Seekin' Deacon

The Rev. Deacon Cuyler O'Connor from St. Bartholomew's Episcopal Church in Pittsboro, NC, continues to seek contemplation and listen to others' stories, exploring how they relate to the spiritual world.

God Gives Us The Best 08/09/2025

God Gives Us The Best Rev. Deacon Pam and I discuss different perspectives on respect and love, and how the traditions, virtues, and values hold true even when different generations question them. She shows that God and Jesus gave us the best, even when we wanted to resist and take negative steps towards it. Deacon Pam shares the realization that all need to face consequences and "own" those in order to grow spiritually. Deacon Pam also shares her gifts in both writing and giving sermons, and now she can look at scripture and bring a dynamic shift and approach to both the reading and how we can look at them in today's modern world. Deacon Pam sends us out into the world to celebrate in the gifts of Christ! I want to thank my sister in Christ for this time, it was a true gift. Thank YOU Rev. Deacon Pay Haynes for all you share with this world! /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/37742910

YOU BE YOU 08/01/2025

YOU BE YOU What does Rev. Deacon Pam Haynes spiritual practices look like? It has evolved, and she has a rule of life. She started with the Daily Office from the Book of Common Prayer and now continues to have daily conversations with God. Her prayer life has expanded into a list around people as well as projects tied to the chuch. Her favorite time is late at night, looking at the moon. Walking in the door to St. Andrew's gives Rev. Pam joy and takes her mind off knee pain and other challenges. She reflects on her first visit to the church, where she listened to a fantastic solo. She responded at the end with a loud Amen, and the priest reassured her, "You be you." She has lived by that motto in her continued discernment to serve. Rev. Pam continues her core minstry around taking people experiencing homelessness to housing. The church started a Daughters of the King chapter, of which she was a part. The church supports twelve non-profit organizations, serving as a central hub for them. Rev. Pam reminds us that, like all deacons, she is the bridge from the church to the world. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/37641530

Sit in the "Uncomfortable" 07/25/2025

Sit in the "Uncomfortable" A gift to start this Deacon series with the Rev. Pam Haynes serving at St. Andrews in Greensboro, NC. Pam grew up in Washington, D.C., and had a community of family and friends who looked after one another. As an only child and quiet, her parents instilled in her the value of education, and she was not always the outspoken individual she is today, but a more introverted soul. She shares a rich story about how death in an individual was a place where a mother who had passed cared for the child in the form of nature. Touching one person is the work of God. Growing up in a church of fire and brimstone in the Baptist faith, as well as in the love of Jesus in the United Methodist faith, she was able to pivot in and out of both and sing in both choirs of each denomination. Rev. Pam grew up in the height of the civil rights and activism era in the epicenter of D.C., and the impactful dynamic of education. The majority of the time, teachers lived in her neighborhood. Jewish vendors also allowed the black community to buy goods during this troubling time. Pam leaves us with the powerful message to continue moving forward with the power of loving Jesus with all our heart and soul. If we can accomplish this, hate can be eradicated. We must sit in the uncomfortable. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/37547220

Holy Choices 07/18/2025

Holy Choices Working with Bishop Shaw and Bishop Allen Gates, it showed him how to give them options and holy choices and invite them to decide navigating. Theological decisions that may not always come to light in the present but come to fruition, such as the Gospel stories from Easter. We don't always know the impact we are having until we are long gone. The story of one person who inspired Billy Graham's revival and how that changed his direction to become a great evangelist. Bp. Sam now considers himself a North Carolinian, his New England self has given way to his experiences here in NC. He trends toward Eastern NC, BBQ, and loves all the excellent food the local parishes offer and those fabulous deviled eggs. The new look of the American pope and the formation of his Holy Order is similar to that of Francis. He is very respectful of the traditions and theology. He seamlessly blends the traditions in a challenging time. We want to thank Bishop Sam for this rich time and the NC Diocese for supporting the Seekin' Deacon. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/37456050

Weaving together God's Stories 07/11/2025

Weaving together God's Stories Exploring the "self" and silence, going back to God's biblical stories, and the call of Samuel and how he learns to listen He drives a lot around the diocese, and the time to turn off the radio and step away from phone calls to take in the scenery of North Carolina and the solitude of God. The impact of COVID was very disruptive. Amid this reality, God did provide some forms of redemptive energy from something awful. Communication and online worship built a bridge, and folks were introduced and joined the community, highlighting the ability to adapt even in such dismal times. We are not alone, even when we feel isolated; the presence of God continues to guide us in our discovery. Creating and weaving the stories together through God's fingerprints on them. He expresses the gifts if the body of the collective community. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/37377120

Baptism 07/04/2025

Baptism I am honored and priveledged to have spent some time with North Carolina Diocese Bishop Sam Rodman. We discuss his memory of being baptized as a child at four years old with his two sisters, being the middle child. This serves not only as vivid memory of the church but the community that was present in Blanford. He shares a recent baptism story and how the child began to cry, but then grabbed the cross, which calmed her down. It is the small things that move us during such a celebration. When Bp. Sam was eight years old he visited his grandparents and they took the Sunday of from Church, he decided and insisted to invite the family to his own service with make shift vestments that resulted in good family humor. Rich experiences came from All Saints, Hadley and the Bible Study at a pizza parlor in town. He has been blessed to learn from or be part of a team that offers Bible studies that nourish him. His mom would share in a moring devtion similar to Forward Movment call Our Daily Bread. Bp. Sam shares his cadence around prayer and other practices. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/37283525

Away from Tension 06/06/2025

Away from Tension The Rev. Liam Barr shares his practices of trying to step away from tension and how it has taken over our world. He makes us ponder how we can step away and empty our mind and soul and center. This will result in a release. He asks: How do we limit our access to social media? We lose ourselves when we fall into a space of reaction—the art of slowing down and processing the evocative things that show up through God. We would like to extend our gratitude to the Rev. Liam Barr for this episode and wish him continued success at the New Hope Project, as well as in his service at Holy Innocents in Henderson, NC. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/36895160

Pura Vida 05/17/2025

Pura Vida Growing up in a programmatic church, Rev. Liam Barr gained a different view of church in Costa Rica. The church has depth and meaning related to "who" as a human he is, and possibly trying to dissolve the limitations we have placed on God. The term Pura Vida was adopted by a famous Costa Rican character in a film, which ultimately means pure living/pure life, and was embraced by the culture. The deep relationships built in Costa Rica translate to the deep spirituality in how to live fully and "in the moment". We must ask ourselves: Are we happy and living a full life with God? How do we live in the fullness of life? Rev. Liam also speaks to his rich service with the Latino community at Holy Innocents, a historically grounded Episcopal Church dating back to 1842, in Henderson, North Carolina. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/36603805

Costa Rica 05/09/2025

Costa Rica We join the Rev. Liam Barr, Curate serving at Holy Innocents in Henderson, North Carolina. Liam shares that the world is a disorienting place as he questions who he is and how he can do the work and serve. He is five months into being an ordained Priest and is loving the job he is doing in both the Latino community and the "Project Hope" initiative through the NC Episcopal Diocese, at the campus of St. Mark's in Raleigh. He explained his journey has been one more of Peter than Paul, and not so direct in growing up in Greenville, South Carolina. He caught the church "bug" at Christ Church in Greenville from the youth group activities and the space that everyone belongs to. Christ church has always been a place that can hold him in whatever is placed before him in life. His home church has held a strong relationship with Costa Rica. He has entrenched himself in this meaningful and fruitful work, and has a special love for the country. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/36506465

Common Ground 04/28/2025

Common Ground Ekklesia Church in Raleigh holds a common ground and welcomes the LGBTQ community, and a love of teaching. A person who was LGBTQ shared with Curtis early on in a moment of humility that they did not want to be a burden to the church. At that moment, he decided the church was "all in" on whatever support they could and did give. Curtis speaks to the rhythm and cadence of spiritual practices and how they change with the season. He points out to his parishioners not to feel obligated to practice them all because we are all wired different. He loves reading liturgies and fishing in nature as spiritual practices that add to his life. He points out we need to be mindful of the nuances of the Bible and be careful that "the Bible says this" so we are free of causing trauma. His Co-Pastor CJ and himself make sure to show that that text has multiple thoughts and we should not be addicted to certainty. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/36338070

Community Integration 04/21/2025

Community Integration Curtis discusses how he and his co-pastor, CJ, approach scripture differently. Curtis looks at it from a more musical and artistic view, while CJ, who played quarterback at UNC, views it in a more didactic manner. He goes on to explain how no single person can give a single voice to the Gospel. The church features guest speakers who represent different viewpoints. This former St. Mark's campus is now part of a new initiative launched by the North Carolina Episcopal Diocese, called the New Hope Collaborative. It represents multiple non-profit organizations. Curtis points out that the history of the Ekklesia of Raleigh began in a high school and remained there for fourteen years. When the opportunity presented itself to worship at this new location, they continued to stay connected to the original community at large. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/36244100

Ekklesia and Music 04/11/2025

Ekklesia and Music Please join Curtis Mulder, co-pastor at the Ekklesia Church of Raleigh. The church recently moved from a growing and beautiful community that used high school space to St. Mark's, a new community that shares space with non-profits and other ambassadors of love. Curtis shares his Canadian roots, his grounding in teaching, loving, and leading music programs and how they marry with scripture He was called to move to Raleigh 15 years ago to pursue his passion for ministry. Curtis brings his Canadian "flair" to preaching, which shows in this interview. He also speaks of reconciliation and being the best version of ourselves. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/36104720

Living on the Porch 03/16/2025

Living on the Porch Journey through this final episode with the Rev. Ginny Wilder as she returns home during Hurricane Hugo and spiritually plays Amazing Grace on the front porch of her home in South Carolina. This is a time of beauty with the community and neighbors coming together to sing and laugh. Meeting singer/songwriter Fran McKendree, provided inspiration and he took her under his wing. This revealed that something was in fact "there" around music and sharing with others, even though she is naturally shy and introverted. Her voice was indeed in music and ministry. The final messages she leaves with us and the world, "no one is illegal, nobody is unloved and no one should ever feel unworthy." Thank you Ginny for making this series memorable. - Cuyler /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/35715970

Soul Searching and the Rhythm of Authenticity 03/09/2025

Soul Searching and the Rhythm of Authenticity Friend, in this episode Rev. Ginny is open about soul searching and "soul caring". She shares her practices around keeping healthy boundaries in place and how to be authentic. She left the summer before her senior year of high school to go to boarding school, this allow her to be in full rythme of who she can be but did not realize it at the time. It was a gift from her parents. She shows the importance of being in the right relationship with her beloveds and the position of the church. She has a very eloquent approach and states "God paints a with a brush of all colors" what it means to welcome all people and this being part of the DNA strands of the Episcopal Church. Away from church was a time for her in the wilderness. She found peace in the mountains and hiking: the taste and rich colors of playing the piano and the thin moments it has offered. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/35599560

Navigating a Calling 03/05/2025

Navigating a Calling In this episode we spend time with the Rev. Ginny Wilder, she is the Priest serving at St. Anne's Episcopal Church in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. She shares her journey growing up in Summerville, South Carolina. She was raised in an Episcopal Church and a loving community. She journeys on and has a vulnerable conversation with her family that she is gay. She is confronted with this in college as well. She is an acclaimed musician and music gives a space that provides another spiritual outlet. Ginny has a gift for preaching and being present with all under an umbrella of love. The beautiful song at the end of this episode is used with Ginny's permission, titled "Slow Me Down Lord" off her album All Clear. Thank you Ginny for sharing your courageous story and we will have two more episodes with Ginny as part of this series. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/35538865

The Anchor 02/24/2025

The Anchor We continue letting go with Fr. Mawethu. We dive deep into his spiritual practices and the anchor of the Episcopal Liturgy as part of his journey. Running is a way to feel euphoric and practice a discipline of self-care—the gift of sharing a Psalm each day with his family and reflecting on it together. St. John's has healed his wounds and offered a very creative space. It is a low church with a friendly and welcoming environment. The joy of the Lord is his strength and what we all share. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/35400515

"Letting Go" 02/17/2025

"Letting Go" In this episode of the Seekin' Deacon with Fr. Mawethu Ncaca from St. John's Episcopal Church in Wake Forest, NC, Mawethu shows his struggles with the Bible and making sense of it all. He also shows how there is so much more once one lets go and gives oneself to Christ. Mawethu also speaks of some of his experiences witnessing Nelson Mandela's patience as he navigated through apartheid in South Africa. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/35308105

Faithful Journey 02/11/2025

Faithful Journey Please join Rev. Mawethu Ncaca, the Associate Priest at St. John's Episcopal Church in Wake Forest, NC, as he shares his rich faith journey. In his contemplative wisdom, Mawethu explores his journey from South Africa to the United States and his immersion into a new and different world. He shows the sometimes unexplainable "feelings" of gratitude and faith. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/35231650

Life is Prayer 09/23/2024

Life is Prayer We explore the landscape and spiritual journey that has both shaped and changed the Rev. Canon Fr. Morales over the years. Silent prayer has been so important in his past practices of a daily three-hour devotion that has taken place for fifteen years. The importance and influence of the Carmelite order, a very human prayer that embraces the contemplative life, our needs to be grounded and to have reasons to pray. Explanation and wisdom around worship and how it needs to move each of us to action. Canon Morales education journey that unfolded spiritually. The powerful statement that "life is prayer." /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/33169587

Exploring a "Vocation" 09/17/2024

Exploring a "Vocation" This episode explores Canon Franklin Morales's journey around vocation and, ultimately, priesthood. The void inside him that something was missing, and his memories of the joys that church offered him in the past. There were signs placed in front of him during the youth phase when he became more involved in teaching Sunday School and serving as an Acolyte. He pondered and desired to get married and have a family, and how that strayed from Catholicism. He encountered a priest that encouraged him to attend retreats designed to help others explore a vocation. He felt the push to keep attending and exploring a calling. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/33091747

Childhood and Venezuela 09/10/2024

Childhood and Venezuela The Rev. Canon Frankin Morales of the NC Episcopal Diocese of Latino Ministry discusses his rich journey of growing up in Venezuela. His Grandpa took him under his wing and introduced him to the robust Catholic Church and the importance of the catechism. He also discusses his relationship with the maternal figure, the Virgin Mary, the never-ending presence of prayer, silence, and obedience, and the repetition of this cadence in daily spiritual life. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/32983522

St. Ambrose the Honey Tongue Preacher, Family, and Love 06/21/2024

St. Ambrose the Honey Tongue Preacher, Family, and Love The Rev. Jemonde Taylor leans into the history of St. Ambrose. The explanation of the honeycomb and its ties to the community environment, St. Ambrose of Milan, the first Dr., and the honey tongue preacher. Fr. Taylor explores the ancient text and how the family continues to provide his grounding for ministry, faith, and mission with the community. Fr. Taylor's spiritual practices reflect the conversation with God and the slow process in time. The proper order of faith is God, yourself, and your family. Fr. Taylor's final message is to embrace love, without it we are nothing. The relational power that Jesus shows us is how to stand up and hold the world up, which are visible signs of God's kingdom. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/31831977

Faith through the Jazz Mass 06/14/2024

Faith through the Jazz Mass The Rev. Jemonde Taylor explains the forward-thinking of St. Ambrsose and the Jazz Mass. He also explores the impact of how music speaks to the people and the basis of beauty in liturgy. The churches DNA is one of embracing black music and how it has reached out effectively to a younger demographic. A beautiful intergenerational service is offered and established through the art of jazz. The original roots of the Jazz Mass go back to the leadership of Rev. Arthur Cochran, rector of St. Ambrose from 1920-1927. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/31749597

Disrupting White Supremacy 06/06/2024

Disrupting White Supremacy Fr. Jemonde Taylor from St. Ambrose Episcopal Church examines the Christian Church and the strain on the church. The taking of non-Christians for enslavement and the millions of Africans forced to be taken from their homes and also from their land. What are we doing to disrupt that? Fr. Taylor shares practices at St. Ambrose and in the community, the dualistic nature of black vs. white in scripture, and how to dispel these myths. The Ethiopian traditions are rich and touch St. Ambrose in an area of contemplation and peace. Attributes: "Singing in heaven by Stefan Kartenberg (c) copyright 2019 Licensed under a Creative Commons Sampling Plus license. Ft: deutscheunschuld Transition by texasradiofish (c) copyright 2022 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. Ft: Javolenus, unreal_dm, copperhead, Vidian, Stefan Kartenberg, Morusque (Nurykabe)" /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/31634112

Creation Care 06/02/2024

Creation Care The Rev. Jemonde Taylor, the Rector at St. Ambrose Episcopal Church, shares his journey in faith and spirituality and his growing up in Louisburg, North Carolina. We explore the land and God’s creation and how this ties into the forward-thinking ecological initiatives in the surrounding community and the parish. /episode/index/show/4476d295-2012-4c5c-9ec1-0e75be1acc34/id/31568027

Seekin' Deacon

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