Dirty Sons of Pitches
Every week, Nate and Ben, with the occasional special guest, talk movies and then play a series of movie-related games, including the central game, The Pitch, wherein our heroes take a concept and try and turn it into a working movie. Most of the time the podcasts will just descend into girlish laughter. Other reoccurring games include Defend Yourself, where one person must defend their enjoyment of an indefensible movie, Sequel-ize It, Porno-ize It, Recast It, Genre Swap, Adapt the Unadaptable, Disney-fy-It, and Vanity Project, wherein our heroes tailor a movie project to a star.
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Ep. 235: We pitch a new Hellboy on the spot (and it's damn good), plus Star Wars IX
04/17/2019
Ep. 235: We pitch a new Hellboy on the spot (and it's damn good), plus Star Wars IX
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are trying a new hybrid game/pitch this week in honor of the astounding "Hellboy" reboot, so the guys will pitch a new version of a Hellboy movie using random plot elements decided by dice rolls every so often. It's amazing that it's not only cohesive, and awesome, but easily better than the film in theaters. The guy then close out another podcast with America's favorite game, the "So Shalit Be" of "So Shalit Be" games. Available on iTunes Episode 235 includes: -Star Wars is back with a TV show, a new trailer for Episode IX, a new title, and more... of the old. -"Missing Link" is the least Laika film yet but still charming. -Nate declares "Dragged Across Concrete" is one of the best films of 2019. -Ben is flabbergasted by the "Hellboy" reboot. -This Week's Pitch -- Switch the Pitch (Hellboy)! -The guys roll a dice to select new plot additions (New Character/Flashback/Plot Twist/Action Scene/Death Scene/Sex Scene) and pitch, on the spot, a new "Hellboy" and it is awesome. This lasts a half hour! -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys conclude with another rousing edition of impersonating film critic/social deviant Gene Shalit and coming up with increasingly absurd blurbs for films.
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Ep. 234: Tim Burton, Dumbo, Shazam!, and their (first) movie
04/09/2019
Ep. 234: Tim Burton, Dumbo, Shazam!, and their (first) movie
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have come to an auspicious moment in the history of their podcast with the release of their first honest-to-goodness movie, being two of the credited writers attached to a low-budget Netflix film. The guys pitch Tim Burton vehicles in honor ofthe new live-action "Dumbo" and conclude with another rendition of America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be," this time with the illustrious Gene Shalit providing a blurb for a movie they have written (and was rewritten). Available on iTunes Episode 234 includes: -So... the guys have a movie on Netflix now. That's a thing. -The new "Joker" back-story trailer reminds you that clowns can also be upsetting. -The guys enjoy "Shazam!" and Ben dubs it the finest DCU movie so far. -"Serenity" might have the strangest twist for the year. -"Dumbo" is a mostly enjoyable whimsical charm. This Week's Pitch -- Tim Burton Vehicles! -The guys pitch remakes, comic properties, and other stories for Tim Burton to adapt in his style. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys imitate the style of pun-heavy TV film critic Gene Shalit to review the various movies covered this week including their own.
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DSOP Presents -- Saturday Night Jive -- "Epic Movie" (2007)
03/30/2019
DSOP Presents -- Saturday Night Jive -- "Epic Movie" (2007)
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" were unable to record this week but in their stead enjoy one of the angriest, most analytical podcasts yet from Ben and George on their "Saturday Night Jive" podcast where they review bad and strange movies starring SNL alums. This week they tackle the epic badness that is 2007's "Epic Movie" and the comedy curse that are Friedberg & Seltzer, writers and directors that confuse references with jokes. Get ready for the pain and enjoy the frustrating and disbelief as Ben and George try and make sense of the madness. Available on iTunes
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Ep. 233: Us, dopplegangers, the return of James Gunn
03/26/2019
Ep. 233: Us, dopplegangers, the return of James Gunn
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are looking over their shoulders and questioning mirrors after Jordan Peele's newest horror movie, "Us." and In honor of that film, the guys pitch movies about clones and dopplegangers, and then they wrap up this podcast in grand tradition with America's favorite game, So Shalit Be. Available on iTunes Episode 233 includes: -James Gunn is back aboard "Guardians of the Galaxy 3" and Disney finally consumes the last of Fox. -Is this the death of the mid-tier movie? -"Captive State" feels like a neat mini-series smashed into a disappointing two-hour movie. -Ben finds "Christopher Robin" to be horrifying. -Jordan Peele's "Us" is spooky and fun... and drops the ball in the third act. -This Week's Pitch -- Dopplegangers! -Nate pitches twins dating the same woman and getting into trouble with elected office. -Ben pitches a series where anyone can do whatever they want with a disposable clone, a man hunts his pwn clones for sport, and the U.S. government must kill a clone of the president once the real deal dies secretly. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys take this week's reviewed movies and channel famed critic Gene Shalit to come up with pun-laden nonsense blurbs for each title.
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Ep. 232: Captain Marvel, MCU prequels, Oscar recap, and the grossest "So Shalit Be" yet?
03/12/2019
Ep. 232: Captain Marvel, MCU prequels, Oscar recap, and the grossest "So Shalit Be" yet?
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back and celebrating the high-flying first of the Marvel Cinematic Universe with their first female-lead film, the titular "Captain Marvel." The guys pitch prequel movies highlighting other unknown chapters from the MCU and close out the podcast with a wild edition of America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be." Available on iTunes Episode 232 includes: -Oscars 2019 recap: the good, the bad, and the "Green Book." -R.I.P. Luke Perry and Albert Finney and Jussie Smollett's career. -"How to Train Your Dragon 3" is surprisingly poor. -If you needed another reason to be uncomfortable with creepy Michael Jackson, might we suggest the 4-hour documentary, "Leaving Neverland." -"Captain Marvel" is a fine if flawed 90s superhero adventure. Suck it, haters. -This Week's Pitch -- MCU prequels! -Ben pitches various prequels highlighting unknown prior chapters in time for the Marvel Cinematic Universe. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys take the movies reviewed this week and develop increasingly insane Gene Shalit-style blurbs for each. Wait until the end on this one.
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Ep. 231: Legos, Battle Angel, and a Polar vortex of suck
02/20/2019
Ep. 231: Legos, Battle Angel, and a Polar vortex of suck
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have a litany of news to get through and several movies to get caught up with, leading into the big February releases of "Alita: Battle Angel" and "The Lego Movie 2," and in honor of that block-headed family movie, the guys are pitching Lego movies and series. They conclude with America's favorite game, So Shalit Be, where they adopt the spirit of Gene Shalit to provide blurbs for this week's catalogue of movies reviewed. Available on iTunes Episode 231 includes: -Gropers of the Week: Ryan Adams, R. Kelly, and Max Landis staging a comeback. -Stop me if you've heard this before: the Oscars came up with a terrible idea that everyone thought as terrible. -The long-awaited live-action "Alita: Battle Angel" is... fine, big weird anime eyes and all. -Netflix's "Polar" is gratuitous in every possible way. -"Lego Movie 2" might not be as fresh but it's still a highly enjoyable family film. -This Week's Pitch -- Lego Movies! -Ben pitches Lego sequels to other existing franchises as well as a movie where their very building blocks are sold as a commodity in a class system. -This Wee's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys play another round of imitating notable film critic Gene Shalit when it comes to delivering blurbs for the films reviewed on this podcast.
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DSOP Presents -- Saturday Night Jive -- "I Feel Pretty" (2018)
02/12/2019
DSOP Presents -- Saturday Night Jive -- "I Feel Pretty" (2018)
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have been down from some bad weather and mismatched schedules, so in the meantime, please enjoy the podcast that Ben records regularly with his brother George, "Saturday Night Jive," where the guys watch and analyze a strange film starring an SNL alum. "I Feel Pretty" stars Amy Schumer as a regular woman who hits her head and suddenly thinks of herself as a slim beauty and struts her stuff. As Ben says, "I don't know if we've ever watched a movie so conceptionally wrong." Can it be saved? Listen to a highly analytical, engaging podcast all about beauty standards, feminism, "El Kabong" logic, and the business failings of a bizarre GroupDate website promotion. Available on iTunes
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Ep. 230: Glass, director universes, Oscar nominations
01/31/2019
Ep. 230: Glass, director universes, Oscar nominations
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are bundling up during the winter col and polar vortexes and getting lost in the combined cinematic universes of different directors. In honor of "Glass," the guys pitch on the spot shared universes for the films of various directors. Then they end things with America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be," and once again imitate the highly imitateable Gene Shalit to come up with film blurbs for movies covered Available on iTunes. Episode 230 includes: -More bad news for Bryan Singer but will it matter to the people with money? -Oscar nominations are here and Ben doesn't care. -The feel-good film "Stan & Ollie" answers the question of what John C. Reilly would look like in a big fat suit. -"Glass" may not have been worth an 18-year wait for fans, but it's still entertaining. -This Week's Pitch -- Directorial Shared Universes! -The guys pitch shared stories for the films of Steven Spielberg, Martin Scorsese, -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys go back through the movies of the episode and produce Gene Shalit-quality blurbs for each that inevitably descend into madness.
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Ep. 229: Bird Boxing, Holmes & Watson good?, escape rooms, and Grover F bombs
01/13/2019
Ep. 229: Bird Boxing, Holmes & Watson good?, escape rooms, and Grover F bombs
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are going without their blindfolds to explain the popularity of "Bird Box," the new Netflix horror thriller where everyone, including your mother, has watched it and has soemthing to say. In honor of the new January release "Escape Room," the guys pitch movies to be adapted into real-life escape rooms and how it would best work. To round out the episode, the guys play America's favorite game, "So Shalit Be," and ring in the new year right. Available on iTunes Episode 229 includes: -Kevin Hart may come back to the Oscars, Louis C.K. may come back, but are both wanted at this time? -Ben shockingly loved "Holmes and Watson." No joke. -"The Mule" does NOT involve Clint Eastwood putting drugs up his butt. You've been warned. -"Bird Box" is a Netflix sensation and it's... not really that good. -This Week's Pitch - Movie Escape Rooms! -The guys pitch movies to be applied to the escape room concept, including "Panic Room," "The Shining," "Saw" and "Cube," and "Jurassic Park." -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys take the movies reviewed on this week's show and give them the ole Gene Shalit blurb/madness treatment that icnreasingly becomes more insane and vulgar.
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Ep. 228: The Best and Worst Films of 2018
01/02/2019
Ep. 228: The Best and Worst Films of 2018
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are revealing their favorite and least favorites films of 2018. Stick around as they debate the highest highs, lowest lows and whether "A Wrinkle in Time" or "Mary Poppins" were originally good sources to begin with. Available on Tunes. Episode 228 includes: -The Best films of 2018 -Overrated and Underrated films -The Worst films of 2018 -The Rooney Mara Eats a Pie Award for the Best/Worst sequences of 2018
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Ep. 227: Kevin Spacey creepazoid, Marwen, and finally... Show Dogs
01/01/2019
Ep. 227: Kevin Spacey creepazoid, Marwen, and finally... Show Dogs
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are readying their best and worst films of 2018, but before they get into the particulars they have some news items and other films to review. This is Part One of the massive end of the year retrospective that was too big for one podcast. Part Two will be uploaded shortly but until then enjoy the boys trying to make sense of Kevin Spacey, "The Playmobil Movie," "Show Dogs," and "Welcome to Marwen" and other 2018 moments of curiosity. Available on iTunes. Episode 227 includes: -Kevin Spacey is not going away quietly and it's utterly bizarre. Will he monologue to the cameras in court? -Trailer reactions to Jordan Peele's "Us," "Brightburn," and the "Lego Movie" ripoff, "The Playmobil Movie." -The guys have finally watched "Show Dogs" and lived to tell the tale. -"Welcome to Marwen" is powerfully misguided. -Surprisingly, "Hotel Transylvania 3" and "Smallfoot" are both good films about tolerance and the power of skepticism. Stay tuned for Part Two -- Best/Worst of 2018 Film!
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Ep. 226: Aquaman, Vice, Bumblebee, and Before and After Shaft Time
12/26/2018
Ep. 226: Aquaman, Vice, Bumblebee, and Before and After Shaft Time
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are closing out he year by reviewing some of the biggest blockbusters of the holiday season, "Aquaman" and "Bumblebee," both movies pivotal to the longevity of their larger franchises. The guys pitch "kid and their dog" stories across an array of settings and genres in honor of the formula for "Bumblebee," and then they close out 2018 by playing one more rendition of "So Shalit Be," coming up with blurbs for each film reviewed. Happy 2019, listeners, and get ready for a Best/Worst of 2018 next. Available on iTunes. Episode 226 includes: -Trailer reactions to "Hellboy" reboot and "Men in Black International" reboot are both shurgs. -R.I.P. Penny Marshall, the superior Marshall. -"Aquaman" is enough fun for Nate, but Ben wants it to sink to the bottom. -"Bumblebee" makes you wish they had been making these kinds of Transformers movies from the start. -This Week's Pitch -- A Kid and Their Dog Tales! -Nate pitches a boy and his pet zombie. -Ben pitches a boy and his cannibal bodyguard, a boy and his dog/werewolf dad, a boy and his robot friend/suit, a woman and the robotic moon, and a Bigfoot family adventure. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys play America's favorite game as they look back at the movies this week and come up with Gene Shalit-inspired blurbs for each one.
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Ep. 225: Spider-Verse, Mortal Engines, and more movie gauntlet
12/23/2018
Ep. 225: Spider-Verse, Mortal Engines, and more movie gauntlet
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have another round of movies to speed through in an attempt to catch up, ending on the incredible new animated film, "Into the Spider-Verse." In honor of the film, the guys pitch movies from parallel comic worlds. The guys also play another edition of America's favorite game, So Shalit Be, coming up with increasingly bizarre pun-laden blurbs for the movies reviewed this episode to honor the legacy of Gene Shalit. Episode 225 includes: -The worst song of all time has been unleashed. Have your ears try and comprehend Pitbull's "Ocean 2 Ocean." -Gropers of the Week: Michael Weatherly and Neil deGrasse Tyson. -Nate reviews the likes of "Creed II," "Death of a Nation," "Green Book," "Roma," and "Mowgli." Ben reviews "Old Man and the Gun" and "Vox Lux." -The two of them then review "The Favourtie," "Mary Queen of Scots," "Mortal Engines, and "Into the Spider-Verse," the best 2018 animated film. This Week's Pitch -- Parallel Comic Worlds! -Nate pitches a crossover between the Fantastic Four and the better film Fantastic Four, the Incredibles. -Ben pitches the Canon films version of Spider-Man, the 1970s Japanese Spider-Man, Victorian era superheroes, and Star Trek superheroes. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys take all of the many, many movies they reviewed this week and find appropriate and inappropriate blurbs from the mind of Gene Shalit.
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What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- "Mary Poppins Returns"
12/18/2018
What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- "Mary Poppins Returns"
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" were not expecting this. They were not expecting a movie so cringe-inducing, maddening, and filled with artificial whimsy that bordered on delusional sadism. The new sequel "Mary Poppins Returns" get the guys going like few others as they try and make sense of what they have just watched as if they have witnessed a Lovecraftian god, which Mary Poppins just might be. Enjoy their lively and disturbed critical and comical analysis of the Disney movie that begs to be belittled and feel bad for Emily Blunt and Lin Manuel-Miranda. And you thought "A Wrinkle in Time" was a bad move for Disney. Just you wait. Just you wait. Available on iTunes.
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DSOP Presents -- Saturday Night Jive/Head Cannon Crossover - "Delgo" (2008)
12/08/2018
DSOP Presents -- Saturday Night Jive/Head Cannon Crossover - "Delgo" (2008)
While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are busy working on several writing projects, here's another edition of the other podcast Ben and his brother record on a weekly basis, "Saturday Night Jive," where the guys discuss an SNL-alum's very bad movie. This week it's the notorious animated flop that used to be the lowest grossing wide release of all time, "Delgo." It's a special episode of "Saturday Night Jive" combined with Ben's other podcast, "Head Cannon," which makes this a TRIPLE CROSSOVER in the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" podcast universe. Enjoy George and Ben trying to make sense of the senseless. Available on iTunes.
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Ep. 224: Turkey Day movie gauntlet, Fantastic Beasts 2, RIP Stan Lee
11/23/2018
Ep. 224: Turkey Day movie gauntlet, Fantastic Beasts 2, RIP Stan Lee
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back and might be dipping out again soon for other projects, but in the meantime they've got a bounty, a feast of movies to talk about. They limit each movie to four minutes and run through a gauntlet of ten recent releases. The guys also pitch movies set in the Harry Potter universe in honor of the second "Fantastic Beasts" movie, and then they finish off this podcast with a holiday treat, another rendition of America's favorite game, So Shalit Be. Available on iTunes. Episode 224 includes: -Is it possible that "Detective Pikachu" might actually be a good movie? -R.I.P. Marvel comics iconoclast Stan Lee. Excelsior. -Nate runs through five movies he's seen on his own: "Blue My Mind," "The Girl in the Spider's Web," "Bohemian Rhapsody," "Ballad of Buster Scruggs," and "Widows." -The guys run through a gauntlet of new releases: "Suspiria," "The Grinch," "Border," "Fantastic Beasts 2," and "Ralph Wrecks the Internet." -This Week's Pitch -- Potter Universe! -Nate pitches a look at the wizards vs humans conflict in different eras hinted at with "Fantastic Beasts." -Ben pitches an Azkaban prison break movie and other movies but, come on, how can we not get an Azkaban prison break movie? That's awesome. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys come up with increasingly vulgar blurbs for Gene Shalit as they spin through ten movies.
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DSOP Presents: Saturday Night Jive -- "The Love Guru" (2008)
11/04/2018
DSOP Presents: Saturday Night Jive -- "The Love Guru" (2008)
While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are busy with another writing project, so in the meantime enjoy a podcast from Ben and his brother George, "Saturday Night Jive," where the two of them watch and analyze movies starring SNL alums. This week it's one of the biggest SNL stars, Mike Myers, and one of the biggest bombs, "The Love Guru," a woefully misguided crass comedy that all but killed Myers' comedy career. Ten years later, is it as bad as remembered, or will the boys find it to be a hidden gem akin to their reappraisal of Adam Sandler's "Jack and Jill" Available on iTunes.
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Ep. 223: Coming of Age, Melissa McCarthy, and blackface backlash
10/29/2018
Ep. 223: Coming of Age, Melissa McCarthy, and blackface backlash
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are tuning into the mid 90s, a glorious time to be alive, thanks to Jonah Hill's directorial debut, appropriately called, "Mid90s." They're pitching coming of age projects, though assume they have covered this topic previously on a podcast over 220 episodes now. In addition, the guys play a game of Vanity Project to try and get Melissa McCarthy's career in a better place, and the gents round out another episode with America's favorite game -- So Shalit Be. Alogn the way the guys talk about an auditory Terrence Malick, the role piracy has in film preservation, the punishment Ann Dowd must forever pay in movies, the absence of new Christopher Guest films, and a new take on a not-classic nobody has seen, 1990's "Loose Cannons." Available on iTunes. Episode 223 includes: -R.I.P. FilmStruck streaming service and Megyn Kelly's news career at NBC. Only one due to blackface comments. -Reboots ahoy for the "Pirates of the Caribbean," "Killer Klowns from Outer Space," and "Critters." Guess which makes Ben the happiest. -Melissa McCarthy impresses just enough in the just good enough true-story, "Can You Ever Forgive Me?" -Jonah Hill's "Mid90s" is a slight but mostly enjoyable ode to being young and it also has perhaps the most awkward "sex scene" of 2018 cinema. -This Week's Pitch -- Coming of Age (II?)! -Ben pitches a time-traveling "Stand By Me," kids coming of age during a zombie apocalypse, kids fighting for the return of the Halloween of old, and a young child rejecting the MAGA path of his family -This Week's Game -- Vanity Project! -Ben and Nate discuss a project for Melissa McCarthy that would make the best use of her acting talents. -Bonus Game: So Shalit Be! -The guys come up with Gene Shalit-worthy blurbs for the movies they reviewed this week, "Can You Ever Forgive Me?" and "Mid90s."
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Ep. 222: New Halloween, sequel skips, Star is Born and Women in Horror
10/22/2018
Ep. 222: New Halloween, sequel skips, Star is Born and Women in Horror
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are getting spooky in preparation for this Hallow's Eve and watching the new remake "Halloween" which takes place 40 years after the original. It's intended to skip the other sequels and so the guys pitch other new editions that pretend the earlier sequels never existed. They also play another round of America's favorite game, So Shalit Be. Along the way learn all about the imprisonment of Fan Bingbing, Ben's pending litigation, a sad state of affairs for Kurt Russell, and a lot about horror franchises from the 80s and 90s. Available on iTunes. Episode 22 includes: -China releases a popular movie star from house arrest and the DCU welcomes James Gunn to their party. -Producer Jason Blum says there aren't women interested in making horror movies. About that... -"First Man" is mostly boring and "Bad Times at the El Ray" is thrilling. They're both 141 minutes long. Choose wisely. -Nate saw the latest (not) midnight movie from (not) cult filmmaker, Neil Breen. -The new "Halloween" is one half not so great and one half kinda great. It's confusing. -This Week's Pitch -- Sequel Skips! -The guys come up with pitches for new editions of famous sci-fi and horror franchises that forget the earlier sequels. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -Another episode of new film titles are given the Gene Shalit treatment for pun-heavy reviews and an increasingly depraved sense of Shalit.
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DSOP Presents: Saturday Night Jive -- "Million Dollar Mystery" (1987)
10/14/2018
DSOP Presents: Saturday Night Jive -- "Million Dollar Mystery" (1987)
While the "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are keeping busy with some writing projects, enjoy a fascinating film showcased on Ben's other podcast he records regularly with his brother George, "Saturday Night Jive," an SNL-related podcast that reviews bad movies starring SNL alums. "Million Dollar Mystery" is a "Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" ripoff that was born as a, for real, real scavenger hunt to the public sponsored by Glad trash bags. It's truly bizarre and Ben and George love it. Give it a listen and you may fall in love too. Available on iTunes.
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What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- "Venom"/ Head Cannon cross-over!
10/07/2018
What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- "Venom"/ Head Cannon cross-over!
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have scraped all the alien goo they can off the bottom of their shoes to discuss the hot mess that is Sony's "Venom," a Spider-Man villain without Spider-Man in a world possibly unrelated to the MCU. Ben and Nate try and make sense of this senseless movie and while Nate finds the occasional item to enjoy Ben is adamant about the overall terribleness. The guys break down the film, its awful and on-the-nose post-credit scene, Tom Hardy's acting, the number system when it comes to human body secretions, and then in a crossover with Ben's solo podcast "Head Cannon," the guys pitch out the extended cinematic universe for "Venom" across ten different mediums including sequel, prequel, spin-off, cross-over, video game, and porn parody. Available on iTunes.
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Ep. 221: Women strike back, Kavanaugh, Fahrenheit 11/9 & Assassination Nation
09/28/2018
Ep. 221: Women strike back, Kavanaugh, Fahrenheit 11/9 & Assassination Nation
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are getting political with the Age of Trump and the recent Brett Kavanaugh hearings over accusations of his boyhood sexual assaulting. The guys are pitching movies and projects where women fight back against the larger patriarchy, and then after it's another edition of everyone's favorite game. So Shalit Be. Along the way you'll hear all about the horrifying knowledge of what Trump's genitals look like, whether Michael Moore is still relevant and the Trump-to-hitler comparisons are justified, the lasting power of "The Twilight Zone," the horrifying sexy "Handmaid's Tale" Halloween outfit, and the power of baugettes as a visual indicator. Available on iTunes Episode 221 includes: -In other groper news, the Supreme Court might have a sexual assaulting judge soon... -New James Bond director and possibly a new Bond -"The House with a Clock in Its Walls" is a fun kids movie from the director of "Hostel." Huh? -Michael Moore's "Fahrenheit 11/9" throws a lot out there and might ultimately be hopeless. -Ben and Nate rave that "Assassination Nation" is a knockout and one of the best movies of 2018. -This Week's Pitch -- Women Fight Back! -Ben pitches a vigilante team fighting the sexual predators and harassers out there, a telekinetic rape revenge film, and the First Lady as a double agent. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys take turns offering blurbs in the form of favorite film critic Gene Shalit for this weeks films reviewed on the show.
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Ep. 220: Predators and hunting, The Nun, and Peppermint in your butt
09/18/2018
Ep. 220: Predators and hunting, The Nun, and Peppermint in your butt
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are on the warpath this week thanks to the new big screen return of the 80s action star with Shane Black's "The Predator." The guys are pitching properties related to hunters/hunting and play another rendition of America's favorite game, So Shalit Be. Along the way they discuss the whether a "the" counts as a word, the finer habits of masturbatory disposal, whether the "Peppermint" trailer says what it sounds like it says, whether reformed sex offenders should be in movies, the etiquette of movie going with stupid talky kids, and perhaps the most wild and bizarre account of Gene Shalit's after hours activities yet. Available on iTunes. Episode 220 includes: -Henry Cavil hangs up his tights at Superman. -Gropes of the Week: Les Moonves and Steven Wilder Striegel. -"Mandy" is a mess and so is "The Nun," but one is slightly more tolerable for Ben. -The guys disagree over revenge thriller "Peppermint" and whether the trailer indicates that the candy should be found in a place most uncomfortable. -Shane Black's "The Predator" is too little of too many things, but hey, it says autism is the next stage in human evolution. -This Week's Pitch -- Hunting/Hunters! -Ben pitches a reverse "Most Dangerous Game," a mother/daughter team hunting bad boyfriends, and a nationwide manhunt open to the public orchestrated by a vengeful President Trump. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys recap this week's films they have reviewed in the pun-happy styles of America's favorite TV critic and mustache-owner, Gene Shalit.
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Ep. 219: Fix a Summer Movie, Asia Argento's Woes, and Many Meh Movies
09/06/2018
Ep. 219: Fix a Summer Movie, Asia Argento's Woes, and Many Meh Movies
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are looking back on the summer movie season with an aim toward correcting several movies that could have used a little help to improve. It's another edition of Fix a Summer Movie. Along the way the guys sweat it out and conclude another summer season of movie watching and podcasting. Available on iTunes. Episode 219 includes: -Asia Argento gets into a #MeToo problem of her own. -Did you hear that Neil Armstrong is now a commie? The latest on conservative pundit faux controversies. -It's a medley of meh movies: "Puzzle," "Operation Finale," "The Little Stranger." -The new "Puppet Master" movie is so bad and insulting to fans that it makes Ben absolutely furious. -This Week's Pitch -- Fix a Summer Movie! -The guys make suggestions to better films such as "A Quiet Place," "Deadpool 2," "Hereditary," "Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom," "Tag," "The Meg," and "The Happytime Murders."
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What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- Puppets Behaving Badly (Happytime Murders, Meet the Feebles, Let My Puppets Come)
08/26/2018
What the Hell Did We Just Watch? -- Puppets Behaving Badly (Happytime Murders, Meet the Feebles, Let My Puppets Come)
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are taking a retrospective of puppets behaving badly in cinema, starting with the new puppet cop comedy "Happytime Murders" co-starring human Melissa McCarthy. After the guys discuss Peter Jackson's notorious "Meet the Feebles," a movie neither of them have watched since high school that does not age well, and then finally on the 1970s pornographic entry, "Let My Puppets Come," about puppets getting into the action. But is a single one of these films actually good beyond the novelty? Available on iTunes.
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Ep. 218: Sharks, Crazy Asians, and the new Popular Oscar TM
08/23/2018
Ep. 218: Sharks, Crazy Asians, and the new Popular Oscar TM
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are fresh from their 48 film fest showing (you can watch their film "Christmas Steve" here) and are catching up with the closing of the summer movie season with a big movie about big sharks and a big movie about big representation. The guys pitch shark movies in honor of "The Meg" and play another round of their favorite, and only, game, So Shalit Be. Along the way they'll discuss the unsung praise of Dan Castelenetta, Movie Pass, whether an Oscar category will stifle mainstream films or give them better representation, the near fatal fight over who should play Aretha Franklin in a movie, the merits of plot over atmosphere, and Ben's new podcast, "Head Cannon." Available on iTunes. Episode 218 includes: -The next Academy Awards will be introducing the category of... Best Popular Movie. Discuss. -Is Paramount letting "Star Trek" die as a current film franchise? -Ben is bored to death by "Eighth Grade" and intrigued by "Miseducation of Cameron Post," and the guys discuss the defining traits of coming-of-age movies. -The 90s rom-com is reborn with "Crazy Rich Asians" and thanks to representation feels fresh again. -"The Meg" is a fun shark movie that gave Nate enough to enjoy and left Ben wanting a little more bite. -This Week's Pitch -- Sharks! -Ben pitches an octopus with shark heads for arms, Hitler shark, a vigilante pledging vengeance against sharks, and microscopic sharks injected inside the president! -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys recap the movies they discussed this week but through the lends of pun-happy film critic, Gene Shalit.
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Ep. 217: BlackkKlansman, race, and the Rise and Fall of Move Pass
08/11/2018
Ep. 217: BlackkKlansman, race, and the Rise and Fall of Move Pass
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are back from making another 48 hour film festival entry and can finally talk about a great new movie, Spike Lee's strange-but-true "BlackkKlansman." The guys pitch movies about minority races, race itself, and racial oppression, and then they conclude the episode by playing another game of everyone's favorite pun-laden film critic, So Shalit Be. Available on iTunes. Episode 217 includes: -Come gather ye children to hear the tale, the tale of Movie Pass and foolhardy venture capitalists. -Ben pimps his new solo podcast, "Head Cannon." -Who knew Bo Burnham could be so sincere on behalf of eighth grade girls everywhere? -"BlackkKlansman" is Spike Lee's best movie in decades. -This Week's Pitch -- Race/Race Relations! -Nate pitches a "Babel"-like tale of multiple points of view from immigrants, minorities, and people dramatically affected by Trump policies. -Ben pitches a varied look at a Trayvon Martin-style tragedy, white America trying to flee to Mexico but foiled by a wall, the life of an Asian guy with a goatee who everyone assumes is a kung-fu master, and a vigilante superhero in an urban neighborhood. -This Week's Game -- So Shalit Be! -The guys attempt to form Gene Shalit-worthy puns blurbs for each of the movies they talked about on the episode.
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Ep 216: James Gunn Fired, Mission: Impossible 6, Skyscraper, and Comicon trailers
07/24/2018
Ep 216: James Gunn Fired, Mission: Impossible 6, Skyscraper, and Comicon trailers
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are picking up the pieces in the wake of some stunning news from Disney, namely the firing of writer/director James Gunn from the billion-dollar franchise he helped bring to their door. The guys discuss new Comicon trailers making their debut and briefly pitch where Gunn and his franchise may go next. Along the way there is also discussion over Gene Shalit's bathroom habits, the moon's response to man leaving behind astronaut excrement, the danger of right-wing trolls being rewarded, a fine year for ketchup, how far is too far with satire, French ignorance, and just how reliably wonderful Tom Cruise is when he's going all-out in an action vehicle. Available on iTunes. Episode 216 includes: -James Gunn fired by Disney for tweets he already apologized for and they knew about two movies ago. -The guys respond to new trailers revealed at Comicon, including "Godzilla: King of the Monsters," "Aquaman," "Shazam!," "Fantastic Beasts 2," and "Battle Angel Alita." -"Skyscraper" doesn't quite reach its intended heights; "Sorry to Bother You" goes a little too far in its final act"; "Three Identical Strangers" deserves to be seen. -"Mission: Impossible 6' is the best in the series and a pure adrenaline rush of action glory. -This Week's Pitch -- What's Next for James Gunn/Guardians of the Galaxy? -The guys discuss what projects James Gunn might be well suited for and who might be a replacement director for "Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 3."
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Ep. 215: TV Pilot Graveyard III (Tales of Frankenstein, Mr.Stitch, Stick Around)
07/16/2018
Ep. 215: TV Pilot Graveyard III (Tales of Frankenstein, Mr.Stitch, Stick Around)
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" are once again looking at failed TV pilots of old, this time with all Frankenstein-related pilots. It's another fascinating look at an alternate universe of TV that might have been. Remarkably, most of the shows are actually pretty acceptable and in some cases present promise that would never be fulfilled. Stick around indeed. Available on iTunes. Episode 215 includes: -The 1958 "Tales of Frankenstein" was meant to be an anthology horror series by Hammer. -Writer/director Roger Avary's "Mr. Stitch" 1995 Sci-Fi Channel pilot has just enough intriguing elements that Ben and Nate openly wish they could write it how it should be. -Dean Koontz's modern 2004 "Frankenstein" with Parker Posey... could be good but we'll never know (it's probably not). -Instead, the guys watch Andy Kaufman's 1977 pre-"Taxi" pilot "Stick Around" where he's a robot butler in the future and... and it's kinda great.
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Ep. 214: Ant-Man, buuuuuugs, Purge Trump Style vs. Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood
07/09/2018
Ep. 214: Ant-Man, buuuuuugs, Purge Trump Style vs. Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood
The "Dirty Sons of Pitches" have been beset by bugs, both in real life and at the movies. They're back and in honor of "Ant-Man and the Wasp" the guys are pitching movies related to bugs and insects. Along the way they talk about some very specific masculine fears, the nature of film commerce as a Lovecraftian monster, the surge of social significance the "Purge" movies have undergone, the appeal of mob movies, and whether all actors will be replaced with de-aged versions of themselves in the future. Available on iTunes Episode 214 includes: -R.I.P. Steve Ditko, Harlan Ellison, Ed Schultz -Is ScarJo in another "-washing" casting controversy? -Has "The Purge" gotten more political and more relevant in the age of Trump? You bet your ass it has. -Nate has seen the 0% on RT film "Gotti," and the worst thing, by far, is Pitbull's musical score. -"Ant-Man and the Wasp" is light-hearted comic fun and about what you'd want from it. -This Week's Pitch -- Buuuuuuuugs! -Ben pitches a Poe-styled thriller with a killer villainous worm, and an invading plague of bugs and the soldiers designed to eliminate them. -Nate pitches robot honey bees taking over and a home invasion thriller where one family must face off against a swarm of highly intelligent bugs.
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