Are you thinking "Celestial"
Off-Limits With Ashley and Amanda
In today’s episode Ashley and I talk about how the church’s latest teachings of not talking to those who “attack the truth” and “don’t question your testimony.” They have deemed it “thinking Celestial” and it is the path to playing the long game of life and attaining what you desire in the afterlife. Whether you find peace within the church, are questioning it, or are ready to run for the hills, this episode will help you decipher what truly feels good to you and just because you choose differently than the church, it doesn’t mean the devil has taken you over. The exact...
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You don't have to have sex on your wedding night
Off-Limits With Ashley and Amanda
Oof, today we are diving into another off-limit topic…. Sex yet again! Today Ashley and I open up about the trauma that having sex when you are not ready causes. In the LDS religion you are taught to save yourself for your wedding night with your husband, but the church also teaches that no self-exploration, intimacy with someone else, or sexual thoughts should be entertained beforehand which leads to a lot of fear on some bride’s wedding nights. Although Ashley and I didn’t have the experience of not having sex before marriage, we share our experience with it in our relationships as...
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How to support family when they want to leave the church- gaslighting isn't helpful
Off-Limits With Ashley and Amanda
In this podcast episode, Ashley and Amanda talk about the challenges and fears that individuals face when deciding to step away from their religious community. They discuss how people may feel judged or criticized for their choices and the process of shedding ingrained beliefs and practices, such as wearing sacred garments. The conversation also dives into the importance of empathy and understanding in these situations especially from family members who don’t understand or are still in it. It’s about creating a safe and non-judgmental space for open conversations and Ashley and...
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Families are forever if...
Off-Limits With Ashley and Amanda
Ashley and Amanda talk about their experiences growing up in a high-demand religion. They share their perspectives and trauma associated with their upbringing in the church. Ashley discusses how her dad wasn't a member until she was 10. She shares feeling the absence of a priesthood holder in their household and the confusion it caused her as a child and how the church's teachings implied that her father was "less than" because he didn't live by their standards. Amanda talks about the complexities of leaving such a tightly-knit religious community. She touches on the most recent church...
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Church isn't a fix all for problems
Off-Limits With Ashley and Amanda
In this episode, we talk about how growing up in our religious community affected different parts of our lives, like relationships, self-esteem, and mental health. We start off with the misconception that following religious rules can magically solve all our marriage, sex, and self-worth issues. It's like we were told, "Just pray more, read the scriptures, and visit the temple more often." We talk about how this advice often makes things worse instead of better. Growing up in this religion would often leave us in conversations where others would say things like, "If only you guys...
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Embracing Sexuality In Religious Culture
Off-Limits With Ashley and Amanda
Today, we're chatting about the complexities of navigating sex within the context of our religious upbringing, particularly within the Church. If you haven’t, we do encourage you to listen to our previous episode on shame and trauma related to sex, where we talk about the profound impact of religious teachings on our perception of sex while growing up. We discuss the challenges of transitioning from being taught that sex is forbidden to suddenly being expected to engage in it frequently after marriage. We share our personal experiences, including Amanda getting pregnant before marriage and...
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The Trauma not having conversations about sex causes
Off-Limits With Ashley and Amanda
In this podcast episode, Ashley and I have a very open and honest conversation about body autonomy, shame, and abuse within religious contexts, particularly focusing on our experiences in the LDS Church. We discuss how suppressing open conversations about sexuality can lead to problematic behaviors and even contribute to the prevalence of pornography and sex addiction. We emphasize the importance of allowing children to explore their bodies without shame and the significance of setting appropriate boundaries. We share our own childhood experiences, where there were no...
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Healing from Religious Trauma: Navigating the Impact of organized religion
Off-Limits With Ashley and Amanda
In this powerful discussion, Amanda and Ashley open up about their experiences with religious trauma, specifically within the context of the LDS Church (Mormonism). They share their personal journeys of questioning, leaving, and healing from the effects of growing up in a highly conservative religious environment. The conversation covers a wide range of topics, including the damaging impact of shame around sexuality, the lack of proper mental health support within the church, and the importance of seeking outside perspectives for healing. The biggest thing here is that we want you to...
info_outlineToday, we're chatting about the complexities of navigating sex within the context of our religious upbringing, particularly within the Church.
If you haven’t, we do encourage you to listen to our previous episode on shame and trauma related to sex, where we talk about the profound impact of religious teachings on our perception of sex while growing up.
We discuss the challenges of transitioning from being taught that sex is forbidden to suddenly being expected to engage in it frequently after marriage.
We share our personal experiences, including Amanda getting pregnant before marriage and the immense shame that followed.
We explore the lingering shame and guilt surrounding our sexual experiences, confession to church authorities, and the pressure to follow church doctrine.
We also address the importance of consent in the context of a culture that often suppresses discussions around sexual desires. We highlight the importance of open communication with our partner about our sexual needs and desires.
We’re talking all about the uncomfy things here! At least the things that have been uncomfy for most of us all of our lives.
Self-exploration and understanding our own desires and preferences is one thing we touch on and share about.
Ultimately, our discussion sheds light on the impact of religious conditioning on our sexual attitudes and the importance of breaking free from it to build healthier, more fulfilling sexual relationships.
Find Amanda Here:
https://www.instagram.com/amandaclarkstudios/
Free Breathwork Session: https://TheBreathworkMethod.as.me/free-integrative
Find Ashley here:
Website: https://www.ashleybucknerlmft.com/
Insta: https://www.instagram.com/ashleybucknerlmft/
Recommended Books:
Slammed by Colleen Hoover: https://amzn.to/3PidRQM (also a good one for Teens)
Reminders of Him by Colleen Hoover: https://amzn.to/3RrvZuk
Court of Thorns & Roses by Sarah J Mass: https://amzn.to/3F4roXA
4th Wing by Rebeccas Yarros: https://amzn.to/3rz9hpN