Calm & Confident with Trina Gray
On the brand new “Calm & Confident” podcast, Trina teaches simple, actionable ways to move through life and work with greater ease and more joy. It is a must-listen for women seeking a better way to succeed in all areas of life — career, income, relationships and health. With Trina’s stories, lessons and guest speakers, you’ll arm yourself with tools to live happier and healthier at home and in your career as you create your next, best chapter. It’s a casual vibe with lessons that you can implement into your life to think and act better. You’ll feel like you’re in a coffee shop with a trusted mentor having a personal conversation.
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18. How to Thrive (Not Just Survive) Any Holiday
07/04/2025
18. How to Thrive (Not Just Survive) Any Holiday
In this episode, I open up about the real-life challenges and opportunities that holidays bring. I remind myself—and you—that it’s completely okay if our holidays don’t look like they used to, or like anyone else’s. The goal isn’t just to get through the season but to actually enjoy it. I share four practical tips that help me stay grounded, honor my personal values, and design holiday traditions that bring peace and joy, not pressure and comparison. Whether your family structure has changed or you’re simply craving a different rhythm this year, this episode is your permission slip to redefine what holidays look like—for you. “Be willing to keep the good and carry it over and let go of maybe what doesn't serve you anymore, or what just doesn't fit your current family situation anymore, things can look different from before and still be right now. The other side of that equation is things can look different from others and still be right.” -Trina Gray Keypoints: I embrace that holidays can look different now and still feel right. I set personal standards to stay true to what matters to me. I focus on whose opinions truly matter in my life. I design holidays around what brings me joy and meaning. I let go of traditions that no longer serve me. Connect with Trina: | |
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17. Bucket List and Big Dreams
07/01/2025
17. Bucket List and Big Dreams
In this episode, you’ll learn how to create a powerful, 4-part vision board that brings together meaningful quotes, joyful bucket list items, bold goals, and your biggest dreams. If the first half of your year felt like a blur or didn’t quite go the way you hoped, you’re not alone — and it’s not too late to reset. Today, you’ll get clear on where you're going in the second half of the year. We’re creating a vision board with a twist — not just images cut from magazines or quotes to hang on a wall, but rather a living, breathing document to excite you, goals that guide you, and big dreams that stretch you. I dedicated this episode to my mom, who turns 84 in heaven as I’m recording today. She was a big fan of vision boards and always loved seeing mine and writing her own. Even in her late 70s, while battling cancer, she was setting goals just like the ones we will do together today. My mom and I had a complicated ending and lost years between us at the end, but this is one area where we felt connected and understood — setting goals for our lives and living intentionally. “If your goals are about revenue in your business or clients or sales or growth or certifications you need, or benchmarks you need to hit, by all means, those can be your goals, and that's where you are in life. You just own that, and you get goals down that are really specific to what's kind of fueling your life right now.” - Trina Gray Key Points: I walk you through creating a 4-part vision board: Words to Live By, Bucket List Items, Life Goals, and Bigger Dreams. I share how my mom inspired my love for vision boards and how we found connection even through a complicated relationship. I encourage you to include experiences that spark joy—like solo trips, yoga classes, or live concerts—on your bucket list. I outline how to set goals in different areas of your life that match your current season—career, personal growth, wellness, and more. I remind you to dream bigger—whether it’s launching a podcast, buying a dream home, or creating financial freedom. Resources: Connect with Trina: | |
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16. Embracing the Messy Middle
06/27/2025
16. Embracing the Messy Middle
In this episode, I dive into the concept of “the messy middle” — the often uncomfortable stage after something changes in life. Inspired by Robin Sharma’s quote, “Change is hard at first, messy in the middle, and gorgeous at the end,” I talk about how this messy space shows up in all areas of life — from your work to relationships to health. I may have a scratchy voice (thanks to a cold!), but I’m here, showing up consistently, because I value our time together. I offer practical tips on how to navigate the messy middle — from building routines that anchor you, to visualizing the beautiful end that keeps you moving forward. My hope is to help you fill your calm and confident toolbox, so you’re better equipped for any transition life throws your way. “Look for what is constant, to create sameness, to embrace routine when life feels messy, to tidy up the parts of your day that you can so the messy parts don't make you so undone.” - Trina Key Points: The messy middle is a universal part of change—messy, emotional, and necessary for growth. Establishing a routine creates familiarity and stability when life feels chaotic. Envisioning a beautiful ending keeps us hopeful and motivated during tough transitions. These tools apply across all life areas—work, health, relationships, and personal development. The goal is to help you build a calm and confident toolbox to thrive through change. Connect with Trina: | |
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15. Life By Design
06/20/2025
15. Life By Design
In this episode, I reflect on what it really means to live a life by design—not by default. I walk you through an honest self-assessment exercise where I encourage you to rate key areas of your life on a scale of 1 to 5 stars: inner health, physical health, family, career, finances, social circle, and adventure. I share my own scores and the stories behind them to help you see how small, intentional steps can spark powerful change. Together, we explore how mindset, self-worth, and inner peace can shape your confidence and direction. My hope is that this episode empowers you to become more self-aware and to take actionable steps toward building a life you truly love. “Do you feel you have a positive mindset, or are you pulled toward the negative, toward the down? Do you have a sense of self love, compassion and worth, or are you right now kind of living as your own worst critic? Do you feel this kind of foundation of inner peace in your life now, even if life is busy or chaotic, you can have this kind of glow or sense of inner peace. Do you feel that right now, or are your insides more frenetic or shaky or anxious?” - Trina Key Points: Rate your life in 7 key areas to gain clarity and create a roadmap for growth. Focus on inner health—mindset, self-love, and peace—as the foundation of a fulfilling life. Physical wellness, family connections, and meaningful work are essential pillars to evaluate. Your social circle and sense of adventure directly influence your happiness and energy. Use your ratings not to judge, but to reflect, celebrate wins, and take positive action. Connect with Trina: | |
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14. Don't Break Promises to Yourself
06/17/2025
14. Don't Break Promises to Yourself
In this episode, I open up about a topic that has deeply shaped my personal growth—keeping promises to myself. I talk about how easy it is to let ourselves down, and how each broken promise chips away at our self-confidence. But the good news is: the opposite is also true. When we keep even the smallest commitments, we begin to rebuild trust and belief in ourselves. I share real-life examples from health, finances, relationships, and daily routines, all designed to help you start small and stay consistent. If you're ready to take back your power and create lasting change, this episode is for you. "When you start honoring your own word, everything in your life begins to align with your self-worth." - Trina Key Takeaways: Breaking promises to yourself can silently erode your self-trust and confidence.] Small, consistent actions—like a daily walk or sticking to your budget—build integrity. Keeping promises in areas like health, finances, and relationships impacts your overall well-being. Daily habits and routines are powerful tools for long-term transformation. Start small, be intentional, and watch how your life begins to shift in meaningful ways. Connect with Trina: | |
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13. The 2 "C" Formula to Business Success
06/13/2025
13. The 2 "C" Formula to Business Success
In this episode, I dive deep into a formula that has shaped my 20+ years of entrepreneurship: Consistency + Creativity = Success. I share how this simple yet powerful equation can be applied across different business models—from fitness and corporate wellness to direct sales and masterminds. Whether you're running a coffee shop, selling products, or leading a service-based brand, having a consistent offer while layering in creative, seasonal, or thematic updates is key to keeping customers engaged and loyal. I also talk about how personal growth lays the foundation for implementing business strategies effectively, and how sticking to a yearly plan—with room for innovation—can build trust, visibility, and long-term success. “People don’t come back to chaos—they come back to clarity. Be consistently creative, not constantly chaotic.” – Trina Gray Key Takeaways Consistency builds trust—people crave predictability in products and services. Creativity keeps your audience engaged—themes and seasonal offers prevent stagnation. Stick to a yearly core offer and build your marketing and content around it. Use relatable analogies like coffee shops and restaurants to understand how to apply the formula. Self-improvement is the prerequisite—the best strategies won’t work without strong decision-making and personal growth. Connect with Trina: | |
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12. Create Solutions, Not Stories
06/10/2025
12. Create Solutions, Not Stories
In this episode, I share a pivotal lesson that will save you time and worry in your personal and work life. We all have runaway thoughts in our heads. We read into situations, we overthink conversations, we play back events in our head over and over. When we are unsure, we often fill in the gaps ourselves — creating stories that are not rooted in reality. We assume the worst, and that never ends well. I share with you how to recognize when this is happening and what steps you can take to resolve it. Take control back of your thoughts. To find peace of mind, you can let the runaway thought go or address it in a way that does not put the other person on the defensive. Learn to create more solutions and fewer stories. "If you're going to make up a story, at least make it a good one — or better yet, don't make one at all. Just ask." – Trina Gray Keypoints: Your Thoughts Aren’t Always Truths – When someone doesn’t reply, it’s easy to spiral. I remind you that delay doesn’t equal disinterest — it usually means distraction. Catch the Spiral Early – Learn to spot when your thoughts are running away from you. You have the power to pause, reassess, and redirect. Clarity vs. Closure – Ask yourself: do I need peace or answers? That choice determines whether you let go or ask a kind, open-ended question. Give People Grace – Life happens. Most of the time, a late reply isn’t personal — it’s about timing, not intention. Communicate Like a Grown-Up – Using mature, thoughtful language opens doors. Disarming questions lead to understanding, not conflict. Connect with Trina: | |
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11. Heart & Armor
06/06/2025
11. Heart & Armor
In this episode, I dive deep into a powerful leadership lesson that I created for an MBA class 15 years ago, called Heart and Armor. This is the foundation of leading others. The emotions of leadership are often harder than the work. I explain what it means to lead with both care and protection. I share how building three businesses and mentoring teams taught me to lead with integrity, even when others burn bridges. Leading with heart also requires armor to handle the emotional weight of leadership. Whether you’re managing a team, building a business, or simply showing up for others, this episode will help you feel seen, understood and empowered. "Lead with love, but guard your soul—because your heart is your superpower, and your armor is your protection." - Trina Key Takeaways: I learned that “heart and armor” is about leading with deep care for others while protecting my energy and well-being. Trina’s journey showed me that success in leadership often comes from serving others, not just managing them. I was reminded that not all relationships last forever, and that’s okay—I can give fully without expecting loyalty in return. I realized how crucial it is to handle criticism (especially online) with heart, not ego, even when it stings. This episode taught me that to lead well, I need to be both a poet and a warrior—creative, empathetic, and resilient. Connect with Trina: | |
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10. Standards For Yourself
06/03/2025
10. Standards For Yourself
In this episode, I dive into the importance of setting standards for yourself, rather than having expectations for others. I share a personal story about a conversation with high performance expert Brendon Burchard at a Mastermind event in Napa Valley. I’ve turned one thought he shared into a lesson for our Calm & Confident toolbox. We often attach unnecessary and unrealistic expectations for others in our lives — from family to friends to coworkers. When we shift our focus to having standards for our own lives — from health to faith to ambition to growth — we work on our own journey, rather than control others. “The standards I set for myself matter more than the expectations I have of others.” - Trina Gray Key Takeaways: I learned that setting standards for myself frees me from the trap of comparing and competing. Trina’s emotional story about her son reminded me that pride and sadness can exist side by side—and both are valid. Letting go of rigid expectations of others allows more peace and better relationships in every area of my life. I’m reminded that I should thrive where I am planted by owning my current circumstances and showing up fully. Trina’s mantra of calm, confidence, clear communication, and gratitude gave me a framework for how I want to show up daily. Resources: - A life-changing tool millions of people can’t stop talking about. The Let Them Theory is a step-by-step guide on how to stop letting other people's opinions, drama, and judgment impact your life. Two simple words, Let Them, will set you free from the exhausting cycle of trying to manage everything and everyone around you. It’s time to build a life where you come first—your dreams, your goals, your happiness. - Your new daily practice for personal growth! Join 300,000 achievers from around the world who use GrowthDay to stay motivated, confident, and productive as they become their best selves. Connect & Reflect: If this episode resonated with you, take a moment to reflect on your own standards—what do they look like? How are they helping (or hurting) your growth? | |
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9. Pick A Lane
05/30/2025
9. Pick A Lane
In this episode, I share a simple analogy from sport to life. "Pick A Lane" is all about making a choice and moving forward with confidence—whether in fitness, nutrition, business, or life. I draw from my own experiences as a swimmer, a health club owner, and a mom to illustrate how choosing one path and staying focused can lead to success. We explore how overwhelm, overthinking, and perfectionism hold us back—and how clarity and commitment can change everything. “You don’t need a perfect plan. You need a decision. Pick your lane, and then give yourself the power to finish your own race.” — Trina Gray Key Points: Stay in your lane: Just like in swimming or track, every lane leads to the same finish line—what matters is committing to your own path without comparing or constantly switching. Overcome decision paralysis: Progress doesn't require perfection. The three biggest blockers—overwhelm, overthinking, and perfectionism—are just distractions. Multiple paths to success: There isn’t only one “right” way to approach health, business, parenting, or personal growth. Pick what works for you and go all in. Personal stories inspire action: I share how committing to a unique health club model 20 years ago paid off, and how my daughter’s focus on one social media platform brought quick results. Small changes count: Whether it’s adding more water to your day or choosing a fitness routine that fits your lifestyle, staying consistent with your lane is what brings long-term success. Connect with Trina: | |
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8. Thrive Where You Are Planted
05/27/2025
8. Thrive Where You Are Planted
In this episode of Calm and Confident, I open up about the power of giving your best in every season of life—whether you're in a dream job, a transition, or a dusty town hall teaching fitness. I share my journey from journalism school to entrepreneurship, and how “thriving where I was planted” led me to unexpected opportunities, from writing for major newspapers to opening my own award-winning health club. This episode is a reminder that greatness begins by showing up hard, right where you are. Each effort, no matter how small, can plant the seeds for something bigger. "You never know who’s watching when you show up hard—it might just be the person who opens your next door." - Trina Gray Key Takeaways: I thrive by showing up hard, even in small rooms – Whether I was speaking at a junior high or teaching in a rec center, I gave it my all. That effort always led to something more. I believe every stage of life matters – From student to entrepreneur, I’ve seen firsthand how giving my best—even when the audience was small—created ripple effects. I used the Ms. Pac-Man mindset – Like the game, when I moved forward with excellence, new doors and levels unlocked. I built community by being present – In a new town with no connections, I created a following by pouring heart and hustle into every fitness class I taught. I’ve learned the magic of saying yes – A simple banquet speech turned into a national speaking gig years later. Showing up opened doors I didn’t even know existed. Connect with Trina: | |
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7. Where People Fit In Your Life
05/23/2025
7. Where People Fit In Your Life
In this episode, I open up about a powerful realization I had back in 2019 after discovering a book that reshaped the way I view relationships and influence. I dive into the importance of being intentional about who has a place, voice, and vote in your life. This framework has helped me live with more calm and confidence, and I believe it can do the same for you. Through personal stories and visual tools, I share how defining these circles of influence can empower you to protect your energy, elevate your decision-making, and live with greater clarity. "The quality of your life depends on the quality of voices you allow in."- Trina Gray Key Takeaways: • I learned that not everyone deserves a say in my life—only those I trust deeply get a voice or a vote. • I introduced a visual model with three circles: place (outer), voice (middle), and vote (inner). • The people in my outer circle may be there by choice or circumstance, but their input is limited. • My inner circle is reserved for those whose opinions truly shape my life—my partner, kids, and closest friends. • I encourage you to reflect on your own circles and communicate boundaries that protect your peace. Connect with Trina: | |
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6. Save Your Battery
05/20/2025
6. Save Your Battery
In this episode, I dive deep into the concept of "saving your battery" by becoming more decisive and freeing up your mental space. As a busy entrepreneur and mother, I know firsthand how draining indecision can be. I walk you through three major barriers to decision-making—overwhelm, overthinking, and perfectionism—and share practical tools to help you break free from them. My goal is to help you lead a calmer, more confident life by teaching you how to make decisions that lighten your load and sharpen your focus. "You don’t need more time—you need fewer decisions." - Trina Gray Key Points: I identified overwhelm as a key barrier and explained how reducing commitments and clarifying life roles can lead to better decisions. I explored how overthinking holds us back and suggested that making informed, swift decisions can help us build self-trust. I tackled perfectionism, sharing how striving for perfection often delays progress and how I overcame it by launching this very podcast. I reminded listeners that not all tasks are created equal—it's important to spot urgent but unimportant activities that drain your energy. I encouraged you to choose progress over perfection and focus on growth and service, even when you don’t have all the answers. Connect with Trina: | |
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5. When Things Go Wrong
05/16/2025
5. When Things Go Wrong
In this episode, I dive into the inevitable moments when life simply doesn't go as planned. Whether it's missing a hotel booking, dealing with unexpected work mishaps, or just backing into a garage door, I talk about the power of giving ourselves grace during these times. I share a practical three-step framework to help you respond intentionally: take care of yourself first, thoughtfully handle the situation, and then move forward. I also answer a thoughtful listener question about balancing life roles and how having too many—or too few—can impact our fulfillment. Life’s messes are universal, but how we handle them determines our growth, our peace, and ultimately, our joy. "When you hold on to the thing that went wrong, your arms get heavy." – Trina Gray Key Takeaways: Give yourself permission to feel emotions and process mistakes with healthy outlets like walking or journaling. Life will throw curveballs—what matters is how we choose to respond. Use my three-step framework: care for yourself, respond to the issue, and then release it. Letting go of anger and resentment is a gift you give to yourself and those around you. Take a closer look at your roles in life—too many may stretch you thin, too few may leave you unfulfilled. Connect with Trina: | |
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4. Things Look Different
05/13/2025
4. Things Look Different
In this episode, I open up about how life, relationships, careers, and even holidays can evolve—and still be completely right for where we are now. I share personal stories, including how I’ve handled grief during Mother’s Day, navigated changes in my direct sales career, and adjusted my health routines as I’ve grown older. These experiences have taught me that just because something looks different, doesn’t mean it’s wrong. In fact, embracing change has helped me feel more grounded and confident. My hope is that you’ll use this podcast as a toolbox—filled with practical lessons and real-life insights—to guide you through your own transitions and help you live a calm, intentional life. "Things can look different and still be right." – Trina Gray Key Points: Life changes—big or small—can still align with who I am today. “Right” for me now doesn’t mean perfect; it just means what fits in this season. Holidays have changed after personal loss, but they still hold space for gratitude. I’ve accepted that relationships evolve, and that’s part of growing with grace. My approach to health and self-care now looks different, and that’s perfectly okay. Connect with Trina: | |
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3. Your Roles in Life
05/06/2025
3. Your Roles in Life
In this episode of the Calm and Confident Podcast, I share a game-changing lesson I learned back in 2013 that completely reshaped how I approach productivity and well-being: the power of managing life through roles. I open up about how I used to juggle over a dozen roles—mom, wife, business owner, coach, friend, and more—and how it led me straight to burnout. After attending a Franklin Covey workshop, I discovered that simplifying my life into just five or six meaningful roles, including one dedicated solely to self-care, brought me more success and peace than I ever imagined. I walk you through how to identify, prioritize, and define success in your current roles—so you can lead a more intentional, energized life. Key Topics: Recognizing when you’re juggling too many life roles and how to trim them down Why self-care should be a non-negotiable, primary role in your life Understanding that roles are flexible and can shift over time Balancing your roles by defining both feelings and metrics of success Practical strategies to reassess and realign your roles for long-term well-being Connect with Trina: | |
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2. Own Your Time
05/06/2025
2. Own Your Time
In this episode of the Calm and Confident Podcast, I dive into one of the most life-changing tools I’ve used to manage my time and energy: the Eisenhower Matrix. I walk you through how to distinguish between what’s truly important versus what just feels urgent—and why that difference matters if you want to live with more calm and confidence. I share personal stories (yes, even the one about running out of gas!) and offer practical, real-life tips to help you become more proactive instead of reactive. My goal is to help you reclaim your time and prioritize the things that actually move your life forward. Let's evaluate where your time is going and make intentional changes together. Key Topics: Understanding the four quadrants of the Eisenhower Matrix Recognizing and limiting “unimportant and not urgent” time-wasters Setting boundaries on tasks that feel urgent but aren't important Preventing last-minute chaos by being proactive with important tasks Prioritizing meaningful relationships and long-term well-being Connect with Trina: | |
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1. Set Things Down
05/06/2025
1. Set Things Down
In the very first episode of the Calm and Confident Podcast, I (Trina Gray) share my personal journey from journalist to fitness instructor to entrepreneur, and I open up about the powerful lesson of setting things down—learning to walk away from things that no longer bring joy, whether that's a career role, a friendship, or a side hustle. I talk about building three successful businesses, balancing professional ambition with family life, and how I’ve learned to make room for growth by letting go. I also introduce the idea of offering less explanation when making bold decisions, encouraging you to trust yourself and speak with clarity and confidence. This episode sets the tone for what’s to come: real, supportive conversations to help you live with more calm and confidence in every area of your life. "You have permission to set things down. You're allowed to say, it's been great. I valued it while I did it. In fact, I loved it while I did it. I'm just not carrying it forward." - Trina Key Topics: Setting things down without guilt or resentment Offering less explanation and speaking with clarity Trusting yourself through life’s transitions Balancing ambition with personal peace Creating space for new opportunities through intentional choices Connect with Trina: | |
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