Ep. 12 - Our Life in Parallel

Susan embarks on a powerful exploration of forgiveness, revealing the four key characteristics that bridged the gap between her and her mother: fear, courage, strength and love. Today’s focus delves into emotional inheritance, where Susan discovers these shared traits woven into the fabric of their relationship. Through compelling personal anecdotes, Susan draws parallels between her experiences and her mother’s, offering insights into how you can identify these same characteristics within yourself. Prepare to be surprised as she unveils a hidden truth about her mother’s long-standing relationship with her second husband. Join Susan as she continues to shed light on her family’s intimate story, offering valuable lessons on forgiveness and the impact of emotional inheritance. 

 

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [0:29] Susan explains how to parallel your life with another person

• [2:01] What is emotional inheritance? Susan believes that she and her mother share characteristics, the first being fear

• [7:11] Courage is another common denominator between Susan and her mother, and she learns of a shocking move her mother had made requiring immense courage

• [15:00] Susan reveals the steps in her life that were courageous. She also sees strength in herself and her mother

• [21:58] Susan explains that the love that she and her mother had for each other kept them continuing to seek acceptance from one another throughout their relationship

 

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Mapping out your life with another person's life in parallel allows you to see all the times you are not together, doing the same things, attending the same events. It will enable you to separate your life from theirs and to see them as a person separate from yourself

• Divorce is a step of courage because you are stepping into the unknown.  Stepping away from a family’s expectations can be incredibly challenging, requiring courage and self-awareness

• Strength of mind and character enables a person to withstand the hurtful and negative things life throws at you, pain from an illness being one 

 

QUOTES:

“When we are ready to unpack our inheritance, we can confront the ghosts we carry within. What is the life in parallel? What is that emotional inheritance that I got from my mother as she's living inside of me? The first is fear. We both started our lives with the fear of survival. This fear that came with our birth honed a deep alignment with our intuition. It informed and formed us before we had consciousness of thought or action or words to describe what we know and feel.” Susan Gibson

“I always say it takes a lot of courage to do something different, something outside the norms that have defined our way of being and doing outside of the conditioning that we've experienced, whether it's the conditioning of working within an organization or the conditioning of society and community or the conditioning of our family's influence.” Susan Gibson

 

RESOURCES:

Susan Gibson - Email

 

ABOUT THE HOST:

Susan Gibson grew up in a small town in Northern Maine, the only surviving child of parents who married young and divorced young. From the influence of their shared experiences, Susan has learned two things that are core to who she is: the value of community and the power of having a voice.

Susan has spent her entire academic and professional career as a woman in tech, starting her career as a developer in the mid-80s to today, where she is CEO of Temenos+Agility, a management consulting company she co-founded with her partner, Siraj Sirajuddin, where they help enterprises transform organizationally and personally, to find a more meaningful way to deliver value to their customers.

Susan is a frequent contributor to the Women in Tech (WiT) Regatta and speaks at public and private events worldwide, using her voice to grow communities of women, mentors and allies in tech. 

Susan has many lifelong pursuits - healthy eating, fitness, yoga & meditation, music, theater, opera, reading, movies, travel, family and friends. She is also rebuilding her family’s 110-year-old homestead in Northern Maine, a true labor of love.