Ep. 181: "She's Always With Me" - Finding Peace In The Permanence Of Grief
Release Date: 01/29/2021
I Had A Brother Once - Adam Mansbach
Grief Out Loud
Just weeks before Adam Mansbach's wildly popular book, Go The F**K To Sleep, was published, his brother David died of suicide. In interview after interview promoting the book, Adam worried that someone would ask about his brother, would catch him off guard with a question about the grief that was raw and painful. Now, almost a decade later, Adam's newest book, I Had A Brother Once, is a memoir in verse about David's life, death, and the confusing aftermath when someone dies of suicide.
info_outline
Find The Helpers - Fred Guttenberg
Grief Out Loud
On Valentine's Day, 2018, Fred Guttenberg rushed his two children, Jaime and Jesse, off to school. He had no idea it would be the last time he saw Jaime, who was murdered later that day in the Parkland School shooting. Jaime was killed just a few months after Fred's brother Michael died of as a result of being exposed to toxic substances when he ran into the World Trade Center as a 911 first responder. In the aftermath of Jaime's death, Fred dedicated himself to saving lives through ending gun violence.
info_outline
Caregiving For A Parent - Priya Soni & The Caregiving Effect
Grief Out Loud
One day while driving between visiting her mom who had just had knee surgery and caring for her dad who had a progressive illness, Priya Soni wondered, "Where are the others?" By others, she meant the other adult children caregiving for parents and family members. Years later, this question would lead her to start The Caregiving Effect, an organization dedicated to bringing adult children caregivers together through stories, support, and mentoring.
info_outline
Grieving While Black - Breeshia Wade
Grief Out Loud
Breeshia Wade's new book, "Grieving While Black: An Anti-Racist Take on Oppression and Sorrow," puts grief into a wider context. The context of our relationships and the larger systems that shape who has access to resources like time, power, and the space to grieve. Breeshia is an author, end-of-life caregiver, and grief coach.
info_outline
Living With Loss Over A Lifetime - Hope Edelman & The AfterGrief
Grief Out Loud
How do we live with grief over the course of our lives? Hope Edelman, author of the groundbreaking book, Motherless Daughters, joins us again to talk about her newest book, The AfterGrief: Finding Your Way Along the Long Arc of Loss. The AfterGrief is what happens as we move out of the initial acute distress when someone dies and into a lifetime of learning to live with what that loss means for us.
info_outline
"Am I Even Safe In My Home?" Collective Grief In Communities With Marginalized Identities - Dr. Amber Nelson PsyD
Grief Out Loud
What is collective grief and how does it affect members of communities with marginalized identities? Dr. Amber Nelson, PsyD talks about both her professional and personal experiences with recognizing and supporting collective grief. Specifically the collective grief of bearing witness to the highly publicized murders of Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, Tony McDade, George Floyd, and the others who were killed this past year, many at the hands of the police.
info_outline
"I Can't Even Imagine" - Grieving Both Parents
Grief Out Loud
Mariyam was six when her father, Nurtay, died just before his 34th birthday. Now 20, Mariyam has experienced the deaths of four additional family members, including her mother, Bagitgul who died this past summer during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic in her home city in Kazakhstan. Now 20, Mariyam is figuring out how to live without both of her parents. We talk about the well-intentioned phrases like "I can't imagine what you're going through." "I could never survive" and how they feel to Mariyam.
info_outline
Widowish - Melissa Gould
Grief Out Loud
When you think of the word "widow" what image comes to mind? When author Melissa Gould's husband Joel died, she didn't fit what she imagined widows looked and acted like, even if she felt like one. This dissonance led her to come up with the term "Widowish" which is also the title of her new memoir. Widowish is the story of her husband Joel, their love, and how she and their daughter Sophie found ways to grieve the heartbreak of his death.
info_outline
The Indigenous Death Doula Mentorship Program - Chrystal Wàban Toop
Grief Out Loud
What does it mean to train to be a death doula for your community? Chrystal Wàban Toop is the founder of Blackbird Medicines and she joined us to talk about how her early experiences with grief grounded her in the the work she does as a life spectrum doula and her commitment to helping people reconnect with traditional knowledge and cultural practices to guide individual, family, and community transitions throughout the life span.
info_outline
Love Stories - A Griefy Valentine's Special
Grief Out Loud
Even if you don't really celebrate it, Valentine's Day can be rough when you're grieving. This year, we decided to bring you a compilation of love stories from listeners. Even though Valentine's Day is usually marketed as only about romantic love, this episode is about the love that exists in any connection. The idea for this episode came out of our conversation in episode 162 with Alesia Alexander, LCSW.
info_outlineMolly loves her life, but she didn't always feel that way. 18 years ago, on a rainy winter morning, Molly's life changed in an instant. The instant was her mom, who was also her best friend, dying of a heart attack while driving Molly to school. In the almost two decades since that day, Molly's worked hard to figure out what helps her feel healthy and grounded. Part of that work was realizing that grief is permanent - that it will continue to be part of who she is in this world. Now in her 30's Molly is discovering some peace in that permanence and in the knowing that her mom is always with her.
Please note, this episode contains topics that could be difficult or activating for some folks. We reference sexual assault, self-harm, and thoughts of suicide. If you decide to listen to this episode, do what you need to care for yourself – it might mean listening with a support person, or reaching out for help. If you want to skip these sections they are between 10:50-11:05 and 14:46-16:05. For additional support, you can call the National Suicide Prevention Line at 1-800-273-8255 or text Hello to 741741.