A Natural Father Fighting the Adoption Machine with Paul Fiscus - Ep 125
Release Date: 12/25/2023
Unraveling Adoption
"We have only ourselves. And when I'm thinking about that, I'm thinking how strong we are. Because we have survived and still live and still create and still talk about our history." -- KΓ’lΓ‘nguak Absalonsen πππJoin the Book Launch Team for our soon-to-be-published book Adoption and Suicidality by clicking here: πππ Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with KΓ’lΓ‘nguak Absalonsen, an adopted person from Greenland living in Denmark. KΓ’lΓ‘nguak shared her unique perspective on adoption, colonization, and the...
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
"The experience of being stuck is a pretty good place to be, I think, a lot of times in therapy and life." - Stephen Rowley πππJoin the Book Launch Team for our soon-to-be-published book Adoption and Suicidality by clicking here: πππ Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Stephen Rowley, a school administrator, college professor, and psychotherapist who shared his fascinating journey of adoption and destiny. Steve's memoir, The Lost Coin: A Memoir of Adoption and Destiny, delves into the complexities of adoption...
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I, Beth Syverson, provide a detailed update on the latest happenings within the Unraveling Adoption community. As an adoptive mom to my son Joey, we are dedicated to delving into the complexities of adoption and providing support to those impacted by adoption. Book Launch Announcement: The main highlight of this episode is the impending launch of our first book in the Unraveling Adoption book series. Titled Adoption and Suicidality, this anthology features stories, poems, and resources for adoptees, families, healthcare...
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
βPsychedelics can offer a portal to other consciousnesses and open spaces beyond our regular reality.β -- Mee Ok Icaro (adoptee) βPsychedelics can be a powerful tool for deep work and accessing feelingsβ. - Leslie Pate Mackinnon (birth mom) βPsychedelics can lead to transformative experiences, dividing life into before and after the journey.β -- Beth Syverson (adoptive parent) *********** All adoption constellation members (adoptees, birth/first parents, adoptive parents, and other allies) are invited to a Medicine Circle on July 7, 2024, led by Mee Ok Icaro and...
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
"Being trans was not in my product description, and my 30-day money-back guarantee return policy has long since expired." -- Sanjay Pulver Read the transcript here: Episode Synopsis In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of hosting Sanjay Pulver, a transracial intercountry adoptee from India, who shared his unique journey as a trans man raised by white parents in San Diego, California. Sanjay's story sheds light on the complexities of being an adoptee and navigating the intersections of adoption, gender identity, and cultural heritage. Sanjay shared his origin story,...
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
"I think it's really important at this moment for us in our society to understand that we collectively and continuously, in every little micro level ways and macro level ways, differentially value mothers in America, and we are still making decisions that are rooted in really bigoted assumptions, that are rooted in racism." -- Rebecca Wellington Read the transcript: Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, host Beth Syverson welcomes guest Rebecca Wellington, an adoptee, mom, and historian, to discuss the complexities of motherhood in the context of adoption....
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
"I'm just enjoying the journey. What happens when the journey is over? Then what? So I'm just chasing the buzz." - Ryan Anderson Read the transcript; or read along while listening, if you have trouble udnerstanding Ryan's lovely Scottish accent: Podcast Episode Synopsis: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Ryan Anderson, a foundling and transnational, transracial, and late discovery adoptee. Ryan shared his incredible journey of being found on the streets of...
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
"I truly felt the weight of the world telling the story. I felt like it was a great responsibility, but I had to do it." -- Kristal Parke Read the transcript here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of interviewing Kristal Parke, an adoptee and filmmaker behind the acclaimed documentary Because She's Adopted. Kristal shared her journey of self-discovery and identity exploration through the creation of her film, which delves into her childhood, reunion with her birth mother, struggle with addiction, and intentional reconnection with her Indigenous...
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
βI didn't want to lose them. I loved them both and I thought, it's hard to think about your life separated. I guess now knowing all that I know about being separated from the first person that I was supposed to be with, you know, I just never wanted to be separated from either one of them.β -- Jane Spreckley Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, the host, Beth Syverson, interviews Jane Spreckley, an adoptee whose adoptive parents divorced when she was 14 years old. Jane shares her experience of how the divorce activated her abandonment issues and impacted her...
info_outlineUnraveling Adoption
βI have a hard time believing in love, that love just really exists, that you can love somebody. Then I feel like I have a hard time loving men and stuff, so I wouldn't want them to get hurt if they ever felt like I didn't love them.β - Tammy Murphy Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Tammy Murphy, a Black, same-race, domestic adoptee living in Indiana. Tammy shared her struggles with social anxiety and dissociation, stemming from her adoption experience. She recounted how her adoptive mother's inconsistent responses to her...
info_outline"Adoption is about finding homes for babies, not about finding babies for families." -- Paul Fiscus
Do you want to see an increase in awareness and advocacy for natural fathers? Join me in listening to Paul Fiscus' plea for greater support and recognition for natural fathers. He hasn't seen his 5-year-old daughter Eliza since she was an infant. Through our discussion, you will learn actionable steps to raise awareness and advocate for the rights of natural fathers. Together, we can make a difference and bring about positive change for fathers fighting for their right to parent.
In this episode, you will be able to:
-
Discover the impact of unjust treatment of natural parents in adoption.
-
Uncover the corruption in the adoption system and its impact on parental rights.
-
Explore the role of racism in adoption cases and its effects on natural fathers.
-
Advocate for parental rights and learn how to increase awareness and support for natural fathers.
My special guest is Paul Fiscus
Paul Fiscus, a devoted natural father, brings a unique perspective to the discussion on adoption and custody rights. His personal experiences have propelled him to become a passionate advocate for the rights of natural fathers. Paul's unwavering determination and in-depth understanding of the legal intricacies surrounding adoption highlight the hurdles that natural fathers can sometimes encounter. His insights and commitment to creating change in the treatment of natural fathers make him an invaluable voice in the ongoing dialogue about fathers' rights in the adoption process.
ππππππππ
π Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar
β¨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing
πSign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX
ππππππππ
The resources mentioned in this episode are:
-
Visit the website freeeliza.com to learn more about Paul's fight for his daughter and to stay updated on his advocacy efforts.
-
Connect with Paul directly by emailing him at [email protected] if you have any specific questions or want to offer support or assistance.
- Connect with the Free Eliza group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/freeeliza
-
Support or volunteer for Saving Our Sisters with Renee Gelin: https://savingoursistersadoption.org/
ππππππππ
Other Resources:
-
APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoptionβs Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude
-
Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com
-
Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/
-
Adoptee-Therapist Directory: https://growbeyondwords.com/adoptee-therapist-directory/
ππππππππ
Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson
Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao
Email questions or comments to [email protected]
Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube
Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption
Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION
ππππππππ
Understand Unjust Treatment in Adoption
The adoption industry is a tumultuous space characterized by decisions that can often feel arbitrary and unjust to the affected parties. This is highlighted in Paul Fiscus' experience where he faced severe challenges in fighting for his rights as a natural father. The bias and seeming corruption in the system reflect a pressing need for increased dialogue, ethical practices and actionable reform to provide fair treatment for all parties involved.
Timestamped summary of this episode:
00:00:00 - Introduction and Background
Beth Syverson introduces the podcast and her guest, Paul Fiscus, who shares his experience as a natural father to a daughter he hasn't seen since infancy. The conversation aims to shed light on the complexities and injustices of adoption.
00:01:16 - Becoming a Father
Paul Fiscus shares his experience of finding out about becoming a father at 39 and the complexities of his relationship with the natural mother of his daughter. He discusses the challenges of co-parenting and the impact of the mother's bipolar disorder on their plans.
00:04:00 - Relinquishment and Legal Battles
Paul discusses the challenges he faced when the natural mother cut off contact and the subsequent relinquishment of his daughter for adoption. He details the legal battles, ethical violations, and his relentless efforts to fight for his parental rights.
00:08:48 - Birth Mother's Motivation
Paul reveals the birth mother's motivations, including her refusal to co-parent, control issues, and financial gains from the adoption. He highlights the unethical practices within the adoption industry and the impact on his daughter's well-being.
00:12:42 - Adoptive Parents' Role
Paul discusses the refusal of the adoptive parents to communicate with him and their perspective on the legal process. He emphasizes the ethical and moral considerations surrounding the adoption of his daughter.
00:13:00 - Filing for Paternity
Paul shares his experience of filing for paternity despite uncertainty about being the biological father. He discusses the legal process, including the petition and motions filed.
00:14:38 - Legal Battle and Emotional Toll
Paul recounts the emotional and legal challenges he faced in the courtroom. He details the accusations made against him and the impact it had on his mental health.
00:18:48 - Seeking Relief
Paul discusses his current legal actions, including filing a writ to the US Supreme Court. He expresses frustration with the legal system and the challenges he faces in seeking justice for his situation.
00:20:26 - Emotional Impact and Coping
Paul opens up about the emotional toll of the situation, including struggles with PTSD and managing anger. He shares how music and meditation have helped him cope.
00:22:56 - Last Legal Resort
Paul explains that filing a writ to the US Supreme Court is his last legal option. He also discusses potential motives behind the opposition he has faced in the legal system.
00:25:49 - Coping with lack of support
Paul discusses the lack of support he has received and the impact it has had on him. He mentions feeling frustrated and unheard, highlighting the need for awareness and advocacy for fathers in similar situations.
00:26:24 - Race and adoption
The conversation delves into the racial dynamics of adoption, with Paul noting the disparity in outcomes for Caucasian fathers compared to Hispanic or African American fathers. They discuss the disturbing implications of this racial divide in the adoption process.
00:27:43 - Gender dynamics in the legal system
The conversation touches on the frustration with the legal system, particularly the role of judges who are often parents themselves. They explore the challenges of advocating for parental rights in a system that seems to favor certain demographics.
00:29:00 - Impact on the child
The discussion delves into the emotional impact on Paul's daughter, Eliza, and the potential consequences of the misinformation she may have been exposed to. They express concern for the future relationship between Eliza and her adoptive parents.
00:33:32 - Call to action
Paul emphasizes the importance of raising awareness and promoting ethical adoption practices. He encourages listeners to share the episode and engage in advocacy efforts to support ethical family preservation and child welfare.