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SFIO 207-Story, Identity, and 30 Years Together

Still Figuring It Out

Release Date: 06/10/2025

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📋 Episode Summary (Long)

In this episode, recorded on their anniversary, Marc and Emily reflect on 30 years of marriage—and use it as a lens to explore the role of story and identity in leadership, coaching, and everyday life.

They revisit their shared love of children’s books, read-alouds during 2 a.m. nursing sessions, and the way stories have always been a thread in their family, work, and lives. From The Giving Tree to Anne of Green Gables, storytelling was how they passed on values, built imagination, and created connection.

The conversation moves into coaching and leadership development, exploring why so many people—especially leaders—discredit or downplay their own stories. They share practical insights about helping clients recognize the narratives they repeat (both helpful and limiting), and how stories become mirrors for values and identity.

This episode also includes a reflection on where they’ve been and where they’re going next. From international travel that didn’t happen to the possibility of RV adventures ahead, Marc and Emily keep it honest, reflective, and lighthearted. Whether you’re celebrating an anniversary of your own or simply thinking about how your story shapes your path, this one is full of warm wisdom.

 

🔑 Key Takeaways

  • Stories shape identity—and that’s true for individuals, families, and organizations.
  • We often undervalue our own stories because we’re too close to them.
  • Leadership coaching can help surface patterns and narratives clients may not even realize they’re repeating.
  • There’s power in asking, “Is this story still serving me—or my team?”
  • Permission to share your story is sometimes the most transformational part of coaching.

 

🗣 Quote Highlights

“It’s just my life. It’s not my identity.” – Emily
“Story is how we wire the brain—and how we invite others to understand us.” – Marc
“One of the most important things we do in coaching is help people recognize the stories they’re living in.” – Emily
“We’ve said yes to almost every adventure.” – Emily
“I’d rather say I’m sorry than spend a lifetime asking ‘what if?’” – Marc

 

🔗 Resources & Mentions

  • The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein
  • The Surprising Gift of Doubt by Marc A. Pitman
  • United States Bartenders’ Guild (USBG) leadership session
  • Books mentioned: The Lord of the Rings, Narnia, A Wrinkle in Time, Anne of Green Gables
  • Coaching references: Co-Active Coaching, story-based tools from Quadrant 3 Leadership Coach Certification