Jumping on the Bridge of Faith with Emma Mcilroy
The Gospel of Direct Experience
Release Date: 06/11/2025
Ask Us Anything—Live!
The Gospel of Direct Experience
Welcome to our very first live AMA episode—unscripted and full of spirit. Listeners showed up with real questions about prayer, mystical experience, cryptids, and the strange space where the psychological meets the spiritual. We talked about what it means to pray when God no longer fits, how to trust the knowledge of the heart, why some people encounter the sacred and others don’t, and whether Bigfoot might just be a messenger from beyond (seriously). It was thoughtful, honest, sometimes strange, and fun! Thanks to everyone who joined us live—and if you missed it, we hope to see you...
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Jumping on the Bridge of Faith with Emma Mcilroy
The Gospel of Direct Experience
In this powerful and personal episode, we sit down with Emma Mcilroy—queer feminist, immigrant, entrepreneur, and CEO of —for a conversation that dives deep into faith, identity, capitalism, and surviving life's darkest valleys. Emma shares her journey of reconciling her sexuality with her faith, the near-death experience surrounding the birth of her son, and how a private, hard-won relationship with God became her unshakable bridge. We explore what it means to wrestle with faith, lead with integrity, and hold onto Spirit in a world that often demands compromise. Episode Highlights ...
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When You Make the Two One: Gnosis & Healing the Duality
The Gospel of Direct Experience
What if the path to salvation isn’t belief—but integration? Building off our last episode, Jeff and Michael unpack a mysterious saying from the Gospel of Thomas about making “the two one,” and explore how ancient Gnostic wisdom speaks to our divided modern selves. Jeff shares a concluding dream that becomes a portal into the deeper meaning of inner and outer reconciliation, while Michael reflects on the radical claim that knowing yourself might be the same as knowing God. Episode Highlights [00:01:54] Gnosticism & Direct Experience Jeff and Michael introduce the Gnostic theme...
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When You Know Yourself: Gnostic Revelations from Nag Hammadi
The Gospel of Direct Experience
What if the spiritual texts we grew up with only told part of the story? In this episode, Jeff and Michael explore the discovery of the Nag Hammadi Library—a collection of ancient, long-buried texts that include radically different teachings attributed to Jesus, including the enigmatic Gospel of Thomas. These writings challenge many assumptions of mainstream Christianity and open a doorway into a spirituality centered on inner knowing, direct experience, and the integration of what is within and what is without. Then Jeff shares a recent dream that unexpectedly mirrors the themes of the...
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Knowledge Must Bow to Spirit: A Journey with George Inness
The Gospel of Direct Experience
What if a long-dead painter could reach across time to guide your spiritual awakening? In this episode, Jeff shares the astonishing true story of how George Inness—a 19th-century landscape artist and mystic—emerged as a living spirit guide in his life. From a chance encounter at a museum to a series of visionary dreams filled with barns, handprints, and transfigured light-beings, Jeff and Michael explore how spirit invites us to see beyond appearances, surrender our over-love of knowledge, and walk the ancient, living path of direct experience. This is an episode about listening deeply,...
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Waking Up: Dreams, Enlightenment, and the Space Between
The Gospel of Direct Experience
What if waking up isn’t a single breakthrough moment—but a layered, looping journey through insight, fear, wonder, and mystery? In this episode, we explore the complex terrain of spiritual awakening through dreams, false awakenings, mystical encounters, and moments of terrifying clarity. From Michael’s lucid Spirit Train dream to Jeff’s powerful visitation from a fierce divine feminine presence, we ask: What does it really mean to wake up—is it a one time affair or is it a journey, a process? We dig into the paradoxes of awakening: how it can feel ecstatic or annihilating, grounding...
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Searching for a God We Will Never Find with John Hamilton
The Gospel of Direct Experience
What happens when the walls of traditional religion crumble, and all that’s left is raw, unfiltered awe? In this episode we sit down with John Hamilton—UCC minister, musician, and author of the excellent theological memoir Honest to God. Guided by the book, the three of us dive into the chaos and beauty of spiritual awakening in an era of collapsing institutions. John Hamilton was born into a spirited Irish-American family of singers and storytellers. Breaking with his strict Catholic upbringing, he embarked on a career in music that immersed him in the colorful but dangerous world...
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The Homa & the Chapel Perilous
The Gospel of Direct Experience
What happens when you call on Jesus in an ancient Vedic fire ritual? Will he show up? How? In this episode, Michael shares his experience with Homa, a Vedic fire ceremony, and what happened when he decided to dedicate it to Jesus. The result was an unfolding series of synchronicities—stretching across years, continents, and eventually even into the Spirit Train dream—culminating in a moment of undeniable presence. Meanwhile, we explore the Chapel Perilous, the threshold between belief and madness, where meaning breaks through in ways that can’t be ignored. We briefly summarize the...
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Awaken in the Dream with Paul Levy
The Gospel of Direct Experience
Read Paul's full bio and the time-stamped episode highlights in the on the website. While you're there: to keep up to date on the all the latest from us about your own experiences, questions, comments Read the latest blog post:
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All Aboard the Spirit Train: Dreams, Discernment, and Anxiety
The Gospel of Direct Experience
What if your anxieties weren’t obstacles but doorways? What if your dreams aren’t nonsense, but portals to deeper wisdom, hidden truths, and paths yet unseen? What if the very fears that keep you up at night are the same forces trying to wake you up? In this episode Michael recounts a dream of cosmic proportions—one that begins in the disorienting corridors of an ever-shifting church and ends aboard a song-filled dragon train soaring into the multiverse. Along the way, we wrestle with discernment, anxiety, and the unsettling realization that reality itself may be more dreamlike than we...
info_outlineIn this powerful and personal episode, we sit down with Emma Mcilroy—queer feminist, immigrant, entrepreneur, and CEO of Wildfang—for a conversation that dives deep into faith, identity, capitalism, and surviving life's darkest valleys. Emma shares her journey of reconciling her sexuality with her faith, the near-death experience surrounding the birth of her son, and how a private, hard-won relationship with God became her unshakable bridge. We explore what it means to wrestle with faith, lead with integrity, and hold onto Spirit in a world that often demands compromise.
Episode Highlights
[00:03:35] Coming Out, Falling Apart, and Finding the Bridge
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Emma reflects on immigrating to the US, falling in love with a woman and coming out, and feeling her world fall down all around her. She turns inward and begins a one-on-one wrestling match with God. Her image of faith as a fragile-seeming rope bridge that somehow holds despite appearances becomes a central metaphor of the episode.
[00:17:26] Birth, Breakdown, and a Waiting Room Miracle
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Emma recounts her traumatic childbirth story—HELLP syndrome, a near-stroke, and a harrowing return to the hospital just days after giving birth. Faith, Emma concludes, isn’t about having answers. It’s about being open, vulnerable, and present in the moment when everything falls apart—and trusting that something or someone will meet you there.
[00:30:33] Capitalism and Christianity: Leading Without Losing Your Soul
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Emma explores how her faith shapes her work as a CEO in a profit-driven world. From donating over a million dollars to fostering authentic workplace relationships, she strives to let her values guide her leadership. Still, she confesses the tension between her ethics and the demands of the system she operates within.
[00:47:35] Parenting, Service, and the Desire for More
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As a new mom, Emma wrestles with how to raise her son with openness and integrity while still holding onto the faith that has carried her through. She speaks candidly about wanting to deepen her life of service and how vulnerability—not certainty—opens the door to transformation, connection, and peace.
Two Special Events—Join Us!
We’re four months into The Gospel of Direct Experience podcast, and we’re so grateful for your support—thank you for listening, reviewing, and reaching out. It means the world to us.
This podcast isn’t just about sharing our thoughts—it’s about building community. So, we’re launching two live events to connect more deeply with you.
Event #1: Live AMA (Ask Me Anything)
Thursday, June 12th at 6 PM PT / 9 PM ET
Join us live on Zoom for a laid-back Q&A session. Ask Michael, me, or both of us anything—about the podcast, spirituality, your own journey, or whatever’s on your heart.
RSVP by emailing us at [email protected].
Can’t make it? Email us your question by Wednesday, June 11th, and we might include it when we release the AMA as an episode later in June.
Event #2: Gnostic Town Hall
Thursday, July 10th at 6 PM PT / 9 PM ET
This is your time to share. We want to hear your stories, experiences, and spiritual desires. What are you seeking? What does authentic spiritual practice mean to you?
RSVP the same way: [email protected].
This is just the beginning—we hope to see you soon.
Continue the Conversation
What did you think about this episode? Tell us at [email protected] or by visiting our website. While you're there:
- Sign up for our mailing list to keep up to date on the all the latest from us
- Contact us about your own experiences, questions, comments