Gotta Love Family Podcast

Learn how to connect everyday in everyday ways.

Recharging – Do You Know What Works for You 04/07/2024

Recharging – Do You Know What Works for You There are many ways to recharge and care for yourself but they aren't helpful unless you know what works for you. and did you know that what works can change and then you have to go back to the drawing board. Join me as I share an experience from 2011 and another from 2024 that is illuminating when it comes to understanding what works for you when you need to recharge. I will also share why I don't buy the idea that to recharge we have to go outside of the chaos of daily living. If that is the case, then many of us will get very little self-care. It doesn’t matter how you recharge. When you know what works, do it daily and the heat of the day will be less intense. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/30706628

SPARKS = Loving to Learn 03/24/2024

SPARKS = Loving to Learn In the last two weeks, I’ve given you some information on Sparks and how to use them to connect with your children. In the article on March 10 – , I mentioned that when we learn to utilize Sparks, we can help our children love the idea of learning. Kids have a lot to learn, and often, whether we homeschool or use public or private schools, the love of learning can get buried. We can’t prevent times when school is boring or too hard. But we can keep the desire to learn alive, as we utilize our children's Sparks. When I was speaking and teaching, I spent many hours helping parents use their children’s Sparks. I wrote LOTS of articles on the experiences actual families had. Today’s article was written in 2012, the same year I had and many . My friend, Leah, was taking her family to Florida and wanted them to LOVE the trip and to LEARN a lot. We both knew what I wrote in the article two weeks ago - Life is about learning, and the best-lived lives happen when we continue to learn. Leah wanted this for her boys. Join me as I share how Leah got her boys on board and how she took a Spark and turned it into a roaring fire. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/30489918

SPARKS - The BIG Win 03/17/2024

SPARKS - The BIG Win Last week I shared information about Sparks and how valuable they can be in building child-parent relationships. I also shared my big failure when it came to one of my grandsons Sparks. Let’s have a quick review. In my book I wrote that the value of seeing your child’s Sparks is that it’s a wonderful way to get Present with your child. It’s powerful not only in helping them love learning but also in creating tighter relationships. So, what is a Spark? Simply put, a Spark is anything that a child says or does that lets you know they’re interested in something right now. Last week I shared a big Spark fail. Today I want to share a Big Spark win. When you understand Sparks and how to use them you will listen, enjoy, and bond better with your children. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/30402843

SPARKS - The Big Fail! 03/10/2024

SPARKS - The Big Fail! In my book I wrote that the value of seeing your child’s Sparks is that it’s a wonderful way to get Present with your child. It’s powerful not only in helping them love learning but also in creating tighter relationships. Over the next few months, I want to share some examples of how I, and other parents, were able to use Sparks to connect with our kids. They are fun ideas that you can incorporate with your children, even if they haven’t shown up as a Spark, because you can also ignite Sparks. Light a spark and watch it burn! Besides, it’s nice to have a quiver of ideas in your back pocket, especially with summer right around the corner and the sometimes boring days it brings. Learning slows down and tech takes over. It is useful to have some fun ideas and then gather your kids around for some non-tech enjoyment. One of the reasons I’m going to tackle this issue of Sparks in the next couple of months is because I’m going to be spending LOTS of time caring for my grands. I fly to Seattle for a week, mid-month, where my grands range in age from almost twelve to four. Then it’s on to Colorado for a week. These grands range in age from married with kids, down to age four. I need a reminder, because as I see Sparks, I can respond, and our time together will be more powerful. The article I am sharing this week was written in late 2011 and is about an epic failure in the Sparks arena. It illustrates the number one thing to remember about Sparks – the younger the child the shorter the Sparks shelf life. So when a Spark pops up you need to be prepared to respond. When you do, the results are amazing. Next week I will share a success. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/30304753

Are You Afraid of Reading Hard Books? 03/03/2024

Are You Afraid of Reading Hard Books? Have you ever wondered how to read books that aren’t easy reads? This has been an issue for me. I LOVE reading but sometimes the classics are a challenge. History can be dry. Some books deal with tough topics. How do you manage those? I just finished a book while at my daughter's in Seattle, The Midnight Library. It’s a book I would recommend to others, but it wasn’t what I would call a ‘tough read.’ It was a thoughtful and enjoyable read. We all need those now and then but to learn and grow we occasionally need the tough read. In May of 2023, I finished the book, Confucius - The Analects. Here is what I posted: “OK, this book was a tough read for me! I know exactly why I am not a philosophy major. I do not think deeply enough or abstractly enough. I had friends who read this and told me it was a must-read. So, I read it. Yes, the whole thing, but I confess, I didn’t get most of it. Join me as we discuss how to read hard books. When you can tackle hard books, then you can help your children and youth do the same. It is a skill worth learning and then passing on. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/30203293

Do You Have a 'Family Thing'? 02/25/2024

Do You Have a 'Family Thing'? Every mother struggles to bring all that she has to the family table. We all want to teach our children to be kind, to have manners, to be honest, to do their chores, to share, and on and on. We also want to teach skills that can help them as adults. We desire to encourage them to develop talents for the joy of it. It can feel daunting. But there is something else that many of us struggle with; we want to have meaningful ‘family learning’, where our families connect and where the connection we create is passed down. That can often seem even more challenging because of the time and effort it can take. This is not something that we can give to our children by our example or our way of being. I am talking about what we do as a family that is uniquely our own, that is passed on because we did them together and they became part of us. Today we are going to tackle this sticky wicket and see how it can be done, even if you have felt that you are failing at this or if you don’t even get what I’m talking about. : ) /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/30092638

Harness the Power of focus! 02/11/2024

Harness the Power of focus! I have a friend that I admire very much, Alysia Humphries. What got me thinking about her this last couple of weeks was that tonight (Saturday) I am going to a special event for caregivers. She and a handful of other women are giving some nurturing to caregivers. I fit into that group and so Alysia asked me to come. I am going to have some foot zoning done and Alysia is giving me some light therapy. Restful! That got me thinking about Alysia and a letter she sent to me after an event I participated in over a dozen years ago to help to mothers focus better on what matters. Today Alysia kids are twelve years older, but being a present parent doesn’t change even when your kids are adults. I thought you would enjoy her letter and the tips that she came up with for herself to manage better. Enjoy Alysia’s experience and I will enjoy my light therapy. : ) /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29886138

HELP! I Need Activities for Small Children 02/04/2024

HELP! I Need Activities for Small Children I recall getting an email from a very harried mom with a three-year-old. I laugh about it still because I can relate! “YIKES!! My three-year-old wants me to help him with everything!! I need some activities and games for small children!” Not long after, I got an email from a mom who was homeschooling. She loved working with her eight-year-old, but she had two littles who made it difficult to give her older son the attention she wanted to. She needed some diversions for those little ones. She planned for all of them to be in the same room, but she needed her littles to be able to play happily without her help for short periods. Today I will share a HUGE list of activities that will keep your small children occupied for short periods leaving you free to work with an older child, do some chores, work from home, or do your reading and study. These activities come from many mothers so they are tried and true! /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29785608

I No Longer Have a Bucket List or Is Parenting the End of My Dreams! 01/28/2024

I No Longer Have a Bucket List or Is Parenting the End of My Dreams! Do you have cherished dreams? Is there a goal you want as much as breathing? Do you worry that because you chose to be a parent they may never come to pass? I can relate. I raised seven children. I was busy and overwhelmed lots of the time. I had goals and dreams and there were times I felt they could come to pass. Then, just when I felt I was moving towards them, I would be called home physically or emotionally and the dream would be on hold again. Today, I want to encourage you and give you heart, so will hold on to your dreams while you do this most important calling, raising your family. I have often said, “You can’t know until you get there.” I have gotten to a new place and in time, I believe you will get there too. Join me as I share the new place I have gotten and how it can give you hope for your dreams and goals. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29676603

Simple Techniques for Stress-Free Single Parenting 01/21/2024

Simple Techniques for Stress-Free Single Parenting Life as a single parent is a challenging journey, but it can also be filled with growth, resilience, and moments of joy. I have a daughter navigating this path, and it can be both painful and joyous watching her and her children as they move through this new territory. To manage well requires a blend of practical strategies and emotional fortitude. Understanding how to manage as a single parent, either a mom or dad, requires support and resources. In April of 2023, I posted an article by a fellow writer, Laura Pearson, filled with resources to assist parents returning to school. Today I am sharing another of her articles with resources for single parents. If you are a single parent this will probably not be new information for you, but I hope the included links will be useful in helping you move forward in investigating these and other resources that may be just what you need. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29570213

Are You Prepared for the New Year? 01/14/2024

Are You Prepared for the New Year? I no longer make New Year's Resolutions. Instead, I have a few useful tools I use. Today I will be talking about three ways you can put the coming year in order in your mind, and manifest what you want your life to look and feel like. Doing these simple steps has made the last ten years more powerful for me and I have been able to accomplish some BIG things, while busily working and caregivng. I hope you join me and discover what it is you want in the next three to five years. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29469628

Thoughts On My Wall 01/07/2024

Thoughts On My Wall Last week, I shared my daughter’s journey from a traumatic brain injury to a life of love and service. I shared one of the secrets to her success – she had taken charge of what she focused on. I, like my daughter, put ideas on my wall. I post on my walls thoughts and ideas that I want to understand and incorporate into my life and way of being. I thought it would be fun to share some of what I have on my walls with you. If it resonates you may want to post it on your walls. If not, enjoy the read and then find what does resonate. I have many thoughts from spiritual leaders in my faith. You will find the same in your faith. I have quotes from people I trust or admire. Some come from books I have read. If it rings true or is principle-based, it can find its way to a wall in my home. I hope you join me and learn a hack that will elevate your life. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29369203

You Are What You Think About and Focus On 12/31/2023

You Are What You Think About and Focus On In 2003, my world turned upside down when my daughter, Jenny, was hit head-on by a drunk driver going the wrong way on a California freeway. Five years later, I wrote an article about Jenny’s journey and how she turned a major head injury into a life worth living. Another eleven years have passed, and I have watched my daughter live these words – You are what you think about and focus on. Jenny's sixteen-year odyssey is powerful. If you find yourself frustrated, angry, discouraged, resentful, sad, feeling less than, or any number of other difficult emotions, then this is a true story for you. I know Jenny's recovery from an accident that left her unable to walk, think of the word for shoe, orange, etc., track conversations, manage social cues, or remember anything, was due to her preparation for life. Join me as I share her secret for living well, no matter the circumstances. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29281713

A Response to the Article on Dec. 17 - Tough Article - A Tender Mercy 12/21/2023

A Response to the Article on Dec. 17 - Tough Article - A Tender Mercy On December 17 I posted an article on my website and made a podcast called How to Enjoy Life More, Even When It's Hard. That same day I received a tender mercy that fit in perfectly with the theme of the article. I am sharing it here. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29176758

How to Enjoy Life More, Even When It's Hard 12/17/2023

How to Enjoy Life More, Even When It's Hard Today, although there are things I could share that would be less time-consuming and less emotionally draining, I am telling you about my morning. I am sharing this experience for a reason. After several decades of working on two principles, they can still trip me up. They are also stumbling blocks for many moms I talk with. I have written about them often, and I don’t want to beat a dead horse, but this is pivotal for our happiness and our ability to parent and relationship well. Join me as I share two principles, that when learned, must be practiced for a lifetime and as we do we will parent from a better place, have more stable relationships, and feel more peace. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29112253

Say Yes More Often Than No 12/10/2023

Say Yes More Often Than No My daughter has a saying she lives by and I have seen the amazing results in her family. "What if we said yes as often as we could and not only when we had to?" Join me today as I share three crazy family examples of how living this way can impact your family relationships in a BIG way. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/29003768

How Long Can You Carry the Weight? 12/03/2023

How Long Can You Carry the Weight? I walk daily. Walking is the only exercise I get because, as I understand it, you can’t count housework. LOL I walk five blocks. My sister, a fitness instructor, suggested I could employ the weights I carry better. I took her advice and began utilizing my weights in a new way. I raise one arm into the air and keep it lifted as I walk, for as long as I can. The pain begins slowly, but eventually, I must put my arm down. Then I lift the other arm and repeat the process. Then I let both arms swing by my side until I feel I can lift the weight again. I do at least two repetitions of each arm and sometimes three. Each month I can lift the weight longer. During one of my walks, I realized how much this exercise is like the caregiving I do every day and how much it’s like the parenting we’re all doing. Both are weights we carry. Sometimes, it becomes painful, and you wonder if you can keep it up. The truth is that to manage these weights well, we do eventually have to put our arm down, metaphorically speaking. We need a break. Join me as we talk about how to carry the weight of parenting with greater success. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28900228

The Power of I Love You 12/03/2023

The Power of I Love You Back in 2012, I read an article by Kerry Patterson of the , a company designed to build leaders and businesses. He has also helped designed to help people have better relationships in families, at work, and in communities. I have enjoyed reading his work for many years. This article, which was published around the holidays, beautifully showcased the power of love. I am sharing it with you because it is powerful. I hope it will bless you and help change your life. : ) /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28900308

Why I Decided to Commit to Meditation When I Said I Couldn't 11/19/2023

Why I Decided to Commit to Meditation When I Said I Couldn't On October 15th of this year, I posted an article called In the article, I listed ideas for becoming more aware of our own emotional state. Then I listed things I was committing to do for myself. At the end of the article, there was this P. S. “Mediation came up often on the lists. I have meditated in the past but right now, I can’t commit to it.” Join me as I share my meditation journey. I will share what I have done to make it workable and I will let you in on the amazing results I have gotten from my very simple meditation routine. You will find it all so doable no matter how busy you are and it will improve your busy days! /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28702258

What is Family Philanthropy 11/12/2023

What is Family Philanthropy November and December are perfect months to teach our children about gratitude and sharing. It’s an excellent time to review our family culture around giving and receiving. During these months, there are multiple opportunities to teach our children that no matter how wonderful it is to receive, giving brings deep satisfaction and joy. Today I want to share a few stories about family philanthropy, how it benefits children, how you can make it part of your family culture, and why it isn't just about giving money. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28598088

The Two-edged Sword of Innovation 10/29/2023

The Two-edged Sword of Innovation I like Kerry Patterson. He is a great writer and from my era, so I relate to everything he writes. Back in September 2012, Kerry about unplugging from the workplace, the difficulty and the benefits. I saw amazing parallels for a family. In the ensuing eleven years, I have seen what Kerry shared become even more challenging. Join me as I share thoughts, ideas, and facts on how technology may be causing your feelings of dissatisfaction and lack of family connectedness. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28447541

Don't Be a Mastodon 10/22/2023

Don't Be a Mastodon Last week I included in my weekly newsletter the link to a podcast I did a few weeks ago for . It was about managing change. Then this week, out of nowhere, I found myself faced with another possible change. It will require a shift in a hope I have held on to for a long time and an adjustment in how I deal with a current situation. This reminded me of where I was back in 2013 and some hard lessons I had to learn. I want to share what I learned in 2013 because it is so 2023. LOL Join me for some lessons on how life is like an onion and remaining happy when life takes turns you didn't plan for or expect. Here is the link I promised - https://open.spotify.com/episode/1zNJCE8XkBtm4ZbN3WEeIP /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28384613

Are You Self Aware? What Does That Even Look Like? 10/15/2023

Are You Self Aware? What Does That Even Look Like? Last spring, I was listening to a talk at church and the speaker gave a statistic that I found intriguing and a bit surprising. He said that most people think they are self-aware but that when tested only about 15% are. That is a low number of people who really know where they are emotionally, at any given time. You are probably not surprised that this information would catch my eye. After all, I did a little counseling for myself this year because I knew there were issues with my self-awareness which made it difficult to manage triggers and stress. So what does being self-aware look like, how does it impact your life, and what can you do to become more self-aware? Join me as we explore the answers to these questions and more. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28317530

Putting People Ahead of Projects. Can It Be Done 10/08/2023

Putting People Ahead of Projects. Can It Be Done I am a finisher. This will be important for you to remember as you read this article. Being a finisher is a blessing in my life and the lives of those I live with and serve. But it has its drawbacks. I can get caught up in projects and leave people behind. Learning to STOP what we are doing in favor of something that is truly more important, usually having to do with our spouse or children, is a process. I have had to learn to give myself space and time to keep practicing. Changing one’s way of being, whatever that may look like for you, takes intention, effort, consistency, and time. I have had to learn to forgive myself when I must be reminded that something else matters more than my current project. A change of heart, a new way of being, can take years to achieve and then it isn’t usually a done deal. We must be reminded occasionally of what we know and our new way of responding. Perfect rarely happens. Changing our way of being is not the same as ticking something off a list, like making your bed every morning. It is deeper and it matters more. Here are two stories that will become one and will give you a clear idea of what change takes and how important it is to grant yourself space and time for it. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28254914

Want to Laugh More, Remain Calmer, and Be Happier? 10/01/2023

Want to Laugh More, Remain Calmer, and Be Happier? If you had asked me twenty-five years ago if I had a sense of humor, I would have replied that fun and funny are not on top of my list. I don’t get jokes. I don’t see the humorous first. Getting stuff done is my thing. Being on time matters. Maintaining order is number one. I liked things and people to be a certain way. Because of this, I was easily frustrated or annoyed by situations and people, including my husband and kids. However, a decade and a half ago, when I began speaking and teaching, I was in for a shock. I made people laugh. I am no comedian, but I said things in a way that was humorous to an audience. People assured me of this all the time. : ) I would never have guessed that there was another side to me. Join me as I share my process of acknowledging this new view of myself and the changes required to make it an ongoing part of myself. I also share what is required to make this type of inner change, a personality shift, if you will. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28188857

Duality Matters in Parenting 09/24/2023

Duality Matters in Parenting I had a heart-to-heart conversation with my daughter, Kate, on pridefulness vs. pride. I recorded Part 1 and Part 2 of that conversation. This is part three. Join me as I share what duality is, how it looks in parenting, and why it matters. This was a great end to a powerful conversation. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28119149

As a Mother, You Won’t Know the Value You Bring Until Later 09/17/2023

As a Mother, You Won’t Know the Value You Bring Until Later Last week I shared a conversation I had with my daughter Kate on pride vs. pridefulness. It was illuminating. This week I am sharing the part of the conversation that blew me away and shows, yet again, that you can't know the value you bring as a mother, until later, even if you think you are doing a poor job. Join me and be heartened on your parenting journey. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/28054860

How We Talk about Ourselves Sends a Powerful Message to Our Children 09/10/2023

How We Talk about Ourselves Sends a Powerful Message to Our Children A few months ago, I had a conversation with one of my daughters on the issue of pride vs. pridefulness. It was amazing and insightful. Today I am going to share an experience my daughter had in sixth grade that taught her that girls and women should be self-deprecating to be accepted and liked. It will blow your socks off. You may even relate. Then we will delve into the difference between pride and pridefulness and how to help our kids to know the difference and allow themselves to take pride in their accomplishments. It matters! /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/27987543

Growing and Increasing in Wisdom One Thing at a Time 09/03/2023

Growing and Increasing in Wisdom One Thing at a Time This summer I took a few months off from writing. It was a wonderful rest, but in those off weeks, I had an experience that I want to share. When I read the book Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in Our Busy Lives by Wayne Muller, I created a list that allowed me to implement what I learned about rest, renewal, and space. But, I only implemented one item on the list. During my writing break, I found the list. Oh man, it was good! So I came up with a plan to intentionally implement more ways in my life for space thought and rest. Whether you are a spiritual person or not, whether you identify with God or not, you will love my list and what I learned. Join me and improve your own life. /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/27925023

Deadheading 06/18/2023

Deadheading The earth, if we are paying attention, can teach us so much symbolically, and metaphorically. Here is a lesson I was reminded of this week in my garden. Join me as I share a gardening concept - deadheading. It is a metaphor for life. Join me as I teach you what deadheading is and how it applies to you, your life, and your family. Life is never going to be perfect no matter how hard you try. When we can accept that, then we are free to enjoy the good job we are doing, despite the imperfections, especially in our parenting efforts. So learn how to deadhead. : ) /episode/index/show/gottalovefamily/id/27183117

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