BBXX: Let's Get Intimate!

A podcast challenging the way our culture conditions us to talk about sex, intimacy, and healthy relationships. Join us for provocative and entertaining conversations with experts- and leave with insight that will transform you and your relationships.

Pleasure and Presence 06/14/2023

Pleasure and Presence is a sex-positive therapist whose clinical focus is to help people heal from trauma, establish healthy boundaries, build effective communication strategies, improve relationships, and enhance their sex lives. Her work places extra emphasis on the connection between thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations in order to help people create transformation in their lives and relationships through the mind-body connection. Guided by the synthesis of multiple theoretical approaches—including psychodynamic, affect regulation, interpersonal neurobiological, attachment focused, cognitive behavioral, somatic and systemic principles—she incorporates evidenced-based research into her counseling services. Dr. Kate Balestrieri is also the Founder of the platform , which provides an inclusive space for people to get access to education about important but stigmatized topics that people live with every day, related to trauma, relationships, sexual health, and sexual sexual problems. In our conversation, we explore different definitions of pleasure, joy, and contentment—and the importance of challenging our default definitions of everyday terms. We discuss the relationship between sexual pleasure and non-sexual pleasure, how pleasure is something we are innately capable of yet culturally conditioned away from, the role of shame and self-sabotage, and how we can cultivate a pleasure practice to reclaim pleasure in our lives. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/27146118

How to ask for what you want and get the life you deserve 06/06/2023

How to ask for what you want and get the life you deserve Dr. Jeremy Goldberg is a PhD scholar who spent the past five years studying the science of human behavior, specifically how attitudes affect action and how we can communicate to inspire greater and lasting change. He is a TEDx speaker, coach, founder of Love Distance Love Bombs and host of The Long Distance Love Bombs Podcast. We talk about how to stop being afraid of standing up for yourself or having hard conversations, learn how to ask for what you want and express your needs with confidence, step into your power and care less about what other people think, and how to understand and unpack the stories we tell ourselves in order to get the life we want as a result. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/27060234

Non-Monogamy? It’s more common than you think 05/30/2023

Non-Monogamy? It’s more common than you think Dr. Amy Moors research focuses on issues related to gender, sexuality, diversity, and well-being. For example, examining diverse expressions of sexuality, including how stigma affects well-being among sexual minorities and people engaged in consensually non-monogamous relationships. Her research has been featured in TIME, Scientific American, and The Atlantic. In addition to serving on the faculty at Chapman University, Dr. Moors is a Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and the co-chair of the American Psychological Association’s Division 44 Consensual Non-Monogamy Task Force. We discuss the meaning of consensual non-monogamy (CNM), important terms and terminology, misconceptions about CNM relationships, how CNM and monogamous relationships are similar vs. different, what we can learn from types of relationships different from our own, and some of the surprising findings from her research. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/26988645

Your relationship with yourself is the portal to everything you want 05/16/2023

Your relationship with yourself is the portal to everything you want Sasza was recently interviewed by Stella Stephanopoulos as a guest on the . We received so much positive feedback from it that we decided to reshare it here on the BBXX podcast! Stella interviews Sasza about building a deeper understanding of ourselves and how the relationship with ourselves is the pathway towards creating deeper, more intimate, relationships with others. They explore why many people tend to find romantic partners when they least expect it, what it means to date intentionally, the role of patience and timing, and how Sasza manifested her partner through a love letter. They also discuss self care as a form of self respect and how we all embody yin and yang energy in different ways. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/26852988

Success Without Sacrifice 04/28/2023

Success Without Sacrifice We talk about the mind-body connection, high performance habits, breaking down old beliefs, how to move from a state of mental stress to mental strength, and how to work towards the ultimate goal of success without sacrifice. We also share tips for how to design a “sensory diet” in order to escape from the overstimulation that plagues our modern day-to-day lives. Dr. Blossom is a doctor of occupational therapy and high performance coach. She works with high-achievers and high-achieving organizations and leverages the latest science and research related to the body-mind connection in order to demonstrate how the power of your brain paired with high performance habits can radically reshape the direction of your life and work. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/26681313

Awareness → Exploration → Liberation 04/14/2023

Awareness → Exploration → Liberation We talk about the mind-body connection, how to influence our bodies through our mind—and inversely—how to influence our mind through our body. We explore what sex represents, the meanings we attach to it, and some common anxieties and fears underlying it. We discuss shame, the purpose it serves, where it originates from, and ways to liberate ourselves from shame through awareness and exploration of ourselves and our relationship to sex & sexuality. Arlyn Owens is a psychosexual therapist, educator, and registered nurse. Arlyn provides counseling and therapy around the topics of sexuality, intimacy, and relationships. His areas of expertise include communication, shame and identity, kink, and consensual non-monogamy. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/26541267

Game Changers in a Relationship: Your Partner Doesn’t Need You 04/03/2023

Game Changers in a Relationship: Your Partner Doesn’t Need You A few months ago, I made up this thought exercise, and I couldn’t get it out of my head. I kept coming back to it, kept feeling relief from it, and kept getting positive feedback from people I had shared it with. It might be a tough pill to swallow, but it’s actually liberating, and it forces a perspective shift that can be game-changing in your relationship. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/26377953

Game Changers in a Relationship: Risk vs. Responsibility 03/27/2023

Game Changers in a Relationship: Risk vs. Responsibility This is the story that challenged me in a big way—and a really great way. I’ve never thought of blame, accountability, or responsibility the same ever since, and it’s been game-changing in my relationships. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/26352744

Live by Design, Not by Default 03/10/2023

Live by Design, Not by Default Have you ever felt frustrated with where you are in life? How did you get to where you are now? Did you choose the life you’re currently living or did it sort of happen by default? Have you consciously, intentionally designed the life you are living, or do you feel like things are happening to you and out of your control? These are some of the thought-provoking questions we reflect on as we explore how to live a life by design rather than by default! We talk about how to recognize when you’re not living a life true to yourself, how to understand what your core values are, and how to live in deeper alignment with those values. We share advice for ditching the default life, redefining success and failure, creating goals, building consistent habits, and incorporating more fun and play into your daily life. Kate House believes that “if nothing changes, nothing changes” and seven years ago she decided to change everything. She realized by not changing her circumstances she was actually choosing to stay in them. She left her job to pursue a new path that was better for her health, her family, and her happiness. She is now a certified health coach and host of the “Live By Design” podcast. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/26186670

Everyday Endorphins: Habits For Happiness 03/02/2023

Everyday Endorphins: Habits For Happiness Want to experience more positive feelings, a stronger sense of life satisfaction, and less negative emotions in your life? Join us for a conversation to uncover the key ingredients that will maximize your happiness and well-being. Stella Stephanopoulos is the host of the Everyday Endorphins podcast, which hosts conversations on the nuances of mental health and wellness with the goal of inspiring others to feel empowered to take control of their own wellbeing by focusing on what brings them joy and happiness. Stella has a degree in Philosophy-Neuroscience-Psychology and is a contributing writer for Thrive Global. We talk about eudaimonic vs. hedonic well-being, positive psychology, type 1 vs. type 2 fun, comparison as the thief of joy, the role of guilt, pride, and shame in hustle culture, how to evaluate your own happiness and wellbeing, and the best habits to help increase your sense of happiness and well-being. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/26104512

Hot Tip: Try “Spoiling Sessions” 02/16/2023

Hot Tip: Try “Spoiling Sessions” This is Part Three in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Robertson and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship. We talk about how to consciously create spaces for connection to thrive in your relationship, incorporating more fun and play into your relationship routine, and keeping the spark burning. We talk about how to establish agreements and boundaries that protect your partnership, tips and tricks for weekday or weekend connection rituals, and how to give or receive the gift of “spoiling sessions.” If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, or our previous episodes in this series, then be sure to check them out! /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/25954716

Ask, Don’t Assume 02/07/2023

Ask, Don’t Assume This is Part Two in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Robertson and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship. We might think we know everything about our partner, but that’s not actually possible. We’re constantly learning and growing as individuals, and our relationships should also be evolving along with us. Approaching our relationship from a place of curiosity helps us create shared understanding in our relationships, which is one of the most important antidotes to conflict. We talk about how to get through tough times in a relationship, how to react when you are in the midst of a conflict, proactively preventing conflict through shared understanding, and how to know when it’s worth it to keep investing in your relationship vs. call it quits. If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, be sure to check them out! /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/25858974

Desires, Fears, and Boundaries in Relationships 01/27/2023

Desires, Fears, and Boundaries in Relationships This is Part One in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Roberton and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship. We talk about the importance of shared understanding, defining agreements in your relationship, and strategies for repairing conflict. We explore desires, fears, and boundaries as a powerful tool for communication, as well as other tips, tricks, and strategies to include in your Couples Toolkit. Most importantly, we explore how to know when a relationship is worth fighting for—and how to recognize if it’s time to walk away. If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, be sure to check them out! /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/25745985

Humans of Intimacy: The Hard & Ugly Part of The Journey 12/21/2022

Humans of Intimacy: The Hard & Ugly Part of The Journey What’s one thing that you want to unlearn? Sometimes, it’s less about what we need to *learn* and more about what we need to *unlearn* in order to be able to live the life and the relationships that we truly desire. We talk about the biggest lessons learned from dating, challenges in the relationship with ourselves, the process of unlearning, normalizing the hard and ugly part of the journey, and advice for what to do when it feels like you’re deep in the mud of your own personal development. We explore how to tap into the most authentic version of yourself, how to show up the way you actually want to in relationships, and what it feels like to live in relationships that are aligned with your values.Michael Fenchel is the co-founder of Breathe For Change, the largest yoga teacher training in the United States. He has co-founded and grown four companies including , a movement dedicated to empowering entrepreneurial leaders to create more belonging and flow in their lives, relationships, and teams. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/25396308

Humans of Intimacy: Your Inner Wisdom Already Knows 12/14/2022

Humans of Intimacy: Your Inner Wisdom Already Knows How many of us have accepted ourselves fully, for everything that we are? Most of us still have a long way to go and many parts of ourselves still yet to be acknowledged let alone accepted. has become a master in helping people reclaim the many different pieces of themselves—the good, the bad and the ugly—in order to find wholeness. We talk about how relationships serve as mirrors to see ourselves in a different way and how we can learn, grow, and heal with another person. We learn how to tap into our intuition, discover our inner wisdom, and create an internal compass in order to better guide ourselves, our decisions, and our relationships. Adriana has been a Harvard leadership trainer, international development leader, and a coach & facilitator for over 10 years. She is now the co-founder of , a movement dedicated to empowering entrepreneurial leaders to create more belonging and flow in their lives, relationships, and teams. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/25324653

Food For Thought: An Easy Trick To Feel Better Immediately 12/06/2022

Food For Thought: An Easy Trick To Feel Better Immediately This piece of advice will change the way you think every day. It will help you cultivate more empathy for others and more appreciation for yourself in everything you do. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/25148376

Food For Thought: How To Make The Right Decision Every Time 11/29/2022

Food For Thought: How To Make The Right Decision Every Time Have you ever felt stuck in "analysis paralysis"? It's time to think differently about how we make decisions. Here's an easy trick so that you can make the right decision—every time. This perspective shift changed my life. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/25148337

Food For Thought: Jealousy vs. Envy 08/31/2022

Food For Thought: Jealousy vs. Envy Without realizing it, most of us don’t use these words correctly. While envy tends to seem like just a stronger version of jealousy, the psychology and meaning behind it are of important difference. We love to examine the way that subtle linguistic differences can shape the way we communicate and connect with one another :) /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23877774

Food For Thought: Thankful vs. Grateful 08/29/2022

Food For Thought: Thankful vs. Grateful Do you know the difference between giving thanks and expressing gratitude? While similar in some ways, the use cases for each are different and, as always, we love to examine the way that subtle linguistic differences can shape the way we communicate and connect with one another :) /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23877747

Casual Conversations: The Paradox of Perfection 08/24/2022

Casual Conversations: The Paradox of Perfection Vitale Buford is an executive coach, international speaker, and author of the book, "Addicted to Perfect," in which she explores her 10-year struggle with Adderall and perfectionism. If you hear the word "perfectionism" and you don't think it's relevant to you, please have a listen anyway. This episode is going to surprise you. We talk with Vitale about the deeper issues that perfectionism stems from as we learn about its relationship to self-worth, personal criticism, codependency, abandonment, and its role as a coping mechanism. We also discuss the danger of living a life focused on trying to please others and the consequences of living your life without really knowing who you /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23885370

Food For Thought: Contradiction vs Complementation 08/22/2022

Food For Thought: Contradiction vs Complementation Studies of highly creative people and highly successful people, such as the one by the psychologist bestselling author Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, have shown that a dynamic set of seemingly opposing characteristics is a very important part of what makes them tick. “Contradiction” or perceived cognitive dissonance is hard for our brains to process, so we often categorize the world and people into boxes, think even of our of ourselves as being either at one or the other end or the other of the spectrum for many personality traits. The world isn’t so simple and neither are we. The good news is that our “contradictions” can actually be quite complementary, not only to each other but to our success in life. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23860443

Casual Conversations: Sexual Liberation for Deeper Connection 08/17/2022

Casual Conversations: Sexual Liberation for Deeper Connection We continue the endlessly glorious conversation about sexually connetion as a path to deeper understanding ouselves, the ability to explore more dynamic versions of ourselves, and more connection in our lives - inside and outside the bedroom. Tune in to learn why you deserve great sex, what the key ingredients are, and how it can positively transform countless other areas of your life! Join us as we continue to change the culture & the conversation surrounding intimacy and relationships! /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23860428

En Español: Definición del Amor 08/15/2022

En Español: Definición del Amor ¿Cuál es tu definición del amor? Hablamos sobre esta pregunta y más con Lorena Bassani. Lorena es una periodista, entrenadora de conciencias, y pionera blogger. En adición de amor, hablamos sobre definiciones alternas del final feliz, tomar el control de nuestras vidas, como controlar nuestras emociones, y sus cursos. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23860398

Food For Thought: Curiosity vs. Criticism 08/10/2022

Food For Thought: Curiosity vs. Criticism Whether it’s meeting a new person or talking to someone in our family, there is a point at which (even well-intentioned) questions can come across as uninvited criticisms. How do we walk that fine line while trying to learn about someone else or draw it ourselves when someone else has stepped over our own boundaries? /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23860293

Episode 64: All Day I Dream About Sex: Threesomes, Middle-Aged Sex, and Fantasies 08/08/2022

Episode 64: All Day I Dream About Sex: Threesomes, Middle-Aged Sex, and Fantasies Wife wants a threesome? Listen to this episode! This week, we’re joined by Dr. Justin Lehmiller, who has our dream job: sex researcher. He joins us to talk about his latest book, Tell Me What You Want, where he surveyed thousands of Americans about their most explicit fantasies. We talk about how sex changes over the lifetime (hint: middle aged sex rocks!), the most common male and female fantasy, how to talk about your sexual fantasies with your partner, and what your fantasies may mean. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23845592

Episode 63: The Untold Story of Adversity and Resilience 08/05/2022

Episode 63: The Untold Story of Adversity and Resilience Meg Jay, PhD is a Clinical Psychologist and an Associate Professor of Human Development at the University of Virginia. Her books have been translated into more than a dozen languages and her work has appeared in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review and on NPR and BBC. "Resilience" is of the defining attributes in facing adversity, but resilience isn't just "bouncing back" from a difficult challenge. In fact, resilience might be a lot different than you think—and you might be a lot more resilient than you give yourself credit for. In today's interview with Meg Jay, we talk about why you can't outrun your past, we normalize growing up with adversities, and give advice for how to recognize and reflect on them. We also talk about the importance of life's defining journeys and stages, why history doesn't have to repeat itself, how love heals us, and other healthy coping mechanisms. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23967867

Casual Conversations: Sexuality and Creativity 08/03/2022

Casual Conversations: Sexuality and Creativity Hani Lees Dresner is the Founder of the sex-positive ceramics company, Gashtrays. Hani emphasizes celebration vs exploitation of the naked body in her work and she believes that sex-positivity and body-positivity are crucial steps towards battling sexual and mental health. She sees her work as a “subtle protest” that aims to provoke conversation in a way that is approachable. We talk about the story behind the Gashtrays movement, her nude-positive family, the hilarity of the human body, and the relationship between sexuality and creativity. She also talks about us her beautiful handmade vulva and penis artwork and we announce our upcoming virtual workshop on May 1st where you will all have the opportunity to make your very own art to celebrate your body! /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23845571

Episode 62: Shameless - A Sexual Reformation 07/25/2022

Episode 62: Shameless - A Sexual Reformation Nadia Boltz-Weber is a New York Times Best-Selling author of the book “Shameless: A Sexual Reformation," an ordained Luther Pastor, and the founder of House For All Sinners & Saints. In our conversation, we dispel the shame that so frequently underlies our beliefs about sex and sexuality. Nadia brings a clever—and extremely comical—point of view to the topic of sex and religion. She argues that sex, sexuality, and pleasure aren't the opposite of religion and what the church stands for. In fact, she argues that, if you look closer, in reality they stand for and value a lot of the same things. Nadia wants you to love sex and feel no absolutely no shame about it. She wants you to know that whether or not you believe in God—and especially if you do—you're supposed to celebrate it and feel REALLY F*CKING GOOD. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23318117

Humans of Intimacy: Keep It Simple 07/20/2022

Humans of Intimacy: Keep It Simple BBXX Founder, Sasza Lohrey, interviews her sister-in-law for a follow-up of our last of Humans of Intimacy, "Teamwork Makes The Dream Work," to get the other side of the story. We talk about her life story, what shaped her view of relationships growing up, common misconceptions of relationships, foundational qualities of a relationship, lessons in communication, the role of luck, how to stay positive in difficult moments, and lessons learning in parenting. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23303849

Episode 61: The Power of Expressing Apology 07/18/2022

Episode 61: The Power of Expressing Apology We discuss the five languages of apology, their relationship to the five love languages, tips for a healthy relationship, expressing apology, as well as the power of apology in conflict resolution. Dr. Jennifer Thomas is a bestselling author, TEDx speaker, leadership consultant, and psychologist who helps people know what to say in any situation, including one of the most complicated situations of them all: when giving an apology. She has co-authored the book, “When Sorry Isn’t Enough” with Gary Chapman, author of the bestselling book and the world-famous concept of the “5 Love Languages” in which they present relationship-changing research for understanding love, the power of language, forgiveness, the impact of a good apology, and the art of giving an apology in the right “language” in order to be recognized by the person on the receiving end. /episode/index/show/bbxxletsgetintimate/id/23303792

BBXX: Let's Get Intimate!

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