.54 not Harvard, but Heaven: the true goal of parenting (and other Advent thoughts) 🎄
Release Date: 12/02/2024
Own Your Revival
Feeling like you’re parenting a grown man with a beard and a Costco membership? If you’re the one managing the calendar, fixing problems, and carrying the emotional load in your marriage, this episode is for you. In “You’re Not His Mother: How to Stop Parenting Your Husband and Lighten Your Load,” we dive into the common—but often unspoken—parent-child dynamic that can quietly take over marriages. You’ll learn how to: Recognize when you’re overfunctioning and mothering your spouse Start breaking the cycle by stepping back with courage and grace Reclaim your energy and...
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I’ll never tell you whether to stay or leave a relationship—that’s a deeply personal decision, and safety always comes first. What I will say is that sometimes, when one person starts to shift—by speaking up, setting boundaries, and reconnecting with who they are—the dynamic can begin to change. In this episode, I share a moment at the gym that unexpectedly mirrored what real strength looks like in hard relationships. It’s not always in the dramatic decisions. Sometimes the flex is in the small reps—done with intention, clarity, and truth. 👉 If this conversation...
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In today’s episode, I’m joined by Ashley Montag, MS, LIMHP, LMFT—a Catholic therapist and founder of —for a rich and grace-filled conversation about what true healing looks like: mind, body, and soul. We talk about the difference between trauma and unforgiveness, and why the feelings that surface when we see someone from our past don’t necessarily mean we’re doing something wrong. Ashley shares powerful, compassionate insights about being fully seen by God and learning to live from your true identity, even when old wounds resurface. If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Why does it...
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When you're in—or recovering from—a destructive relationship, especially while trying to co-parent, it’s tempting to focus solely on the other person’s behavior. But what if one of the most powerful paths to healing is found in taking an honest look at your part? In this episode, we dive into a deeper examen of how we may unknowingly contribute to the relational patterns we desperately want to break. This isn’t about blame—it’s about awareness, growth, and the freedom that comes from doing things differently moving forward. This conversation is raw, real, and rooted in...
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In this heartfelt episode, we delve into the emotional complexities that arise when significant life events don't unfold as envisioned. Whether it's a milestone celebration, a family gathering, or any pivotal moment, unmet expectations can leave us feeling disappointed and emotionally drained. You're not alone in this experience. Join us as we explore three comforting truths that can help you navigate these feelings, embrace the beauty in imperfection, and find peace amidst the chaos. Let's shift the focus from perfection to presence and discover the profound impact of showing up...
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Ever find yourself bracing before holidays, birthdays, or big life events—wondering if someone is going to ruin it again? You’re not alone. In this episode, we’re digging into a pattern I call emotional whiplash—those sudden outbursts that seem to come out of nowhere right before something good. We’ll explore why it happens, what’s really going on, and how to start protecting your peace even if someone else refuses to change. This one is especially for the woman who thinks she’s crazy for dreading the moments that are supposed to bring joy. You’re not crazy. You’re waking up....
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Today’s episode is one that I know will stay with you. I’m joined by Lauren from Louisiana—the first guest I’ve had on the show who I met out on the interwebs—and I’ve completely fallen in love with her beautiful faith, her mindful way of sharing her story, and (let’s be honest) her pursuit of the perfect king cake. She’s a mama of four, and in this conversation, she opens up about the silence she once kept around the pain in her marriage, the mixed responses she received when she finally spoke up, and the slow, sometimes lonely process of finding people who could truly enter...
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Someone recently asked me how to find a spiritual director, and I shared the best advice I ever got: Even when you think you’ve found the right one, meet with them a few times before you decide. That wisdom has echoed in so many other areas of life. Because often, we want clarity before we take action. But what if the clarity only comes after we’ve had the courage to show up, take the next step, and trust the process? In this episode, I’m sharing the tender truth of what it means to move forward without all the answers—and how transformation unfolds one faithful step at a time. 💫...
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In today’s episode, we’re diving into a tough topic: when coparenting isn’t working. You may have found yourself stuck in a situation where communication is broken, and cooperation feels impossible. While coparenting is the ideal, it’s not always achievable. So, what do you do when it’s just not working? In this episode, I’ll explore the concept of parallel parenting, how to shift your approach, and what you can do to create a peaceful environment for your kids—even when the other parent isn’t on board. Let’s talk about how you can regain control, set boundaries, and build...
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In today’s episode, we dive into the powerful shift from asking "Why?" to embracing the bigger questions that lead to real change in your life. We often get stuck in the cycle of wondering why things happen or why people act the way they do, but this focus on “why” keeps us from stepping into the role of a change agent in our own lives. I’ll walk you through how shifting your perspective can help you take control, make powerful choices, and move toward the transformation you’re seeking. Whether you see yourself as a leader or not, this episode will encourage you to take action and...
info_outlineWelcome back to Own Your Revival🔥
As we enter this time of slowing down, waiting and preparing for the birth of our Lord, which is opposite of everything we see, hear and experience in a culture that practically steps over the Thanksgiving holiday to push Christmas + consumerism, can we prepare our hearts to receive Jesus on Christmas? I humbly propose we move the needle off of productivity and checking all the lists twice to a healthy balance focused on maintaining presence with Christ in prayer and those we love on the daily. As we enter the sacred season of Advent, it's a time to step back and reflect on our journey, embracing the quiet moments that allow us to listen for God's voice amidst the busyness of life. This season invites us to grieve the losses that come with change—whether it's the evolution of family traditions or the growing independence of our children—while also creating space for meaningful connections. By prioritizing stillness and prayer, we can draw closer to Jesus, nurturing our hearts and those of our loved ones as we prepare for His coming. In this way, Advent becomes not just a countdown to Christmas, but a profound opportunity for spiritual renewal and familial bonding. Join me inside this episode (complete with a crackling 🔥 in the background) for more meditations on this.
📆 Podcast will pause for Advent after this episode until January 6, 2025. Subscribe on your podcast app to not miss a beat. 🎄🥳
🖥️ Links/Mentions:
Dr. Ken Adams: Getting Through the Holidays with Enmeshment : 👍🏼👍🏼
Discalced Carmelites of Jesus, Mary and Joseph in Valparaiso, NE 🙏🏼✝️
Andy Arbie, ICF Associate Certified Coach
📲 Connect with Andy☀️
➡️ Instagram: @andyarbie
➡️ Website: www.andyarbie.com/connect
➡️ Book a discovery call here. ✨
➡️ Soulful Sunday Reflections: www.andyarbie.com/soulful-sunday
I’d love to hear your comments, questions, suggestions about the show! ⬇️
Would you leave a review on Apple podcast? ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Thank you so much!
xoxo
Andy