotionally resilient kids: Supporting your child’s emotional growth and regulation with Dr. Kristen Lindquist

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Neuroscientist and psychologist Dr. Kristen Lindquist joins me for a fascinating conversation about how children develop emotional regulation — and how we as parents can support that growth not just through what we say, but how and when we say it.   Together we explore: Why the ability to feel and name emotions is something children build slowly over time — and what role parents play in that process. What neuroscience reveals about how the brain develops emotional literacy from infancy through adolescence (and even into adulthood!) How emotion regulation is like a...

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327. Q&A: What’s the best way to explain and prepare my toddler for my upcoming surgery without scaring them? show art 327. Q&A: What’s the best way to explain and prepare my toddler for my upcoming surgery without scaring them?

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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...   How to prepare a toddler for a parent’s surgery or temporary physical limitations in a way that is honest, concrete, and not scary. Creative, developmentally appropriate ways to help your child understand and process upcoming changes to routines—like playtime, bedtime, or physical closeness. The power of play, role-playing with toys, and using analogies to help kids grasp abstract concepts. What to expect behaviorally from your child during your recovery and...

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326. When your partner feels like a roommate: Why couples can feel disconnected after kids and what to do to reconnect with Chelsea Skaggs show art 326. When your partner feels like a roommate: Why couples can feel disconnected after kids and what to do to reconnect with Chelsea Skaggs

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Chelsea Skaggs is here to talk about how couples can keep your romantic relationship strong as you move beyond from early stages of survival mode deeper into parenthood.   Together we explore:   How the demands of parenting shift as your children grow, and what that means for your romantic connection. Tips for getting your partner on board if only one of you feels ready to work on deepening your connection. Simple and practical strategies for attuning to your partner and "reading" the room for your best chance of success feeling a deepened connection. Navigating mismatched energy...

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325. Q&A: What should I do if my partner and I disagree on how to handle our child’s ADHD? show art 325. Q&A: What should I do if my partner and I disagree on how to handle our child’s ADHD?

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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...     What you can do if you’re wondering: “Is my kid’s ADHD diagnosis real or do I have an active 10-year-old kid?” How to evaluate the accuracy of a diagnosis and what steps to take if you’re unsure or want a second opinion. Practical tools you can use to support your child—diagnosis or not. Strategies for becoming more aligned with your partner on how to handle parenting challenges and support your child's needs. What is a...

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324. Peaceful Parenting strategies for navigating tantrums, big feelings, screen time and more with Dr. Laura Markham show art 324. Peaceful Parenting strategies for navigating tantrums, big feelings, screen time and more with Dr. Laura Markham

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Clinical psychologist and author of the bestselling Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids, Dr. Laura Markham joins me for a rich conversation about what peaceful parenting really means — and how it can help you set firm, loving limits while staying deeply connected to your child.   Together we explore:   Why connection, not control, is the true foundation of cooperation and emotional resilience.   What setting limits with empathy looks like in real life (and why it’s not the same as being permissive).   The surprising way laughter can help your child...

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More Episodes

Dr. Wendy Rote is joining me to unpack some surprising and even counterintuitive findings about kids, smartphones, and social media. She and her team are in the middle of a groundbreaking longitudinal study following tweens over time, giving us rare insight into how technology is shaping the mental health and identity development of Generation Alpha.

 

Together we explore:

 

  • Why the question “Is social media making kids depressed?” might be the wrong one to ask and what we should be asking instead.

  • A finding that might shock you: Kids with smartphones actually show better physical and mental health outcomes in some key areas.

  • What kind of social media behaviors are linked to more depressive symptoms and why it’s not as simple as “time spent online.”

  • How compulsive checking could be a major mental health red flag that parents often miss.

  • New, not-yet-published finding on the real impact school cell phone bans have been shown to have on kids.

  • Why do some kids without phones actually report more cyberbullying and what that might reveal about exclusion and social dynamics?

  • The one tech rule that makes the biggest difference in kids’ well-being that has a greater impact that time limits and parental control setting.

 

If you’ve ever worried about screen time, debated a phone ban, or felt unsure how to support your child’s relationship with tech, this conversation will give you fresh perspective, surprising data, and tangible guidance rooted in real research.

 

LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:

👉🏻 Learn more about Dr. Wendy Rote's research on ResearchGate and Google Scholar

 

REVIEW THE STUDY:

📚 Life In Media Survey

 

ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

📚 The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness by Jonathan Haidt

 

🎧 Regulation, reward systems, and rest: Rewiring the way our kids interact with screens with Alé Duarte

 

MORE PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 264. The hidden dangers of EdTech: How technology in schools impacts learning, child development, and mental health with Andy Liddell

 

🎧 242. Have phones displaced our ability to play and have fun? How to be intentional with your tech use with Catherine Price

 

🎧 103. Secure attachment vs. social media: Navigating their effects on body image from early childhood to teen years with Dr. Miriam Steele