Our Better Half

Sexologist Dr. Jane Fleishman, sex therapist Dr. Rosara Torrisi, and psychotherapist Dr. Sabitha Pillai-Friedman break down the beauty of human sexuality in the second half of life -- also known as the better half.

230: The Magic of Matchmaking 06/30/2026

229: Dr. Sarah Girardi: A Urologist's Perspective on Sexual Pleasure 06/28/2026

229: Dr. Sarah Girardi: A Urologist's Perspective on Sexual Pleasure On this episode of Our Better Half, we enjoy an in-depth conversation with Dr. Sarah Girardi, a trailblazing urologist and female sexual health specialist with over 25 years of experience. Together, we unpack the often-neglected world of older adults' sexual health. Dr. Girardi connects the physical and urological realities of aging to the broader relational and emotional aspects of intimacy, drawing on her extensive clinical background to bust long-standing myths and advocate for the well-being of her patients. A primary focus of the discussion revolves around the biological realities of aging and the critical importance of proper anatomical education. Dr. Girardi emphasizes that recurrent urinary tract infections (UTIs) in women—regardless of whether they are 20, 60, or 90 years old—are frequently tied to sexual activity, making sexual health history a vital component of standard urological care. She addresses the widespread misconception that painful sex or a compromised sex life is just an inevitable part of growing older that women must accept. Through her practice, Dr. Girardi uses direct, empathetic tools—like using a mirror during exams—to help women understand their own changing bodies and reclaim their sexual vitality. She notes that while physical intimacy changes over time, a lack of compliance from one's anatomy doesn't mean intimacy has to end; rather, partners can discover new ways to pleasure each other beyond standard penetration. The episode also highlights major medical milestones and clarifies the science behind female sexual health treatments. Dr. Girardi discusses the historic November 10, 2025, FDA announcement that officially removed the decades-old black box warning on topical vaginal estrogen, a decision rooted in safety data reviewed during an intensive hearing in September of that year. She explains that topical vaginal estrogen is not absorbed systemically, but instead safely restores a low pH and healthy lactobacillus to the vaginal ecosystem, serving as a powerful defense against life-threatening conditions like urosepsis in older women. Shifting the conversation to non-hormonal desire medications like flibanserin, Dr. Girardi clarifies the public discourse surrounding the "Female Viagra" misnomer. She notes that while Viagra works on a purely physical level by maintaining blood flow to an erection, female arousal and desire operate through complex neural pathways in the brain. Ultimately, Dr. Girardi urges both patients and practitioners to reject a compromised quality of life, navigate past historical fears like the 2002 Women's Health Initiative study, and embrace the healthcare solutions women rightfully deserve. If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/41699180

228: Lesbians: Aging on Their Own Terms in a Southern Cooperative 06/19/2026

228: Lesbians: Aging on Their Own Terms in a Southern Cooperative In this episode of Our Better Half, hosts Dr. Jane Fleishman, Dr. Sabitha Pillai-Friedman, and Dr. Rosara Torrisi welcome Jenifer "JJ" Firestone, a seasoned geriatric social worker and community organizer with a rich history of LGBTQ+ advocacy. JJ shares her journey from coordinating artificial insemination programs in Boston to pioneering a unique family structure where she co-parented her daughter through a landmark 35-page co-parenting legal decision with two fathers. Her extensive career in hospice and her personal experience caring for her own aging parents for six years have culminated in her latest and most ambitious mission: redefining the quality of life as we age. Now based in Weaverville, North Carolina, JJ is developing a 3.5-acre "mini-farm" model for what she calls Cooperatives for Vigorous Aging (CVA). This self-governing residential arrangement aims to house four to six individuals who wish to age in place with a focus on vibrant, meaningful companionship from "vigorous old age to death." By moving away from traditional senior living residences where rules are often dictated by others, the CVA model empowers residents to maintain autonomy and set their own standards. JJ highlights that while the concept is still in its pioneering stages, it offers a radical alternative for those who want to maintain self-determination in their later years. The conversation also delves into the significant societal barriers to intentional aging, particularly the deep-seated denial and taboo surrounding the process, which JJ notes is second only to the taboo of sex. She discusses the chutzpah and passion required to be an early adopter of such a model and the difficulty of finding fellow pioneers willing to invest in an unestablished future. Despite these challenges, JJ has found unexpected support from younger generations and has forged deep connections with her new Southern neighbors, regardless of political or religious divides. Listeners interested in following her progress or joining the cooperative can or reach out via email at . If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/41405385

227: Titans in Sexology: Teaching Sexual Health Providers How to Fish 05/22/2026

227: Titans in Sexology: Teaching Sexual Health Providers How to Fish Our guests this week are two accomplished sexuality professionals – Ms. Sue Goldstein and Dr. Irwin Goldstein. Sue and Irwin Goldstein have been titans in the field of sexology for some time now; they were there on May 14, 1998 when the first article on sildenafil (Viagra) was published with Irwin Goldstein as the first author. Ms. Sue Goldstein, a graduate of Brown University, is Sexuality Educator and Clinical Research Manager at San Diego Sexual Medicine (SDSM), responsible for sexual medicine educational programming and clinical research. She works with the SDSM team to develop clinical research projects, write protocols and oversee clinical trials. Ms. Goldstein co-authored to provide education and empowerment to women with sexual dysfunction. She is an associate editor of , and , and author of multiple peer reviewed papers. Ms. Goldstein is past president of the International Society for the Study of Women's Sexual Health (ISSWSH). She served on committees in the International Society for Sexual Medicine (ISSM) and Sexual Medicine Society of North America (SMSNA). She is also a member of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT), the Association of Clinical Research Professionals (ACRP) and the International Society for Medical Shockwave Therapy. Ms. Goldstein, an ISSWSH Fellow, received the Distinguished Service Award from ISSWSH in 2017 as well as from SMSNA in 2017, and along with her husband, the Transformatory Team Award from ISSM in 2024. Dr. Irwin Goldstein has been involved with sexual dysfunction research since the late 1970s. He has authored more than 380 publications as well as multiple book chapters and edited 7 textbooks in the field. His interests include surgery for dyspareunia, sexual health management post cancer treatment, persistent genital arousal disorder/genital dysesthesia, physiologic investigation of sexual function, and diagnosis and treatment of sexual dysfunction in all genders. Dr. Goldstein is Director of Sexual Medicine at University of California San Diego East Campus, and sees patients in his private practice, . He is a Clinical Professor of Urology and Voluntary Clinical Professor of Obstetrics, Gynecology, & Reproductive Sciences at University of California San Diego. He is past Editor-in-Chief of the International Journal of Impotence Research, The Journal of Sexual Medicine, and Sexual Medicine Reviews. He is Past President of the International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health (ISSWSH) and the Sexual Medicine Society of North America (SMSNA). He holds a degree in engineering from Brown University and received his medical degree from McGill University. The World Association for Sexual Health awarded the Gold Medal to Dr. Goldstein in 2009 in recognition of his lifelong contributions to the field, in 2012 he received the ISSWSH Award for Distinguished Service in Women’s Sexual Health, in 2013 he received the Lifetime Achievement Award from the SMSNA, and in 2014 he received the Lifetime Achievement Award from the International Society for Sexual Medicine (ISSM). He is happily married to his college sweetheart Sue, and together they have three children and five grandchildren. Listeners, if you would like to reach out to Ms. Sue Goldstein and/or Dr. Irwin Goldstein, check out the If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/41354655

226: Overcoming Sexual Losses in Older Adults 05/05/2026

225: Magnificent Sex: Research that Can Help You 04/19/2026

224: Relieving the Symptoms of Menopause 04/10/2026

223: Senior Sex: What I Wish I'd Known At My Age 03/22/2026

222: Menopause and Sexual Pleasure 03/11/2026

222: Menopause and Sexual Pleasure Our guest this time, Jane Epstein, is a nurse practitioner and a Menopause Society certified provider. She’s also an AASECT Certified Sex Counselor. She lives and practices in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Jane graduated as a nurse practitioner from the Yale University School of Nursing in 1989, followed by a one-year training in Adolescent Medicine at Yale Medical School. She practiced adolescent medicine for over 25 years before transitioning to adult women’s health and sexuality counseling. Jane first gravitated toward the topic of sexual health while working with adolescents. In the life of an adolescent, developing into a sexual being seemed to be the biggest thing happening– and the one that adults wanted to address with adolescents the least. In 2016, she gave a popular TEDx talk entitled, , which addressed female sexual pleasure, including masturbation, for young women. It’s a great talk! Since many sexually active young women know so little about sexual pleasure, Jane wondered when and where adult women learn about sexual pleasure. Her independent research, including interviews with menopausal women across the country, revealed that many women did not learn to orgasm until taught by their (usually) male partners. And many never learned how to prioritize their own sexual pleasure during partnered relationships. Subsequently, Jane became a Menopause Society Certified Provider and an ASSECT-certified Sex Counselor. She sees patients in Albuquerque, New Mexico for perimenopause and menopause care, as well as sexuality counseling. Her goal is to help women enjoy pain-free and pleasurable sex, as well as to optimize health through the midlife years and beyond. Jane spoke to our co-hosts Dr. Sabitha Pillai-Friedman and Dr. Jane Fleishman about the effects of genitourinary symptoms of menopause (GSM), the benefits of topical estrogen at different ages, the current research on hormonal therapies for younger women, older women, and transmen who have a vagina. She gives practical tips and breaks down the research in a language that makes lots of sense. If you’d like to check out the article she cited in the show, click . If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/40363235

221: Sex Education and Porn Literacy for Older Adults 03/02/2026

221: Sex Education and Porn Literacy for Older Adults Our guest this week is Dr. Jenn Pollitt! Jenn Pollitt, PhD is the Assistant Director of Gender, Sexuality and Women’s Studies and an Assistant Professor in the College of Liberal Arts at Temple University. She holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from Widener University. Dr. Pollitt currently serves on the Board of Directors of the Woodhull Freedom Foundation, a national organization dedicated to advancing sexual freedom as a fundamental human right through policy, law and education. With over 15 years of experience as a sexuality educator, Dr. Pollitt has developed and taught a wide range of undergraduate and graduate courses on topics including Men & Masculinities, Sexuality and Disability, Porn Literacy, Sexuality Education, and Pleasure. She has also created and facilitated trainings and curricula for professionals in nonprofit organizations, corporations, and labor unions—working with groups such as Lambda Legal, the American Medical Student Association, and Philadelphia’s Men’s Center for Growth and Change. Dr. Pollitt has developed the first comprehensive sexuality education course for law students, which launched this fall at Temple University’s Beasley School of Law. Her work focuses on sexual and erotic agency, LGBTQIA+ rights, reproductive justice, and the intersections of sex, law, and policy. She also examines the influence of popular culture as one of the most powerful—and under-acknowledged—sources of informal sex education in the U.S. Dr. Pollitt’s work and commentary have been featured in the New York Times, Washington Post, Slate, Psychology Today, HuffPost, Business Insider, The Philadelphia Inquirer, The 19th News, NPR, WHYY, and Doctor Radio. Listeners, you can find information about Dr. Pollitt and her publications ! If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/40278915

220: Innovations in Pelvic Floor Sexual Health 02/08/2026

219: Presence Over Performance as We Age 01/21/2026

219: Presence Over Performance as We Age Our guest this week is Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh, PhD. Dr. Nasserzadeh is an award-winning author, TED speaker, and world-renowned relational expert. She holds a PhD in social psychology and specializes in sexual health and relationships at both macro and micro levels. Dr. Nasserzadeh has served as a senior cultural advisor for governments, UN agencies, academic institutions, and Fortune 500 companies. She has authored multiple articles, books, and book chapters. Her newest book, , was the recipient of the Vincent Clark Award from the California Association for Marriage and Family Therapists for significant advancement of the field. Using proven research, Dr. Nasserzadeh explains how six essential ingredients – attraction, respect, trust, a shared vision, compassion, and loving behaviors – are needed for any thriving relationship, from the bedroom to the boardroom. These ingredients can be explored with any audience to establish a unified language, shared values, and common aspirations. Dr. Nasserzadeh’s work has been featured on NPR, the BBC, ABC, CNN, The New York Times, The Times, CNBC, and USA Today, among others. Dr. Nasserzadeh has been a board member of several professional organizations, including the California Psychological Association, the American Association for Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT), and the World Association for Sexual Health (WAS). She is widely recognized as a trailblazer in the field of relational science and has been honored by peers and esteemed institutions alike, including the British Council for her contributions to social impact; Pfizer Inc. with its Innovation of the Year Award during her tenure as global chair of the Customer Insights Council; the BBC World Service for Innovation of the Year for her groundbreaking sexuality education program; and AASECT with its Award for Professional Excellence. Clinically, she is an approved training provider, senior accredited member, and registered supervisor with AASECT, as well as a registered supervisor with the College of Sex and Relationship Therapists in the UK (COSRT). Since moving to California, she is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (AMFT) and a member of the California Association for Marriage and Family Therapists (CAMFT). To learn more about Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh, visit her , , and follow her on . If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/39770850

218: Masturbation and Menopause: New Research 12/17/2025

217: All Sex is Queer Sex (Especially For Older Adults) 11/26/2025

217: All Sex is Queer Sex (Especially For Older Adults) Our guest this time is Stephen Duclos, and his interest in aging is partly because he has been doing social change work for decades and sees aging as just one more civil rights horizon. He’s also interested in aging because he’s a sex therapist, and he sees all sex as queer sex when it comes to aging adults. Stephen has been working as a therapist and counselor since 1972. He currently holds licenses and national certifications in Sex Therapy (as a CST), Couples and Family Therapy (LMFT), Mental Health Counseling (LMHC), and Rehabilitation Counseling (CRC). Stephen is an Approved Supervisor with the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT), and AASECT (the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists). He is also a member of the American Family Therapy Academy. In 2012, he received the Patricia Schiller award from AASECT for his work on Fathers, Adolescent Daughters, and Sexuality. And in 2022, he was featured in a cover story in the NY Times Magazine about sex over 70. Jane first met Stephen at an AASECT conference and was immediately struck by his candor, and they have been teaching social workers and students of sex therapy ever since. He is always up for a new challenge and is one of the most thoughtful clinicians she knows. He has been a teacher and supervisor of therapists as an adjunct faculty member of UMass/Boston and is a principal faculty member in the Sex Therapy Training program at South Shore Sexual Health Center. He has also taught at Boston Medical Center and Harvard Medical School. He is vitally interested in intimacy, aging, fathers and daughters, and long-term sexual relationships. Stephen has also been involved in civil rights work for more than 50 years. From registering voters for the Boston Election Commission in 1967, to helping establish the second Independent Living Center in the US for people with disabilities in the 1970s, to establishing biracial councils in the Boston Public Schools during desegregation through the late 1980s, to supporting liberation for the queer community, civil rights has been part of his ongoing, lifelong community work. His interest in aging comes in large part from his commitment to being a therapist, seeing older clients, and threading the aging process in the tapestry of his own life. He is fierce, tender, brilliant, and a great teacher and learner. He wanted to expand his teaching practice by working with a sex educator, and Jane was so pleased that he invited her in because she loves teaching with him, always learning something new, as we did in this conversation. Listeners, if you’d like to learn more about Stephen and his work, you can find more information . If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/39106870

216: Students Innovating: Creating Sex Positive Senior Living Communities 11/21/2025

215: Sex CAN Get Better with Age 10/29/2025

214: Together 68 Years: You Can't Just Put Your Relationship on a Shelf 10/22/2025

213: Cultivating Intention through Curiosity Across the Lifespan 10/02/2025

212: Aging with Sexual Wellness: Like a Fine Wine 09/14/2025

211: Season 11 Teaser 08/17/2025

210: Challenging Sexual Ageism in Our Work as Therapists and Educators 06/15/2025

209: Providing Trans-Affirmative Care 06/02/2025

208: Groove Thing 05/19/2025

207: Combatting Ageism Through Sexual Pleasure 05/05/2025

206: Trans and Queer Centered Therapy 04/21/2025

205: An Intergenerational Look at Teaching Sex Therapy 04/01/2025

205: An Intergenerational Look at Teaching Sex Therapy Our guests this time are the dynamic duo, mother/daughter team of The Buehler Institute, Dr. Stephanie Buehler and Anneka Buehler. Stephanie Buehler, MPW, PsyD, CST-S, IF, is a licensed psychologist, AASECT-certified sex Therapist and Supervisor, and Fellow of the International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health. She is the President of The Buehler Institute and , which provides APA, AASECT, NBCC, and California BRN-approved inclusive continuing education in sex therapy and sexuality counseling. In addition to pelvic pain disorders and using the sexological ecosystemic approach she developed, Dr. Buehler has written about and lectured on the intersection of sexuality and sexual identity, thriving after breast and prostate cancer; neurodivergent sexuality and relationships; post-trauma recovery of sexual function and pleasure; counseling for couples; infertility, pregnancy, and post-partum issues; and menopause and other lifespan concerns affecting women. She provides AASECT individual and group supervision and case consultation to therapists. She is the author of several books, including the third edition of . Anneka Buehler, MEd, is a recent graduate of George Mason University with a master’s degree in counseling. She is the Vice President of The Buehler Institute and is a true multi-tasker responsible for directing day-to-day operations, marketing and social media, and content development. Ms. Buehler is an intern at a group practice that serves DC, Maryland, and Virginia. Her areas of concentration include working with neurodiverse clients, trauma, pelvic pain, and kink, and she has extensive experience with the LGBTQ+ population. If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/35956160

204: The Sex Bible for People Over 50 03/17/2025

203: Building Hope: Advocacy for Older Adults During Terrible Times 03/03/2025

202: Finding Your Way Back to Sex in Long-Term Relationships 02/18/2025

201: Developing a Liberatory Pleasure Practice 02/03/2025

201: Developing a Liberatory Pleasure Practice This episode explores the significance of intergenerational learning and social/racial justice within the sexual health field. We had the joy of interviewing Mariotta Gary-Smith about her experiences of mentorship from Black women/femme elders that also inspired the trajectory of her career as a social justice actionable agitator. Mariotta Gary-Smith (she/her/Queen [reserved]) is a 3rd generation social justice agitator & Oregonian. Her family history of civil rights seeded her interest in social justice - she found human sexuality on her own. After high school, Mariotta earned degrees from Agnes Scott College and the Rollins School of Public Health at Emory University. In Fall 2008, she was one of five nationally selected Fellowship Scholars for the Inaugural Class at the Center of Excellence for Sexual Health (CESH) housed at the Morehouse School of Medicine. In 2009, Mariotta co-founded the Women of Color Sexual Health Network (WoCSHN; pronounced ‘wok-shyn’) – an online-based, collective organization for BIPOC (Black, Indigenous and People of Color) women/femme-identifying/gender-expansive sexuality professionals. In 2012, Mariotta joined with 6 other Oregon-based BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, People of Color/of the Global Majority) women and femmes that formed the Founding Advisory Committee of the We Are BRAVE! Project, a cohort policy project housed at Western States Center (Portland, OR.) This collective was a foundational part of the local political movement that resulted in Oregon passing the Reproductive Health Equity Act (RHEA) in 2017 – the singular most progressive reproductive health law in the United States to date. With a well-respected reputation for thoughtful, challenging and honest learning experiences centering racial justice, equity, sexuality and social critique, Mariotta continues to offer strategic thought partnership & collaborative consultation with various organizations about racial justice in sexuality education and the Sexuality profession. With over 20 years of experience, Mariotta remains committed to holding space that supports clear & accountable learning on the intersections of social justice, sexual health, equity and “actionable agitation.” She’s fully invested in her ‘passion work’ – focusing on Black folks and Black sexuality and moving their experience from the margins to the center. You can read Mariotta’s contribution about cultivating a liberatory care practice to the Sexuality Social Justice open access resource . If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on and . It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening! /episode/index/show/our-better-half/id/35094220

Our Better Half

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