A Birth Mother's Perspective with Leslie Pate Mackinnon - Ep 75
Release Date: 01/09/2023
Unraveling Adoption
"So the piece that I most resonate with the Dialectical Behavior Therapy is it's one of the therapies that really understands this core feeling of feeling overwhelmed and like you don't want to be alive." - Sharon Stein McNamara EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Sharon Stein McNamara, a licensed psychologist and adoption-competent therapist. Sharon, an adoptee herself, shared her personal journey and the profound impact of adoption on her life, particularly during her adolescent years when she faced suicidal thoughts after a breakup....
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"I was one of these slight skeptics; I was like, well I've been breathing all my life, what can breathwork do for me?" -- Kellan Bacon Hear the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JKBNQJYFFZT18Z0XSMHHTH37 EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Kellan Bacon, a gender-expansive, transracial adoptee from China, who was adopted as an infant in 1998 and now resides in Cardiff, Wales. Kellan has recently launched a professional practice called Kai Ming Holistics, where they utilize breathwork and other embodied...
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"I think she had a deep ambivalence about me, knowing me, having a relationship with me from the very beginning." -- Susan Kiyo Ito Read the transcript of this episode here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Susan Kiyo Ito, a writing professor and author of the memoir I Would Meet You Anywhere. Susan's book, a culmination of 30 years of work, explores her journey as a biracial adoptee—half Japanese and half white—who was adopted at three and a half months old by Japanese American parents. We delved into Susan's origin story, her...
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"The most healing thing for me now has been the support of other adoptees." -- Dave Sanchez-Brown Read the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JJD8EF1R7VJ6J0V5GXRWXJY4 =============== EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Dave Sanchez-Brown, an adoptee who has bravely navigated the complexities of adoption, mental health struggles, and addiction. Dave shared his adoption story, which took a significant turn after he read Dani Shapiro's memoir Inheritance. Inspired, he decided to take a DNA test, leading...
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"It's a deep rooted fear of every adoptive parent that the parent will get rejected." - Dr. Asra Ali Read the transcript of this episode here: =============== Join Unraveling Adoption's in-person Adoption Healing Quest in Seal Beach, CA on February 8, 2025. More info and registration here: =============== EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Dr. Asra Ali, an adoptee from India whose adoption was facilitated by Mother Teresa. Dr. Asra shared her unique adoption story, highlighting the positive experiences she had growing up in a loving...
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"I use the language of supply and demand because this is a market-based system and it's uncomfortable for a lot of people, right? Because you're talking about a supply and demand of human beings." -- Gretchen Sisson Read the transcript here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Gretchen Sisson, the author of the acclaimed book Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood. Gretchen's work stems from a decade-long qualitative sociological study that delves into the experiences of relinquishing...
info_outlineWe are just switching our name from Safe Home Podcast to Unraveling Adoption, and this is the first full episode under our new name.
In this week’s episode, Beth Syverson chats with Leslie Pate Mackinnon, a licensed clinical social worker and an adoption activist for the past 30 years. Leslie is a seasoned and well-respected therapist in the adoption community. She is a nationally known trainer who travels across the country training therapists, agencies and child welfare workers about the psychological issues inherent in adoption and third-party reproduction. Following four decades of successful practice in Atlanta, Leslie and her husband relocated to Asheville, NC.
Leslie comes to this work by way of being a birthmother in the 1960s, the Baby Scoop Era. She understands adoption trauma deeply, both as a lived experience and as a therapist for all members in the adoption constellation - adoptees, birthparents, and adoptive parents. On Safe Home Podcast, we’ve had 8 episodes so far with adoptees, and 1 episode with another adoptive parent, but this is our first episode from the birth mom’s perspective, which is a super-critical piece of this puzzle.
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RESOURCES:
Leslie’s information:
- Website: https://lesliepatemackinnon.com/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063478541379
- Email: [email protected]
Other resource mentioned in this episode:
- Paul Sunderland’s speech about adoption & addiction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y3pX4C-mtiI
Other Resources:
- Other Parents Like Me - https://www.facebook.com/other.parents.like.me
- Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents of Addicted Teens: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/
- Find a Tele-Therapist: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/online-counseling
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Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson
Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao
Email questions or comments to [email protected]
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Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption
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TIME STAMPS:
2:00 All voices in adoption matter, and adoptees’ voices come first
3:16 Positive adoption language and listening to adult adoptees
6:35 Birth parents’ stories are often suppressed
8:16 Leslie’s birth parent experience #1
16:08 Adoptees and birth parents both get stuck in culture’s judgements about adoption
17:03 Coping with trauma with substances, the intersection between adoption and addiction
25:30 Adoptive parents talking openly with their children about their adoption
28:35 Leslie’s birth parent experience #2
33:25 Birth parents’ difficulties, then and now
39:00 The importance of family preservation, and Follow the Money
44:10 How Leslie & Beth are dealing with their past regrets