Unraveling Adoption
An intentional space to delve into adoption's complexities together, hosted by adoptive mom and adoptee advocate Beth Syverson. She and her young adult son began this podcast to help other families with adoptees struggling with addiction and mental health issues. It features the voices of a diverse array of adoptees and (occasionally) others with unique perspectives on adoption. Unraveling Adoption aims to elevate family preservation as the ideal, and amplify the voices of the traditionally marginalized.
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Abortion and Adoption: Insights from Sociological Research with Gretchen Sisson - Ep 175
12/16/2024
Abortion and Adoption: Insights from Sociological Research with Gretchen Sisson - Ep 175
"I use the language of supply and demand because this is a market-based system and it's uncomfortable for a lot of people, right? Because you're talking about a supply and demand of human beings." -- Gretchen Sisson Read the transcript here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Gretchen Sisson, the author of the acclaimed book Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood. Gretchen's work stems from a decade-long qualitative sociological study that delves into the experiences of relinquishing mothers and critiques the American adoption system. We discussed her journey into this research, which began while she was working with pregnant and parenting young people in Boston. Gretchen highlighted the stigmatization of young motherhood and the disconnect between societal narratives and the lived experiences of these women. Her research emphasizes the complexities of adoption, particularly how it intersects with issues of reproductive health and justice. Gretchen shared insights from her book, revealing that the majority of women who are denied access to abortion end up parenting their children, with only a small percentage choosing adoption. This led to a discussion about the implications of the recent Dobbs decision and its potential impact on adoption rates, as well as the troubling commodification of children within the adoption system. Throughout our conversation, we explored the reactions to her book from both the adoption community and the broader public. While many adoptees have resonated with her work, some adoptive parents have expressed defensiveness. We emphasized the importance of listening to adoptees and understanding the systemic issues surrounding adoption. Gretchen also touched on the need for better support systems for both adoptive parents and adoptees, advocating for a more nuanced understanding of family structures and the complexities of parenting. We concluded with a call to action for listeners to engage with the voices of adoptees and to consider the broader implications of adoption in our society. I encourage everyone to check out Gretchen's book, available in various formats, and to connect with her on social media. Thank you for joining us in this important conversation about adoption and its many layers. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Gretchenâs information: Pick up Gretchenâs amazing book Relinquished: Find Gretchen on Instagram: Other book mentioned in this episode: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:00:44 - Introducing Gretchen Sisson 00:01:41 - Gretchen's Research Journey 00:02:53 - Understanding Sociology 00:04:10 - Qualitative vs. Quantitative Research 00:05:36 - Impactful Stories in Adoption 00:06:40 - Response to Gretchen's Book 00:07:53 - Abortion and Adoption Dynamics 00:09:03 - Post-Dobbs Adoption Trends 00:10:55 - The Supply and Demand of Adoption 00:12:49 - Financial Aspects of Adoption 00:13:28 - Redirecting Adoption Funds 00:14:55 - Birth Mothers' Financial Needs 00:16:15 - Adoptee Perspectives on Adoption 00:17:37 - Adoptive Parents' Reactions 00:19:53 - Complexities of Adoption 00:22:06 - Supporting Adoptive Families 00:23:39 - Infertility and Adoption 00:25:23 - Broader Perspectives on Parenthood 00:27:39 - Listening to Adoptees 00:29:35 - Final Thoughts and Takeaways 00:31:09 - Where to Find Gretchen's Work 00:31:49 - Upcoming Events from Unraveling Adoption 00:33:05 - Closing Remarks
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Navigating Identity: A Korean Adoptee's Journey with Nathan Nowack - Ep 174
12/09/2024
Navigating Identity: A Korean Adoptee's Journey with Nathan Nowack - Ep 174
"I...sometimes I forget that I'm Asian unless I see myself in a mirror." -- Nathan Nowack Read the Transcript: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Nathan Nowack, a Korean adoptee, professional photographer, and co-host of The Janchi Show. Nathan shared his adoption story, having been adopted from Korea at just five and a half months old and raised in a predominantly white community in Oklahoma. He reflected on his childhood, noting the lack of cultural representation and the challenges of navigating his Asian identity in a world that often sees him as different. We discussed the complexities of transracial adoption, including the impact of his parents' approach to race and culture. Nathan emphasized the importance of understanding and acknowledging one's racial identity, especially in a society that often overlooks these nuances. He shared his experiences with microaggressions and the emotional toll they can take on adoptees, highlighting the need for greater awareness and sensitivity. Nathan also spoke about his involvement with KAAN (Korean American Adoptee Adoptive Family Network) and how connecting with other adoptees has been instrumental in his healing journey. He described the sense of community he found there and the importance of sharing diverse adoption stories, acknowledging that each experience is unique. As a father of three multiple-ethnicity children, Nathan is committed to helping them understand their cultural heritage. He shared how he incorporates Asian traditions and celebrations into their lives, ensuring they have a strong sense of identity. This conversation was rich with insights into the complexities of adoption, identity, and community. I hope listeners find Nathan's story as inspiring and enlightening as I did. Be sure to check out The Janchi Show and connect with Nathan on Instagram for more of his journey and perspectives. Thank you for joining us, and I look forward to our next episode! =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Nathanâs information: Find Nathan on Instagram: Check out Nathanâs Podcast: and https://www.instagram.com/janchishow/ Find out more about KAAN: and =============== =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of host Beth Syverson and guest Nathan Nowack. 00:01:26 - Nathan's Adoption Story Nathan shares his background as a Korean adoptee raised in a predominantly white environment. 00:02:50 - Cultural Representation in Upbringing Discussion on the lack of Asian cultural representation in Nathan's childhood. 00:03:50 - Transracial Adoption and Parental Awareness Nathan reflects on his adoptive parents' understanding of transracial adoption. 00:05:32 - The Melting Pot Mentality Exploration of the "colorblind" approach to race and its implications for Nathan. 00:06:52 - Microaggressions and Identity Nathan discusses experiences with microaggressions and their impact on his identity. 00:08:38 - Community and Connection The importance of finding community among other adoptees for support and understanding. 00:09:18 - Involvement with KAAN Nathan explains his role in the Korean American Adoptee Adoptive Family Network (KAAN). 00:10:56 - Upcoming KAAN Conference Details about the next KAAN conference and its themes. 00:11:41 - Healing Through Shared Stories How connecting with other adoptees aids in Nathan's healing journey. 00:12:30 - The Complexity of Adoption Stories Discussion on the varied experiences of adoptees and the ongoing nature of loss. 00:13:44 - Reunion with Biological Family Nathan shares his experience of reuniting with his biological siblings. 00:15:17 - Communication Challenges with Siblings The difficulties of connecting with his siblings due to language barriers. 00:16:37 - Sibling Trauma and Adoption Exploration of the trauma experienced by Nathan's siblings regarding his adoption. 00:17:45 - Parenting Mixed-Race Children Nathan discusses raising his children with awareness of their diverse heritage. 00:19:15 - Cultural Education for Children How Nathan incorporates Asian culture and representation into his children's lives. 00:20:37 - Food and Cultural Connection Nathan's love for food and how it connects him to his heritage and family. 00:21:50 - Living Through His Children Reflections on how Nathan experiences his own identity through his children's upbringing. 00:22:45 - Closing Thoughts and Resources Nathan expresses gratitude for the opportunity to share his story and offers ways to connect.
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Adoption Songs: Exploring the Complexities of Adoption Through Music with Lori Evans Ermi and Kate Ermi
12/02/2024
Adoption Songs: Exploring the Complexities of Adoption Through Music with Lori Evans Ermi and Kate Ermi
"I think now that we have this knowledge, then we can use our story to help create awareness." - Lori Evans Ermi Read the transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JDRMT4Z5RGJ6SD35WBFBT4PM EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of welcoming Lori Evans Ermi and her 17-year-old daughter, Kate Ermi, both of whom are adoptees and co-wrote their new book, Adoption Songs. Our conversation delved into the complexities of adoption from their unique perspectives, highlighting the emotional layers that come with their experiences. Lori shared her journey as a domestic adoptee from the baby scoop era, detailing her late discovery of her adoption at the age of eight and the trust issues that arose from that revelation. Despite having loving adoptive parents, she faced challenges in her identity and connection to her biological roots. Kate, on the other hand, has always known she was adopted and has navigated her own path of understanding her heritage, which was further illuminated through DNA testing. We discussed the creation of Adoption Songs, where each chapter is framed as a track, with contributors choosing songs that resonate with their adoption stories. The book aims to provide a broad perspective on adoption, acknowledging both the joys and the inherent losses that come with it. Lori emphasized the importance of music as a healing tool, and Kate shared her lifelong passion for music, which has been a source of comfort for her. Throughout our conversation, we touched on the significance of community and shared experiences among adoptees, as well as the need for more resources and support for young adults in the adoption community. Lori and Kate's commitment to raising awareness and fostering understanding about adoption's complexities is truly inspiring. I encourage listeners to check out their book and visit their website, adoptionsongs.org, for more information and resources. Additionally, I shared details about an upcoming event, Adoption Healing Quest, which will take place in February 2025, aimed at exploring various healing modalities within the adoption community. Thank you for joining us in this important conversation, and I hope you find the insights shared by Lori and Kate as enlightening as I did. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Lori and Kateâs information: Find their website with info about their book Adoption Songs: Other resource mentioned in this episode: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Welcome to Unraveling Adoption Introduction to the podcast and hosts, Beth, Lori, and Kate. 00:01:10 - Adoptee Stories: Lori's Journey Lori shares her adoption story, including her experiences and feelings about being adopted. 00:04:47 - Adoptee Stories: Kate's Journey Kate discusses her adoption experience and her understanding of her identity. 00:06:45 - The Complexity of Adoption Discussion on the layers of adoption and the importance of understanding different perspectives. 00:07:33 - Creating Adoption Songs Exploration of the book "Adoption Songs" and the involvement of both Lori and Kate in its creation. 00:10:43 - The Primal Wound Concept Introduction to the concept of The Primal Wound and its significance in adoption narratives. 00:11:45 - Future Plans for Adoption Songs Plans for a sequel to the book and the inclusion of more diverse perspectives. 00:12:38 - The Role of Music in Healing Discussion on how music plays a significant role in the lives of Lori and Kate. 00:14:40 - Untangling Our Roots Experience Kate shares her experience at the Untangling Our Roots event and the impact of hearing others' stories. 00:18:03 - Navigating Complex Emotions Lori and Kate discuss the complexities of their relationship and the duality of love and loss in adoption. 00:21:29 - Mainstream Adoption Narratives The importance of presenting adoption stories in a way that is accessible and relatable to a broader audience. 00:22:30 - Finding Resources and Support Information on where to find the book and additional resources related to adoption. 00:23:26 - Upcoming Events and Closing Thoughts Announcement of future events and a closing message of gratitude to listeners.
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The Male Adoptee Experience: Understanding Anger, Vulnerability, and Community with Tim Perdion - Ep 172
11/25/2024
The Male Adoptee Experience: Understanding Anger, Vulnerability, and Community with Tim Perdion - Ep 172
"I almost feel like there was a blueprint, and I was a character to fit into that blueprint." -- Tim Perdion Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the opportunity to speak with Tim Perdion, an adoptee from Ohio who has spent the last decade navigating his journey of self-discovery and healing. Tim shares his experience of being adopted shortly after birth and the feelings of not belonging that plagued him throughout his childhood. Despite growing up in a loving family, he struggled with anger and a sense of isolation, which led him to seek validation through sports and relationships. As a teenager, Tim turned to substances to cope with his internal struggles, leading to a reputation for overindulgence in high school. After facing personal crises in adulthood, including two divorces, he sought help at a trauma and addiction clinic, where he began to confront the deeper issues related to his adoption. Tim highlights the lack of focus on adoption-related trauma in traditional recovery settings and emphasizes the importance of vulnerability and community for male adoptees. He introduces the concept of the "orphaned heart," describing the emotional barriers adoptees build to protect themselves from feelings of abandonment and rejection. Tim encourages younger male adoptees to explore their inner worlds and seek support, reminding them that they are not alone in their struggles. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of the complexities of adoption, the significance of community, and the power of vulnerability. I hope Tim's story resonates with many and inspires others to seek understanding and connection in their own journeys. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Timâs information: Email Tim at Timâs Website: Find Tim on LinkedIn: Find Tim on Facebook: Find Tim on Instagram: Books mentioned in the episode: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier: Healing the Orphaned Heart: Renewal for the Misunderstood, the Abused, and Abandoned by Casey Treat: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:01:24 - Tim's Childhood and Adoption Experience 00:03:47 - Struggles with Identity and Belonging 00:06:26 - The Impact of Family Dynamics 00:08:56 - Substance Use and Coping Mechanisms 00:10:51 - Seeking Help and Treatment 00:12:08 - Understanding Adoption Trauma 00:14:20 - The Journey of Self-Discovery 00:16:02 - Finding Community and Connection 00:19:05 - The Importance of Sharing Stories 00:20:17 - Challenges for Male Adoptees 00:22:05 - The Role of Forgiveness in Healing 00:24:46 - Learning to Ask for Help 00:27:04 - Advice for Younger Male Adoptees 00:29:44 - Resources and Community Support 00:30:57 - Conclusion and Call to Action
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The Plants Are Calling for the Adoption Constellation with Mee Ok Icaro - Ep 171
11/18/2024
The Plants Are Calling for the Adoption Constellation with Mee Ok Icaro - Ep 171
"The plants are always turning everything upside down because our culture is upside down." -- Mee Ok Icaro EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I, Beth Syverson, welcome back Mee Ok Icaro, a previous guest who has shared her profound insights on adoption and healing through plant medicine. This episode is particularly special as we recorded as we prepared for an ayahuasca retreat in Costa Rica, where I participated in my first ceremony under Mee Okâs guidance. We begin by discussing our feelings as the retreat approaches. I express my excitement mixed with a hint of fear, acknowledging that this experience is far outside my comfort zone. Mee Ok shares her own anticipation and the unique challenges of leading a retreat for the first time, emphasizing the importance of focusing on personal healing rather than taking on the burdens of others. Mee Ok elaborates on the concept of leadership in the context of plant medicine, contrasting it with traditional views. She explains that true leadership often involves humility and a willingness to learn from others, rather than a desire for power or control. This perspective shifts the narrative around what it means to guide others in their healing journeys. As we delve deeper into the preparations for the retreat, we discuss the rigorous dieta we have both been following. This dieta involves strict dietary and behavioral restrictions designed to prepare our bodies and minds for the transformative experience ahead. I share my struggles with giving up my phone and certain foods items and the impact of reducing external stimuli on my mental clarity and emotional well-being. Mee Ok and I also touch on the broader implications of accessibility to plant medicine, particularly for marginalized communities. We discuss the challenges faced by individuals from lower-income backgrounds in accessing these healing modalities and the need for a more equitable approach as psychedelics become more mainstream. Throughout the episode, we reflect on the importance of integration and preparation in the healing process. I share my personal journey with ketamine treatment and how it has helped me move away from antidepressants, highlighting the significance of active engagement in one's healing journey rather than passively relying on substances. As we conclude, we express our excitement for the upcoming retreat and the potential for profound transformation. We plan to record a follow-up episode after the retreat to share our experiences and insights gained during this journey. Join us as we explore the complexities of adoption, healing, and the transformative power of plant medicine in this thought-provoking episode. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Mee Okâs information: Connect with Mee Ok through her website: Hear Mee Okâs previous Unraveling Adoption podcast episode, âAyahuasca for Transforming Trauma and Pain with Mee Ok Icaroâ: Hear Mee Ok and Leslie Pate Mackinnonâs previous Unraveling Adoption podcast episode âInsights from Plant Medicine for the Adoption Constellation with Mee Ok Icaro and Leslie Pate Mackinnonâ: Register for Mee Okâs next Adoptee-Only Medicine Circle here: Other resources mentioned in this episode: Soltara Healing Center (Costa Rica): \ Other Resources: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of hosts Beth Syverson and Mee Ok Icaro. 00:02:00 - Preparing for Ayahuasca Retreat Discussion about the upcoming ayahuasca retreat in Costa Rica and the preparation process. 00:03:30 - Emotional Readiness and Expectations Beth and Mee Ok share their feelings of excitement and fear as they approach the retreat. 00:05:30 - Redefining Leadership in Healing Spaces Mee Ok discusses her perspective on leadership and the importance of humility in guiding others. 00:09:00 - The Role of Ego in Leadership Exploration of how ego affects leadership and the qualities of a good leader. 00:12:00 - Accountability in Healing Environments Mee Ok emphasizes the need for accountability and trust in the retreat setting. 00:15:00 - The Importance of Preparation and Integration Discussion on the significance of preparation and integration in the healing process. 00:20:00 - Challenges of Accessibility in Psychedelic Healing Conversation about the barriers to accessing psychedelic treatments for various demographics. 00:23:00 - Personal Healing Journeys Beth shares her experiences with ketamine treatment and the importance of integration. 00:27:00 - The Process of the Dieta Mee Ok explains the dieta, its restrictions, and its role in preparing for the ayahuasca experience. 00:32:00 - Transformative Effects of Disconnecting Beth discusses the impact of reducing phone and media usage during the dieta. 00:35:00 - Commitment to Healing Work Mee Ok talks about the commitment required for serious healing and the importance of discipline. 00:40:00 - The Role of Tobacco in Healing Mee Ok shares her personal journey with tobacco and its significance in the healing process. 00:45:00 - Building Relationships with Plants and Healers Discussion on the importance of relationships with plants and healers in the dieta process. 00:49:00 - Conclusion and Future Intentions Wrap-up of the conversation and reflections on the journey ahead.
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Finding Empowerment through Sex Work as a Korean Adoptee with Kayla Tange - Ep 170
11/05/2024
Finding Empowerment through Sex Work as a Korean Adoptee with Kayla Tange - Ep 170
Finding Empowerment through Sex Work as a Korean Adoptee with Kayla Tange "I can be in my body, and in that moment, I feel safe." -- Kayla Tange EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Kayla Tange, a Korean adoptee raised by Japanese-American parents. She has navigated a unique and complex journey through life as an exotic dancer, performance artist, and sex worker. Kayla shared her adoption story, detailing her early life in an orphanage in Seoul before being adopted at six months old. We explored how her experiences with ADHD and autism influenced her career choices and her desire for connection. Kayla candidly discussed her entry into the world of sex work, revealing how it provided her with a sense of empowerment and control over her bodyâsomething she felt was taken from her during her adoption. Throughout our conversation, we touched on the themes of identity, belonging, and the emotional complexities that come with being an adoptee. Kayla's reflections on her work and the connections she forms with clients highlighted the often misunderstood aspects of sex work, challenging stereotypes and emphasizing the agency she feels in her choices. Kayla also read a powerful piece from her contribution to the anthology Whorephobia, which delves into her experiences and emotions surrounding her adoption and her work. Her insights offered a profound understanding of the intersections between adoption, identity, and the search for belonging. This episode is a deep dive into the complexities of adoption and the ways in which individuals navigate their identities and experiences. I encourage listeners to reflect on Kayla's story and the broader implications it has for understanding adoption and the diverse paths that adoptees may take. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Kaylaâs information: Email Kayla: Check out Kaylaâs Website: Follow Kayla on Instagram: Watch Kaylaâs amazing short film Dear Mother: Hereâs the anthology, Whorephobia, that includes Kaylaâs essay that she read on this episode: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of host Beth Syverson and her son Joey. 00:00:34 - Today's Topic: Sexuality and Sex Work Discussion on the focus of the episode regarding sexuality and sex work. 00:00:56 - Introducing Kayla Tange Introduction of guest Kayla Tange, her background as a Korean adoptee, and her work in the sex industry. 00:01:52 - Kayla's Adoption Story Kayla shares her adoption story, including her age at adoption and her upbringing. 00:02:32 - Early Interest in Performance Discussion on Kayla's early interest in dance and performance. 00:03:20 - Career Path and ADHD Diagnosis Kayla talks about her career journey and the impact of her ADHD and autism diagnosis. 00:04:49 - Transition to Sex Work Kayla explains how she transitioned into sex work and dancing. 00:05:59 - Job Satisfaction and Flexibility Discussion on the benefits of working as a dancer compared to retail jobs. 00:06:33 - ADHD and the Nature of the Job Exploration of how the job suited Kayla's ADHD tendencies. 00:08:06 - Connecting with Customers Kayla discusses the importance of connecting with customers and building relationships. 00:09:06 - Adoption Trauma and Connection Exploration of the link between adoption trauma and Kayla's need for connection. 00:10:25 - Empowerment through Sex Work Kayla shares her perspective on feeling empowered through her work. 00:12:17 - Commodification of Bodies Discussion on the commodification of bodies in adoption and sex work. 00:13:24 - Feelings of Displacement Kayla reflects on feelings of displacement related to her adoption. 00:14:01 - Experiences in Korea Kayla shares her experiences and feelings during her trips to Korea. 00:15:11 - Creating the Film "Dear Mother" Discussion on the process and impact of creating her film. 00:16:28 - The Power of Performance Kayla talks about the liberating aspects of performing. 00:17:56 - Family Dynamics and Support Kayla reflects on her adoptive family's support and concerns regarding her career. 00:19:13 - Community and Support in the Industry Discussion on the supportive community within the sex work industry. 00:20:12 - Advice to Her Younger Self Kayla shares what she would tell her 12-year-old self. 00:21:45 - Advice for Parents Kayla offers advice to parents about supporting their children's interests. 00:23:49 - Reading from Whorephobia Kayla reads a powerful piece from the anthology Whorephobia. 00:37:04 - Closing Thoughts and Future Plans Discussion on Kayla's ongoing work and future plans, along with closing remarks from Beth.
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From Ethiopia to America and Back Again: An Adopteeâs Fight for Justice with Mike Davis and Maureen McCauley - Ep 169
10/28/2024
From Ethiopia to America and Back Again: An Adopteeâs Fight for Justice with Mike Davis and Maureen McCauley - Ep 169
"I thought I'll go to the embassy and I'll clear this up. Yeah, that I was adopted legally and I was US citizen." -- Mike Davis READ THE TRANSCRIPT HERE: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Mike Davis, an intercountry adoptee whose story sheds light on the often-overlooked complexities of adoption, particularly regarding citizenship issues. Mike was adopted from Ethiopia at the age of eight by an African-American single father and grew up in the U.S. However, in the mid-1990s, he discovered that he was not a U.S. citizen, despite his father's efforts to complete the necessary adoption paperwork. In 2005, Mike was deported to Ethiopia, a country he barely remembered, where he faced immense challenges, including language barriers and a lack of support. He shared the harrowing details of his deportation, including being dropped off at the airport with only the clothes on his back and a small amount of money. Mike's story is a stark reminder of the potential pitfalls in the inter-country adoption process and the devastating impact it can have on families. Throughout our conversation, Mike emphasized the ongoing struggles he faces, including the inability to access benefits he contributed to while working in the U.S. and the emotional toll on his family, including his wife and children, who have also suffered due to his deportation. We were also joined by Maureen McCauley, an adoptive parent and advocate for Mike, who has been instrumental in raising awareness about his situation and has created a to assist with his legal and medical expenses. Together, we discussed the broader implications of Mike's story, including the urgent need for legislative change to protect the rights of all adoptees, particularly those who are at risk of deportation. This episode serves as a call to action for listeners to educate themselves about the complexities of adoption and to advocate for the rights of adoptees. We encourage all Americans to support the Adoptee Citizenship Act and to reach out to their Congressional representatives to help ensure that no adoptee has to endure the hardships that Mike has faced. Thank you for joining us in this important conversation. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Donate to Mikeâs GoFundMe: Read the book that Maureen edited and that includes Mike's essay, Lions Roaring Far From Home: An Anthology by Ethiopian Adoptees: Check out Maureen's blog, Light of Day Stories: Other resources mentioned in this episode: Adoptees for Justice: Adoptees United: Adoptee Citizenship Act: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Welcome to Unraveling Adoption Introduction of host Beth Syverson and her mission. 00:01:00 - Complexities of Adoption Overview of today's focus on inter-country adoption issues. 00:02:00 - Meet Mike Davis Introduction of guest Mike Davis and his background. 00:03:40 - Deportation Experience Mike recounts his deportation to Ethiopia. 00:05:30 - First Days in Ethiopia Mike's initial struggles upon arrival in Ethiopia. 00:07:00 - Citizenship Realization Discovery that Mike was not a U.S. citizen. 00:09:00 - Adoption Paperwork Issues Discussion on the confusion surrounding Mike's adoption documents. 00:10:30 - Legal Challenges Mike shares his legal battles to prove citizenship. 00:12:00 - Family Impact The emotional toll on Mike's family due to his deportation. 00:14:00 - Criminal Charge Consequences Mike discusses the events leading to his criminal charge. 00:16:30 - Legal Representation Struggles Challenges in finding effective legal help. 00:18:00 - Support from Maureen Introduction of Maureen and her advocacy for Mike. 00:20:00 - Adoptee Citizenship Act Explanation of the legislative efforts for adoptee citizenship. 00:22:00 - Broader Adoptee Issues Impact on other adoptees facing similar challenges. 00:24:00 - Call to Action Encouragement for listeners to support the cause. 00:26:00 - Final Thoughts from Mike Mike's reflections on the injustices faced by adoptees. 00:32:00 - Conclusion and Resources Wrap-up and information on how to get involved.
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Educating the Next Generation: Adoption Messages in Children's Books with Allison Olson - Ep 168
10/21/2024
Educating the Next Generation: Adoption Messages in Children's Books with Allison Olson - Ep 168
"I can read a book and tell you if it's written by an adoptee, written by an adoptive parent or written by somebody who's just a famous author and someone told him to write about adoption and they know nothing about it." -- Allison Olson EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Allison Olson, an adoptee and adoptive parent who has made significant contributions to children's literature on adoption. We explored her personal adoption story, which began in 1979 when she was adopted as a baby in a closed adoption, and how her experiences shaped her perspective as both an adoptee and a parent to an adopted child. Allison shared her insights on the evolution of adoption practices, particularly the shift from closed to open adoptions, and the importance of representation in children's books. She expressed her frustration with the common narratives found in many adoption-themed picture books, which often portray adoptees as "lucky" rather than "loved." This inspired her to write her own books, including Surrounded by Love: An Open Adoption Story and Learning About My Friend's Adoption, aimed at educating children about adoption in a balanced and loving way. We discussed the challenges adoptees face in educating their peers about their experiences and the need for more resources that accurately reflect the complexities of adoption. Allison emphasized the importance of normalizing conversations about adoption and providing children with the tools to understand and embrace their identities. Listeners will find Allison's work invaluable, as it not only addresses the needs of adopted children but also serves as a resource for their friends and families. I encourage everyone to check out her books and share this episode to help spread awareness about the importance of thoughtful representation in children's literature. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Allisonâs information: Check out Allisonâs website for her own books plus her lists of childrenâs books: Find Allisonâs books on Amazon: Allisonâs book lists: âAn Adopteeâs Top 14 Childrenâs Adoption Booksâ: âChildrenâs Adoption Books Written by Adopteesâ: Find Allison on Social Media: Instagram: Facebook: TikTok: Other Resources: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of host Beth Syverson and guest Allison Olson. 00:01:00 - Allison's Adoption Story Allison shares her personal adoption journey and her experiences as both an adoptee and an adoptive parent. 00:03:00 - Closed vs. Open Adoption Discussion on the differences between closed and open adoptions, including definitions and implications. 00:07:00 - The Impact of Openness in Adoption Allison reflects on the benefits of open adoption and her experiences with her daughter's adoption. 00:10:00 - Challenges in Children's Adoption Books Allison discusses her experiences with children's picture books about adoption and the messages they convey. 00:14:00 - The Need for Balanced Representation Exploration of the importance of balanced narratives in adoption literature, highlighting both love and struggle. 00:17:00 - Creating Surrounded by Love Allison explains her motivation for writing her first book and the intentional choices made in its creation. 00:20:00 - Learning About My Friend's Adoption Introduction to Allison's second book aimed at educating non-adopted children about adoption. 00:24:00 - The Responsibility of Educating Others Discussion on the burden adoptees face in educating their peers and the importance of literature in this process. 00:28:00 - Resources and Closing Thoughts Allison shares her website and resources for finding adoption-related books.
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Creative Paths to Healing Childhood Trauma with Jonathan Moon - Ep 167
10/14/2024
Creative Paths to Healing Childhood Trauma with Jonathan Moon - Ep 167
âI'm telling all the skeptics who may be listening, just go in there with an open mind because you're not going to lose anything. You have so much more to gain.â - Jonathan Moon EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Jonathan Moon, an adopted person who has navigated the complexities of relinquishment and adoption trauma. Jonathan's journey began in Korea, where he faced significant challenges as a child, including living on the streets and experiencing significant instability. He was adopted to the U.S. at the age of nine and has recently embarked on a path of healing and self-discovery. Jonathan shared his unique story, including his reunion with his grandmother through a Korean TV show and the emotional complexities surrounding his birth family. He discussed the struggles he faced growing up, including the impact of his father's alcoholism and abuse, and how these experiences shaped his identity. Throughout our conversation, Jonathan emphasized the importance of community and connection among adoptees, highlighting how sharing similar experiences can foster understanding and healing. He also opened up about his journey toward healing, which has included acting classes, therapy, and alternative healing practices like myofascial release and ketamine therapy. Jonathan's story is a testament to resilience and the ongoing process of healing from trauma. He is currently working on an artistic film titled Voice of Waters, which aims to share his experiences and insights with a broader audience. I encourage listeners to check out his website and support his work. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Jonathanâs information: Find out about Jonathan's upcoming film, Voice of Waters, and sign up for his website here: Other Resource Mentioned in the episode: The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.: Miofascial release: Ketamine therapy: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of host Beth Syverson and guest Jonathan Moon. 00:01:14 - Meeting at Untangling Our Roots Discussion about the adoption conference where Beth and Jonathan met. 00:02:51 - Jonathan's Early Life Jonathan shares his background, including his birth parents and early memories. 00:05:48 - Life with His Grandmother Description of Jonathan's childhood living with his maternal grandmother. 00:08:00 - Transition to Living with His Father Jonathan recounts the move to live with his birth father and half-brothers. 00:09:20 - Challenges at His Father's Home Jonathan discusses the difficulties he faced living with his father and brothers. 00:12:52 - Living on the Streets Jonathan shares his experiences of running away and living on the streets. 00:15:04 - Adoption Process Jonathan describes how he was adopted to the U.S. and his initial thoughts. 00:18:34 - First Days in America Jonathan reflects on his arrival in the U.S. and the adjustment to his new life. 00:20:34 - Family Dynamics Discussion about Jonathan's adoptive family and his place within it. 00:22:05 - Struggles with Trauma Jonathan opens up about the impact of his past traumas on his life. 00:23:24 - Military Experience Jonathan talks about his time in the military and coping mechanisms. 00:24:18 - Reunion with Birth Family Jonathan shares the story of his reunion with his grandmother and birth mother. 00:27:33 - Confronting His Birth Father Discussion about Jonathan's decision to not reunite with his birth father. 00:28:55 - Journey to Healing Jonathan discusses his healing journey and the steps he has taken. 00:29:24 - Acting and Self-Discovery How acting classes helped Jonathan confront his trauma. 00:31:20 - Therapy and Healing Modalities Jonathan shares his experiences with therapy and alternative healing methods. 00:33:22 - Myofascial Release Therapy Description of myofascial therapy and its impact on Jonathan's healing. 00:35:16 - Ketamine Therapy Jonathan discusses his experiences with ketamine therapy and its transformative effects. 00:37:43 - Profound Experiences with Ketamine Jonathan recounts a significant session where he felt a deep connection with his family. 00:40:31 - Exploring Other Healing Practices Jonathan talks about trying Reiki and other energy work. 00:41:34 - Creating Voice of Waters Discussion about Jonathan's film project and its significance in his healing journey. 00:42:42 - Closing Thoughts and Resources Beth encourages listeners to explore Jonathan's work and upcoming events related to adoption.
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The Realities of Open Adoption with a Mother-Daughter Duo with Linda and Belle Sexton - Ep 166
10/07/2024
The Realities of Open Adoption with a Mother-Daughter Duo with Linda and Belle Sexton - Ep 166
"I think my mom does a great job addressing this in the book, but open adoption is not without its challenges." - Belle Sexton Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the honor of speaking with Linda R. Sexton, an adoptive mom and author, and her 25-year-old daughter, Belle. This marks our first mother-daughter duo on the podcast, offering a unique perspective on open adoption. Linda R. Sexton is an author, speaker and blogger. She is an adoptive mom of two children, both in open arrangements, and is the author of the award-winning book, . The story is told with frank honesty about the grief and joys of open adoption. Linda includes the voices of all four birth parents, birth grandmothers and her adopted children. She has seen first hand how an adopted child can benefit greatly by knowing and connecting with birth parents and other members of their biological family. Visit her website to learn more. In our episode, Belle shared her adoption story, highlighting her early life in Texas and the open adoption plan created by her young birth parents. She emphasized the importance of knowing her birth family, which helped her navigate her identity as an adoptee. Linda reflected on the emotional journey of waiting for Belle's birth and the profound moment when Belle's birth mother handed her over in a hospital ceremony. We discussed the complexities of open adoption, including Belle's feelings of adoptee's guilt and the importance of maintaining connections with birth families. Both emphasized that while open adoption can be challenging, it is a better option when compared to closed adoptions. For those of you who enjoyed this podcast and wish to know more, The Branches We Cherish: An Open Adoption Memoir is available on Amazon or can be purchased from your favorite bookseller. There are several families involved in the story and most of the names have been changed to protect privacy. (Since you now know Belle, she is Sofie in the book.) This episode beautifully illustrates the complexities and joys of adoption, and I hope it resonates with those on similar journeys. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Linda & Belleâs information: Pick up Lindaâs book The Branches We Cherish: An Open Adoption Memoir: Or pick it up at an independent bookstore if you prefer: Explore Lindaâs website: If you want to reach Belle, email Linda through her website, and she will get your message to Belle Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of hosts and guests. 00:01:26 - Belle's Adoption Story Belle shares her background and experiences with her birth parents. 00:03:15 - Terminology in Adoption Discussion on the vocabulary used to describe adoptive and birth parents. 00:04:16 - Linda's Perspective on the Adoption Process Linda reflects on the emotional journey of adopting Belle. 00:06:06 - The Ceremony of Relinquishment Linda describes the emotional moment of receiving Belle from her birth mother. 00:08:09 - Memories and Keepsakes Belle shares about the memorabilia from her birth family. 00:10:12 - Challenges in Open Adoption Discussion on the complexities and challenges faced in open adoption. 00:12:25 - Understanding Birth Parents' Choices Belle reflects on her birth parents' decision-making process. 00:15:46 - Adoptee's Guilt Belle discusses feelings of guilt and the impact of her adoption experience. 00:19:03 - Navigating Relationships with Birth Parents Belle talks about her relationship dynamics with her birth parents. 00:20:52 - The Impact of Writing the Memoir Linda and Belle discuss the process and effects of writing the memoir together. 00:26:02 - Final Thoughts on Open Adoption Belle and Linda share their concluding thoughts on the benefits and challenges of open adoption. 00:28:49 - Connecting with the Audience Linda provides information on how to reach her and access her resources.
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The Intersection of Politics and Adoption with Mark H. - Ep 165
09/30/2024
The Intersection of Politics and Adoption with Mark H. - Ep 165
"The way that fascism triumphs is if everyone goes silent and becomes quiescent." - Mark H. EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I, Beth Syverson, welcome Mark, a transracial adoptee from Korea and a passionate advocate for adoption-related issues. Together, we delve into the often-overlooked intersection of politics and adoption, particularly in the context of the upcoming U.S. presidential election. As an adoptive mom of a 20-year-old son, Joey, who is navigating his own path, I feel a deep responsibility to address the complexities surrounding adoption and how they relate to broader societal issues. This election is particularly significant, as it touches on critical topics such as racial justice, women's reproductive rights, LGBTQ+ rights, and the preservation of our democratic systems. With Joey preparing to vote for the first time, I am acutely aware of the stakes involved and the long-term impact our choices will have on future generations. Mark shares his unique perspective as a transracial adoptee and a gay man, highlighting the challenges he faced growing up in a predominantly white environment. He reflects on the societal norms of his youth, where discussing politics was often taboo, and emphasizes the importance of speaking out in today's climate. Mark articulates the existential nature of this election, particularly for marginalized communities, and the need for individuals to engage in political discourse. Throughout our conversation, we explore the implications of having a woman of color, Kamala Harris, as a presidential candidate. While Mark expresses excitement about her candidacy, he also addresses the racism and misogyny she faces, which resonates deeply with his own experiences of being âotherâed. We discuss how the political landscape has shifted, particularly within the Republican Party, and the urgent need for individuals to recognize and confront systemic racism. Mark and I emphasize the importance of activism, not just in the traditional sense of protests and demonstrations, but in everyday conversations with friends, family, and neighbors. We encourage listeners to engage with those around them, especially in swing states, to ensure that their voices are heard and that they participate in the electoral process. As we wrap up the episode, I invite listeners to reflect on their own roles in advocating for change and to consider how their political choices impact the lives of those in the adoption community and beyond. We urge everyone to vote, to educate themselves, and to have open discussions about the critical issues at stake in this election. This episode serves as a call to action for all of us to be brave, to stand up for what we believe in, and to work towards a more equitable society for everyone, especially those affected by adoption. Thank you for joining us in this important conversation. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: If youâd like to connect with Mark H., send him an email through me at . Heâs staying anonymous in this episode in order to not jeopardize his job. Respond to this episode on Unraveling Adoptionâs page on , , , or . Other resource mentioned in this episode: White Fragility: Why It's So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism by Robin J. DiAngelo: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:01:00 - The Importance of Voting Beth discusses the significance of the upcoming presidential election and its impact on adoption-related issues. 00:02:30 - Introducing Mark Mark, a transracial adoptee, joins the conversation to discuss the intersection of politics and adoption. 00:03:00 - Mark's Background and Perspective Mark shares his experiences as a transracial adoptee and the importance of speaking out in the current political climate. 00:06:00 - The Fog of Whiteness Mark discusses the challenges of growing up in a predominantly white environment and the implications for transracial adoptees. 00:08:30 - Representation in Politics Mark expresses his feelings about having a woman of color as a presidential candidate and the challenges she faces. 00:10:30 - Racism and Misogyny in Politics Discussion on the racism and misogyny directed at Kamala Harris and its impact on marginalized communities. 00:12:30 - Understanding Systemic Racism Mark explains the difference between individual acts of racism and systemic racism in society. 00:14:30 - The Role of White Allies The importance of white individuals engaging with and understanding issues of race and privilege. 00:16:00 - The Stakes of the Election Mark emphasizes the critical nature of the upcoming election and the need for active participation. 00:18:00 - Mobilizing for Change Discussion on the responsibility of individuals to educate and mobilize others in their communities. 00:20:00 - The Importance of Conversations Mark highlights the power of personal conversations in advocating for change and understanding. 00:22:00 - Adoption and Political Interests Exploration of how adoption intersects with political issues, particularly for families of color. 00:24:00 - Activism in Everyday Life Mark discusses how activism can take many forms, including simple conversations with friends and family. 00:26:00 - The Power of Individual Votes The significance of each vote in local and national elections and the moral obligation to participate. 00:28:00 - Conclusion and Call to Action Beth and Mark encourage listeners to engage in the political process and advocate for marginalized communities.
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Unpacking Adoption Trauma: Insights from an Adoptive Parent with Stacey Uhrig - Ep 164
09/23/2024
Unpacking Adoption Trauma: Insights from an Adoptive Parent with Stacey Uhrig - Ep 164
âThey [our kids] can't be more regulated than you are. They can only be as regulated as the least regulated person in the house.â - Stacey Uhrig EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Stacey Uhrig, an adoptive parent and certified trauma recovery coach. Stacey shared her journey into adoption, which began after her own struggles with infertility. She emphasized the emotional complexities and challenges that come with adoption, particularly the trauma that both adoptees and adoptive parents may face. Stacey discussed her experiences raising two boys adopted from Korea and the significant insights she gained about trauma, attachment, and the impact of early disruptions in a child's life. We explored the importance of understanding the emotional wounds that children may carry from their past experiences, even before they come into our homes. Throughout our conversation, we highlighted the need for adoptive parents to do their own emotional work in order to better support their children. Stacey shared valuable resources, including her own ebook, What is Trauma Really?, and her podcast, Flip Your Mindset, both of which aim to educate and empower those affected by adoption. We also touched on the misconceptions surrounding trauma and the importance of approaching parenting with empathy and an open mind. This episode serves as a reminder that understanding adoption trauma is crucial for creating a nurturing environment for our children. I hope this conversation resonates with adoptive parents and encourages them to seek knowledge and support in their parenting journey. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Staceyâs contact information: Look up Staceyâs website: Hear Staceyâs podcast: Find Stacey on Instagram: Download Staceysâ FREE e-book What Is Trauma Really?: Other resources mentioned in this episode: Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency: A Comprehensive Guide to Promoting Understanding and Healing In Adoption, Foster Care, Kinship Families and Third Party Reproduction by Sharon Roszia and Allison Davis Maxon: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction Welcome to Unraveling Adoption with host Beth Cyberson and guest Stacey Uhrig. 00:01:00 - Stacey's Adoption Journey Stacey shares her path to adoption through infertility and decision-making. 00:03:30 - Challenges in Adoption Discussion on the challenges faced, including school difficulties and a brain injury. 00:06:00 - Understanding Adoption Trauma Stacey reflects on the concept of the primal wound and its implications. 00:08:30 - Lack of Resources The struggle to find support and resources for adoptive parents. 00:10:30 - Importance of Education The need for better preparation for adoptive parents regarding challenges. 00:12:30 - Personal Growth How learning about trauma provided Stacey with grace in her parenting. 00:15:00 - Impact of Early Experiences Effects of early attachment disruptions on adopted children. 00:18:00 - Parental Responsibility The role of adoptive parents in understanding and healing trauma. 00:21:00 - Coaching Approach Stacey explains her coaching methods for adoptive parents. 00:24:00 - Nature of Trauma Exploration of trauma's meaning and effects on children. 00:27:00 - Self-Reflection for Parents Encouragement for parents to do their own emotional work. 00:30:00 - Work with Adoptees Stacey discusses her methods for working with adoptees. 00:33:00 - Conclusion and Resources Wrap-up and sharing of Stacey's website and podcast for further resources.
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Personal Trust Communities in Adoption with Mike Thorne - Ep 163
09/16/2024
Personal Trust Communities in Adoption with Mike Thorne - Ep 163
"When I was nine years old,...my parents just looked at each other and looked back at me and said, Michael, we just want to tell you that we love you very much and that you're adopted." -- Mike Thorne =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: ============== EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Mike Thorne, an adoptee and community leader. Mike shared his journey of discovering his adoption at age nine, which profoundly impacted his self-worth. We discussed the importance of building personal trust communitiesâsupportive networks that provide emotional and intellectual guidance, especially for those navigating the complexities of adoption. Mike also reflected on his time as a board member of the National Council for Adoption (NCFA), emphasizing the need for diverse perspectives in adoption discussions. He encouraged listeners to seek out their own support systems and focus on their dreams rather than being held back by past experiences. This episode serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of connection and understanding within the adoption community. I hope you find inspiration in Mike's insights and encourage you to explore his TEDx Talk and memoir for further understanding. Thank you for joining us, and I look forward to continuing this important conversation in future episodes. RESOURCES: Mike Thorneâs information: Watch Mikeâs TEDx Talk: Read Mikeâs memoir Hustle With Heart: Unlocking Self-Worth Through Personal Trust Communities: Other resources mentioned in this episode: NCFA - National Council for Adoption: Simon Bennâs organization & podcast Thriving Adoptees: Other resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of host Beth Syverson and her son Joey. 00:01:00 - Mike Thorne's Adoption Story Mike shares his vivid experience of discovering he was adopted at the age of nine. 00:02:30 - Navigating Adoption Conversations Discussion on the lack of resources and conversations around adoption during Mike's childhood. 00:03:55 - Understanding Late Discovery Adoptees Exploration of the term "late discovery adoptee" and its implications. 00:05:00 - Age-Appropriate Communication in Adoption The importance of age-appropriate discussions about adoption with children. 00:06:00 - Adoptee Perspectives in Education Mike discusses his daughter's experiences as a teacher and the impact of sharing adoption stories. 00:07:00 - Mike's Leadership in Adoption Advocacy Mike's involvement with the National Council for Adoption and the importance of adoptee voices. 00:08:30 - Adoptee Panel at NCFA Conference Insights from the adoptee panel at the NCFA conference and its impact on attendees. 00:10:00 - The Need for Male Voices in Adoption The significance of including male and non-binary perspectives in the adoption conversation. 00:11:00 - Evolution of NCFA Discussion on the changes within the National Council for Adoption and its leadership. 00:12:00 - Mike's Future Goals in Maine Mike shares his plans to connect with local organizations in Maine to support adoption and foster care. 00:13:00 - Corporate Leadership Background Mike discusses his corporate experience and how it informs his approach to leadership. 00:15:00 - The Importance of Personal Trust Communities Introduction to the concept of personal trust communities and their role in personal growth. 00:18:00 - Overcoming Perfectionism in Adoptees Mike reflects on the perfectionism often experienced by adoptees and its roots. 00:20:00 - Building Supportive Networks The importance of finding the right people to support you in various aspects of life. 00:22:00 - Adoptee Spaces and Support The value of finding supportive spaces for adoptees to share their experiences. 00:24:00 - Challenges for Adoptive Parents Discussion on the struggles adoptive parents face in understanding and supporting their children. 00:26:00 - Collaboration Among Organizations The need for collaboration among nonprofits to improve outcomes for children in the adoption system. 00:28:00 - Mike's Vision for the Future Mike shares his aspirations for making a difference in the adoption community. 00:30:00 - Encouragement for Listeners Mike encourages listeners to focus on their dreams and find supportive communities. 00:32:00 - Conclusion and Resources Wrap-up of the episode, including resources for listeners to connect with Mike and Beth.
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The Importance of Adoptee-Led Initiatives with Jessica M. Luciere - Ep 162
09/09/2024
The Importance of Adoptee-Led Initiatives with Jessica M. Luciere - Ep 162
"I tell every adopted person that I meet that their story changes my own story. And it's the truth. It is the absolute truth." - Jessica M. Luciere In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson interviews Jessica M. Luciere, an inter-country, interracial adoptee from Colombia who works at Spence Chapin, a nonprofit adoption agency. Jessica shares her personal adoption story and highlights the importance of adoptee-led initiatives in the adoption community. She discusses the programming she has created at Spence Chapin, including Voices of Adoption for adoptees over 18 and Teen Voices of Adoption for younger adoptees. Jessica emphasizes the significance of community and support for adoptees and adoptive parents, encouraging them to be open, vulnerable, and willing to learn. She also shares her experience of reuniting with her birth family in Colombia and offers advice for adoptees seeking connection with others. Beth and Jessica stress the importance of listening to adoptees' voices and elevating their perspectives in the adoption conversation. Overall, the episode highlights the value of community, support, and understanding in the adoption journey. =============== đPick up our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Jessicaâs information: Spence Chapinâs website: Voices of Adoption - support groups for adults and teen adoptees: Jessica's email: Jessicaâs Instagram: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption and Jessica 00:05:30 - Importance of Adoptee-Led Initiatives 00:10:00 - Training and Support for Adoptive Parents 00:13:00 - Growing Up as a Transracial Adoptee 00:15:30 - Reuniting with Birth Family 00:17:00 - Advice for Adoptees Seeking Connection 00:19:00 - Advice for Adoptive Parents 00:20:30 - Resources and Programming at Spence Chapin 00:22:00 - Conclusion and Call to Action
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Shedding Light on Children of Priests with Brendan Watkins - Ep 161
09/02/2024
Shedding Light on Children of Priests with Brendan Watkins - Ep 161
"The Church, of course, is doing everything it can to silence victims." - Brendan Watkins EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, the host, Beth Syverson, interviews Brendan Watkins, an Australian adoptee who shares his emotional journey of discovering his origin story filled with religious intrigue. Brendan found out that his birth mother became pregnant in the 1950s and relinquished him for adoption, and later became a nun. He then discovered that his birth father was a Catholic priest. Brendan's memoir, Tell No One, sheds light on the challenges faced by children of priests and nuns. The episode delves into the complexities of adoption, the impact of secrecy and shame, and the need for awareness and support for individuals affected by such circumstances. Brendan emphasizes the importance of mental health support and seeking legal assistance for those in similar situations. The episode highlights the ongoing struggle for justice and recognition faced by children of priests and nuns, urging listeners to educate themselves and support those affected by these issues. =============== đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Brendan Watkinâs information: Check out Brendanâs website: Grab Brendanâs memoir Tell No One: Other resources mentioned in this episode: SNAP (Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests): Coping International (Children of Priests International): Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== TIME STAMPS: Introduction to Unraveling Adoption: 00:00:02-00:00:34 Brendan's Early Childhood and Adoption Revelation: 00:01:36-00:03:08 Discovering Birth Mother's Identity: 00:03:28-00:05:14 Revealing Birth Father's Identity: 00:06:34-00:08:53 Insights into Relationship Between Birth Parents: 00:09:19-00:09:51 Discussion on Celibacy and Wealth in the Church: 00:10:32-00:12:53 Impact of NDAs and Confidentiality Agreements: 00:16:15-00:19:01 Support and Justice for Children of Priests and Nuns: 00:20:11-00:22:56 Reflections on the Church's Actions and Victims: 00:23:20-00:26:04 Resources and Conclusion: 00:26:54-00:28:30
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Homeschooling Complexities for Adopted Children with Rae (Adoptee Reclaimed) - Ep 160
08/26/2024
Homeschooling Complexities for Adopted Children with Rae (Adoptee Reclaimed) - Ep 160
"I never learned the word stress until I was 14 years old. And I can guarantee you I was very stressed well before the age of 14." -- Rae =============== đ Order our book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson interviews Rae, whose handle is Adoptee Reclaimed. Rae discusses how being homeschooled from kindergarten through high school in a conservative family led to feelings of isolation and pressure to conform. She highlights the challenges adoptees particularly face in homeschooling, such as the heightened power dynamic between adoptive parents and adoptees, the lack of diverse perspectives in education, and the impact on social skills development. Rae emphasizes the importance of having additional teachers or group activities to provide different perspectives and social interactions for homeschooled adoptees. She also shares advice for isolated adoptees, encouraging them to be patient with themselves and seek out supportive communities. Overall, the episode sheds light on the complexities of adoption and homeschooling, urging listeners to engage with adoptees and homeschooling families to better understand and support them. Rae's insights provide valuable perspectives on the intersection of adoption and education, highlighting the need for more awareness and support for adoptees in homeschooling environments. =============== RESOURCES: Raeâs information: Find Rae as Adoptee Reclaimed on Instagram: Find Rae as Adoptee Reclaimed on Facebook: Other resources mentioned in this episode: Coalition for Responsible Home Education: Other resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:02 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:01:13 - Introducing Guest, Rae, and Discussion on Homeschooling 00:02:54 - Rae's Experience with Homeschooling and Adoption 00:04:44 - Rae's Initial Thoughts on Homeschooling 00:06:16 - Challenges Faced in Homeschooling 00:08:30 - Impact of Isolation in Homeschooling on Adoptees 00:10:00 - Transition to College and Educational Gaps 00:11:06 - Intersection of Homeschooling and Adoption 00:12:58 - Pressure to Conform in Homeschooling 00:14:31 - Potential for Abuse in Homeschooling 00:15:41 - Educational Gaps and Social Challenges in College 00:17:50 - Emotional Growth and Social Behavior 00:19:44 - Recommendations for Improving Homeschooling for Adoptees 00:22:18 - Ways to Support Adoptees in Isolated Homeschooling Environments 00:26:06 - Advice for Isolated Adoptees 00:28:06 - Conclusion and Contact Information
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The Stolen Legacy of Indigenous Adoption with Pete Patton - Ep 159
08/19/2024
The Stolen Legacy of Indigenous Adoption with Pete Patton - Ep 159
"I really want to focus on the collective nature of being stolen, because it wasn't just me. It was the vast majority of Native adoptees." -- Pete Patton Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, co-hosted by Beth Syverson and her son Joey, they interview Pete Patton,LCSW, an Indigenous Inuit adoptee who shares his experiences of being stolen and adopted. Pete discusses the historical context of racism in Oregon and the impact it had on Native American communities there and elsewhere. He also delves into his journey of reconnecting with his Indigenous heritage and the healing process he has undergone. Pete highlights the importance of understanding the collective experiences of adoptees and the need for reconnection with ancestors. The conversation sheds light on the complexities of adoption and the importance of listening to and learning from Indigenous voices. The episode emphasizes the significance of acknowledging and honoring the stories of adoptees and the importance of cultural reconnection for healing. Photo Credit for cover photo of Pete: Alberto Moreno ================ đGet our new book Adoption and Suicidality: đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Peteâs information: Contact Pete via email at Find the chapter that Pete contributed to in this book: Altogether Us: Integrating the IFS Model with Key Modalities, Communities, and Trends: Hear Pete on The One Inside: An Internal Family Systems with Tammy Sollenberger: Other resources mentioned in this episode: IFS Institute (Internal Family Systems): Here are the books Pete mentions: Braiding Sweetgrass: Indigenous Wisdom, Scientific Knowledge and the Teachings of Plants by Robin Wall Kimmerer: 1491: New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus by Charles C. Mann: The Rediscovery of America: Native Peoples and the Unmaking of U.S. History by Ned Blackhawk: The Memory of Souls by Cliff Taylor: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:01:24 - Focus on Being Stolen and Adopted 00:04:32 - Historical Context of Assimilation Policies 00:10:58 - Impact of Cultural Othering 00:14:07 - Connecting with Indigenous Community 00:18:45 - Seven B's of Indigenous-inspired IFS 00:20:20 - Shamanic Death Experience and Spiritual Journey 00:23:20 - Impact of Buffalo Population Annihilation 00:24:43 - Adoption as an Extension of Boarding Schools 00:26:02 - Sharing Collective Experiences of Adoption 00:26:56 - Upcoming Events and Conclusion
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Adoption and Suicidality with Joey Nakao, Dr. Joyce Maguire Pavao, Bruce Porth, Janell Strube, Laura L. Engel, Lorraine Dusky, Terri Dreismeier, and Melissa Brunetti - Ep 158
08/12/2024
Adoption and Suicidality with Joey Nakao, Dr. Joyce Maguire Pavao, Bruce Porth, Janell Strube, Laura L. Engel, Lorraine Dusky, Terri Dreismeier, and Melissa Brunetti - Ep 158
Adoption and Suicidality with Joey Nakao, Dr. Joyce Maguire Pavao, Bruce Porth, Janell Strube, Laura L. Engel, Lorraine Dusky, Terri Dreismeier, and Melissa Brunetti - Ep 158 "Despite working hard on a daily or moment-to-moment basis to stay alive, the poem revealed a thin thread of hope that by turning toward and befriending my pain, I might just find a way through it." -- Bruce Porth, one of the bookâs contributors â¤ď¸â𩹠If you or someone you know is suicidal, please call or text 988, the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. (Outside US, call your areaâs crisis line.) â¤ď¸â𩹠Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this special episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson delves into the complexities of adoption and its intersection with suicidality. The episode features conversations with various contributors to the newly released book "Adoption and Suicidality," which includes stories, poems, and resources for adoptees, families, healthcare professionals, and allies. The episode begins with a heartfelt conversation between Beth and her son, Joey, who co-wrote the book. Joey reflects on his journey through mental health struggles and the healing process, emphasizing the importance of sharing their experiences to help others. Following this, Beth engages in conversations with seven contributors from the book, each sharing their personal stories and insights related to adoption and suicidality. The contributors, including Dr. Joyce Maguire Pavao, Bruce Porth, Janell Strube, Laura Engel, Lorraine Dusky, Terry Dreismeier, and Melissa Brunetti, offer poignant readings from their pieces, shedding light on the emotional complexities and challenges faced within the adoption community. Throughout the episode, the contributors discuss the stigma surrounding adoption and mental health, the need for open dialogue and education, and the impact of early trauma on mental well-being. They share personal experiences of loss, grief, and resilience, highlighting the importance of community support and understanding. The episode concludes with a reflection on the powerful and emotional narratives shared, emphasizing the significance of raising awareness, providing resources, and fostering a supportive environment for adoptees and their families. The contributors' raw and honest accounts serve as a catalyst for destigmatizing adoption-related mental health struggles and promoting healing and understanding within the adoption community. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES from this episode: Purchase the book Adoption and Suicidality through Amazon as a paperback book, e-book, and audiobook: Hereâs our website with more information about the book, including the resource list in the back of the book: Find a therapist, coach, or other healing practitioner through the Healing the Adoption Constellation Database: Find adoption-related support groups and other events through our Community Calendar: Contact the contributors who spoke in this episode: Dr. Joyce Maguire Pavao: Bruce Porth: Janell Strube: Laura L. Engel: Lorraine Dusky: Terri Dreismeier: Melissa Brunetti, SMGIÂŽ Practitioner: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS Introduction to the Book: 00:00:03-00:02:10 Joey's Reflections on the Book: 00:02:14-00:04:07 Contributorsâ Introductions: 00:12:57-00:13:40 Contributor Readings and Reflections: 00:13:40-00:25:17 Discussion on Suicide and Adoption: 00:25:17-00:36:11 Impact of Adoption on Mental Health: 00:36:29-00:39:06 Reading Excerpts from Contributors: 00:40:05-01:01:20 Hope for Readers/Listeners: 01:01:30-01:21:57
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Rituals and Relationships in Adoption Reunion with Elizabeth Barbour - Ep 157
08/05/2024
Rituals and Relationships in Adoption Reunion with Elizabeth Barbour - Ep 157
"I think my mom, my adoptive mom, was probably scared that she was going to lose me to my birth family." -- Elizabeth Barbour EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson interviews guest Elizabeth Barbour, an adoptee who has been in reunion with her birth parents and 11 siblings since 1999. Elizabeth shares her personal adoption story and highlights the importance of navigating search and reunion in a healthy way. She emphasizes the need for support, education, and personal growth for all members of the adoption triad. Elizabeth also discusses the significance of rituals and ceremonies in maintaining long-term relationships post-reunion. Additionally, she mentions her upcoming book on adoption reunion and the spiritual journey she has experienced through adoption. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Connect with Elizabeth at Check out her book, Sacred Celebrations: Designing Rituals to Navigate Lifeâs Milestone Transitions: Look into the October 2024 Magical Mountain Retreat in Asheville, NC: Find Elizabeth on social media: FB: IG: LinkedIn: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Adoption and Reunion 00:05:30 - Elizabeth's Reunion Story 00:10:43 - Rituals in Reunion Celebrations 00:13:38 - Impact of Personal Adoption Experience on Parenting 00:15:33 - Family Constellations Workshop Experience 00:17:50 - Advice for Adoptive Parents in Search and Reunion 00:20:24 - Advice for Birth Parents in Reunion 00:22:41 - Spiritual Journey in Adoption and Reunion 00:24:07 - Upcoming Reunion Book Announcement 00:25:15 - Conclusion and Resource Recommendations
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Understanding The Foster Care to Prison Pipeline with Desmond DeRoo and Sara DeRoo - Ep 156
07/29/2024
Understanding The Foster Care to Prison Pipeline with Desmond DeRoo and Sara DeRoo - Ep 156
âLove is the biggest and best thing that she did â unconditional love." Desmond DeRoo EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of the podcast, I had the privilege of speaking with Desmond DeRoo, a 30-year-old currently serving his second prison term in Michigan. Desmond, who was adopted by Sarah DeRoo at the age of five after being in the foster care system, shared his experiences of growing up as a biracial child in a small white town in Michigan. Despite facing intense early childhood trauma and struggles with impulsive behavior, Desmond emphasized the importance of unconditional love and support from his adoptive family, especially his mother, Sarah. Desmond provided valuable advice for struggling youth, emphasizing the importance of finding one's passion, surrounding oneself with positive influences, and taking responsibility for one's actions. He also highlighted the significance of seeking community support and resources, especially for adoptive parents facing challenges in raising their children. The episode shed light on the failures of various systems, including the foster care, education, and criminal justice systems, in supporting individuals like Desmond. It underscored the need for greater awareness, empathy, and proactive intervention to prevent marginalized youth from falling through the cracks and entering the prison pipeline. Overall, Desmond's resilience, wisdom, and commitment to helping others serve as an inspiration for adoptive parents and individuals navigating trauma and adversity. His and his momâs joint message of hope and empowerment resonates with the importance of building supportive communities and advocating for systemic change to create a more inclusive and compassionate society. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Desmond and Saraâs information: Connect with Desmond and Sara through their website: Buy their book through Amazon: Follow on Instagram: Follow on Facebook: Other Resources: Statistics about foster care and prison that were mentioned in the intro: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction: Beth Syverson introduces herself and her role as an adoptive mom, setting the stage for the podcast episode. 00:02:41 - Foster Care to Prison Pipeline Statistics: Discussion on the statistics and challenges faced by former foster children in the criminal justice system. 00:06:29 - Desmond and Sara's Background: Introduction to Desmond and Sara DeRoo's story, highlighting their experiences with adoption and trauma. 00:09:12 - Desmond's Early Trauma and Challenges: Desmond's struggles as a biracial child in a small white town, his impulsive behavior, and encounters with the criminal justice system. 00:12:00 - Sara's Parenting Journey: Sara's experiences as a widow raising six adopted kids and blending families, navigating the complexities of adoption. 00:19:12 - Impact of Education System on Desmond: Discussion on how the education system failed Desmond and contributed to his path towards prison. 00:25:48 - Advice for Adoptive Parents: Desmond and Sara share advice for parents, emphasizing the importance of love, support, and seeking help. 00:35:16 - Desmond's Advice for Struggling Youth: Desmond offers advice for struggling youth, focusing on finding passion, surrounding oneself with positive influences, and taking responsibility for actions. 00:42:09 - Desmond's Future Plans Post-Prison: Desmond discusses his plans post-prison, including working with kids and using his experiences to help others. 00:46:55 - Final Thoughts and Advice on Adoption Journey: Desmond and Sara emphasize the importance of community, seeking support, and being open about struggles in the adoption journey.
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The Impact of Colonization on an Inuit Greenlander Adoptee in Denmark with Kâlånguak Absalonsen - Ep 155
07/22/2024
The Impact of Colonization on an Inuit Greenlander Adoptee in Denmark with Kâlånguak Absalonsen - Ep 155
"We have only ourselves. And when I'm thinking about that, I'm thinking how strong we are. Because we have survived and still live and still create and still talk about our history." -- KâlĂĄnguak Absalonsen Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with KâlĂĄnguak Absalonsen, an adopted person from Greenland living in Denmark. KâlĂĄnguak shared her unique perspective on adoption, colonization, and the challenges faced by Inuit people in Denmark. She highlighted the impact of colonization on adoption practices and the struggle to maintain cultural identity in a foreign environment. KâlĂĄnguakâs personal journey of self-discovery and reconnecting with her Inuit roots was both inspiring and heartbreaking. She emphasized the importance of giving voice to marginalized communities, like Inuit adoptees, and the strength it takes to navigate the complexities of adoption without the support of family. Through her blog, book, and advocacy work, KâlĂĄnguak is shedding light on the experiences of Inuit adoptees and challenging the narratives imposed on them by society. Her resilience and determination to reclaim her identity serve as a powerful reminder of the strength within adoptees. As the host, I was deeply moved by KâlĂĄnguakâs story and her courage to speak out. I encourage listeners to visit her website, read her book, and support her efforts to amplify the voices of Inuit adoptees. Let's continue to spread awareness and understanding of adoption's complexities and support adoptees in their journey of self-discovery and healing. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: KâlĂĄnguakâs contact information: Discovery KâlĂĄnguakâs website (in English and Danish): Connect with KâlĂĄnguak on Facebook and find her blog posts (translatable on Facebook): Hereâs her beadwork on Instagram: Check out KâlĂĄnguakâs beading handiwork in a video: And hereâs the cover of her beautiful book (in Danish) called Lille: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: Time Stamps: 00:00:00 - Introduction to KâlĂĄnguak and adoption in Denmark 00:01:32 - History Lesson on Greenland and Denmark 00:04:04 - KâlĂĄnguak's Adoption Story 00:08:18 - Challenges Faced Growing Up in Denmark 00:11:04 - Learning Style Differences 00:13:35 - Transition to Adulthood and Career Path 00:15:56 - Discovering Learning Disability 00:19:36 - Estrangement from Adoptive Parents 00:22:08 - Impact of Colonization on Identity 00:24:34 - The Impact of Adoption on KâlĂĄnguak's Life 00:26:37 - Advocacy for Inuit People and Adoptees 00:30:26 - Strength and Resilience of Adoptees
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Finding Meaning in Adversity with Stephen Rowley - Ep 154
07/15/2024
Finding Meaning in Adversity with Stephen Rowley - Ep 154
"The experience of being stuck is a pretty good place to be, I think, a lot of times in therapy and life." - Stephen Rowley Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Stephen Rowley, a school administrator, college professor, and psychotherapist who shared his fascinating journey of adoption and destiny. Steve's memoir, The Lost Coin: A Memoir of Adoption and Destiny, delves into the complexities of adoption and the impact it has had on his life. Steve shared insights into his adoption experience, including the profound moment of reconnecting with his birth mother at the age of 40. This emotional reunion brought a sense of closure and connection that Steve had been yearning for, despite the challenges and complexities that came with it. Throughout the conversation, Steve delved into the Zen concept of the lost coin, highlighting the idea of mystery and intuition in navigating life's challenges and uncertainties. He shared how his adoption and relinquishment played a significant role in shaping his response to being fired from his superintendent job, leading to a period of introspection and growth. We explored Steve's deep connection to spirituality, psychology, and therapy, discussing the importance of patience, resilience, and self-discovery in navigating life's obstacles. Steve's unique perspective on karma, belief systems, and the concept of designing one's own life path provided thought-provoking insights into personal growth and understanding. As an advocate for progressive education and a believer in creating schools that work for all children, Steve shared his vision for transformative educational practices. His experiences growing up in the Midwest and the values instilled by his family underscored the importance of respect, kindness, and community in shaping his worldview. Overall, Steve's story of adoption, resilience, and spiritual growth provided a powerful narrative of self-discovery and the transformative power of embracing life's challenges with patience and curiosity. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Stephenâs information: Buy Stephenâs book, The Lost Coin: A Memoir of Adoption and Destiny: Check out Stephenâs website: Find Stephen: on Facebook: on Instagram: on LinkedIn: or on X (Twitter): Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:05:30 - Unexpected Turn of Events 00:08:09 - Impact of Adoption on Firing 00:10:28 - Reflections on Life Choices 00:14:27 - Exploring Existential Questions 00:17:21 - Finding Meaning in Adversity 00:20:16 - Vision for Progressive Education 00:21:28 - Influence of Midwest Upbringing 00:23:34 - Contact Information and Conclusion
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Unraveling Adoption Update: New Book Launch and Other Collaborations with Beth Syverson - Ep 153
07/08/2024
Unraveling Adoption Update: New Book Launch and Other Collaborations with Beth Syverson - Ep 153
Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I, Beth Syverson, provide a detailed update on the latest happenings within the Unraveling Adoption community. As an adoptive mom to my son Joey, we are dedicated to delving into the complexities of adoption and providing support to those impacted by adoption. Book Launch Announcement: The main highlight of this episode is the impending launch of our first book in the Unraveling Adoption book series. Titled Adoption and Suicidality, this anthology features stories, poems, and resources for adoptees, families, healthcare professionals, and allies. The book, co-authored by Joey and me along with 14 contributors, aims to open up conversations about suicide, a crucial but often overlooked topic in the adoption community. The book features contributions from 11 adoptees who share their personal struggles with suicidality, as well as three mothers who tragically lost their children to suicide. Dr. Joyce Maguire Pavao, an adoptee and psychotherapist, has written the Foreword, lending her expertise to the project. The book is divided into three sections: our family story, contributions from adoptees and mothers, and a comprehensive list of resources for support. Listeners are invited to join the book launch team, where they can receive a free copy of the book in advance and help spread the word on social media. The goal is to reach a wide audience, including therapists, pediatricians, adoption agencies, and individuals with struggling teens. I also discuss upcoming books in the series, focusing on topics like adoption and sacred plant medicine and adoption and ADHD. Community Engagement: Listeners are encouraged to explore the Unraveling Adoption Patreon, where they can support the podcast and gain access to exclusive benefits. I express gratitude to current Patreon supporters and extend an invitation to join the community. Coaching Services: As a certified coach, I offer coaching services aimed at validating experiences and guiding individuals towards solutions. Special discounts are available for podcast listeners who book coaching sessions in July 2024. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES mentioned in this episode: Join the Adoption and Suicidality Book Launch Team here: Hear previous episodes by some of our bookâs contributors: Addressing LGBTQ+ Adoption Stigmas with Tony Hynes - Ep 93: Exposing the Dangers of Secrets & Lies with Greg Rostron - Ep 97: Coming Out of the Fog with Melissa Brunetti - Ep 106: Investigating Adoption's Fault Lines with Birth Mother Lorraine Dusky - Ep 108: Healing Adoption Trauma Through Alternative Therapies with Ridghaus - Ep 113: Access the Healing the Adoption Constellation Database here: Access the Community Calendar here: Become a Patreon supporter here for as little as $5/month: Find out more about my coaching here: Other recent podcasts featuring our familyâs story: Beth and Joey on Charlyn Spieringâs Adoption Uncovered podcast: Beth and Joey on Lisa Annâs Wandering Tree podcast: Beth on Speaking of Teens with Ann Coleman: Beth on Mee Ok Icaroâs podcast Live Your True Story: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== 00:00:00 - Introduction and Book Announcement 00:04:50 - Book Launch Team Invitation 00:05:32 - Resources and Ways to Get Involved 00:07:07 - Collaboration with Podcast Guests 00:08:09 - Patreon Supporter Recognition 00:13:19 - Coaching Services Offered
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Insights from Plant Medicine for the Adoption Constellation with Mee Ok Icaro and Leslie Pate Mackinnon - Ep 152
07/01/2024
Insights from Plant Medicine for the Adoption Constellation with Mee Ok Icaro and Leslie Pate Mackinnon - Ep 152
âPsychedelics can offer a portal to other consciousnesses and open spaces beyond our regular reality.â -- Mee Ok Icaro (adoptee) âPsychedelics can be a powerful tool for deep work and accessing feelingsâ. - Leslie Pate Mackinnon (birth mom) âPsychedelics can lead to transformative experiences, dividing life into before and after the journey.â -- Beth Syverson (adoptive parent) *********** All adoption constellation members (adoptees, birth/first parents, adoptive parents, and other allies) are invited to a Medicine Circle on July 7, 2024, led by Mee Ok Icaro and hosted by Unraveling Adoption. Register here: *********** Episode Summary: In this episode, we are joined by two previous guests, Leslie Pate Mackinnon and Mee Ok Icaro, to discuss the role of sacred plant medicine in their personal healing journeys and its potential to bring the adoption community together. Leslie, a birth mother, shares her experience of coming out of the adoption fog and how plant medicine has helped her access deep-seated trauma, both psychological and physical. She emphasizes the importance of doing thorough research, having a support system in place, and being open to sharing one's authentic self within the adoption community. Mee Ok, a Korean adoptee, highlights the transformative power of plant medicine in connecting with her ancestry and understanding the interconnectedness of her lineage. She emphasizes the need for adoptees to have a voice in the adoption narrative and the importance of collective healing within the community. Beth, an adoptive mother, shares her journey of exploring plant medicine as a means of healing her own trauma and supporting her son through his struggles. She reflects on the role of adoptive parents in collaborating with adoptees and birth parents to create a more compassionate and understanding adoption community. The conversation delves into the challenges and rewards of integrating plant medicine into the adoption healing process, emphasizing the need for compassion, understanding, and collaboration among all members of the adoption constellation. The guests discuss the importance of personal healing as a foundation for collective healing and the potential for plant medicine to facilitate deeper connections and empathy within the adoption community. As the episode concludes, the guests offer insights and advice for individuals interested in exploring plant medicine within the context of adoption, encouraging a mindful and intentional approach to healing and fostering unity within the adoption community. The episode serves as a reminder of the power of compassion, understanding, and shared experiences in promoting healing and growth within the adoption community. ============== RESOURCES: Mee Okâs contact information: Connect with Mee Ok through her website: Find out about Mee Okâs November 2024 ayahuasca retreat at Soltara in Costa Rica: Follow Mee Ok: on Substack: on Facebook: and on Instagram: Leslieâs contact information: Reach Leslie through her website: Follow Leslie on Facebook: Other resources mentioned in this episode: Read Michael Pollanâs book, How to Change Your Mind: What the New Science of Psychedelics Teaches Us About Consciousness, Dying, Addiction, Depression, and Transcendence: Soltara Healing Center (Costa Rica): - use MEEOK at checkout for a $200 discount. Indigenous Medicine Declaration summarized by Mee Ok Icaro: Hear Mee Okâs previous Unraveling Adoption podcast episode, âAyahuasca for Transforming Trauma and Pain with Mee Ok Icaroâ: Hear Leslieâs previous Unraveling Adoption podcast episode, âA Birth Mother's Perspective with Leslie Pate Mackinnonâ: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: ============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS Introduction to the Podcast: 00:00:02-00:00:12 Guest Introductions and Topic Introduction: 00:00:12-00:00:55 Personal Experiences with Plant Medicine: 00:00:55-00:01:30 Discussion on Individual Healing with Plant Medicine: 00:01:30-00:02:40 Leslie's Introduction and Adoption Journey: 00:02:40-00:03:54 Beth's Introduction and Adoption Journey: 00:04:00-00:05:40 Mee Ok Icaro's Introduction and Adoption Journey: 00:05:40-00:06:22 Reasons for Pursuing Plant Medicines: 00:06:22-00:08:56 Impact of Plant Medicines on Healing: 00:08:56-00:10:21 Ancestral Healing and Insights: 00:10:21-00:12:20 Healing in Relation to Adoption: 00:12:20-00:14:55 Preparation and Support for Plant Medicine Journeys: 00:15:00-00:27:03 Personal Growth and Community Healing: 00:27:03-00:39:41 Collective Healing and Collaboration: 00:39:47-00:46:33
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Pride and Resilience: A Transgender Adoptee's Path with Sanjay Pulver - Ep 151
06/24/2024
Pride and Resilience: A Transgender Adoptee's Path with Sanjay Pulver - Ep 151
"Being trans was not in my product description, and my 30-day money-back guarantee return policy has long since expired." -- Sanjay Pulver Read the transcript here: Episode Synopsis In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of hosting Sanjay Pulver, a transracial intercountry adoptee from India, who shared his unique journey as a trans man raised by white parents in San Diego, California. Sanjay's story sheds light on the complexities of being an adoptee and navigating the intersections of adoption, gender identity, and cultural heritage. Sanjay shared his origin story, revealing his relinquishment in a small village outside of Hyderabad, India, and his subsequent adoption journey to the United States. He discussed the challenges of not having access to information about his biological family and the cultural barriers in India that hinder reunion efforts for adoptees. The conversation delved into Sanjay's experience of questioning his gender identity from a young age and his journey towards transitioning, both socially and medically. He candidly discussed the complexities of coming out as a lesbian before transitioning and the mixed reactions from his adoptive parents, who initially wanted a daughter from India. As a trans adoptee, Sanjay highlighted the additional layers of identity and the challenges he faces in finding acceptance and understanding within both the adoptee and LGBTQ+ communities. He emphasized the importance of allyship and respect for trans individuals, urging listeners to prioritize using correct pronouns and avoiding invasive questions about surgeries or procedures. The episode also touched on the dangers and legislative challenges faced by trans individuals in the current political climate, emphasizing the need for support and advocacy to ensure the safety and well-being of the trans community. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Sanjayâs information: Find Sanjay on Instagram: Listen to Sanjayâs episode on Haley Radkeâs Adoptees On podcast: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== 00:05:30 - Adoption Trends from India: Sanjay Pulver discusses the history and trends of intercountry adoption from India. 00:08:03 - Questioning Gender Identity: Sanjay shares about when he started questioning his gender identity. 00:09:35 - Transitioning Process: Sanjay talks about his process of transitioning, both socially and medically. 00:11:07 - Parental Acceptance: Discussion on how Sanjay's adoptive parents reacted to his coming out as gay. 00:12:53 - Fear of Rejection: Sanjay expresses his concerns about potential rejection from his adoptive parents due to his gender identity. 00:14:13 - Reunion Considerations: Sanjay reflects on the complexities of potentially reuniting with his birth family in India. 00:17:43 - Transgender Rights: Sanjay highlights the challenges faced by trans individuals in the current political climate. 00:19:48 - Allyship for Trans People: Sanjay provides insights on how individuals can be better allies to the trans community. 00:22:43 - Respectful Communication: Discussion on the importance of respectful communication and boundaries when interacting with trans individuals. 00:24:03 - Support and Connection: Sanjay shares his contact information and future projects related to adoptees and the LGBTQ+ community. 00:27:00 - Advocacy and Recognition: Sanjay emphasizes the importance of advocacy for marginalized communities and recognition of trans elders.
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A Deep Dive into Adoption History and Motherhood with Rebecca Wellington - Ep 150
06/17/2024
A Deep Dive into Adoption History and Motherhood with Rebecca Wellington - Ep 150
"I think it's really important at this moment for us in our society to understand that we collectively and continuously, in every little micro level ways and macro level ways, differentially value mothers in America, and we are still making decisions that are rooted in really bigoted assumptions, that are rooted in racism." -- Rebecca Wellington Read the transcript: Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson welcomes guest Rebecca Wellington, an adoptee, mom, and historian, to discuss the complexities of motherhood in the context of adoption. Rebecca's new book, Who is a Worthy Mother?, serves as a hybrid memoir and adoption history, delving into the societal perceptions of motherhood and adoption in the U.S. Rebecca shares her personal adoption story, highlighting the challenges and complexities she faced growing up as an adoptee. She reflects on her journey of self-discovery and the impact of motherhood on her understanding of adoption trauma. The conversation touches on the historical context of adoption policies, including eugenics and forced sterilizations, shedding light on the systemic injustices faced by marginalized communities. The discussion also explores the recent overturning of Roe v. Wade and its implications on adoption and motherhood. Rebecca emphasizes the need for a deeper understanding of how societal biases and prejudices shape perceptions of motherhood and adoption. The episode concludes with a call to action for listeners to engage with Rebecca's book, share their reviews, and join the conversation on adoption and mothering. The episode serves as a thought-provoking exploration of the intersection of adoption, motherhood, and historical injustices, inviting listeners to reflect on their own beliefs and perceptions surrounding these topics. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Rebeccaâs information: Reach out to Rebecca and find all her links at Order Rebeccaâs book Who Is a Worthy Mother? here: Other resources mentioned in this episode: Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency by Sharon Kaplan Roszia and Allison Davis Maxon: "You Should Bea Grateful": Stories of Race, Identity, and Transracial Adoption by Angela Tucker: https://amzn.to/3KI0iIz Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== 00:00:00 - Introduction to the Podcast 00:05:30 - Becca's Adoption Story 00:10:00 - Impact of Roe vs. Wade 00:16:00 - History of Eugenics and Forced Sterilizations 00:20:00 - Understanding Motherhood in America 00:22:00 - Book Information and Call for Reviews
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Chasing the Buzz: A Foundling's Quest for Identity with Ryan Anderson - Ep 149
06/10/2024
Chasing the Buzz: A Foundling's Quest for Identity with Ryan Anderson - Ep 149
"I'm just enjoying the journey. What happens when the journey is over? Then what? So I'm just chasing the buzz." - Ryan Anderson Read the transcript; or read along while listening, if you have trouble udnerstanding Ryan's lovely Scottish accent: Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Ryan Anderson, a foundling and transnational, transracial, and late discovery adoptee. Ryan shared his incredible journey of being found on the streets of Morocco as an infant and later being adopted by an English mother and Moroccan father in Scotland. The revelation of his adoption at the age of 18 sent him on a tumultuous path of self-medication with alcohol and drugs, but he has been sober for 10 months now. Ryan's story is one of resilience and determination as he embarks on a relentless search for his birth family in Morocco. Despite facing challenges such as language barriers and limited resources, Ryan has not given up hope. He has explored various avenues, including DNA testing, visiting hospitals and courts in Morocco, and even appearing on Moroccan TV to share his story. Throughout the episode, Ryan candidly discusses his struggles with mental health, the impact of his adoption on his identity, and the ongoing quest to find his roots. Despite facing negative comments and setbacks, Ryan remains steadfast in his pursuit, driven by a deep yearning to connect with his biological family. As the host, I was struck by Ryan's unwavering determination and vulnerability in sharing his story. His journey serves as a poignant reminder of the complexities of adoption and the profound longing for belonging. Ryan's courage and resilience in the face of adversity are truly inspiring, and his willingness to share his experiences sheds light on the emotional complexities of the adoption journey. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Ryan (Peshy)âs information: Connect with Ryan on Instagram Or find him on Facebook Watch Ryanâs 15-minute YouTube video about his life: Read Ryanâs 37-page story: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: If you enjoy our podcast, please RATE and/or REVIEW Unraveling Adoption on Apple or Spotify. It really helps our episodes reach more ears. Thank you! =============== Timestamps: 00:00:02 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption: Beth Syverson introduces the podcast and herself as an adoptive mom. 00:03:10 - Desire to Help Others: Ryan Anderson discusses his burning desire to help others and his people-pleasing tendencies. 00:06:42 - Discovery of Adoption at 18: Ryan shares his experience of finding out about his adoption at the age of 18 and the impact it had on him. 00:10:06 - Coping Mechanisms During COVID: Ryan talks about how COVID-19 impacted his partying habits and led to a period of sobriety. 00:12:25 - Ongoing Search for Birth Family: Ryan discusses his ongoing search for his birth family in Morocco and the challenges he faces. 00:21:14 - Near Kidnapping Experience: Ryan recounts a harrowing experience of almost being kidnapped during a trip to Morocco. 00:24:43 - Balancing Life and Adoption Search: Ryan reflects on the balance between searching for his birth family and living his life to the fullest. 00:30:07 - Journey to Sobriety: Ryan shares his journey to sobriety and the importance of finding balance in his life.
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Behind the Scenes of Because She's Adopted: A Filmmaker's Journey with Kristal Parke - Ep 148
06/03/2024
Behind the Scenes of Because She's Adopted: A Filmmaker's Journey with Kristal Parke - Ep 148
"I truly felt the weight of the world telling the story. I felt like it was a great responsibility, but I had to do it." -- Kristal Parke Read the transcript here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of interviewing Kristal Parke, an adoptee and filmmaker behind the acclaimed documentary Because She's Adopted. Kristal shared her journey of self-discovery and identity exploration through the creation of her film, which delves into her childhood, reunion with her birth mother, struggle with addiction, and intentional reconnection with her Indigenous heritage. The film has received critical acclaim and won awards, shedding light on the complexities of adoption. Kristal discussed the impact of her film on her family, crew, and herself, highlighting the vulnerability and growth that came with sharing her story. She emphasized the importance of owning her narrative and the evolution of her understanding of adoption. The podcast episode also touched on the behind-the-scenes process of creating the documentary, including the support of her adoptive family, crew members, and the challenges and joys of filming. Listeners were encouraged to watch the film, which is set to be officially released by fall 2024. Kristal shared details on how to stay connected with updates and screenings. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Kristalâs information: Check our Kristalâs filmâs website to keep informed of future events: Follow the film at Facebook: Or on Instagram: Email Kristal at Watch a trailer of the film Because Sheâs Adopted: Catch the Hiraeth Hope & Healing screening on June 15, 2024: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== Timestamps: 00:00:02 - Introduction to Kristal Parke: Beth introduces Kristal Parke, a Canadian adoptee and filmmaker, and talks about her acclaimed documentary "Because She's Adopted." 00:05:31 - Unique Adoption Story: Kristal shares the unique story of how she was chosen based on her gender for adoption. 00:10:18 - Residential School Trauma: Kristal discusses the traumatic experiences of Indigenous children in Canadian residential schools. 00:12:26 - Reunion with Birth Mother: Kristal recounts her emotional reunion with her birth mother and meeting her older brother. 00:14:58 - Impact on Family: Kristal reflects on how her family, including her brothers and father, were affected by the documentary. 00:17:43 - Supportive Husband: Kristal talks about the role of her husband in the documentary and the title choice "Because She's Adopted." 00:20:16 - Serene Reflection: Kristal describes a peaceful moment in Manitoba that symbolized her journey of self-discovery during filming. 00:24:27 - Personal Growth: Kristal shares how making the film helped her own her story and continue her journey of self-discovery. 00:26:33 - Film Release Information: Kristal provides details on how to watch the film and stay connected for updates.
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The Impact of Divorce on Adopted Children with Jane Spreckley - Ep 147
05/27/2024
The Impact of Divorce on Adopted Children with Jane Spreckley - Ep 147
âI didn't want to lose them. I loved them both and I thought, it's hard to think about your life separated. I guess now knowing all that I know about being separated from the first person that I was supposed to be with, you know, I just never wanted to be separated from either one of them.â -- Jane Spreckley Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, the host, Beth Syverson, interviews Jane Spreckley, an adoptee whose adoptive parents divorced when she was 14 years old. Jane shares her experience of how the divorce activated her abandonment issues and impacted her relationships. She emphasizes the importance of adoptive parents seeking therapy with adoption-competent therapists for their children during difficult times like divorce. Jane also highlights the significance of open communication and compassion within families going through similar situations. The conversation sheds light on the complexities adoptees face during divorce and the need for understanding and support. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Janeâs information: Find Jane on Facebook at Email Jane at Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== Timestamps: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Podcast 00:05:30 - Jane's Experience with Parents' Divorce 00:10:00 - Realization of Impact from First Abandonment 00:13:30 - Advice for Adoptive Parents Going Through Divorce 00:17:20 - Advice for Adoptees Dealing with Divorcing Parents 00:20:00 - Encouragement for Self-Compassion and Support for Jane 00:21:30 - Gratitude to Patreon Supporters and Call to Share the Episode
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Wrestling with Social Anxiety as an Adoptee with Tammy Murphy - Ep 146
05/20/2024
Wrestling with Social Anxiety as an Adoptee with Tammy Murphy - Ep 146
âI have a hard time believing in love, that love just really exists, that you can love somebody. Then I feel like I have a hard time loving men and stuff, so I wouldn't want them to get hurt if they ever felt like I didn't love them.â - Tammy Murphy Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Tammy Murphy, a Black, same-race, domestic adoptee living in Indiana. Tammy shared her struggles with social anxiety and dissociation, stemming from her adoption experience. She recounted how her adoptive mother's inconsistent responses to her questions about being adopted led to confusion and a sense of not belonging. Tammy also shared her journey of self-medication with substances like alcohol and marijuana to cope with her feelings of disconnect and identity crisis. Despite facing challenges in forming deep relationships and feeling a sense of authenticity, Tammy has taken steps towards healing. She recently started therapy and has begun journaling to identify triggers and coping mechanisms. Tammy expressed her aspirations to become an adoption therapist and to write a memoir titled Two to Forgive, focusing on forgiveness towards her birth mother and adoptive mother. Throughout the episode, Tammy emphasized the importance of honesty in adoptive families, early communication about adoption, and seeking therapy and self-help resources to navigate the complexities of adoption trauma. =============== đ Community Calendar: â¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: đSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: =============== RESOURCES: Resource mentioned in this episode: Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency: A Comprehensive Guide to Promoting Understanding and Healing In Adoption, Foster Care, Kinship Families and Third Party Reproduction: Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionâs Challenges: Other Parents Like Me - Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Find us on , , and Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Check out our website: Create your own podcast through Libsyn: =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:05:30 - Connecting with Others as an Adoptee 00:11:01 - Seeking Therapy and Beginning to Address Adoption Trauma 00:14:06 - Future Goals: Becoming an Adoption Therapist 00:15:50 - Advice for Adoptive Parents: Honesty and Openness 00:16:40 - Impact of Lies and Deception on Adoptees 00:18:16 - Advice for Adoptees: Therapy, Emotional Intelligence, and Coping Strategies
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