Ep 2 | SGW: Xena | S1-2 | Scotts of War: Synoris or WWE Arm Muscles?
Release Date: 05/17/2017
Ep 10.2 | SGW: Xena | S1-10 | Bird-Beak Tipped Centaur Dick Staff: Cher’s New Water-Fast Diet (Big Trouble in Little ☆☆☆ Michelin Tooth Gap China)
Such Good Words
The erotic conclusion to S1-10 - Cher's throat learns how to drive, and we meet Benjamin Oats in a dream/vision quest /driving lesson. Let's watch. Let's also write some fucking reviews guys. Guys?
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Ep 10.1 | SGW: Xena | S1-10 | Bird-Beak Tipped Centaur Dick Staff: Cher’s New Water-Fast Diet (Big Trouble in Little ☆☆☆ Michelin Tooth Gap China)
Such Good Words
Xena and Gabrielle strike oil, and the guy who played Ernest (who was definitely not dead when this was being filmed) helps them negotiate land rights with a local tribe of fussy women. Meanwhile, Cher secretly binges on more water than she says she normally drinks (bitch), and something/nothing to do with centaurs. Why not.
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Ep 9.2 | SGW: Xena | S1-9 | That One Where Gabrielle Tried To Fuck A Dead Guy (Gabrielle’s Impossibly Unsyncable Ovulation Cycle) / Xena Retrieves Hades’ Real-Doll (Sisyphus Eternally Rolls a Boulder, Except the Boulder is Rats)
Such Good Words
The thrilling conclusion of SGW | Xena | S1-9, maybe. Broccoli gets a shout out at the end, and in an unwanted twist, you find out that you've been inside the podcast the whole time.
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Ep 9.1 | SGW: Xena | S1-9 | That One Where Gabrielle Tried To Fuck A Dead Guy (Gabrielle’s Impossibly Unsyncable Ovulation Cycle) / Xena Retrieves Hades’ Real-Doll (Sisyphus Eternally Rolls a Boulder, Except the Boulder is Rats)
Such Good Words
In an unexpected twist, Gabrielle’s ovulation is transformed into a scented candle, and we’re introduced to and immediately forget Sisyphus (so forgettable). Gabrielle tries to get slammed by a terminally ill acne-survivor. He dies. Celeste (also ovulating) gobbles down the leftovers.
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Ep 8.2 | SGW: Xena | S1-8 | Cave of Hephaestus New Employee Orientation (Active Shooter Training Emphasis): Xena’s Chakram Also Could Have Cut Those Chains (You Selfish Whore)
Such Good Words
Xena and Gabrielle try double dating (why not), but coincidentally end up time traveling and engaging in friction-heavy such and such, with alternative, trans-gendered, post-op versions of themselves. The date doesn’t go well. Also a malth shop (look it up) that we have a reasonable level of enthusiasm for as adults is about to close we gotta’ go. Karaoke disaster is in this one, probably.
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Ep 8.1 | SGW: Xena | S1-8 | Cave of Hephaestus New Employee Orientation (Active Shooter Training Emphasis): Xena’s Chakram Also Could Have Cut Those Chains (You Selfish Whore)
Such Good Words
Xena and Gabrielle try double dating (why not), but coincidentally end up time traveling and engaging in friction-heavy such and such, with alternative, trans-gendered, post-op versions of themselves. The date doesn’t go well. Also a malth shop (look it up) that we have a reasonable level of enthusiasm for as adults is about to close we gotta’ go.
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Ep 7 | SGW: Xena | S1-7 | Sort of Impressive 40’ Titans, I Guess: Fussy Bola-Scrote
Such Good Words
Things get real (finally) when Gabrielle turns into a small bird, knowingly, but then complains a lot about the experience. She and the most fashion forward dinos from The Land Before Time roll their eyes at Scientology, and realize they’ve been confusing shitting for eating this whole time. （ ﾟ Дﾟ)
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Ep 6 | SGW: Xena | S1-6 | The Case of Village Idiots v. Gabrielle Atticus Finch: Tasteful Dungeon Subsidies & Ares’ Ass-Baby
Such Good Words
Xena rents a boat, but soon discovers that the high seas aren't all they're cracked up to be. Ares is suddenly stricken with a bout severe depression, and takes to marathoning the entirety of All My Children. Gabrielle attempts to pass the bar (she fails).
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Ep 5 | SGW: Xena | S1-5 | Sword-wielding Clitoris: Xena’s Relapse
Such Good Words
Xena joins forces with Sloth and the fat kid from The Goonies, and they set out to get nails done with Princess Lollipop. Unfortunately, an arms merchant with a penchant for sodomy refuses to honor their groupons for 50% off nail decals (they pay for the nails anyway). Also we meet a nice foot bath.
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Ep 4 | SGW: Xena | S1-4 | Nemo Kills a Beibeh: Hope is an Empty Box
Such Good Words
Xena and Gabrielle pull a full on baby-Moses heist, we meet Pandora and discover her complex choking and horse fetish, and that fish from the Pixar movies swims faster than any of us thought possible - even out of water (what's that all about).
info_outlineXena is hit with an arrow, and falls hard for a mute baby and her dead mother's seed sower. Meanwhile, Gabrielle opens a small but honest sports bar, and gets locked in the storage closet after all the other employees go home - oh no! We learn a lot about construction from child laborers. Hilarity ensues.