Berner Phone

The Berner Phone hotline is open! Hannah Berner and her husband, comedian Des Bishop, are listening to callers, dishing out their best advice, and bantering back with hilarious chemistry for their first ever podcast together. Keep an eye out on their Instagram stories for prompts to leave a voice message and be featured on the pod. Whether it’s pet peeves, secrets, life advice, dating dilemmas, or career questions, Hannah and Des are dialed in. Dial in - https://telbee.io/channel/msnxcnbe39nmb9rpvbi_eq/

Berner Phone #79: This Should Be Illegal 02/23/2025

Berner Phone #79: This Should Be Illegal The list of things that should be illegal could go on forever. You might leave this episode annoyed with humanity, but you'll also feel seen. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/35391830

Berner Phone #78: Life Advice From Des 02/16/2025

Berner Phone #78: Life Advice From Des The dialers are putting Des to the test and he's giving advice on life, love, travel, and becoming a yoga instructor. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/35298465

Berner Phone #77: What We Google 02/10/2025

Berner Phone #77: What We Google Search history is personal, but the dialers are letting us in on their most recent Google searches. You can usually find Hannah searching tennis players, celebrities, and the latest documentaries, while Des is on WebMD and looking up ACL exercises. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/35216485

Berner Phone #76: Karma You Deserve 02/03/2025

Berner Phone #76: Karma You Deserve Hannah's mom joins the episode to explain why we have to protect our energy and let karma do its job. The dialers share stories of when karma came back to bite. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/35126835

Berner Phone #75: Craziest Things You Did For Money 01/25/2025

Berner Phone #75: Craziest Things You Did For Money Will people really do anything for money? We're finding out this week as the dialers share the wildest things they've done for money. Get Huel today with this exclusive offer for New Customers of 15% OFF + a FREE Gift at /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/35007575

Berner Phone #74: Trying New Things In Bed 01/19/2025

Berner Phone #74: Trying New Things In Bed Every now and then, we realize it's time for a spicy episode. The dialers are sharing the good, the bad, and the ugly of new things they've tried in bed. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34908300

Berner Phone #73: How Did I Not Know This? 01/11/2025

Berner Phone #73: How Did I Not Know This? We are learning, growing, and realizing things today because we asked the dialers to tell us "I was today years old when...". Some of these facts might change your life, but don't count on it. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34819910

Berner Phone #72: Worst Coworkers 01/05/2025

Berner Phone #72: Worst Coworkers The holiday season has come to an end and it's time to go back the office. Everyone has a coworker (or two) that they can't stand, so the dialers are sharing their worst work stories. Get Huel today with this exclusive offer for New Customers of 15% OFF + a FREE Gift at /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34722665

Berner Phone #71: Life's Quandaries Part 2 12/28/2024

Berner Phone #71: Life's Quandaries Part 2 Turns out the dialers need a lot of advice...so we're doing a part 2 of our unprofessional advice. This week we're dealing with finances, family, and failing relationships. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34638155

Berner Phone #70: Life’s Quandaries 12/22/2024

Berner Phone #70: Life’s Quandaries It's the holiday season and the dialers were in need of some advice, so we delivered. Lines are being blurred in open relationships, some in-laws just won't take the hint, and our resident cat expert is sharing some knowledge. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34574060

Berner Phone #69: Are you the only one? 12/16/2024

Berner Phone #69: Are you the only one? Everyone has their quirks and odd habits. And this week, the dialers are revealing theirs in hopes that they aren't the one one. You'll either finish this episode feeling understood or questioning why you are the why you are. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34462610

Berner Phone #68: Vacation Disasters 12/08/2024

Berner Phone #68: Vacation Disasters A vacation can either be a bonding experience or the beginning of the end of a relationship. This week the dialers are sharing their worst vacation experiences with family, friends, and partners. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34330900

Berner Phone #67: Are You The Asshole? 12/02/2024

Berner Phone #67: Are You The Asshole? Family and friendship dynamics are complicated, but someone is always the asshole. Based on the popular Reddit thread "Am I the asshole?", we're deciding if the dialers are in the wrong this week. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34245675

Berner Phone #66: Family Fights 11/24/2024

Berner Phone #66: Family Fights 'Tis the season for the biggest family fights of the year. Hopefully these stories of Thanksgiving conversation gone wrong will make you feel better about your family's holiday dysfunction. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/34122296

Berner Phone #65: Bad Gifts 11/17/2024

Berner Phone #65: Bad Gifts Sometimes it really is better to give than recieve. This week the dialers are sharing the worst gifts they've ever gotten. /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33960297

Berner Phone #64: Answering Questions About Men 11/07/2024

Berner Phone #64: Answering Questions About Men Des is in the hot seat this week. He's answering all the things you've ever wondered about men. This is the most dialers we've ever had call in and you don't want to miss this one. with code BERN for 10% off with code 25BERN for 25% off 50% off at with code BERNER for 20% off /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33837832

Berner Phone #63: Halloween Faux Pas 11/01/2024

Berner Phone #63: Halloween Faux Pas We address the pros and cons of Halloween and people's most embarassing costumes. 20% off dog food at Free shipping at free shipping for $25 off menswear /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33745972

Berner Phone #62: Stuff That's Overrated 10/25/2024

Berner Phone #62: Stuff That's Overrated Hannah's back (again). We're coming for everything from running to bad sex positions and the dialers are sharing hot takes on the most overrated things in life. 10% off cookware at 20% off bras and shapewear at 200% off exercise machines with code BERN 25% off Daily Synbiotic at with code 25BERN 30 day free trial at /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33614272

Berner Phone #61: Childhood Nostalgia 10/17/2024

Berner Phone #61: Childhood Nostalgia Hannah is back on pod this week and we're feeling nostalgic. Is there really such a thing as a the good ole days? Those who got to go to Blockbuster on Friday nights and burn CDs for their high school girlfriend would say yes. 10% off skin and body care at with code BERN 40% off at 15% off all products at with code BERN 20% off and a free cat toy at /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33498767

Berner Phone #60: Best Life Advice 10/10/2024

Berner Phone #60: Best Life Advice Des is joined by the hilarious Joanne McNally this week. They're giving advice on dating a comedian, in-law issues, how to woo an Irish man, and correct emoji usage. Free shipping at 25% off Daily Synbiotic at with code 25BERN Save $15 on skincare at $200 off your order at with code BERN /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33411982

Berner Phone #59: The Craziest Lies 10/01/2024

Berner Phone #59: The Craziest Lies The dialers have been through the wringer with some crazy liars. We start off light hearted then hear some insane (and possibly illegal) stories. We don't condone lying BUT white lies about why you were late or why you canceled plans are completely ok. 15% off at with code BERN 30 days free at 20% off bedding at 40% off at 40% off 50% off at with code bern50 20% off CleanMyMac X with code bernerphone 40% off dog food at /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33274387

Berner Phone #58: Best Gripes 09/17/2024

Berner Phone #58: Best Gripes Gripes come in many forms and, in our book, they are all completely valid. The dialers are sharing the things that grind their gears and Hannah gives some advice to the big booty girlies. 20% off shapewear at for free shipping and returns 15% off all products at with code BERN 20% off at with code BERN 20% off at with code BERN /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33099457

Berner Phone #57: Bad Roommates 09/12/2024

Berner Phone #57: Bad Roommates Bad roommates are a canon event, but they always make for a good story. The dialers are sharing some horror stories and we start to realize we might have been the bad roommates. for free shipping 10$ off at with code BERN 25% off at with code 25BERN $5 with code BERN when you download the Ibotta app /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/33024167

Berner Phone #56: Spicy Advice Part 2 09/04/2024

Berner Phone #56: Spicy Advice Part 2 There were some wild and juicy messages this week. We're giving more advice about relationships, trying stand up, and ruining wedding days. Get cookware for 10% off at 40% off dog food at Get up to 43% off and a free gift at 30 day free trial at 15% off sheets at /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/32901547

Berner Phone #55: Spicy Advice 08/28/2024

Berner Phone #55: Spicy Advice We're back this week with another advice episode. The dialers have found themselves in some sticky situations and we're giving our unprofessional advice. $200 off exercise machines at with code BERN 50% off at with code BERN50 Get a new wireless plan at Affordable luxury essentials at free shipping 25% off daily synbiotic at with code 25BERN 25% off shaving needs at /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/32779322

Berner Phone #54: Dumbest Purchases 08/19/2024

Berner Phone #54: Dumbest Purchases We've all fallen victim to buying items from targeted ads that seem like the cure to all our problems. This week the dialers are sharing the purchases they regret and have hidden from their spouses. And it's one of our favorite episodes so far. 20% off the best chips at with code BERN Smell good with 15% off at with code BERN 15% off at with code BERNER 40% off at 20% off bras and shapewear at 50% off haircare /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/32644362

Berner Phone #53: The Best Excuses 08/14/2024

Berner Phone #53: The Best Excuses What if we all stopped trying to make excuses and just said no? The moral of today's episode is "if it's not a fuck yes it's a no". Get 25% Daily Synbiotic at with code 25BERN 20% off better hydration at with code BERN 15% off bedding at 25% off shaving needs at with code BERNER 10% modern bidets at with code BERN /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/32572927

Berner Phone #52: Pets Gone Wild 08/05/2024

Berner Phone #52: Pets Gone Wild Pets are the glue that hold our lives and our mental sanity together. But they have minds of their own and despite what we may think, they don't always listen to us. This week the dialers are sharing some wild pet stories. Some left us laughing and some left us cringing. 10% off skin and body care at with code BERN $5 for registering on the Ibotta app with code BERN Get the best cat litter 20% off plus a free cat toy at with code BERN Snack guilt free at with code BERN for 20% off Get 20% off your CleanMyMac X subscription with code BERNERPHONE /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/32441292

Berner Phone #51: Minor Disasters 07/29/2024

Berner Phone #51: Minor Disasters The dialers are sharing the minor things that feel like a complete disaster. From incorrect food orders to stubbing your toe - days are being ruined nationwide. Luxury essentials at for free shipping and returns Cut down on your wireless bill at Get ready to eat meals with 50% off at with code bern50 10% premium cookware at Get premium hydration for 20% at with code BERN First skincare visit for $5 at with code phone /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/32338877

Berner Phone #50: Solving Your Dial-emmas 07/23/2024

Berner Phone #50: Solving Your Dial-emmas We're back with another unprofessional advice epsiode. Becasue it's so much more fun to help other people with their problems than trying to solve your own. The dialers are navigating wedding stress, awkward family situations, and dating dilemmas. Get the best chips for 20% off at with code BERN 20% off shapewear at for expert mental health help Get 25% off Daily Synbiotic at with code 25BERN $5 off your skincare consultation at 15% off with code BERN at Upgrade your athletic wear at with code BERN for 25% off /episode/index/show/7d7d109d-429a-4282-90dc-f891239bf801/id/32259607

Berner Phone

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