We Have Concerns

Jeff Cannata and Anthony Carboni talk about the personal philosophical dread they see lurking inside innocuous everyday things. It's fun?

Welcome to the Jetpack Future 03/06/2015

Welcome to the Jetpack Future The New Zealand-based Martin Aircraft Company, now listed on the Australian stock exchange, is taking orders for the "world's first practical jetpack" and Jeff couldn't be more excited. But at $200,000 and at its current size, Anthony wonders if practical is really the right word. Also, the guys pitch their idea for Jetpack Rescue Squad and Anthony eats during the show, like a real professional. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3405621

Zen and the Art of Suicidal Maintenance 03/04/2015

Zen and the Art of Suicidal Maintenance The mummified remains of a Buddist monk have been discovered inside a statue that dates back over 1,000 years. Even more fascinating, studies reveal that the monk may have been self-mummified! Jeff and Anthony learn the excruciating, lengthy procedure once used to begin the embalming process while still alive, and wonder how enlightened one must be to attempt it. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3400900

Gross Income (Live from Nerdmelt) 03/02/2015

Gross Income (Live from Nerdmelt) A very special 100th episode of We Have Concerns, recorded in front of a live audience at the Nerdmelt Showroom in Los Angeles! Anthony and Jeff discuss the potential to sell your feces to science for use in treating patients with C diff. Donors can earn up to $13,000 per year for their excrement, but the standards are quite high for what constitutes sellable poop. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3396130

Why We Can't Have Mice Things 02/27/2015

Why We Can't Have Mice Things A new article on i09 describes animal behaviorist John Calhoun's quest to create the perfect mouse city, complete with abundant food, recreation, and even rodent apartments. Now referred to as the "Behavioral Sink", the utopian underground mouse habitat quickly degraded into an apocalypse, as the mice turned on one another and the bloated population died out. Anthony and Jeff can't help but see parallels to modern life, but also take a moment to consider what kind of guy spends his time attempting to perfect rat cities. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3389096

The No Deathbot Guarantee* 02/25/2015

The No Deathbot Guarantee* *not necessarily a guarantee /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3384342

Hale Hydra 02/23/2015

Hale Hydra The tiny organism known as the hydra is a half inch tube of jelly that inhabits fresh water all over the world, and it may well be functionally immortal. What does that mean? Anthony and Jeff try to make sense of a creature that can re-grow any part of itself and live for thousands of years - and imagine what that might be like for them. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3380076

Harvest Moon 02/20/2015

Harvest Moon Now that private companies are getting into space, the legalities of who can own celestial bodies comes into question. Specifically, a company called Bigelow Aerospace of Las Vegas wants to start selling inflatable habitats and property on the moon. Jeff and Anthony discuss the archaic treaties and laws that govern space ownership now, how it might change, and, of course, space pirates. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3375188

Spousal Recall 02/18/2015

Spousal Recall According to researchers at Macquarie University, couples in long-term relationships develop inter-connected memory systems. Each partner can remember only a few details, but together they piece together a more accurate whole, ostensibly off-loading parts of the job to the other. Anthony is intrigued by this, and what it means for replacing human interaction with machines, while Jeff wonders how much can just be attributed to laziness and coincidence. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3370529

Super Villain Face 02/16/2015

Super Villain Face A Venezuelan man had his face surgically altered to look like the Red Skull - Captain America's arch-nemesis in Marvel Comics. His nose was removed, his brow was enlarged, his skin was reddened, and even his eyeballs were tattooed black. Jeff thinks this is horrifying and has very bad implications for the man's state of mind. Anthony thinks we only get one shot at life and if this makes him happy, so be it. Both of them wonder what his kid must go through at school. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3366874

Running is for Dicks 02/13/2015

Running is for Dicks A new study shows that longer, fast-paced running sessions are just as bad for you as not running at all. How much exercise is genuinely good for you? And why do we always think more is better? /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3361456

Feels Like Forever 02/11/2015

Feels Like Forever What's more ethical: a life sentence in prison, or a drug that slows someone's perception of time to make them feel like they've spent 10 life sentences in a day? The question was asked last year by an Oxford University professor, but isn't the real question: if we could make a drug that let people do multiple lifetimes of thinking, why would we waste it on punishment instead of giving brilliant minds multiple lifetimes to solve human problems? Also what's it like to feel like you have an itch for 1,000 years? [editor's note: I came so close to calling this episode "ONE MILLION YEARS DUNGEON." WHERE MY LEMONGRAB FANS AT???] We Have Concerns is entirely listener supported! To keep us ad-free and get early episodes/bonus content, check out our Patreon: Hey! If you're enjoying the show, please take a moment to rate/review it on whatever service you use to listen. Here's the iTunes link: And here's the Stitcher link: Jeff on Twitter: Anthony on Twitter: Today's story was submitted by d3vourm3nt: (original essay: ) If you've seen a story you think belongs on the show, send it to [email protected] or leave it on the subreddit: /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3357020

Content with Content 02/09/2015

Content with Content Songwriter and youtube song-a-day artist Jonathan Mann has a new video online advocating for abolishing the term "Content Creator" for people who release things on the web. His position is that the term diminishes things designed to be distributed on the online, making them disposable. As individuals who have been described as "content creators" themselves, Anthony and Jeff discuss what this semantic change might mean, and why the desire to make quality creative endeavors on the web can be challenging. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3352442

Under the Sea 02/06/2015

Under the Sea A Japanese corporation wants to build the perfect underwater city of the future. That is both a real thing that's happening and also something that sounds like the plot of a nightmarish disaster movie. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3347094

Sit Stand Die (with Justin Robert Young) 02/04/2015

Sit Stand Die (with Justin Robert Young) How easily you can sit down and stand back up without using your hands can supposedly tell you how long you'll have to live. Jeff and Anthony are joined by Justin Robert Young and to try the test for themselves. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3341838

Inception Made Easy 02/02/2015

Inception Made Easy A new article describes just how easy it is to induce false memories in subjects. In fact, researchers were able to to convice patients that they had done horrible things, including assault with a deadly weapon, even when they had done noting fo the sort. Jeff is mystified about how quickly and easily the human brain is bamboozled. while Anthony is worried about what happens to the patients after this kind of dishonest study is complete. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3336658

The Assassin Defense 01/30/2015

The Assassin Defense NASCAR driver Kurt Busch is attempting to skirt allegations of domestic abuse by claiming that his girlfriend is a trained assassin. Jeff and Anthony proceed to mock any man who would physically assault his partner, and this man in particular for trying to avoid the issue in such an unbelieveable way. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3328686

Leaf it Alone 01/28/2015

Leaf it Alone The Australian Gympie-Gympie plant is the one of the most painfully poisonous in the world. People who have just rubbed up against it have gone mad with pain and tried to shoot off their own appendages with guns. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3324170

This Has All Happened Before 01/26/2015

This Has All Happened Before A 23 year-old man has been experiencing constant deja vu for seven years. What would it be like to have the feeling that everything you experienced has happened before? Powerful? Boring? Maddening? Powerful? Boring? Maddening? (see what I did there?) /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3321142

Fertility Pro Grammar 01/23/2015

Fertility Pro Grammar A new study finds that men who interact with women during the fertile period of their menstrual cycle tend to be more creative with their grammar. Anthony is impressed that human "peacocking" extends into speech patterns, while Jeff is just amazed that men can pick up on when women are most fertile. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3313429

We're Doomed. 01/21/2015

We're Doomed. Anthony found an article outlining the evidence that Earth is headed for its 6th great extinction event. Animals going extinct, global food tables imbalanced, resource scarcity, all lead up to a massive, worldwide catastrophe. He proceeds to use these facts to completely bum Jeff out. Listen as the show decends into total depression. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3309035

Two Birds With One Stoned 01/19/2015

Two Birds With One Stoned A group of researchers studying the effects of alcohol on speech decided to get some birds drunk. They divided a group of zebra finches - birds that learn and produce sounds similar to humans - into two groups. One sipped pure juice and the other a mixture of ethanol and juice. The results may shock you. Or not. Jeff and Anthony wonder how a group of researchers can spend grant money intoxicating birds, and why the fact that they slur their tweets is news to anyone. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3305889

Do What You Scan 01/16/2015

Do What You Scan A review led by a brain scientist at MIT found growing evidence that brain scans can predict future behaviors. If, one day, we are able to simply scan our brains to determine what kinds of activities we are more inclined to excel at, or problems we may encounter, will that lead to a healthier, more adaptive populace, or one shackled to in-born tendencies? Anthony and Jeff wrestle with that question, and try to predict what their own brain scans might indicate. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3299285

Lay Around on Your Astronaut 01/14/2015

Lay Around on Your Astronaut NASA is conducting a study about the long-term effects of weightlessness by asking applicants to stay completely horizontal for 70 days. In exchange for staying in bed and never standing up up, even to use the restroom or shower, NASA will pay test subjects $18,000, which works out to $1,200 per week or $257 per day. Anthony and Jeff wonder if they could stand it, and why NASA is holding out on horizontal showering technology for everyone. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3294404

Trial of the Planet of the Apes 01/12/2015

Trial of the Planet of the Apes A court in Argentina just upheld an animal rights group's request to have an orangutan appear in a court, saying it's illegal to hold 'non-human persons' in cages. Whoops, apes are people now. So is this a good thing? How smart are animals? What sort of rights should they have? Also: what kind of animal skin makes the best sneakers? /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3290802

The Bedbug Whisperer 01/09/2015

The Bedbug Whisperer In order to find a way to stop bedbugs, Regine Gries allowed herself to be bitten by them 180,000 times over a period of five years. Also, did you know that there's billionaire dinosaur porn? That's unrelated, but it doesn't mean we're not going to talk about it for 10 minutes or whatever. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3286118

Creeping Self Doubt 01/07/2015

Creeping Self Doubt What makes you you? Is the self somewhere in the body or the brain? If you downloaded your brain into a new body, would it be you? ANSWER ME (whatever 'me' is) /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3281357

Here There Be Dragons 01/05/2015

Here There Be Dragons A woman has a condition that makes her see dragons wherever she goes. Anthony and Jeff discuss perception and reality, and if we know what we see is real. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3276901

Laser Trains! 01/02/2015

Laser Trains! Every Autumn, falling leaves create hazards for the railways. Trains compress the debris by running over it, and the resulting surface becomes slick and unsafe. The solution? Lasers! One Dutch company has developed a way to blast the rails clean with high-tech lasers mounted to the front of the trains - which, of course, inspires Jeff and Anthony to pitch their new action/adventure trilogy, Laser Trains! /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3271509

Olfactory Produced 12/29/2014

Olfactory Produced Adrian David Cheok, the founder and director of the Mixed Reality Lab in Singapore, is attempting to record odors digitally, and recreate them without the use of chemicals. While a breakthrough in the area is still a long way off, the idea of digital smells has Jeff and Anthony wondering what this technology could possibly be used for, and, moreoever, what working in a place called the Mixed Reality Lab" might be like. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3264455

Dawn of the Planet of the Mice 12/26/2014

Dawn of the Planet of the Mice Scientists at the University of Rochester Medical Center in New York have successfully implanted human glial cells into the brains of mice to shocking result. Not only were the cells not rejected, but the human cells completely dominated the mouse brain cells. More incredibly, this led to mice which demonstrated a much higher capacity for memory and cognitive skill. Yep, Anthony and Jeff are thinking what you're thinking: the age of super-intelligent mice is upon us, and it is only a matter of time before we are all doomed. Listen as the guys bid farewell to the human race. /episode/index/show/wehaveconcerns/id/3261781

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