The Connected Life
The Connected Life is a thought-provoking conversation about all the beautiful and messy ups and downs of life. Join Life Consultants Justin & Abi Stumvoll as they share vulnerable stories and practical wisdom that will lead you on a journey of connecting with yourself, others, and the world right in front of you. Their authentic, no-BS style will make you laugh, challenge you to dig deep, face your fears, and inspire you to love yourself and others more.
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360: A Guide to Expressing Your Emotions - Greatest Hits
11/24/2025
360: A Guide to Expressing Your Emotions - Greatest Hits
Most of us were never taught how to feel emotions—let alone how to express them in a way that feels safe for us and the people we love. From family dynamics to gender norms to childhood survival strategies, our emotional patterns were shaped long before we had words to describe them. In this episode, Justin and Abi dive into one of the most common relationship struggles: how we respond to emotions—both our own and others’. They explore the battle between “too emotional” and “not emotional enough,” sharing personal stories that reveal just how often those extremes are shaped by past pain. They also break down what’s really happening in these moments—threat responses, nervous system dysregulation, and internalized judgments—and show what it looks like to feel without becoming consumed. Whether you’ve ever been shut down for having big feelings or felt overwhelmed by someone else’s, this conversation will help you understand where those reactions come from and how to move toward emotional safety—for you and the people you care about. You won’t want to miss this episode—it might just shift how you see emotional connection altogether. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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359: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 1 - Greatest Hits
11/17/2025
359: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 1 - Greatest Hits
Most of us were never taught how to share pain in a way that brings connection. We were taught to explode, shut down, or stay silent—and those patterns don’t just disappear when we get into relationships. In this episode, Justin and Abi explore the messy ways they both used to express pain—and the chaos it created in their marriage. From nonverbal shutdowns to emotional overwhelm and assumptions that turned into judgments, they explain how unspoken pain builds walls and leaves both people feeling powerless. You’ll hear how their childhoods shaped their reactions, how misreading each other’s signals led to bigger disconnects, and what it took to begin rewiring those patterns. If you’ve ever been told you’re “too much” when you try to share your feelings—or you find yourself constantly shutting down instead of opening up—this episode will help you understand why. This is part one of a two-part series—don’t miss it. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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358: Toxic Empathy Vs Healthy Empathy - Greatest Hits
11/10/2025
358: Toxic Empathy Vs Healthy Empathy - Greatest Hits
Empathy can be one of the most destructive forces to connection—or one of the most powerful. Without it, relationships become cold and judgmental. But too much of it, without boundaries, and we lose ourselves trying to carry everyone else’s pain. So how do we find that middle ground? In this episode, Justin and Abi unpack what healthy empathy looks like, and what happens when it gets twisted into judgment or codependency. They share raw and personal stories from their own marriage—navigating chronic illness, financial stress, different upbringings, and PTSD—to show how empathy helped them heal long-standing patterns of resentment, disconnection, and pain. You’ll learn the difference between cognitive and affective empathy, how boundaries make empathy safer, and why being “too empathetic” can actually be a sign of unprocessed trauma. If you’ve ever struggled with being too empathetic, not empathetic enough, or confused about what empathy should look like in healthy relationships, this conversation is a game-changer. Don’t miss out! You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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357: What to Do When Your Partner Won’t Change - Greatest Hits
11/03/2025
357: What to Do When Your Partner Won’t Change - Greatest Hits
Nothing is more frustrating than feeling stuck in a relationship where your partner refuses to change. Maybe you’ve had the same conversation a hundred times, but nothing ever shifts. Maybe they acknowledge the problem but don’t take action. Or worse—maybe they don’t even see an issue at all. In this episode, Justin and Abi dive into what to do when you’re hitting a wall with your partner. They unpack the emotional toll of waiting for change, the difference between healthy patience and self-abandonment, and how to navigate the tension between acceptance and advocating for your needs. They also explore what true relational growth looks like—and why sometimes, the most powerful change you can make starts with yourself. If you’ve ever felt exhausted from trying to get your partner to evolve, this conversation will give you clarity, empowerment, and a new perspective on what’s actually in your control. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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356: When Intuition Opens the Door
10/27/2025
356: When Intuition Opens the Door
Following your intuition can feel confusing. Sometimes it sounds like fear, sometimes like desire, and sometimes like silence when you need it most. But when you learn to tune into that deeper voice, it can become one of the most life-giving guides you have. In this episode, Justin and Abi share how a forced pause in their first year of marriage exposed all the fears, survival patterns, and limiting beliefs they had been running from—and how listening to their inner voice slowly transformed their lives. They talk candidly about panic, PTSD, and financial stress, as well as the practices that helped them reconnect to their authentic dreams, from vision boards and declarations to redefining what “productivity” really means. If you’ve ever felt stuck, disconnected from your desires, or afraid to trust yourself, this conversation will help you clear the noise and start following the voice that knows the way forward. Don’t miss out! You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE! Also get your hands on The Tree of Life, an allegorical novel by Justin Stumvoll on Amazon now:
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355: How I Started Trusting Good Things
10/20/2025
355: How I Started Trusting Good Things
We’ve all felt it—the pit in your stomach that says the good can’t last, or the ache that whispers the pain will never end. Living braced for impact robs us of the very joy and resilience we’re longing for. In this episode, Justin and Abi get personal about financial fears, health crises, PTSD, and the cycles of marriage that tested their ability to trust goodness. They share how childhood pain shaped their anxiety about loss, and what helped them shift from sabotage and foreboding to presence and freedom. From bite-sized safety practices to the science of post-traumatic growth, they unpack how to expand your capacity for joy, let go of false control, and anchor your well-being in something deeper than circumstances. If you’ve ever feared the other shoe will drop—or felt stuck in a season that won’t end—this conversation will remind you: you can make it through, and you will be okay. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE! Also get your hands on The Tree of Life, an allegorical novel by Justin Stumvoll on Amazon now:
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354: What Chronic Sickness is REALLY Like
10/13/2025
354: What Chronic Sickness is REALLY Like
Chronic sickness can make you feel like you’ve lost yourself and that you’re letting everyone else down too. It impacts more than just your body; it reshapes your identity, your relationships, and your sense of hope. In this episode, Justin and Abi get personal about their journeys with long-term illness, the pressure to push through, and the silent grief of not being who you used to be. They unpack how sickness affects connection, the loneliness of being in survival mode, and the power of regulating your nervous system to support healing. Whether you're the one who’s sick or you love someone who is, this conversation will help you feel seen and remind you that your worth isn’t tied to your capacity. There is hope, and it might look different than you expected. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE! Also get your hands on The Tree of Life, an allegorical novel by Justin Stumvoll on Amazon now:
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353: The Key to Relational Resilience
10/06/2025
353: The Key to Relational Resilience
Shame is one of the most powerful forces in relationships and one of the least recognized. It hides behind defensiveness, blame, denial, and emotional shutdowns. It keeps us from hearing each other, owning our impact, and creating real repair. But what if we could build shame resilience and become great at relationships? In this episode, Justin and Abi get personal about the ways shame shaped their marriage—and what finally helped them break the cycle. They unpack why most people confuse shame with guilt, how shame can masquerade as moral failure, and why separating identity from behavior is essential for connection. From psychoeducation to spiritual perspective, they share what helped them heal. Whether you collapse when someone’s upset with you, or go on the offense to avoid feeling wrong, this conversation will help you clarify what’s happening and build the courage to show up with more ownership and compassion. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE! Also get your hands on The Tree of Life, an allegorical novel by Justin Stumvoll on Amazon now:
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352: The Expectation Hangover
09/29/2025
352: The Expectation Hangover
Whether it’s a birthday, anniversary, holiday, or vacation—we often attach so much meaning and pressure to these moments that they end up feeling more stressful than special. But what if it doesn’t have to be that way? In this episode, Justin and Abi get personal about how their own celebrations have stirred up unexpected grief, unmet expectations, and even old trauma. They unpack why we tend to expect too much from big life events and share what it actually takes to enjoy them—mess and all. From rethinking holiday traditions to letting go of fantasy-filled expectations, this conversation is filled with real talk, laughs, and practical ways to feel more grounded in life’s most emotionally charged moments. If you’ve ever felt let down by an event that was “supposed to be” magical, this episode is for you. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE! Also get your hands on The Tree of Life, an allegorical novel by Justin Stumvoll on Amazon now:
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351: The Missing Piece to Trauma Healing
09/22/2025
351: The Missing Piece to Trauma Healing
Many of us can talk logically about our feelings and for years replay the same stories in an effort to make sense of the pain, yet never truly finding healing. But what if the secret to repair has been hiding in our bodies all along? In this episode, Justin and Abi get personal about their journeys with somatic counseling and what it looked like to reconnect with their bodies after years of dissociation, trauma, and anxiety. They share how completing “unfinished” instinctual responses, learning to say no without guilt, and noticing small physical cues transformed the way they handle conflict, boundaries, and experience healing. If you’ve ever felt stuck in your head, struggled to overcome pain, or been blindsided by triggers, this conversation is just what you’re looking for. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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350: Is Therapy a Scam?
09/15/2025
350: Is Therapy a Scam?
In a modern world with more access to therapy than ever before, the increase in emotional health seems to be accompanied by people who are more fragile and incapable than ever before. Which begs the question: Is therapy a scam? And if not, with so many modalities out there, what is the right path for you? In this episode, Justin and Abi get personal about the moments therapy helped and the moments it missed the mark. They unpack why some counseling models fall short, what actually brings lasting healing, and how to find a therapist who’s a good fit for you. From emotional release to nervous system safety, reparative experiences to real empowerment, they break down the most important things to look for—and what to avoid. Whether you’re new to therapy or wondering if it’s time to find someone else, this conversation will help you trust your gut and advocate for what you need. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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349: Is Emotional Health Your Religion?
09/08/2025
349: Is Emotional Health Your Religion?
In this episode, Justin and Abi explore how emotional health, once rooted in compassion, can begin to mirror the rigid structures of religion. They unpack how judgment, superiority, and performative belonging often hijack tools meant for connection and healing. With honesty and humor, they reflect on how emotional health can lead us toward love and humility, yet sometimes becomes a weapon of shame and exclusion. Through personal stories and cultural insight, they invite listeners to ask: Am I using emotional tools to connect, or to separate? This conversation is a call back to compassion, nuance, and the kind of boundaries that don’t require someone else to be “bad” for us to feel safe. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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348: How to Get What You Want
09/01/2025
348: How to Get What You Want
Most relationship conflict isn’t about the issue at hand—it’s about whose anxiety gets cared for. Whether it’s parenting, money, cleaning, or how often you see friends, couples often end up in a tug-of-war, each fighting for relief. But what if the goal wasn’t winning… but finding a third option where you both get what you need? In this episode, Justin and Abi dive deep into the art of healthy negotiation. They unpack why so many of us default to passivity, demands, or self-abandonment—and how childhood experiences shape the way we advocate for our wants and needs. Through real-life stories and playful banter, they offer practical ways to replace power struggles with curiosity, co-creation, and emotional win-wins. If you’ve ever felt stuck in resentment, misunderstood in your relationship, or unsure how to get your needs met without conflict—this episode will give you language, hope, and a way forward. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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347: Why Success Nearly Broke Me
08/25/2025
347: Why Success Nearly Broke Me
When life feels overwhelming, it’s easy to reach for anything that helps us escape. For some, it’s alcohol or substances. For others, it’s overworking, scrolling, conflict, or control. The ways we cope are endless and often keep us from fully living. But what if instead of coping, life was more about what you choose to experience? In this episode, Justin and Abi are joined by their close friend and owner of The Adventure Challenge Bryant Ellis. In this powerful conversation, Bryant candidly shares how his success nearly broke him. He also discusses how his own journey led him from disconnection and destructive coping to a life marked by presence, honesty, and emotional responsibility. Together, they unpack what it means to stop numbing and start engaging with life—especially the parts we’d rather avoid. This episode is for anyone who’s ready to stop running and start returning to themselves. It'll help you recognize your patterns—and offer a hopeful path toward living with more intention, connection, and peace. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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346: When to Walk Away
08/18/2025
346: When to Walk Away
Some relationships help you grow—and some slowly pull you away from who you really are. So how do you know when it’s time to walk away? In this episode, Justin and Abi unpack the key signs that a relationship may not be right for you—from emotional distress and mismatched values to unhealed patterns and behaviors that erode your sense of self. They explore the difference between growth pains and relational red flags, offering honest stories from their own past breakups and the lessons they learned along the way. Whether you tend to stay too long, leave too early, or feel stuck in confusion, this conversation will help you build clarity, self-respect, and the courage to choose relationships that align with your values. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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345: When to Lock it Down
08/11/2025
345: When to Lock it Down
Choosing who to commit to isn’t just about attraction or chemistry—it’s about alignment in values, emotional health, and the ability to grow together. But what are the signs that it's time to lock it down? In this episode, Justin and Abi explore the essential markers of a thriving relationship—like emotional resilience, shared core values, the ability to repair after conflict, and a mutual commitment to growth. They share candid stories from their own relationship, offering a behind-the-scenes look at how they navigated misaligned expectations, shifting values, and the fears that come with commitment. If you’ve ever wondered whether your relationship has what it takes to last—or if you’re already married and want to strengthen your foundation—this conversation offers grounded, practical insight to help you evaluate, grow, and build something that can actually go the distance. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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344: The Cure to Relationship Drama
08/04/2025
344: The Cure to Relationship Drama
Most of us think we’re being observant when we’re really just making snap judgments. Our brains are designed to make quick assumptions—to keep us safe—but in relationships, those assumptions can quietly erode connection. But what if there was a way to promote safety and strengthen the relationship? In this episode, Justin and Abi unpack the power of curiosity as an antidote to relational drama, disconnection, and unspoken resentment. They explore how misunderstandings show up in marriages, friendships, workplaces—even parenting—and how easy it is to misread someone’s actions without ever checking in. Lastly they share how to implement curiosity in ways that are practical and easily doable no matter where you’re at in the process. With humor, honesty, and actionable wisdom, this episode will help you slow down, ask better questions, and create more safety and clarity in your connections. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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343: Become a Badass at Dating Pt. 2
07/28/2025
343: Become a Badass at Dating Pt. 2
Falling for someone is easy. But building something that actually lasts? That takes a whole different skill set. In part two of this series, Justin and Abi are joined by Bryant Ellis, the owner and CEO of The Adventure Challenge to take a plunge into what really matters after the first few dates. They explore the difference between red flags and nervous system triggers, how to recognize someone’s true character over time, and why curiosity is more important than snap judgment. They also unpack why so many people lose attraction in long-term relationships, the key mindset shifts that help relationships stay connected and alive, and how to navigate major differences in beliefs and values. If you’ve ever wondered how to spark love and keep the flame burning bright, this episode is just right for you! You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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342: Become a Badass at Dating Pt. 1
07/21/2025
342: Become a Badass at Dating Pt. 1
Many of us didn’t grow up learning how to date in a world of endless options and quick rejections, and those of us who have don't know a life without it. So it’s no wonder so many people feel disoriented, burned out, or discouraged by the dating scene. In this episode, Justin and Abi are joined by Bryant Ellis, owner and CEO of The Adventure Challenge, for a candid conversation about how online dating is changing our brains—and what it takes to stay grounded and authentic in the process. Together, they explore the hidden impact of dating app culture, how to stay human in the middle of it, and what to do with the fear of rejection that stops so many people from putting themselves out there. They also talk about how to approach dating with purpose instead of passivity, how to create a plan for emotional resilience, and how to build genuine connection in a culture of swiping. If you’ve ever wondered how to date with clarity and confidence (without losing your soul in the process), this episode is for you! You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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341: Staying Connected When Life Gets Stressful
07/14/2025
341: Staying Connected When Life Gets Stressful
We all hit seasons where life feels too big to carry—and often, our relationships take the hit. Stress doesn’t just affect our schedules; it hijacks our emotions, shrinks our capacity, and makes the people we love feel like the problem instead of the support. In this episode, Justin and Abi get personal about what stress has looked like in their relationship—from the chaos of remodeling their house to raising a new puppy. They share how stress brought out their worst patterns, triggered old wounds, and tested their ability to stay connected. Through real-life stories, they explore the impact of nervous system overwhelm and the small (but powerful) tools that helped them repair—again and again. If you’ve ever found yourself more reactive, more distant, or more overwhelmed than you want to be—or if you’re walking through a hard season and trying to stay connected—this episode is for you. You’ll walk away with language for what’s happening, practical steps for navigating stress together, and a reminder that hard seasons don’t have to break you—they can make you stronger. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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340: The Courage to Rethink Your Faith Pt. 2
07/07/2025
340: The Courage to Rethink Your Faith Pt. 2
Ever felt like asking hard questions about your faith might cost you everything? Like belonging, respect, or the relationships you once felt safest in? You’re not alone—and you’re not crazy for wrestling with it. In part two of this two part series, Justin and Abi continue their vulnerable conversation on deconstruction, diving into the emotional, relational, and spiritual fallout that often comes with challenging long-held beliefs. They unpack the difference between thoughtful deconstruction and reactionary destruction, how fear-based faith systems distort love, and why agenda-free connection is essential for healing and growth. From shifting value systems to the heartbreak of judgment and rejection, they share the real-life mess and beauty of evolving faith. Whether you’re rethinking your theology, questioning church culture, or navigating spiritual differences in your closest relationships, this episode will remind you: you’re not alone! You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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339: The Courage to Rethink Your Faith Pt. 1
06/30/2025
339: The Courage to Rethink Your Faith Pt. 1
At some point, many of us reach a moment when our beliefs no longer fit the reality we’re living. In this episode, Justin and Abi open up about their personal journeys through deconstruction—what it looked like, what it cost, and how it ultimately deepened their faith. They unpack why questioning your faith isn’t rebellion—it’s often a necessary part of maturing spiritually. Whether sparked by suffering, disillusionment, or simply the invitation to grow, deconstruction invites us to reassess what we believe and why. But it’s not just about tearing things down—it’s about making space for love, humility, and a more authentic connection with God. This conversation covers everything from the emotional upheaval of spiritual uncertainty to the gift of discovering God is bigger—and kinder—than we imagined. If you’ve ever felt like you don’t belong in the faith circles you once called home, or like asking questions makes you dangerous, this episode will help you feel seen. Deconstruction doesn’t mean losing faith. Sometimes it’s the most radical act of trust. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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338: Hormones: The Relationship Plot Twist
06/23/2025
338: Hormones: The Relationship Plot Twist
For many couples, navigating hormones can feel like walking through a minefield—unpredictable, emotionally charged, and often misunderstood. In this episode, Justin and Abi get personal about the challenges that come with PMS and shifting hormone cycles, offering a candid look into how it’s impacted their relationship over the years. From the physical discomfort to the emotional whiplash, Abi shares what it feels like to be in a hormone storm, while Justin gives voice to what it’s like to be on the receiving end. Together, they unpack misconceptions and dig into the power of validation, emotional ownership, and learning to communicate clearly—even when your nervous system is screaming. If you've ever felt crazy, dismissed, powerless, or unsure how to support your partner (or be supported), this episode is for you. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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337: Boundaries in Romance Pt. 2
06/16/2025
337: Boundaries in Romance Pt. 2
Setting boundaries can sound easy in theory. But trying to implement boundaries when your nervous system is fried and you're knee-deep in a conversation that’s going off the rails is a whole different story. At times it can feel impossible, but with the right tools, anyone can become good at it. In part two of this series, Justin and Abi get personal about the real-life messiness of learning to set and hold boundaries in romantic relationships. They talk about how unresolved childhood patterns shaped their earliest conflicts, how compassion without boundaries created chaos, and how learning to communicate needs around capacity, time, and space helped protect their connection. They also open up about the painful trial-and-error of figuring out what respect looks like in practice—not just in intention. If you've ever felt guilty for needing space, afraid to disappoint someone, or confused about how to set boundaries without creating more distance—this episode is for you. You won’t want to miss out. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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336: Boundaries in Romance Pt. 1
06/09/2025
336: Boundaries in Romance Pt. 1
For many of us, setting boundaries sounds reasonable outside of a romantic relationship. But what happens once you’re in deep—sharing a life, a home, and a bed? How do you navigate that kind of nearness? In part one of this two part series, Justin and Abi get personal about the power of boundaries inside a romantic relationship. They unpack the painful dance between autonomy and connection and share the chaos of their early years: the unspoken expectations, the fights about leaving parties, and the struggle to find themselves without losing each other. They also discuss how healthy boundaries preserve individuality while also becoming bridges to intimacy. If you want to create a thriving relationship where both parties feel secure to be fully themselves this series is just what you’re looking for. You won’t want to miss out. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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335: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 2
06/02/2025
335: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 2
Most of us never learned how to share pain in a way that brings us closer. Instead, we vent, shut down, accuse, or spiral into fear—hoping to feel understood but often creating more disconnection in the process. But it doesn’t have to be that way. In part two of this two-part series, Justin and Abi get practical about how to communicate pain in a way that invites connection. They unpack how all-or-nothing language, judgment, and emotional weaponization drive partners further apart. They also share vulnerable stories about the moments they got it wrong, the mindset shifts that changed everything, and the practical tools they now use to stay safe and soft—even in conflict. Lastly, they explore the power of self-awareness, inward communication, emotional nuance, and learning to narrate what’s really happening inside. If you’ve ever wanted to be heard without hurting someone, or feel safer sharing your emotions without shutting your partner down, this episode is a powerful guide for building the kind of trust and closeness you’ve always wanted. Don’t miss out! You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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334: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 1
05/26/2025
334: Overcoming Emotional Hurdles in a Relationship Pt. 1
Most of us were never taught how to share pain in a way that brings connection. We were taught to explode, shut down, or stay silent—and those patterns don’t just disappear when we get into relationships. In this episode, Justin and Abi explore the messy ways they both used to express pain—and the chaos it created in their marriage. From nonverbal shutdowns to emotional overwhelm and assumptions that turned into judgments, they explain how unspoken pain builds walls and leaves both people feeling powerless. You’ll hear how their childhoods shaped their reactions, how misreading each other’s signals led to bigger disconnects, and what it took to begin rewiring those patterns. If you’ve ever been told you’re “too much” when you try to share your feelings—or you find yourself constantly shutting down instead of opening up—this episode will help you understand why. This is part one of a two-part series—don’t miss it. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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333: Toxic Empathy Vs Healthy Empathy
05/19/2025
333: Toxic Empathy Vs Healthy Empathy
Empathy can be one of the most destructive forces to connection—or one of the most powerful. Without it, relationships become cold and judgmental. But too much of it, without boundaries, and we lose ourselves trying to carry everyone else’s pain. So how do we find that middle ground? In this episode, Justin and Abi unpack what healthy empathy looks like, and what happens when it gets twisted into judgment or codependency. They share raw and personal stories from their own marriage—navigating chronic illness, financial stress, different upbringings, and PTSD—to show how empathy helped them heal long-standing patterns of resentment, disconnection, and pain. You’ll learn the difference between cognitive and affective empathy, how boundaries make empathy safer, and why being “too empathetic” can actually be a sign of unprocessed trauma. If you’ve ever struggled with being too empathetic, not empathetic enough, or confused about what empathy should look like in healthy relationships, this conversation is a game-changer. Don’t miss out! You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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332: Why You Push Love Away
05/12/2025
332: Why You Push Love Away
We’ve all experienced those people that seem hot one minute and cold the next. Their mixed signals keep us wondering if they want to be besties or secretly planning our demise. The ups and downs of it can feel like a whiplashing rollercoaster. Solving the mystery can seem impossible, but we might just have your answers! In this episode, Justin and Abi are joined by their long-time friend and fellow Life Consultant, Rachel, to shine a light on disorganized attachment and its impact on relationships. As three people who’ve operated out of it, they unpack the origins of this pattern, the push-pull dynamics it creates, and the internal shame, fear, and powerlessness that come with it. From childhood trauma to emotional incest, they reflect on how early wounds shape our nervous systems—and what it takes for people with disorganized attachment to create stable connections. If you’ve ever felt like you’re too much, too broken, or too confusing to love… this episode is for you. There is a path toward clarity, healing, and secure connection—and it starts with understanding. Don’t miss out. You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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331: There's Hope for Your Relationship
05/05/2025
331: There's Hope for Your Relationship
Most of us don’t realize how much of our relationship pain is rooted in old stories—until those stories start playing out with the person we love most. It’s easy to blame our partners for the chaos in a relationship. But what if the truth is that we’re all just scared kids trapped in adult bodies, equally making messes as we search for safety? In this raw and redemptive episode, Justin and Abi share the full arc of their healing journey—from trauma bonding and codependency to finding internal safety, building emotional resilience, and learning to love without self-abandonment. They reflect on the missteps, the meltdowns, the moments that nearly broke them, and the powerful shifts that changed everything. Together, they paint a picture of what it means to stop trying to fix each other and start healing from the inside out. If you’ve ever felt stuck in patterns you don’t understand, judged yourself for how you react, or wondered if your relationship could really change—this episode is for you. Don’t miss out! You can WATCH us at Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!
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