Libsyn Directory

Dedicated To The Most Handsome Woman |12

Release Date: 11/19/2016

Thanks for Glistening!

Well, we’re back! Did you miss us? We definitely missed you. This week we are catching each other up and discussing what friendship looks like after 30. We’re also unpacking Kirsten Dunst’s career, and so much more

Tingles Down My Spine | 22

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Hello, Glisteners! Wow, you look amazing. We are so happy to see you. This week we discuss our love for ASMR YouTube videos and Spirit Payton, the ASMR star that eats pickles for a living. We’ll introduce you to the viral phenomenon that is Mukbang, where people film themselves overeating and get praise for doing so. It’s so fierce. Additionally, we share how we recovered from our latest mini-nervous breakdowns.

Weekend at Bernie's the Musical | 21

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We are so so so happy to be back in your hearts and homes once again. This week we discuss Luann de Lesseps and her drunken battery case, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child on Broadway and what we are wearing to our funerals.

Ep. 21| Weekend at Bernie's the Musical

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Surrounded by people and totally alone. | 20

Thanks for Glistening!

Juan and Sloane are so happy to be back in your hearts and minds. Thanks for Glistening is your home for hilarity, celebrity gossip, news, ridiculousness, and malarkey. Each week your hosts, Sloane Steel and Juan Torres-Falcon talk at you until they get tired. This week they tackle Omarosa Manigault Newman, Meghan Markle’s Father, loneliness and weight gain. Stay a while! xoxo, Juan and Sloane, @juanthatyouwant and @iamsloanesteel, respectively.

The dingo left my baby alone. | 19

Thanks for Glistening!

DOLLY WILL NEVER GO AWAY AGAIN. We are back from maternity leave and our feet are still swollen. We catch all the way up and get ready for the rest of our lives together. Sloane tells us how cute her baby is and what motherhood is really like. Juan tells us about his new endeavors and his greatest fear at the moment.

Beauty and the BE YOU! |18

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2017 knows no chill at all. This week we are exploring the idea that maybe Richard Simmons is just not that into us. We are eager to discuss all the Beauty and the Beast drama: Emma Watson’s underboob and Lefou’s new Gay orgy scene. Rupaul's Drag Race is moving. REMY MA went in on Nicki Minaj and Juan is gonna get you together on the whole gag. “Get Out” is for sure the Ben Carson story and Jill Zarin is back.

How did SHE get in here? |17

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WOW. 2017 is so wild. This week Juan and Sloane ask the following questions: Where is Richard Simmons? Why did Adele win everything? What is Caitlyn Jenner thinking? and Who let that woman in your house? They share their new favorite lubric...err, I mean moisturizers. They open the show with their statement about Moonlight’s big win.

Removing America’s Wig, the Lady Gaga Experience |16

Thanks for Glistening!

Hi everybody! WE ARE BACK and so excited to be with you again. This week we are unpacking Lady Gaga’s SUPER BOWL Takeover. We are using the brilliant text penned by @NickRBurroughs to help fully understand her domination. Sloane has a cold and is ready to have this damn baby. Juan too is pregnant, but with feeling. Also Lala Land and the season finale of Mariah’s World...tbh it was terrible.

Mommy Mariah let me at thy breast | 15

Thanks for Glistening!

NEW SOCK...SAME SHOE. Welcome to 2017. “All right, we didn’t have a check for this song, so we’ll just say it went to number one, and that’s what it is. Okay.” We’re talking 2017 and Mariah Carey’s role in the aforementioned year moving forward. Serena Williams is such a goddess and she is engaged. Carrie and Debbie–gone to soon. Kim K is back on insta and that’s a good thing because we have been waiting to exhale. You can’t edit your tweets so be careful my babies.

More Episodes

Stomach bugs and getting thin, Juan might be getting arrested by immigration, Sloane's meeting with Janet Reno, Pittsburg accents, grand dames on instagram, who cares about Carrie Fisher and Harrison Ford?, Marcia Gay Harden is a strapping woman, "I seen her at", "I been knowin her", it's Thanksgiving so Sloane got fired again, Fuck 2016, Kylie Jenner is a prophet, Clowns, Prince and Janet Reno died this year, why does McDonalds never have ice cream?, the revelation voice, Juan's Thanksgiving and Christmas plans, Sloane's mom isn't cooking Thanksgiving dinner and it affected her greatly, Thanksgiving Brunch, Sloane reads the Thanksgiving menu at Rosa Mexicano in New York, Cubana Beauty Queen pregnancy announcement, Hot Chopix, Juan skips the dick to get to Hilliary, Hillary's first appearance after her loss, Sloane thinks HRC is out of fucks to give, Juan thinks Hillary should run for senate again, Sloane can't handle The Real, Ginuwine's dick is at attention and is the pride of America, Sloane gets the urge, getting the "beep-beeps", dick that hurts from the start, the manniquin challenge, at the gym, at dinner, the terrible chicken parm at Macaroni Grill, Shirley Caesar and her Thanksgiving remixes, J-Lo and Marc Anthony kissing to stay relevant, J-Lo and Affleck, Affleck pulls some hot latin women, Sloane wants to kiss Marc Anthony and Juan agrees that he's dripping swagoo, glo body shimmer does not wash off, Sloane got trolled the day before the election, pregnant dancing, Sloane got cut to the core... bus arms, Sloane might have threatened a 16 year old, the internet is the most disrespectful person, Mike Pence is the head of a pimple, old white men with money are the WORST, invading a gay man's hole with hate, vile scary and violent...speaking of which- Charlie Sheen is in the news, Dr. Phil looks full, Shelly Duvall need protection from herself, Juan feels like Richard Simmons should be helping her, Charlie Sheen released a poem, tiger blood transfusions?, stay-cation, no fizzy water for Sloane, Charlie Sheen went off his HIV meds, lightning round: Jennifer Aniston's zingo nips, is The Rock the sexiest man alive?, he's a delicious piece of Samoan man-meat, he's sweet silly and goofy, Kevin Hart almost killed Sloane by kicking everyone out of her gym, Juan gives us his "straight voice", Melania's sleeping crown.

Hot Chopix Recap

HRC: Keep Her
Ginuwine's thick dick: Keep It
Manniquin Challenge: CHOP IT
J-Lo and Marc Anthony kissing: Keep It
Charlie Sheen's Poem: Keep It
Jennifer Aniston's Nipples: Keep Keep Keep

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