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59. How to Have a Happy Relationship

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

Release Date: 01/18/2022

241. Why It’s Hard To Initiate Intimacy —And What to Do About It show art 241. Why It’s Hard To Initiate Intimacy —And What to Do About It

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

You may think that after years of marriage, intimacy should get easier. After all, you know one another better than anyone, you have a routine. So why is it that for so many couples, sexual intimacy becomes more complicated with time? In this episode, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell explores why initiating sexual intimacy isn’t always intuitive—even in long-term relationships—and what you can do about it.  With a blend of psychological insight and real-world advice, Dr. Alexandra shares why rejection often creates distance and how to shift that pattern.  She introduces her five-week...

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240. How to Ask for Sex, Successfully show art 240. How to Ask for Sex, Successfully

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

Want to learn how to reliably ask for sex in a way that leads to connection instead of rejection? In this episode, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell explores this often-overlooked skill. She speaks directly to high-achieving men who struggle with initiating sex and offers a grounded, compassionate approach rooted in respect and emotional intimacy. Once you learn how to ask for sex well, it will transform your intimate life! Dr. Alexandra also shares details about her upcoming masterclass, where you'll learn clear, actionable ways to become more confident and successful in creating more closeness in...

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239. From Roommates to In Love again: How Coaching Transformed our Marriage – with Sebastian Smelko show art 239. From Roommates to In Love again: How Coaching Transformed our Marriage – with Sebastian Smelko

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

Feeling more like roommates than romantic partners? Learn how igniting your marriage through relationship coaching enhances everything in life. In this episode of the Intimate Marriage Podcast, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell interviews her client Sebastian Smelko—an accomplished lawyer, and a devoted husband and father—about how relationship coaching helped him and his wife turn their “roommate-style” marriage into a deeply connected partnership. Sebastian opens up about the mindset shifts, personal growth, and inner work that reignited his connection with his wife.  This is an honest,...

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238. How Power Couples Amplify Intimacy, with Sierra Sullivan & Rono Smith show art 238. How Power Couples Amplify Intimacy, with Sierra Sullivan & Rono Smith

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

Ever wonder what power couples do differently to thrive in life, and love?  In this episode of The Intimate Marriage podcast, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell speaks with Rono Smith and Sierra Sullivan—relationship coaches and visionary partners—about the secrets that transformed their business partnership into a deeply connected marriage. You’ll learn about their Epic Date Formula, how intimacy fuels purpose, and why committed couples are uniquely positioned for personal and professional growth.  Whether you’re building a life or a business together, this episode will help you unlock...

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237. My Top Tip to Access Deeper Intimacy show art 237. My Top Tip to Access Deeper Intimacy

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

What if deeper intimacy begins by facing the emotions you’ve been avoiding? In this episode of the Intimate Marriage Podcast, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell explores why avoiding emotional pain is blocking you from true pleasure. Discover how emotional numbness doesn’t just protect you from hurt—it also dulls your capacity for joy, passion, and connection.  Learn what it really means to embrace Uncompromising Intimacy and why the courage to feel it all is the key to a more vibrant, emotionally rich relationship.   This episode breaks down how: Avoiding pain also blocks pleasure and...

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236. Why Long-Term Marriages Require Reinvention show art 236. Why Long-Term Marriages Require Reinvention

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

Is it possible for a long-term marriage to become more fulfilling over time, better than the early years of dating and the newlywed phase? (We’re talking all aspects of marriage, including sex!) In this episode of The Intimate Marriage Podcast, Drs. Alexandra and Rodd Stockwell share their real-life journey through many phases of their marriage—from tending small children, to the early years of demanding careers, to a deeper, more connected relationship in midlife. Through honest communication and shared effort, they prove that lasting love is something you can cultivate and lean into, as...

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235. The Joy of Being Different: Playful, Intentional Love with Ling and Lamb show art 235. The Joy of Being Different: Playful, Intentional Love with Ling and Lamb

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

Intentional love isn’t just a goal—it’s a daily practice. Ling and Lamb, married content creators, beloved influencers, and authors, exemplify this through their blend of playful pranks and honest conversations.  In this episode of The Intimate Marriage Podcast, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell chats with Ling and Lamb about how they’ve mastered the art of blending humor, culture, extreme differences in upbringing, and deep connection. He grew up in Nigeria. She grew up in Connecticut. They have had to learn SO MUCH about one another in order to enjoy a vibrant intimate marriage. Now their...

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234. Reclaiming Presence: Tips to Deepen Intimacy in our Distracted World show art 234. Reclaiming Presence: Tips to Deepen Intimacy in our Distracted World

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

Craving more presence, passion, and real connection in your relationship? This episode is your gentle nudge to slow down, truly show up, and deepen intimacy in a meaningful way. In today’s episode, Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD dives into the issue of modern technology and other common distractions that pull us away from meaningful moments—and shares simple but powerful tools like deep breathing and emotional honesty to bring you back. Learn how being fully present can transform your intimate experiences and help you shift from feeling distracted to deeply connected.   In...

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233. Communicate With Your Spouse The Way You Communicate With AI–It Works! show art 233. Communicate With Your Spouse The Way You Communicate With AI–It Works!

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

AI offers surprising insights on a whole range of topics, and in this episode of The Intimate Marriage Podcast, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell describes how to use the principles of AI to improve communication and connection in your marriage.  Dr. Alexandra suggests that talking to your partner the way you need to in order to get the best results from AI—with clarity, specificity, and enough details to make the response useful–leads to clear, kind, honest, and connecting communication with your spouse. This results in more emotional closeness and erotic fulfillment.  This episode...

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232. Understand Libido Mismatch, Reignite Your Sexual Intimacy, with Susan Morgan Taylor, MA show art 232. Understand Libido Mismatch, Reignite Your Sexual Intimacy, with Susan Morgan Taylor, MA

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

What happens when a couple navigates libido mismatch—and how can they reconnect without feeling broken or disconnected? In this episode, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell talks with somatic sex therapist Susan Morgan Taylor, MA about overcoming desire differences and reigniting sexual intimacy in marriage. Drawing from her own suffering in a sexless marriage, Susan shares how emotional awareness, communication, and tension release can unlock deeper pleasure and connection. Whether you're navigating mismatched sex drives or simply craving more closeness, this conversation offers real, practical tools...

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More Episodes

Today’s episode of The Intimate Marriage Podcast marks the end of Season 1. As I look back at the richness of the season, it’s clear that there is no specific formula for a happy marriage. Each couple that I interviewed shared different things that contribute to their happiness. It’s a creative process unique to the individuals involved in terms of how they pursue and cultivate more joy, more pleasure, more connection, and more self-expression in their relationship. Listen as I highlight key moments from Season 1 and look ahead to Season 2! 

 

IN THIS EPISODE:

 

  • [01:15] The rules, or lack thereof, for happy and unhappy families
  • [04:06] Analogy: Teaching someone to fish and creating a fantastic marriage
  • [06:58] Key takeaways from Season 1 couples
  • [08:18] Taking risks in your relationship and tracking relationship goals 
  • [11:30] The connection between vulnerability and stress in marriage, and the importance of getting your children’s perspective about marriage and family
  • [16:08] Prioritizing your partner’s experience and finding success in life and marriage despite the chaos around your   
  • [19:42] Reflection and looking forward to Season 2

 

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

 

  • There is no specific formula for a happy and growing relationship. It's a creative process and unique to the individuals. It is intrinsically motivated and having a happy family is really a unique achievement. 
  • How we handle our money, especially in interacting with our spouse, is heavily influenced by emotional content that may not be completely clear to each other. It may feel obvious to us, but when you actually express it to your partner, it will ease miscommunication and frustration.
  • You can totally love and support your spouse without being interested in the things that they are interested in. 

 

Links Mentioned:

 

Read Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy”: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl

 

Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage

 

Follow Alexandra:

IG: @alexandra.stockwell.intimacy - https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/

 

FB: https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7

 

FB business: https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/