316. Self-compassion, critical thinking, and connection: What the research reveals about raising capable kids with Melinda Wenner Moyer
Release Date: 06/17/2025
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... Whether or not to address a racial slur your child heard in a song when you're not sure whether or not they picked up on it, and fear you may call attention to it unnecessarily. How to explain the difference between swearing and slurs, and the importance of giving kids context and language around both. Dr. Rebecca shares stories of how similar topics have come up in her own family and how she handled them with her kids. Why just saying "don't...
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Becoming a grandparent is a major shift and yet, it’s rarely talked about in a way that honors the complexity of this role. In this episode, I’m joined by Carol Merle-Fishman to explore the emotional, psychological, and relational shifts that occur when someone becomes a grandparent and how this transition can impact the entire family system. Together we unpack: Why grandparenthood is actually a developmental stage of its own. How expectations, unspoken grief, and shifting identities can create tension or disconnection in relationships. Ways adult children can support...
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... What to do if your child is assigned a teacher whose style may not seem like the best match. How to advocate for your child in a way that supports collaboration and avoids conflict. Why starting the school year with a proactive email to the teacher can set the tone for a strong partnership. The surprising benefits a strict or “old school” teacher might actually offer sensitive kids. How to prepare your child to advocate for themselves,...
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Psychiatrist, author, and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) expert Dr. Blaise Aguirre joins me to talk about how we can help kids—especially emotionally sensitive ones—understand, process, and reframe internalized messages of self-criticism and even self-hatred. Together we explore: Why even well-loved and supported kids can develop a sense of being “unlovable” How emotional sensitivity can make children more vulnerable to misattunement, comparisons, and internalized shame The difference between skills-based therapy (like DBT) and addressing the deeper emotional...
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... Regardless of whether your child is experiencing sensory sensitivities or anxiety, our goal is the same - helping you define exactly what that goal is. Where do anxiety and sensory sensitivities overlap? (Spoiler: A lot of this boils down to nervous system regulation.) How you can help your child understand what their unique triggers are and the tools and strategies that can help them navigate these without so much distress. What to consider to help you if it’s...
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Neuroscientist and psychologist Dr. Kristen Lindquist joins me for a fascinating conversation about how children develop emotional regulation — and how we as parents can support that growth not just through what we say, but how and when we say it. Together we explore: Why the ability to feel and name emotions is something children build slowly over time — and what role parents play in that process. What neuroscience reveals about how the brain develops emotional literacy from infancy through adolescence (and even into adulthood!) How emotion regulation is like a...
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... How to prepare a toddler for a parent’s surgery or temporary physical limitations in a way that is honest, concrete, and not scary. Creative, developmentally appropriate ways to help your child understand and process upcoming changes to routines—like playtime, bedtime, or physical closeness. The power of play, role-playing with toys, and using analogies to help kids grasp abstract concepts. What to expect behaviorally from your child during your recovery and...
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Chelsea Skaggs is here to talk about how couples can keep your romantic relationship strong as you move beyond from early stages of survival mode deeper into parenthood. Together we explore: How the demands of parenting shift as your children grow, and what that means for your romantic connection. Tips for getting your partner on board if only one of you feels ready to work on deepening your connection. Simple and practical strategies for attuning to your partner and "reading" the room for your best chance of success feeling a deepened connection. Navigating mismatched energy...
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about... What you can do if you’re wondering: “Is my kid’s ADHD diagnosis real or do I have an active 10-year-old kid?” How to evaluate the accuracy of a diagnosis and what steps to take if you’re unsure or want a second opinion. Practical tools you can use to support your child—diagnosis or not. Strategies for becoming more aligned with your partner on how to handle parenting challenges and support your child's needs. What is a...
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Clinical psychologist and author of the bestselling Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids, Dr. Laura Markham joins me for a rich conversation about what peaceful parenting really means — and how it can help you set firm, loving limits while staying deeply connected to your child. Together we explore: Why connection, not control, is the true foundation of cooperation and emotional resilience. What setting limits with empathy looks like in real life (and why it’s not the same as being permissive). The surprising way laughter can help your child...
info_outlineMelinda Wenner Moyer, author of the new book Hello, Cruel World! joins me to break down the most essential skills kids need to thrive in today's complicated times.
Together we explore:
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The three powerful themes Melinda saw again and again in her research and how you can tap into these to help you be more effective in your parenting.
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Practical and realistic ways to help kids feel truly seen and heard.
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How slowing down, staying curious, and fostering a growth mindset isn’t just for kids, but for parents too.
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The surprising power of guiding children to discover answers on their own—and how this can actually build critical neural circuitry in their brains
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A simple, impactful question you can ask your child to help them reflect and learn to trust their own judgment.
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The critical yet often overlooked role of self-compassion in mental health, and the three key components of self-compassion every parent should know.
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What it really means when kids say things like “I hate myself” or “I shouldn’t be part of this family,” and how to respond with empathy.
If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by the pressures of modern parenting or worried about helping your child manage their feelings and decisions, this episode offers research-backed, actionable wisdom you won’t want to miss.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
✨ https://www.melindawennermoyer.com/
READ HER BOOKS:
📚 Hello, Cruel World!: Science-Based Strategies for Raising Terrific Kids in Terrifying Times
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 268. A deep dive on parental burnout: What it is, why it happens, and how to overcome it