A Disappeared Adoptee Reunites with Revolutionary Roots - with Nelson de Witt - Ep 133
Release Date: 02/19/2024
Adoption Songs: Exploring the Complexities of Adoption Through Music with Lori Evans Ermi and Kate Ermi
Unraveling Adoption
"I think now that we have this knowledge, then we can use our story to help create awareness." - Lori Evans Ermi Read the transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JDRMT4Z5RGJ6SD35WBFBT4PM EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of welcoming Lori Evans Ermi and her 17-year-old daughter, Kate Ermi, both of whom are adoptees and co-wrote their new book, Adoption Songs. Our conversation delved into the complexities of adoption from their unique perspectives, highlighting the emotional layers that come with their experiences. Lori shared her journey as a...
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The Male Adoptee Experience: Understanding Anger, Vulnerability, and Community with Tim Perdion - Ep 172
Unraveling Adoption
"I almost feel like there was a blueprint, and I was a character to fit into that blueprint." -- Tim Perdion Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the opportunity to speak with Tim Perdion, an adoptee from Ohio who has spent the last decade navigating his journey of self-discovery and healing. Tim shares his experience of being adopted shortly after birth and the feelings of not belonging that plagued him throughout his childhood. Despite growing up in a loving family, he struggled with anger and a sense of isolation, which led him to seek validation through sports and...
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The Plants Are Calling for the Adoption Constellation with Mee Ok Icaro - Ep 171
Unraveling Adoption
"The plants are always turning everything upside down because our culture is upside down." -- Mee Ok Icaro EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I, Beth Syverson, welcome back Mee Ok Icaro, a previous guest who has shared her profound insights on adoption and healing through plant medicine. This episode is particularly special as we recorded as we prepared for an ayahuasca retreat in Costa Rica, where I participated in my first ceremony under Mee Ok’s guidance. We begin by discussing our feelings as the retreat approaches. I express my excitement mixed with a hint of fear,...
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Finding Empowerment through Sex Work as a Korean Adoptee with Kayla Tange - Ep 170
Unraveling Adoption
Finding Empowerment through Sex Work as a Korean Adoptee with Kayla Tange "I can be in my body, and in that moment, I feel safe." -- Kayla Tange EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Kayla Tange, a Korean adoptee raised by Japanese-American parents. She has navigated a unique and complex journey through life as an exotic dancer, performance artist, and sex worker. Kayla shared her adoption story, detailing her early life in an orphanage in Seoul before being adopted at six months old. We explored how her experiences with ADHD and...
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From Ethiopia to America and Back Again: An Adoptee’s Fight for Justice with Mike Davis and Maureen McCauley - Ep 169
Unraveling Adoption
"I thought I'll go to the embassy and I'll clear this up. Yeah, that I was adopted legally and I was US citizen." -- Mike Davis READ THE TRANSCRIPT HERE: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Mike Davis, an intercountry adoptee whose story sheds light on the often-overlooked complexities of adoption, particularly regarding citizenship issues. Mike was adopted from Ethiopia at the age of eight by an African-American single father and grew up in the U.S. However, in the mid-1990s, he discovered that he was not a U.S. citizen,...
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Educating the Next Generation: Adoption Messages in Children's Books with Allison Olson - Ep 168
Unraveling Adoption
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Creative Paths to Healing Childhood Trauma with Jonathan Moon - Ep 167
Unraveling Adoption
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The Realities of Open Adoption with a Mother-Daughter Duo with Linda and Belle Sexton - Ep 166
Unraveling Adoption
"I think my mom does a great job addressing this in the book, but open adoption is not without its challenges." - Belle Sexton Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the honor of speaking with Linda R. Sexton, an adoptive mom and author, and her 25-year-old daughter, Belle. This marks our first mother-daughter duo on the podcast, offering a unique perspective on open adoption. Linda R. Sexton is an author, speaker and blogger. She is an adoptive mom of two children, both in open arrangements, and is the author of the award-winning book, . The story is told with frank...
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The Intersection of Politics and Adoption with Mark H. - Ep 165
Unraveling Adoption
"The way that fascism triumphs is if everyone goes silent and becomes quiescent." - Mark H. EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I, Beth Syverson, welcome Mark, a transracial adoptee from Korea and a passionate advocate for adoption-related issues. Together, we delve into the often-overlooked intersection of politics and adoption, particularly in the context of the upcoming U.S. presidential election. As an adoptive mom of a 20-year-old son, Joey, who is navigating his own path, I feel a deep responsibility to address the complexities surrounding adoption and how they...
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Unpacking Adoption Trauma: Insights from an Adoptive Parent with Stacey Uhrig - Ep 164
Unraveling Adoption
“They [our kids] can't be more regulated than you are. They can only be as regulated as the least regulated person in the house.” - Stacey Uhrig EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Stacey Uhrig, an adoptive parent and certified trauma recovery coach. Stacey shared her journey into adoption, which began after her own struggles with infertility. She emphasized the emotional complexities and challenges that come with adoption, particularly the trauma that both adoptees and adoptive parents may face. Stacey discussed her...
info_outlineMy adoptive father talked about it as my birthright to go back to Central America. I really like that framing. So I think that was part of the reason why they let me go on so many trips and that was such a wonderful experience. - Nelson de Witt
Discover the shocking truth about Nelson de Witt's journey to uncover his past after being adopted from Central America. His story is a heart-wrenching tale of forced disappearances, political strife, and the courage to face the truth. Nelson's experiences will leave you in awe and disbelief as he navigates the complexities of adoption and the impact of historical and cultural tragedies. Stay tuned to learn more about Nelson's daring quest for truth and how it continues to shape his life today.
In this episode, you will be able to:
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Understand the impact of forced disappearances on families in Central and South America.
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Explore the complexities of political conflicts in Central America and how it impacted him as an adopted person.
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Dive into the importance of understanding historical and cultural contexts of adoptees' early lives.
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My special guest is Nelson de Witt
Nelson de Witt, also known as Nelson/Roberto, is an advocate and survivor of El Salvador's civil war. He experienced a forced disappearance as a one-year-old and was reunited with his birth family at the age of 16. Nelson's personal story sheds light on the impact of forced disappearances on families. Through his experiences, he brings a unique perspective that helps to unravel the complexities of adoption and the historical and cultural context of the forced disappearances in Central and South America. His insights and advocacy work contribute to a greater understanding of the profound effects of such events on those involved - adopted or not.
The resources mentioned in this episode are:
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Visit Nelson/Roberto's website at Nelsonroberto.com to learn more about his documentary film Identifying Nelson/Buscando Roberto and his book Waking from Innocent Dreams.
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Check out the book Missing Mila, Finding Family written by Nelson's adoptive mother, which provides her perspective on the adoption story: https://amzn.to/4bDAABo
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Keep an eye out for Nelson's upcoming story workshops for adoptees, which he may be launching publicly later in the year.
- Follow Nelson on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/dewittn19/
Impact of Forced Disappearances
Influenced by social, political, and personal factors, forced disappearances have far-reaching impacts on families and societies. The individuals left behind wrestle with prolonged uncertainty, emotional distress, and other psychological ramifications. Being aware of the deep emotional trauma fostered by forced disappearances aids us in comprehending the resilience shown by survivors and provides better support and understanding to those affected.
Political Conflicts in Central America
Historical instances of political unrest in Central America have resulted in numerous human rights violations, including forced disappearances. These conflicts are multifaceted, characterized by fluid alliances, entrenched inequality, and differing ideological perspectives. By understanding these complexities, we gain a deeper insight into the atmosphere that gives rise to phenomena such as forced disappearances and how these events impact individuals and communities.
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Other Resources:
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APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude
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Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com
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Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/
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Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson
Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao
Email questions or comments to [email protected]
Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube
Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption
Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com
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Timestamped summary of this episode:
00:00:00 - Introduction and Background
Beth introduces the podcast and herself as an adoptive mom, along with her guest Nelson de Witt. Nelson shares his experience of being separated from his birth family during El Salvador's civil war and being reunited with them at the age of 16.
00:01:09 - Growing Up and Discovery
Nelson talks about growing up in his adoptive family, being told he was adopted, and the mystery surrounding his adoption. He shares the shocking news of being reunited with his biological family and the intense emotions and overwhelming experience of meeting them for the first time.
00:04:18 - Adoption and Reunion
Nelson's adoptive parents share the harrowing discovery of Nelson's origins, including his parents being revolutionaries in the civil war, the kidnapping of a businessman, and the tragic events that led to Nelson being put up for adoption in the United States.
00:10:30 - Complexities of Central American History
Nelson delves into the complex history of conflict in Central America, highlighting the repressive government, violent suppression of activists, and the desperate measures people took to fight back, including taking up arms as a last resort.
00:13:26 - The Disappeared and Forced Disappearances
Nelson explains the term "disappeared" and its origin, detailing how individuals were forcibly abducted by the state as a tactic of fear or intimidation during the civil war in El Salvador. He also shares personal accounts of friends who were taken at gunpoint.
00:14:40 - Forced Disappearance in Central and South America
Nelson discusses the backdrop of the term "disappeared" (Desaparacido) and the cultural significance rooted in families missing loved ones. Over 100,000 people have been forcibly disappeared since 1950, with the majority presumed dead.
00:16:08 - The Unresolved Mystery
Nelson shares his experience of being reunited with his birth father at 16, who knew about his survival and adoption but had no idea about what happened to his wife and child. The unresolved fate of his birth mother is a lingering question.
00:18:27 - Reconnecting with Birth Family
Nelson reflects on his incredible journey of reuniting with his birth family and the challenges and excitement of embracing a new culture. He acknowledges the support and difficulty faced by his adoptive parents throughout the process.
00:21:26 - The Nature of Adoption
Nelson emphasizes the importance of acknowledging an adoptee's history and roots, beyond the nurture received from adoptive parents. He shares the positive impact of being allowed to explore his birthright in Central America.
00:25:19 - Continuing Issue of Forced Disappearances
The conversation ends on a poignant note as Nelson highlights the ongoing issue of forced disappearances in Central and South America to this day. He calls for awareness and support to make necessary changes.