Dystopian Telephone Podcast
The year is 2020 and the world is on fire, but existence is beautiful. Amidst tragedy, heartbreak, and relentless change, two artists strive to find inspiration through deep chats with fellow creatives about what it means to be alive, right now. And so, Dystopian Telephone--an existential comedy podcast for the New Renaissance--was born! With each new episode, host Alanna and tech wizard Dayjan reach into the void of our present surreality to discuss life, love, politics, and everything in between. (Music by Benjamin Coles, Games by Kristen Johanna)
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National Child Care with Sam and Emily
04/21/2021
National Child Care with Sam and Emily
There have been so many changes to realty over the past year. Through the turbulence, politicians and policy makers have struggled to keep up with the needs of the people (and saving face when they won’t). As the Global Pasta Primavera rages on in Ontario, it continues to shine a light on broken areas of society that have been overshadowed for years...one of which being a need for a National Child Care Plan. But what does that mean? What would a plan like this look like, cost, or achieve? Who would benefit, and why on earth has it been tabled for 50 YEARS by the federal government? ECE students Emily and Sam join the team this week to tackle all of this and more, with a fair amount of political roasting along the way. An open letter by the Association of Early Childhood Educators Ontario (AECEO) and Ontario Coalition for Better Child Care (addressed to the Minister of Education, Stephen Lecce, Premier, Doug Ford, and the local MPP for whomever signs the letter): https://www.childcareontario.org/protect_respect_ecec#newmode-embed-10670-30076 (Visit www.native-land.ca to learn about unceded land and why it matters)
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Frontline Health Care with Kate and Johanna
04/11/2021
Frontline Health Care with Kate and Johanna
CW: In this episode, we discuss the effects the COVID-19 pandemic has had on mental health, particularly in long term care, and health care in general. If you have been struggling with your mental health due to the pandemic, or you or somebody you love works or lives in long-term care, consider the context in which you listen to this episode, if at all. Take care of you, stay safe, and be gentle with yourself always. When we gathered around the Zoom screen to record this episode, cases were at an all time high and the Ontario government was opening patios and indoor dining... and here we are now, only a couple of short weeks later, in Lockdown 3.0, with cases somehow even higher...so, while the clown show running our province fumbles around, let's take a moment to pull focus back to the true epicentre: health care. On this very special episode, Kate, Johanna, and Kristen join the Dystopian Team for a deep and earnest discussion about what it’s like to be a frontline health care worker right now, beyond the one-dimensional "Hero" narrative. While the topic is a heavy one, this conversation with Johanna, Kate, and Kristen felt like a grounding breath of fresh air. Join us as we discuss everything from early confusion, inconsistent policies, and emotional burnout to vaccine rollout, and moving forward into a post-COVID world. (Visit to learn more about unceded land and why it matters)
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Socialism with Nick and Anthony
03/29/2021
Socialism with Nick and Anthony
In a Global Panorama with plenty of time and tragedy to think, many of us have taken the opportunity to question the collapsing structures and "isms" around us, leading to a very polarizing "ism": socialism! This week, the Dystopian Team joins Nick (@nickhamz) and Anthony (@icedcanadianoblanco) as they talk about what the heck IS socialism (and why it's not communism), the deep flaws within capitalism...and what you can do about it! From the crown to collectivism, propaganda to poverty, this episode might just have you seeing Red. Visit www.native-land.ca to learn more about unceded land and why it matters.
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Adapting Theatre for the Pandemic with Shannon and MJ
03/11/2021
Adapting Theatre for the Pandemic with Shannon and MJ
Let’s set the scene: it’s February 2020. Alanna and Dayjan are casting a musical, and Shannon (@Shannonisnthome) and MJ (@melodramadrag) are launching Start the Riot Theatre (@starttheriottheatre), a company unlike any other...and March happens: a Global Pepperoni brings the theatre industry to a grinding halt. As time went on, two weeks turned into two months, Zoom calls replaced in person meetings, and time itself lost all meaning...somehow leading us back to March 2021. So, in a world brought to its knees by COVID, what has become of theatre? In this episode we talk about adaptation, perseverance, passion, and creating opportunities. We reminisce about the good old days of quick changes and curtain calls, and ponder over the future of theatre and the arts through a refocused lens. If you are an artist looking to showcase your work, check out @starttheriottheatre on Instagram, or email (Visit to learn more about unceded land and why it matters)
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Makeup Art with Drake and Laura
02/24/2021
Makeup Art with Drake and Laura
Don’t let the title dissuade you: despite what patriarchal marketing tactics may have told you, there’s something in this episode for everyone! And, on the same note, aesthetic beauty, while fun to play with, holds no weight in a human’s inherent value...This week, Laura (@lala_roach6 on Instagram) and Drake (@elegxnza on Instagram) join the Dystopian Team to talk about makeup as an art form in their own lives, and how the beauty industry can honestly do better. From day-to-day to cosplay, sensational theatre to grotesque horror, we dive into this complex world with an artistic appreciation and critical lens. We talk celebrity brands, industry elitism, and loving who you are, with or without foundation and fake lashes. (Visit www.native-land.ca to learn more about unceded land and why it matters)
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ADHD in Adulthood with Riley and Carley
02/11/2021
ADHD in Adulthood with Riley and Carley
It’s not just for hyperactive little boys with bad grades anymore, folks! That’s right, we’re talking about ADHD, and—more specifically—the fact that so many intelligent, capable, and creative individuals aren't diagnosed until adulthood. What is UP with that?! To bring this topic to life, we are joined by mental health advocate, knower of science, and TikTok creator Carley (@ADHaDult on TikTok and Instagram) as well as educator, drama practitioner, and all-around ray of sunshine, Riley (@ryesenberg on Twitter). From procrastination to impostor syndrome, and ultimately self love and acceptance, this episode is brimming with educational and relatable content! (Visit www.native-land.ca to learn more about unceded land and why it matters)
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Media Literacy with Ryan and Carolina
02/03/2021
Media Literacy with Ryan and Carolina
Just when we thought that 2020 was the wildest year we would ever experience, a mob of white supremacists and conspiracy theorists storm Capitol Hill, kicking off what turned out the be the longest January on record. In light of—well, all of it—we thought it was about time we discussed a skill set that is crucial, yet sorely lacking in our society: media literacy. With the help of Ryan and Carolina, the Dystopian Team discuss social media, implicit biases, the polarization of mainstream media, nationalist propaganda, and more to try and determine where society went wrong, and how we can do better. (Visit to learn more about unceded land and why it matters.)
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Sex Work with Jesse Joules and Miss January
01/27/2021
Sex Work with Jesse Joules and Miss January
Although this is certainly more explicit than previous episodes, was it ever worth while! This week, the Dystopian Team is joined by two very special guests who have made a living in one of the oldest, yet most taboo industries in human history. Professional dominatrix Miss January and ex-burlesque performer Jesse Joules open up about how they got started and why they value what they do! Whether you’re already an advocate for sex workers and want to learn more, considered trying your hand on platforms like OnlyFans, or skeptical of the profession, we hope you'll give it a listen! (Visit to learn more about unceded land and why it matters.)
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Caring for Living Things with Robert and Morgan
01/20/2021
Caring for Living Things with Robert and Morgan
This is it! The wholesome content we all need during these trying times... it’s pets, plants, and their people! Fair warning: if you’ve been pondering the addition of some foliage or a furry companion to your life, this episode may just push you over the edge. This week on Dystopian Telephone, we are joined by two humans with an affinity for living things to discuss why we so often bring these creatures and photosynthesizes into our lives. With wit and charm, Robert (@tielord on twitch), Morgan (@pixelthegreyt on Instagram) and the team discuss motivations, best practices, and common faux pas when it comes to parenting non-humans of all kinds, and how, if you’re so inclined, they can improve your quality of life. Morgan: @pixelthegreyt AND Robert: twitch.com/tielord AND (Visit to learn more about unceded land and why it matters.)
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Being Transgender with Lacey and Sam
01/13/2021
Being Transgender with Lacey and Sam
Hooray! Another queer episode! This week, the Dystopian Team was honoured to sit down with Lacey (artemiscreates.com, @artemis_creates on Instagram and Twitter; @artemiscreates on TikTok and Patreon) and Sam to discuss the T in LGBTQIA2+. From growing up and coming out, to the fortunes and frustrations of being transgender in 2021, this week’s discussion sheds light on what it’s like to be transgender. Through their stories, Lacey and Sam pose critical questions, address representation, and express the joys of finally feeling at home in their own skin! (Visit to learn more about unceded land and why it matters.) Search "My Name is Sam and I'm Transgender" on YouTube to discover more about Sam's transition from the beginning. Windsor-Essex Trans Support Centre: Higher Limits Cannabis Company:
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Healing through Music with Mandolynne and Droo
01/04/2021
Healing through Music with Mandolynne and Droo
It goes without saying that the events of 2020 have been traumatizing for everyone, so it is only fitting that this week’s discussion centres around a universal way of coping: music! Endearingly edgy, immeasurably fierce singer-songwriters Mandolynne (Mandolynne on Spotify and @mandolynnemusic on Instagram and TikTok) and Droo (@hiimdroo on Instagram) call in to talk about their relationship with music and how it has helped them cope. From touching childhood anecdotes to thoughtful recommendations for your playlist, these two up and coming Toronto artists will leave you feeling inspired.
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Bisexuality with Ben and Alex
12/21/2020
Bisexuality with Ben and Alex
Despite the lag in proper media representation , It is undeniably a pretty good time in history to be queer, especially in Canada. However, something we don’t see often enough are coming of age stories for the Bs in the LGBTQ2IA+ community. In the most personal episode yet, Alanna, Alex (@storytimegirlpoetry on Instagram) and Ben (the man behind our Dystopian Tunes) help bridge that gap by sharing their stories of growing up and navigating the world as bisexual humans. From first kisses to identity crises, stereotypes to sexual fantasies, this episode is packed with love, laughter and—of course—a healthy dose of chaos. In addition to the immaculate vibes he creates for this podcast, Ben recently co-created the soundtrack for Bar Seekers, a "Best of" winner in Toronto's 48 Hour Film Project.
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Ethical Non-Monogamy with Emily and Marisa
12/14/2020
Ethical Non-Monogamy with Emily and Marisa
This week, the Dystopian team are joined by Em (@emilykrolofficial on Instagram) and Marisa (marisafeels.com) to crack open a divisive topic at any dinner party: Ethical Non-Monogamy. From coping with jealousy to navigating life events, this episode--through the eyes of three poly-ladies at different places in their journeys--explores the ways in which we give and receive love. The frameworks within which we exist are as rigid or as malleable as we decide to make them...as long as we communicate openly and set boundaries! Love can be messy but, in the end, we are all just space junk and stardust.
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The DRED Experience with Erin and Haley (Part 2)
12/08/2020
The DRED Experience with Erin and Haley (Part 2)
As a wise professor once said, “Where’s the drama?” This week, Haley (@haleymctag on tiktok) and Erin are back in action for an existentially chaotic Second Act exploring Drama in Education and Community. From a nostalgic commentary on the realities of student life to a thoughtful discussion about the ways we show up as our authentic selves, this episode beautifully rounds out the DRED experience for three over-achieving drama nerds.
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The DRED Experience with Erin and Haley (Part 1)
11/30/2020
The DRED Experience with Erin and Haley (Part 1)
How does one go about getting a degree in “the art of being human?” For host Alanna, and guests Erin and Haley (@haleymctag on TikTok), the answer is to study Drama in Education and Community (DRED). In this First Act of a two-part episode, these outgoing theatre nerds reflect back on their time in an enigmatic yet enlightening program, consider some of the darkest and most uncertain sides to our current reality, and discuss how they can use the skills they learned--back then--to attend to humanity--now. More information about the Anti-Racism course mentioned in this episode (titled "The Crash Course") can be found at: https://www.accordingtoweeze.com/
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Teaching Abroad with Kristen and Christian
11/23/2020
Teaching Abroad with Kristen and Christian
In a pre-covid world, what is the most exciting thing you could do with a liberal arts degree? Why, teach abroad of course! This week, Alanna and Dayjan are joined by Christian and none other than Dystopian Telephone’s iconic Game Master, Kristen, to discuss their experiences teaching abroad! From newness to nostalgia, this episode is insightful, delightful, and even a touch poetic. If this year has left you brimming with wanderlust, this episode is for you! Stay up to date with our Dystopian goings on by following @dystopiantelephone on Instagram. (Music by Benjamin Coles)
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American Politics with Patrick and Krystle
11/16/2020
American Politics with Patrick and Krystle
In the era of fake news, fragile democracy, and late stage capitalism, how are queer, anxiety ridden, highly educated Canadians coping with their tumultuous neighbours to the south? This week, the Dystopian Telephone team is joined by political science MA graduate, Krystle and student, Patrick to discuss the impending, historic 2020 Election, among other trending topics. Filled with laughter, banter, and critical thought, this politically charged episode is one for the history books! (note: this episode was recorded before November 3rd, 2020) Hear more from Krystle on Big Bitch Energy (@bigbitchpod) wherever podcasts are found! Stay up to date with our Dystopian goings on by following @dystopiantelephone on Instagram. *an issue in the master recording, particularly in the last third, may be audible
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The Pilot
11/09/2020
The Pilot
Who are we and why are we here? In the premier of their first foray into the world of podcasting, Alanna and Dayjan (with special guest Kristen) try their darnedest to summarize the forces that brought them together and the mission behind Dystopian Telephone. From gender-related wildfires to the difference between gay and millennial culture, The Pilot presents a delicious preview of the existential dissonance that is to come.
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