Beat Motel Zine
Welcome to Beat Motel Zine, the comedy-infused alt-music podcast! Born from a zine from the DIY scene, we blend laughs with punk, metal, and everything offbeat. Discover the weirder side of bands, from unintentionally funny stage antics to musical mishaps. Tune in for a profane, comedic journey through alternative tunes, where every episode is a laugh. Join us as we explore music's funniest fringes with a punk rock spirit! Can the alternative music scene and comedy mix? Of course they can; we'll prove it to you. Warning, episodes contain creative profanities in the vein of The Thick of It.
This week on Beat Motel, Andrew relives his childhood by rolling down Ed Sheeran’s hill into a pile of dog muck, and Dr. Sam reveals he’s spent more time chasing cheese than dignity. Somewhere along the way, they accidentally remember this is supposed to be a music podcast.
The theme? Cats. That’s it. Not subtle. Not deep. Just cats. From SpongeBob’s snail-pet Gary to the purring sleaze of Queen’s “Cool Cat,” we dig into feline-inspired tunes like they’re buried in a litter tray. /episode/index/show/79ad4ef5-01b9-414c-ad55-3885df5be3cc/id/38843225
If you’ve ever wondered what a Finnish man in a bedroom with a broken keyboard sounds like, then you’re weird. But also in the right place. This week, Dr. Sam joins Andrew for a dive headfirst into the murky swamp of obscure music genres, where rules don’t matter and the cats are in charge.
Expect tangents galore: from liturgical black metal to folk electronica via squee (yes, it’s a thing), this episode is a chaotic tour of sounds you probably never asked for. Th
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In this nostalgia-drenched episode of Beat Motel, Andrew Culture and voiceover man extraordinaire Martin Whiskin hurl themselves headfirst into the deep, murky swimming pool of school memories—and promptly slip on a Verucca sock.
Expect less of a structured discussion and more of a chaotic ramble through:
Drinking out of pickle jars, Nutella jars, and possibly things we shouldn’t mention.
Childhood trauma via public service announcements that were m
Ever wondered what it's like to be whipped in the cobblers by a carbon fibre tent pole? No? Well, you’re about to. In this episode, Andrew returns to the studio and brings along Dr. Sam for a high-brow chat about testicular trauma, Trev & Simon, and the absolute best music to make your hips involuntarily wiggle like an over-caffeinated toddler.
The theme this week? Songs to swing your pants to. The result? A genre-skirting playlist filled with funkadelic basslines, ska-pu
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What is it about British summer holidays that brings out the absolute weirdest memories? Andrew Culture is joined by returning co-host and beard-stroking wordsmith Martin Whiskin for a full-tilt, memory-lane-meets-puke-stained-train episode about all things “Summer Holidays.”
We kick off with threats from Grotbags, traumatising pantos, and a deep dive into the bizarre puppetry obsession of '80s kids TV. From Bob Carolgees and Spit the Dog to the musical trauma inflicted by Orville,
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Ever argued over who controls the aux cable on a long drive? In this episode of the Beat Motel Podcast, Andrew and Dr Sam dive into the tunes that keep them sane (or send them spiralling) on epic car journeys.
From Queen's Greatest Hits to post-metal tantrums, and from Pete Seeger’s calm reassurance to jazz-adjacent Icelandic loops, we dissect the soundtracks that power our road trips, intentional or accidental.
Expect ridiculous stories involving bargain-bin CDs, iPad vomit catchers,
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In this special detour from our usual Beat Motel rambling, Andrew and Dr. Sam swap the studio for the chaos of Hellsinki Metal Festival (yes, with two Ls, because one L just isn’t metal enough). We navigate Finnish beer, dodge suspicious wrestling moves, and try to work out why 8% lager is even legal in a place with mosh pits.
Expect unfiltered commentary on bands like Kanonenfieber, Decapitated, and Fear Factory, plus on-the-ground insights into earplug economic
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This episode of the Beat Motel Podcast drops you into the sweaty, glorious middle of a music fundraiser that brought Bury St Edmunds together in the loudest way possible. I hit the Hunter Club and the town’s rehearsal rooms to catch a full day of DIY brilliance, chat with bands and scene-makers, and find out what happens when a town fights for its music spaces.
Whether you're into punk, indie, or just stories of people doing something real, this one’s for you. No fluff, no filler, just the
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Is it possible to judge an album by its cover? Absolutely. Especially when it's got skeleton hands, raging suns, or Geiger’s flesh nightmares on it.
In this episode of the Beat Motel podcast, Andrew and recurring co-host Martin Whiskin dive deep into the album art that shaped our musical tastes, plastered our pencil cases, and possibly got Dead Kennedys sued. From the raw power of Monster Magnet and Kyuss, to the delicate doodles of The Levellers, to Pink Floyd bein
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Episode 140: Great Bands, Awful Names (feat. Dr Sam)
Brace yourselves for a melodic mess as Andrew and the returning legend Dr Sam dive into the world of bands that slap sonically but utterly fumble the name game. From the majestic chaos of Defeated Sanity (yes, really) to the ultra-bland University, it's a wild ride of killer riffs and cringe monikers.
Expect:
Funkadelic basslines from Graham Central Station (who apparently named
John Peel. The man, the myth, the reason you accidentally got into Bulgarian throat singing that one time. This episode of Beat Motel is a loving, ramshackle dive into the chaotic universe of Peel Sessions.
Andrew Culture is joined by Mick Derrick from Prolapse, who proves that the road from crusty-sounding band names to DIY folklore is paved with weirdness, cassette tapes, and gigs no one came to. Expect tales of friendly old men who just happen to be in Mayhem, Welsh insults passed down to daught
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If you’ve never been ready to square up in a Spoons car park over your favourite band, are you even a real music fan? In this unreasonably passionate episode, Andrew is joined by the charmingly volatile Martin Whiskin as they dive fists-first into the bands they’d get into an actual fight over. Expect tales of local legends, rag-tag riffs, posh ska punks, and very specific ball-based analogies.
Featuring bands that should’ve made it, bands that did, and bands no one's heard of (but someho
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Ever looked at a band and thought, "Yeah, I'd ruin that with my presence"? Well, so have we. This week on Beat Motel, Andrew is joined once again by the mighty Oli as they dive headfirst into the chaotic world of bands they wish they'd been in.
From the sleek, suited swagger of Interpol to the beer-soaked riff factories of Gentleman's Pistols, we ramble through a weird and wonderful landscape of musical desires. Expect tales of porn ties, Led Zeppelin’s airborne fir
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In this ear-bleeding episode of Beat Motel, Andrew is joined once again by Dan Callis for a deep dive into the heavy, the noisy, and the downright daft corners of modern metal and punk. If you're here for thoughtful analysis, jog on. This is a celebration of volume, riffs, and the bands that make you question your own taste.
Starting off with tech issues and a healthy dollop of despair at podcasting platforms, our lads quickly launch into a barrage of riffs. Callis brings the chaos with the likes o
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This week on Beat Motel, Andrew is joined by the ever-eloquent Dr. Sam to unpack the joys, horrors, and outright weirdness of musicians who make sweet music and even sweeter love together. Things get rolling with a heated debate about whether soup is a drink, a meal, or just a gateway to genital injury. Seriously.
From Tom Waits’ transformation at the hands of Kathleen Brennan to the relentless Yoko Ono bashing that both Andrew and Sam righteously defend, this episode is a heady blend
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Welcome to the Beat Motel podcast, where this week Andrew is joined by Dr Sam for a deep-dive into one of music’s most controversial themes: why so many fascinating artists are also colossal bellends.
What starts as a light-hearted waffle about lubricated lips and ear balm (yeah, that happened) quickly takes a sharp swerve into the murky territory of artists who challenge our moral compasses. From Marilyn Manson’s whiny victim lyrics to Jerry Lee Lewis
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Who knew an episode about colours could spiral into tales of crusty white-boy dreadlocks, the audio texture of brown, and Robbie bloody Williams dragging Tony Iommi into the Britpop bin fire?
This week, Andrew and Dr Sam dive into the murky, vibrant, and occasionally neon world of music and its connection to colour. We’re not talking about your A-Level synaesthesia essay here. This is a chaotic ramble through records that sound “pink,” bands that are spiritually “brown,” and the kind of d
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What happens when you love music but live with people who have ears? This week, Andrew and Dr. Sam dive headfirst into the steaming skip bin of Forbidden Music—those tracks that are so loathed, so divisive, or just so downright baffling that they’ve been banned in their own homes.
From the glitchy chaos of Venetian Snares to the crime against ears that is Nightwish, no genre is safe. We cover everything from folk revolutionaries to jazz breakdowns that sound like a musical nervous brea
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This week Andrew is joined by the ever-lovely Dr. Sam to discuss albums that feel like coming home. Naturally, they barely stick to the topic. Expect bowel-related rants, coffee-fuelled enema chat, and Dr. Sam outing himself as the world’s most dangerous urinal misuser.
They dive into the albums that comfort them like a warm blanket (or a familiar loo seat), including Ugly Kid Joe, Black Sheep, The Kinks, and the Charlatans, while getting stuck into the finer points of why Weird Al is
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